shiznit05
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2004 18 January :: 12.40pm
Oftentimes we sit down and ask ourselves, "Why me?" You may feel like you ask yourself this question more than anyone else, Brittany. Your life probably seems like an intense roller-coaster ride that never comes to a stop. Deep down you realize that you would have it no other way. Take a break from it all today if you can. Communicate your thoughts and feelings to others. By talking it out, you will feel much better about the situation at hand.
ok this was my horoscope for today...and it elicited an interetsing conversation between jackie and myself...like i can totally relate to that however, its the last part that gets me...the whole communicating feelings and such..i dont know how to do that, like i know what im feeling, but the actually words to get them out there...it just doesnt work
but i think jackie and i came up with the problem...its the isolation after the sharing of the feelings that keeps us from putting them out there...im afraid that after i tell the person what i think, they wont understand it to the point that their misunderstandings cause them to shun the source aka me..therefore, to prevent this from happening i in turn keep it all to myself and tell people im ok when in all actualilty something could be bothering me and i only rely on myself to work it out...i dont know if thats actually somewhat solving the problem or creating more...who knows
let it
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shiznit05
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2004 17 January :: 10.58pm
:: Mood: sleepy
yay for lunch with tara...that was fun, we sat and talked for a long time...good times really
i dropped tara off at her friends house so she could be productive and learn kick, then i called doug, made plans, then went home...i hated home these past few days...so lonely...then i got home, doug called and canceled plans, saying he didnt want me to die, then plans were put back on because the weather decided to stop, so i met doug at 5, then went to the bank, finders, hunan, and meijer....we were busy people...all of which places were very entertaining..i wasnt exactly up to par during dinner so i apologize for what seemed to be my lack of enthusiasm...bad time of day i guess? but anyway, doug called sara and yelled at her because she wanted to go sledding and it was raining and sledding would be dumb, so we called the others and were like ok movie night at dougs (we watched 28 days later....very good movie!) but before the movie doug and i played 27 rounds of soul calibur...he won 14 to 13...i however believe i held me own very well and am proud of my video gaming, then we watched the movie and i left early so i wouldnt die...doug walked me to my car and told me to call when i got home so he knew i didnt die...so i called him and the other girls were still there playing mario kart...its been decided, i am the most skilled female video game player...im proud, what can i say? and i have to say that playing the video game was my favorite part of the day...little things in life make me happy...and i was so extremely happy then, i can't even describe it
i think tonight is the night to get some major sleep...my parents are home tonight so i should have no problems sleeping...so im happy :)
terminator is sweet
i think tomorrow is going to be dedicated to reading and spending some time with my mom...shes cool
thats it
1 blow |
let it
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shiznit05
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2004 17 January :: 11.37am
:: Mood: happy
getting ready to leave for taras house in about 20 minutes...we're going to go to el zarape, shes only been there once and frankly that is a crime, so i told her i was taking her there...she really didnt care where we went so it was easy deciding...plus its like 2 seconds from her house...and she doesnt know it yet but im taking her with me to get gas! haha...anyway then im supposed to call doug after that and hang out, that should be fun, i havent hung out with just doug in awhile, so yay for dinner with him (plus its chinese food and whats not to love about that)
ive already talked to my mom twice today...really no surprise in that, they have no idea when they're getting home, probably early evening is my assumption, but we'll see...Lord knows i'll talk to them at least two more times before they get home though :) it shows they care
hmm...nothing else really going on, i dont know whats up with the girls for tonigt, i havent talked to them yet today, so we'll see if i see them tonight or not...i'll probbaly come home right after dinner with doug so i dont die on the roads since its like crappy weather galore outside...i hope the weathers nice up in michigan with the guys...just as long as they come home safely its all good. but i'll have to wait for a call before i know anything
thats it
1 blow |
let it
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shiznit05
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2004 17 January :: 11.04am
:: Mood: indescribable
i've only heard this song maybe three times...and i cant get it out of my head, and i really like it
my immortal
my immortal
i'm so tired of being here
suppressed by all of my childish fears
and if you have to leave
i wish that you would just leave
because your presence still lingers here
and it won't leave me alone
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears
and i've held your hand through all of these years
but you still have all of me
you used to captivate me
by your resonating light
but now i'm bound by the life you left behind
your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears
and i've held your hand through all of these years
but you still have all of me
i've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
and though you're still with me
i've been alone all along
let it
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shiznit05
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2004 16 January :: 3.46pm
:: Mood: content
:: Music: jason mraz!
well spanish totally sucked it up today...that as not an easy exam, it wasnt hard, yet about half way through everything i though i knew started to blur together...basically im hoping low B, and thats pushing it. then i had study hall, sara and i looked at a prom magazine...man i find it humorous that people are already putting out magazine, however they are a great source of amusement..we spent a whole hour and a half going through that and criticizing the dressed and the articles and subtitles...much fun. and AS today was just great, 90 minutes of talking, we have these days in there where we put a subject out there and digress from it...i love it, it was a lot of fun, and i sat in doug's seat today since he wa late, and he sat behind me and HE SCRATCHED MY BACK!! who would have thought that dya would ever come, however, my entire back was a welt when he finished, but eh
my parents are leaving me tonight and going to see dan, they decided to leave a day early because of yucky weather we're supposed to be getting...so yay for being home alone tonight!
the guys should be leaving...well now...i'll give them a call sometime this weekend, its a bummer they're leaving, but i'll see them tuesday or wednesday so its fine
the terminator is sweet
im going out to lunch tomorrow with tara...being a sweet older cousin and all, and then going out with doug tomorrow night...when i told my mom that she wasnt too thrilled...we're supposed to get bad weather, so depending on the weather....hopefully it'll be ok though
i have a new guy that i can go to now if i feel the need to have blunt and somewhat harsh answers when i have something to talk about...i doubt i'll go to him though, because as i told him...his responses scare me...which i think they would scare anyone, but who knows, maybe i'll test out his listening abilities sometime
im going out with mges and amanda tonight...and a bball game! i love basketball, why i ever quit the sport i'll never know, but its still great to watch, so im excited, a night out with the girls! woo! as amanda put it....a night out with my favorite people, i felt loved :)
thats it
3 blows |
let it
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