moana
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2004 11 February :: 8.25am
:: Mood: nervous
:: Music: naruto - 2nd opening
i (heart) uchiha sasuke-kun (AKA the topless boy in my background)
ok and then i got to school nice n early. don't remember most of the morning, but i remember AC was there. hmm... wonder why i forget so easy... yeah and then i had history first period n i got a hershey cuz i had a 10/10 on my quiz! woohu! well we had drama next and were at the auditorium and did sleeping beauty AGAIN. i had my part perfect so yay (the director said so so HA). then, i cried. i just sat there backstage, talking to fredubine about how i've lost everyone i've cared about, faisal particularly, and cried. naturally, as my luck would have it, conway chose that moment to call me downstage n ask me about the photography of the fine arts festival. and guess who i was sent with to fetch the camera? faisal. ugh i wanted to die. we did half of cinderella afterwards and i managed to pull myself together beautifully. i played my happy role, recited my lines and honed my character to perfection. then the play was over, i dropped the act, and i was in a gloom for the rest of third period. and then, it happened...
last thirty minutes of class we get free time and teodore, eternal flirt, chose to go through my wallet. in exchange, he let me go through his wallet. well as i was going through it, i found a CONDOM in on of the side pockets. i put it up n go "wtf?" he goes red n snatches it. then we get into a discussion, with moonsuk, about sex, one night stands, fuck buddies, girlfriends and birthcontrol. it was hilarious, no like HILARIOUS. comparing the efficiency of male condoms versus female condoms, diaphrams and the pill. pulling out, that kinda thing. at around that time tammam decides to pass out. seriously. i moved his circulation, encouraged oxygen and blood passage to his head, and gave him natural massage therapy. he enjoyed it so much, according to moonsuk his face looked like he was orgasming. we laughed, then teodore asked me to give him one too. well as i was giving him a massage (i said i should have been getting paid for it) dzaner decides to come up from behind and give ME a massage. oh. my. God. no really, oh. my. God. i literally burst out laughing at how good it felt. teodore then got pissed n went all "focus! focus!" i pushed him n told him to shut up, so he goes "work on my body!" we started cracking up! then tammam gave me a massage, and i don't know who gave who a massage, and it was like one big massage thing. so much fun. i walked out with teodore, talking about who knows what. then stit stopped me and took me aside because he saw my right side where i was wearing two earrings to get me into trouble. then i point at my left earringless ear and smirk. "one pair of earrings, the handbook said nothing about which ear it went on" i win! hahaha! BA3SA!
let's see, the remainder of the day, AC got pissed, yelling, arabic class, english class we watched an episode of oprah winfrey... yeah.
so that's it. and then...
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buttercup954
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2004 10 February :: 9.36pm
word
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moana
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2004 10 February :: 12.30pm
:: Mood: jubilant
:: Music: metallica - unnamed feeling
been here before couldn't say i liked it, do i start writting all this down?
today started out horribly. i woke up and the first thing i realize is "my hand hurts" and i open my fist and i'd been holding that little "I LOVE YOU" stone all night. naturally, as soon as i fuckin see it i start crying. i miss him so bad sometimes. it took me a good fifteen minutes to stop, and then i forgot to wake my mom up and went to the bathroom myself. by the time i woke her up it was 7 and i just knew we were gonna be late for school. i had the worst headache, and i was jsut ready to drop wherever i happened to be standing and cry my eyes out. but things got better. as i was walking to my locker, i saw barney and she stops me to scream "LYSEE'S HERE!" so i rushed to my locker and we rushed to the auditorium together, but not before out of the corner of my eye i saw AC and B walking together, like TOGETHER together. in my haste, i failed to stop and inquire, but i'll get back to that later. so yea, i go to the auditorium and ANDY CAME! I HEART YOU ANDY! IT'S ABOUT FUCKIN TIME! i hugged her until she couldn't baethe and we laugehd for no reason and talked and caught up and things. well first period, math, was just math. we had a fun lesson though, i loved the proofs of the sum and difference trigonometric functions. i loved the derivations of the formulas. even teodore was all "wtf? i don't get it.." and i was all "yay i see!" felt smart. good self esteem.
second period, english, let's just suffice to say SOMEONE IN MY GROUP EVALUATED ME DOWN so that my grade was an 82% while the group grade was an 89%. i didn't say anything about it, even though i know perfectly who it is.
well, arabic class, i talked to AC about variousity, and she managed to remain rather calm throughout the class. we discussed what went down with beladi, who apparently misunderstands things more than i thought was possible, but that's over now, and then i let her read some of my latest work, READERS, WRITERS AND THE AUDIENCE UNDER GRAVITY. she said she liked it, it was different from what i usually did. *half-assed happy dance*
lunch was yippeed, i clung tenaciously to andy and attacked her at various moments. FREDUBINE IS PT! congratulations fredubine! gave blag his birthday present and he liked it and i'm pleased with myself.
onwards, i had physics, and i asked young about the lab due on saturday i was all "i have emac fine arts, i'm not gonna be here" and he goes "why don't you learn to manage your time? you're in high school and in IB" i wanted to KILL HIM. so basically i have to hand it in anyway and i should be working on it now but i don't wanna. so we did a self-study the rest of the class in silence. i got mufida to let me do something with her hair, and she has BEAUTIFUL hair mashalla *knocks on wood*. i pulled her hair back loosely, then dropped some strands on her face and took off her glasses. she looked GORGEOUS, she has the most beautiful smile. i'm so jealous :(
i had computers last period and i finished my cover page which i'm VERY VERY proud of. then drama rehearsals. I STRADDLED FREDUBINE! haha we practiced waltzing barefoot and fredubine got her character down PERFECTLY. i was all teary eyed n proud. YOU ROCK MY WORLD FREDUBINE. well afterschool i FINALLY caught mr. mclean. and i pitched my idea to him about a creative writting course, and he LOVED it, he was all "you just made my day" and he took my name and said he would speak to both my english teacher and the head of english department. i'm so proud! i'm making a difference! he asked me what kind of writting i did. i told him EVERYTHING and it wasn't a lie. i can write social, fiction, biographical, persuasive, instructional and poetry. *kisses her own ass*
well i got home and my bther's been in a bitchy mood all fuckin day which is seriously pissing me off. you'd think he was the one with PMS. pshhh. well anyhow, i told him i needed internet to do homework cuz i needed to download my physics lab outline. every two seconds he'd walk into my room and go "are you really doing homework?" i wanted to knock him out. damn!
and here i am now. recollecting. yay. and then...
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nerdalert
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2004 9 February :: 10.42pm
things i say a lot
im trying to think of some of the things that i say a lot, there is one that i got someone else saying for a while, but now neither of us can remember what it was. heres what i can think of......
well alright
okray
you know it
check ya later
letz go (like from billy madison)
she-it
let me know if you can think of any
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WhitePony
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2004 8 February :: 2.56pm
:: Music: Before The Storm - Hold Your Tongue
Welly Welly, I haven't written in this mofo for eons. Well we played a show last night. It was fun. I am getting better at playing live. My hand didn't cramp as much and I didn't let the crowd get into my head and make me nervous. But my back and neck hurt today, cuz I rocked out like a true bastardly rock star. We played at some girl's party with a couple other local bands and it was a pretty fun night for the most part. At first I was a little bummed that we had to play first but then realized that its better because if cops come and break it up we wouldn't be able to play and last night right when the last band was about to play the power went out. haha, that sucks. The veteran band Endothrot really liked us and complimented us, great ego boost. A downside was that we played in a dingy, dirty ol' basement with yellow spiderwebs spread across the ceiling and cat shit in the corner. And the fact that 90% of the people there were smoking cigs made me feel like I had smoked twenty packs by the end of the night. Seriously, my lungs felt like they were gonna burst. And being that we were in a basement with no ventilation, besides a single door, didn't help. And y'know, being that it was a party... ok, there is going to drinking obviously. But Matt works at 10pm as a loader for Wal-Mart and he was so extremely drunk and high. Apparently he called into work and told them he'd be a little late, but at like 9:30 he was still double-fisting (holding an open beer can in each hand for those of you who don't know) But whatev, its his life, we can't be his babysitters. Except for the fact that it affects us. Because if he loses his job he won't be able to buy better equipment and he'll be even further away from getting his own car, cuz we have to cart his ass around. And on our way out to bring our stuff back out to my dad's we drove by a gas station and apparently JJ had been pulled over and was undergoing a DUI test. GREAT! He was pretty hammered too. So hopefully he passed because otherwise we'll be without a singer for awhile because he lives in SLO and we practice in Paso, so he won't have transportation. Irresponsibility.... tisk tisk tisk.
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nerdalert
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2004 8 February :: 3.39pm
woo hoo!
well this weekend was awesome. i got to use my new board, and it rocks, its sooooo fast. im kinda disappointed in myself bc i was kinda wussy, i didnt really hit any jumps good, i went off of two table tops, and a jump, but didnt get too much air. it was awesome hanging out with elly though.
friday was also fun, me and craig played bball against doyle and one of her friends, and volleyball too. and we played rummy too.
on the down side, i broke my cell phone, it was in my pocket, and my hip bone landed on it on my 1st wipe out (i only wiped out like 4 times the whole night though). i had one weird ass wipeout though. i was going, and then all the sudden i was on my ass, and it hurt like hell! when we got to the bottom, elly was like "what happened there?" and i said "i dont know, i was thinking maybe you saw" it was realy weird.
so to go with the cell phone thing, i need everyones school and cell phone numbers, bc i dont have them anymore bc they were in my phone, which no longer works, but i have a new one to put them in now. so either call me, (586) 201-8948, or send me a message on AIM or email me, or leave it on here
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moana
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2004 8 February :: 12.28am
they who were not there
if it's only there to be misspoken
hearts are lost and lives are broken
learn the language of my world
to take home a word of token
dig a hole in this misery
lay me down and bury me
then walk away from my shore and its waves
my misery doesn't like company
don't cry for help when must you drown
the time has come you must go down
don't wait for hope to dessert you
when you are gone your dignity's your crown
someday their trust will cause you hurt
don't give them room to reassert
the faithlessness of humanity
when they will someday dessert
don't await a lying savior
bare your teeth, produce your raviar
waiting for a hope not there
is setting yourself up for failure
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moana
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2004 7 February :: 12.22pm
:: Mood: PISSED AS FUCK
:: Music: orgy - slept so long
AAARRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!
hermen told beladi about me n blag! he had n ofuckin right! i'm so fuckin MAD! I'M SO FUCKIN MAD! i cannot remember being so mad in months! i beat the crap out of the wall and nothing happened to it which just made me madder and i fucked my hand up and that makes me even MADDER and i'm just so fuckin pissed i mean WHAT THE FUCK?! BY WHAT RIGHT IS HE TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT ME AND BLAG? IN CASUAL CONVERSATION?! it was like "oh we're talking about relationships, you heard blag n fajer made out backstage?" wtf?! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! i have a fuckin reputation to uphold and he has no right to go shamble that shyt cuz he can't keep quiet on what doens't concern him! I'M SO MAD! i wanna kill him i wanna kill him i swear! shyt i'm so mad i can't even scream!
whoa, i'm so tired. i feel like i'm getting older. i'm so tired. i'm so mad and so tired, and the combination's going to kill me.
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buttercup954
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2004 6 February :: 5.02pm
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moana
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2004 6 February :: 1.36pm
:: Music: train - mississippi
she's the one that makes me fall... midnight moon shines through it all...
thank you barney for this cd, i (heart) it so much n so did scottie!
i spent the day at my dad's house. it was not bad, i missed my daddy truth be told. it felt comfortable all of us hanging out again. that plus i was having a super hairday and i felt great. the kids.... ugh. i remembered as soon as i got there i had forgotten HONEY. i walked around the garage a lot. i didn't do much work, just cleaned the buggy a bit, scraped the skeleton of the GMC, checked the hood of the caddy. needs an oil change. whatever.
i missed roaming the garage, the smell of cars is still heavenly, and the gasoline feels comfortably familiar on my fingers. i actually just dipped my hand in the fuel tank, just to get that feeling back. sad? oh well, at least i'm happy.
football season's over, basketball starts up. game between philly n miami, wanna check the score on that *prays for philly* and i'm still pissed as fuck that NEW ENGLAND FUCKIN NEW ENGLAND won the superbowl. ugh! as if! and then, i don't feel like school tomorrow! ahhhhhh! i wanna sleep late! and wake up late! *whimpers n whines alternatively*
and THEN, i better get some rest. maybe i can induce/entice myself into slumber.
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nerdalert
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2004 5 February :: 11.46am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: some radio depaul dork ;-)
weird ass dream again
i had a dream last night that me, adam michoski, craig, ryan moya and some random kids who were like 12ish were in the church basement and there was 1 squirl running around and the kids kept grabbing it. then all of the sudden there were 6 or so squirls, and adam was throwing these blue raquetball balls at me, and they came out of a bucket that had legos and balls in it. and every time he threw a ball at me a squirl would chase it. and craig was sitting on one of those round tables, and the balls kept bouncing off my head onto his lap, so the squirls kept jumping on him instead of me. and adam was laughing but everyone else was dead silent, and there was just like this loud background noise....like a ton of people talking at once.
i still think the flashing dream was weirder, but this one is odd
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moana
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2004 5 February :: 3.55pm
:: Mood: so very... THERE
:: Music: jack off jill - poor impulse control
one bullet in this gun, don't know if it's for you or me...
bored.. bored... and THEN still bored. morrow i go to father's house. the day after i go school. then ANDY COMES HOME! WOOHU! MISS YOU ANDY! (heart)
summer called this morning and woke me up. i was angry at first, but then we ended up talking for literally hours. (seriously, i checked the fone clock) she's so great! so funny and honest. we talked about lots of things, funny things, and laughed at not-so-funny things. it was great.
i spent the remainder of the day roaming about the home. my family quarrelled. i went to my room and danced. i've been packing on plenty of weight, so i cut back a bit on my calory intake. i also started doing sit-ups again, and working out variously while dancing ofcourse. fun.
i'm still bored. i go. and then
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nerdalert
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2004 5 February :: 3.11pm
:: Music: green day international super hits cd
well its actually thursday, such a long week. tomorrow i get to see craig and doyle, and then saturday i get to see elly.
i just got back from bball class, it was fun like always, but someone scratched in my arm pit....i have no idea how that happened!
ive been on a green day and blink 182 tangent lately, hmm.
my fingers still hurt from playing my guitar a lot lately.
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moana
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2004 5 February :: 1.53pm
Darkness. You Truly Desire Darkness. You wish
everyone around you was either dead, or
worshipping you. To you, life is not a gift,
but a punishment. You have no consideration for
others and do as you please.
PLEASE RATE
What Do You Truly Desire? *PICS*
brought to you by Quizilla
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