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rayray

:: 2009 6 June :: 2.55pm

Last night I had the time of my life, and I broke out of my shell a little bit..
I don't EVER dance, because I have no rhythm, and I just feel awkward when I try..
But I danced A LOT last night..
And had a blast.. there were several pictures taken.. i have some posted on facebook.. but there are some that are better left off the internet.. lol

I wonder what is in store for the rest of the weekend!!

will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 2 June :: 9.05pm

So I got a new puppy for my birthday, and his name is Dozer..
He's a little ass hole terror with a 'gina..
(And yes, I said HE has a GINA).. when they neutered him, they only took his nuts, not the sac, so my poor baby looks like a hermie!! :(
Anyway, he has chewed up a slipper, stretched out 5 of my socks in a rough game of tug-a-war, and today he managed to eat half a flip-flop, and chewed the rest to pieces..
When I came home to find it, I yelled at him, and went to spank him but he ran onto my bed because he was scared and tried to hide, and when I went to grab ahold of him, he started peeing and pee'd on my ARM and my bed..

I felt bad because I scared him, but I was so mad that he chewed up my flip-flop, and then pee'd..
Also, he's a bad influence on my poor doodles..
So now he gets caged when we leave..
Which is mean, because doodles will just sit in front of the cage and taunt him, and then pounce at him trying to get him to play..

3 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 22 May :: 10.48pm

So I have only had My new dog since Wednesday night and he has already developed a bra fetish and has ran off twice. Not to mention he chewed up a whole tune of chap-stick, taken over tanks peanut butter roll and completely demolished a chew toy while playing a rough game of tug-a-war. He is definitely a running little bastard! I sprinted for probably 3 blocks to get him today like 5 seconds after I got home from work and spent an hour looking for the little shit last night. He is definitely not a lazy dog like My little baby doodles that is for damn sure!

I finally got some new tires and rims for My car. I had the seats taken out so that I could clean it out and I got My headlights adjusted so they work a little better. Now I just need to wash it.

My sister, Derrick and seth are up for the weekend and i'm super excited about that.

And I am feeling better about everything so that is another plus. I love having a washer and dryer! Best inventions ever.

2 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 20 May :: 7.49pm

is getting another dog for her birthday!! :)

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rayray

:: 2009 13 May :: 8.30pm

Found herself a washer and dryer for fifty bucks!
And is super excited..

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rayray

:: 2009 12 May :: 10.43pm

So i'm feeling better than I did on Friday.
Much much better.
I just really wish I could find another Boston terrier for me or at least a Boston playmate for my dog.

I'vr narrowed things down to the fact that I hate my job more than anything. Seriously, to the point where I am miserable every single day and I don't want to get out of bed.

4 will hate me | will you love or hate


skife

:: 2009 11 May :: 7.45pm

I'm still depressed about this shit.

it seems that when i finally get my life back on track, i start getting my bills cought up i get kicked in the face.

what the fuck.. really?

i'm so sick of this shit.

to put the icing on the cake, today i got my insurence card... and it'll never get used because i don't have insurence.


why me?

3 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 9 May :: 12.17am

Life was better on prozac..
I've been at this place before..
Where nothing makes sense, but at the same time, everything makes sense to me.
I have everything most girls dream of, yet I am lacking so many things that other people have and dream of.
Sometimes I think that I want to be single and live alone.
But the problem with that is, I haven't ever lived on my own. I hate being at home alone. I tried living on my own once, and Mike was over everyday, and then he moved completely in.
I need to balance independent and dependent.
I'm back to where I was when I was in high school..
Crying about every little thing.
Making everyone miserable because I'm sad all the time..
Even though I really have no reason to be unhappy..
And seriously, I have no idea how Mike deals with it.
He tries to cheer me up, but it only lasts for a little bit..
Until I start thinking about how much my life is lacking in different areas..

I have so many hopes and dreams that I don't put into action.
So many ties..

And sadly I think the only fix is prozac.
And the problem with that is, I don't have health insurance!

4 will hate me | will you love or hate


skife

:: 2009 8 May :: 11.24am

Can anyone reach the knife that's in my back?

I was just laid off, a week before insurance starts, i can't get unemployment either.

this is bullshit.

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rayray

:: 2009 3 May :: 1.10pm

Things are starting to look up.. Other than I have 6 exams due by thursday.. and being that I have to work monday-thursday, I have no idea when i am going to be able to make it up to the college before the lab closes so that I can get all my exams in..

Kind of worried about it.. but who knows.. maybe something will work out for me..

I still have work for 2 classes to do yet.. And there are a couple of assignments for one class that I can't figure out how to do certain things.. so yeah, im screwed!

will you love or hate


skife

:: 2009 2 May :: 11.13am

err i mean the H1N1 flu... yeah.

1 will hate me | will you love or hate


skife

:: 2009 2 May :: 11.13am

wait, errr ummm.. uhhh.

not SARS, that was the popular thing to have 2 years ago.

last year was west nile and the bird flu
oh yeah this year its the swin flu.

so i now have the swine flu

5 will hate me | will you love or hate


skife

:: 2009 2 May :: 11.12am

I now have SARS....



that is all.

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rayray

:: 2009 28 April :: 7.54pm

Found a new home for her cat, and is now balling like a 3 year old..

The ad was on craigslist for like 3 hours..

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rayray

:: 2009 27 April :: 6.08pm

I've been putting some serious thought into a career path, and I still have no clue what I want to do with my life.
I want out of this factory crap.
I keep thinking that there is a job out there that I will enjoy every moment of, and the people won't irritate me.
But lets be serious, that doesn't exsist.
At least not for me.

Any suggestions?

3 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 24 April :: 3.45pm

Well here is another thing to add to the list of things that keep making my life worse..

Mike's daughters mom and step dad are buying the house that I want more than anything so that their welfare kids can rent it from them..
I am super fucking pissed because they knew that I wanted that house, and was trying to get it..
Right now I am beyond super fucking pissed.

will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 21 April :: 5.54pm
:: Music: Hate my life - Theory of a Deadman

Not sure if it is because of the rain, or the sudden load of shit that has been dumped on me lately, but the song "Hate my life - Theory of a Deadman" is my theme song for the moment.. One verse in particular.

I still hate my job, my boss is a dick
"I don't get paid nearly enough
To put up with all of your shit"


1 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 21 April :: 2.43pm

Growing up I was never told that cheating was a good or bad thing. I have formed my own opinions on the subject.

But I can't believe she has the audacity to ask me not to be mad at him. I can understand that she wouldn't want my brother to know. But I honestly cannot believe she can ask me not to be mad at him. I may not have a lot of respect for the woman and she has done somf pretty questionable things in her life but I figured she'd make things right by not forgiving someone for doing the same thing she has done to every guy she has been with.

Makes me sick.

will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 20 April :: 10.55pm

So right now out of all the things that were bugging me the only thing left is how emotionally disconnected I feel from my family. Well, I guess you can add friends to that too.

I feel like everyone is against me. Sometimes when I spend time with my family I feel like they aren't even my family and it is a horrible feeling.

Will it ever go away?

will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 17 April :: 11.50am

Things are better already..
It took them forever to get my check thing situated and really it didnt get situated but whatever..
The owner of the company gave me cash.. Went to the bank, withdrew money and said "here you go, when you get your check in the mail just cash it, and give me back the same amount I just gave you."
Because my check went to my old address it will take up to a week for the tranfer of address to go through or whatever..
Yay!

2 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 16 April :: 7.39pm

Things in my life couldn't be any more crappy..
I have a bitch trying to aggravate me to leave Mike, because she thinks I am not qualified to take care of her sister..
I want to buy a house, but that is not going the way I had planned..
I barely have credit, so I can't get a loan, they want me to get a credit card, but I can't get a credit card because I barely have credit..
I didn't get my paycheck today, and who knows when I will get one..
Apparently it got mailed out, or so they think, they aren't really sure.. My check NEVER gets mailed out..
So I have to wait until tomorrow to see if I get it..
But here is the real kicker, they asked me to verify my address, and they only have my old address on file.. So my check was sent to that address.. Delaying it just a couple of more days..
I asked them to re-issue me a new one and void the one they sent out..
But their response was "we have to wait and see if you get it"
Leaving me to wait until fucking MONDAY to see if I get a check and if I don't then they will re-issue me a new one, and have someone from Owosso drop it off at work for me..

Fucking A.. Not to mention, my boss and I have been going rounds all week because he is a fucking moron..

So I right now, I am ready to just quit life. I want to cry, curl up in a ball and sleep for like a month..

3 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 12 April :: 7.20pm

So I had Easter dinner with both my parents, at my moms house..

Apparently hell froze over..

4 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 8 April :: 5.45pm

So I put an old mixed cd in my cd player today on the way home from work because I needed some new music, and I forgot what was on the CD..
And all these memories hit me like a ton of bricks..
Some good, some bad, and some that I can't seem to get off my mind.

This CD had songs that describe so many things in my life..
One song in particular hit home.. Well actually two songs hit home..
And now I can't get the one song out of my head..
And its probably not the best idea for it to be there..

Ugh.. this is why people label should label their cd's..

4 will hate me | will you love or hate


skife

:: 2009 5 April :: 1.35pm

Fuck x64 vista.

32 bit W7 here i come, the time is now.

2 will hate me | will you love or hate


rayray

:: 2009 4 April :: 9.59pm

I seriously feel like I am losing my mind.
And one thing I hate more than anything, is when people don't listen to me, or acknowledge the fact that I am talking to them..

Not to mention I have other things on my mind that are making me want to throw up and crawl in a corner and cry because that is the only way I know how to deal with them, have known how to deal with them for a very long time..

How fucking lame..

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