godessalthena
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2015 1 September :: 8.35pm
I am not sure who I want to be right now.
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godessalthena
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2015 29 August :: 3.27pm
I cleaned the shit out of that apartment. I better get my deposit back. that place was a dump when I moved in!
but damn I sure am going to miss it. it was my little slice of heaven. I'm eager for my home. I'm going to make a list of things I really want it to have.. like a good view.
I am so exhausted but pretty content. seeing the doctor Thursday to see about my insomnia. I'm dying. and I have been having it since I started cymbalta.. say 5 years ago? I just need to sleep.
it rained today. it filled me with delight. everything is so thirsty.
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godessalthena
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2015 26 August :: 11.47am
:: Mood: ecstatic
the man from the shopping spree finally responded to my missed connection!!! and the adventure begins!
1 friend |
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godessalthena
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2015 20 August :: 7.58am
I hope my baby dog will be ok :(
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godessalthena
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2015 19 August :: 12.28pm
I just want to touch someone again.
I want to explore and admire a body.
I want to be held and kissed tenderly.
I want to give someone a massage.
I want to feel human again.
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godessalthena
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2015 15 August :: 8.51am
fuck you, Sus. I finally got to say what I wanted. I finally stood up for myself and drove that dagger as deep as it would go into your crocodilian hyde.
sistas are doin it for themselves.
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godessalthena
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2015 14 August :: 7.08am
shal·low
ˈSHalō/
adjective
1.
of little depth.
i.e. when the only reason you stay with someone is because they are pretty.
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godessalthena
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2015 11 August :: 3.35pm
all time low
I want to be exanimate.
there really isn't a point to any of this.
I'm tired of pain and rejection. of not fitting in. of all the barriers I create to ensure these are the ends I come to.
I miss my grandpa.
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godessalthena
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2015 11 August :: 10.47am
everyone is falling in love.
I feel left out.
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godessalthena
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2015 8 August :: 1.03pm
it's such a beautiful day out. I've gotten a few things accomplished.
and as the dye soaks into my damaged hair I wonder if once it's done I'll feel it's childish and feel ashamed.
I hate getting older. this world is so oppressive.
will I let the rebel in me die?
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alexithymia
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2015 8 August :: 4.00am
I wonder if I was ever an important and intregal part of someone's life. You know a person that they think back on and go " that person, my life is different because they were in it." ? Cause I'm feeling like I'm just this mediocre and entirely forgettable being. *sighs* 4 am extestential crisis for the win.
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godessalthena
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2015 6 August :: 7.52pm
sometimes, it feel better to just give in.
I want to let the dark consume me. I want to cry.
I want to feel my soul crush under the weight of desolate isolation.
it was so comforting. I miss that.
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godessalthena
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2015 5 August :: 10.14am
Everything's so blurry
And everyone's so fake
And everybody's empty
And everything is so messed up
Preoccupied without you
I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl
You could be my someone
You could be my scene
You know that I'll protect you
From all of the obscene
I wonder what you're doing
Imagine where you are
There's oceans in between us
But that's not very far
Can you take it all away?
Can you take it all away?
Well you shoved it in my face
This pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away?
Can you take it all away?
Well you shoved it in my face
Everyone is changing
There's no one left that's real
So make up your own ending
And let me know just how you feel
Cause I am lost without you
I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl
And you could be my someone
You could be my scene
You know that I will save you
From all of the unclean
I wonder what you're doing
I wonder where you are
There's oceans in between us
But that's not very far
Can you take it all away?
Can you take it all away?
Well you shoved it in my face
This pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away?
Can you take it all away?
Well you shoved it in my face
This pain you gave to me
Nobody told me what you thought
Nobody told me what to say
Everyone showed you where to turn
Told you when to run away
Nobody told you where to hide
Nobody told you what to say
Everyone showed you where to turn
Showed you when to run away
Can you take it all away?
Can you take it all away?
Well you shoved it in my face
This pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away?
Can you take it all away?
Well you shoved it in my face
This pain you gave to me
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godessalthena
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2015 4 August :: 9.53am
I love collecting secrets. it's one of those little joys in life.
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godessalthena
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2015 3 August :: 8.15pm
achievement unlocked: obtain a bachelor's degree.
D
1 perfect
57 great
I can't stop crying buckets of tears
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godessalthena
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2015 3 August :: 4.48pm
I have never felt smaller than when I stood on the glacier
and pretty words are just that - pretty words. they mean nothing with out action.
but truths, as everything else in life, are merely constructs from our perception. highly subjective and singular.
I can see lazy dragons hanging in the sky. lethargic leviathans drifting until they dissipate. tails drifting into the sunset...
someday I'll be the rain falling on a wedding.
someday I'll be the earth for new life to spring forth.
or maybe this is all a dream and we all awaken to a new world after it ends.
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