And life goes on........

:: 2006 26 March :: 6.17pm

sooooo maybe i'll go back to sleep for the 3rd time today since my life is so effing pathetic.

and boring.

and .

ugh fuck you seriously. fuck you and how much you unappreciate everything you have . you fucking whore.

JediBumblebee

:: 2006 26 March :: 12.43pm

I just realized that I said a couple entries ago that I needed a MONTH off for my honeymoon....lol. That would be sweet but not true. Only going for 7 days.

Need to do:
Schedule engagement pictures (c'mon warm weather)
Find florist
Find bartender
Order centerpieces
Decide on tuxes
Set menu with caterer
Order reponse cards
Get dress fitted
Rent dancefloor
Find makeup person?
Buy attendant gifts
Buy wedding rings
Write vows

I'm trying to pretend that that list isn't totally overwhelming me right now. I'm sitting here trying to tie little white bows on bells. ARGH!

I've kissed...Read more..

stinko

:: 2006 25 March :: 6.55pm

the sky is absolutely gorgeous right now.
it starts with a light blue, which is swirled with pink and purple. a rich dark blue is melting into the top.

i want summer now.
i need to waste away days outdoors.
i need to take walks and forget about school for a while.
i need to ride a bike.
i need to figure out what is going on with all of the people i love.

i have lost touch with a lot of things/people i care about.

stinko

:: 2006 24 March :: 12.26pm

i have just spent three hours by myself.
i did some homework.
i didn't speak to anyone.
i feel like a machine right now.
i need some human contact.
i am surrounded by people right now but i feel completely alone.

:: 2006 23 March :: 10.19pm

I've been gone for far too long, I want to come home
Well, to put it lightly, I haven't felt this dejected, irascible, neurotic, and disoriented in so long. Honestly.

I have decided I am going to play piano in the talent show. Please don't laugh at me.

I feel like since I hate and have hated high school so much that this will be a good way to end it. It might and hopefully will be a "happy" memory to leave school with. I guess.

And I don't know I just feel like my body is in 12 different places at once. I'm not all here and I can't stop biting my nails which I know is just gross and that is so not like me and when I develop a new bad habit, I know something is really wrong with me.

I feel so full like I need to pour everything out. I thought I did last night with that little breakdown but I guess I just filled right up again. In the worst way.

I guess that's it.
Jess.

shannonw55

:: 2006 23 March :: 7.22pm
:: Mood: loved
:: Music: Panic! At The Disco

The Great Gatsby
"His heart beat faster and faster as Daisy's white face came up to his own. He knew that when he kissed this girl, and forever wed his unutterable visions to her perishable breath, his mind would never romp again like the mind of God. So he waited, listening for a moment longer to the tuning fork that hade been struck upon a star. Then he kissed her. At his lips' touch she blossomed for him like a flower and the incarnation was complete."

I wanted to use this entire quote in my essay. But it's too long and doesn't relate to it... really at all. SIiiiiiggghh... nahhww...

:: 2006 23 March :: 3.53pm

So...

I have an interview at Menard's tomorrow... (like I need another job, or another new one for that matter..)
I don't know what I'm doing in my life...

I'm doing this thing that I don't want to do at all.

Yeah, what's new.

shannonw55

:: 2006 21 March :: 7.35pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Panic! At The Disco

When will I grow out of being a 40 year old woman?

8 Votes | Vote Here!

JediBumblebee

:: 2006 21 March :: 2.53pm

i woke up last night around 4 in the morning, shot up in bed, and said to myself, "how old am i? am i really only 21? 21 is way too young to be getting married! i must be crazy to be doing this! am i totally crazy?"
for some reason that question made a lot of sense, and i calmly said to myself, "yes, yes i am" (crazy, that is).

3 Votes | Vote Here!

:: 2006 20 March :: 7.16pm

oh. one more thing. I miss my friends.

and am I ugly?

1 Vote | Vote Here!

:: 2006 20 March :: 7.14pm

okay so well 2 more pages to go.....

ugh! suck me english paper! go to hell!

:: 2006 20 March :: 2.40pm

Nobody get too close to me...

I might taint you with my unholiness!

1 Vote | Vote Here!

:: 2006 20 March :: 1.54pm

can you believe i'm honestly STILL procrastinating to start writing this paper and it was DUE TODAY?!?! .....

so yeah... maybe i'll start it sometime today...

1 Vote | Vote Here!

:: 2006 18 March :: 10.39pm

and well blah blah blah and then she was dead.

ughghghgh the end.

Oh! But I see Roman tomorrow.... thumbs up! way up.

stinko

:: 2006 17 March :: 2.51pm

hot damn!!!
so i definately waited around for like three hours at school only to find that my teacher totally wasn't there and didn't bother to post it online or anything.
whatev.