holiday
|
::
2004 10 March :: 7.34pm
Well well well. We meet at last.
I started/finished this great book today. "God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian" by Kurt Vonnegut. I highly recommend it. It's made me confused a little, but it's still really good.
"I wish one and all long and happy lives, no matter what may become of them afterwards. Use sunscreen! Don't smoke cigarettes.
Cigars, however, are good for you. There is even a magazine celebrating their enjoyment, with male role models, athletes, actors, rich guys with trophy wives, on its covers. Why not the surgeon general? Cigars, or course, are made of trail mix, of crushed cashews and Granola and raisins, soaked in maple syrup and dried in the sun. Why not eat one tonight at bedtime?
Firearms are also good for you. Ask Charlton Heston, who once played Moses. Gunpowder has zero fat and zero cholesterol. That goes for dumdums, too. Ask your senator or senatrix or congressperson if guns, like cigars, aren't good for you."
~
"What Uncle Alex found particularly objectionable about human beings in general was that they so seldom noticed it when they were happy."
~
"Jon Brown wears a hangman's noose for a necktie up in Heaven. I asked him about it, and he said, "Where's yours? Where's yours?""
~
I can tell this is about the time in life when something bad happens. Something really bad is going to happen, I can feel it.
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 8 March :: 2.15pm
I'm so stressed. I don't really know what else there is to say about it. I have no money, I AM getting a job, I have no time, I have lots of homework...projects to be specific. I have this huge marketing thing to due that is due on Friday, but I was too busy working on the traveling aspect of it to even start it yet. I have all this history to do too. Yikes. I am in a pit.
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 3 March :: 6.26pm
Go listen to Marzipan's new answering machine!!! hahaha.
2 bonus cups |
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 3 March :: 6.04pm
I think my friend and some presidents just flew by!!!
We're in college! We're in 8th Grade!
PUNT!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
OW! My hopes of reaching first base!!!
SAILING MISHAP!!!
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 3 March :: 5.44pm
:: Music: Thrice- Cold Cash and Colder Hearts
They are sick, They are poor, and they die by the thousands while we look away...
I am feeling pretty melancholy. My dad is being a jerk, and I'm not just saying that out of the usual "teenage angst". He thinks he is the only one who can have a long day.
I was coming home and I saw this old lady walking to her little car that was pulled over with it's hazards on. No one was stopping...I didn't even have a phone...but I felt like I needed to stop. She was really old. She said her car quit right at the worst spot of the road. She went up to this house and knocked on the door, but no one answered, which really made me mad, because their car was right in the driveway. I didn't really know what to do. She said she didn't have anyone to call. She lived in Gowen. She also said she couldn't walk far because of her little dog in the car, but I didn't really see that as the reason. So I told her I'd go to City Hall and see if they could help and I told her to stay in her car. So I went there and I told them I didn't want to just leave her alone. So they said they'd call a sherriff car for her or something. I drove back and told her and she said ok. But yeah, you know what really made me mad? No one stopped. Ever.
What happened to people? But somehow these car accidents happen with me. And I wasn't even going to go home that way today. Spur of the moment.
I just feel really exhausted. I don't know why.
My dad really pisses me off.
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 29 February :: 5.40pm
:: Music: Jimi Hendrix- If 6 Was 9
Today was really nice. Had a "family" day and for once it didn't involve fighting. Yay! Went out to eat then we went shopping. This weekend has been pretty nice. I got Jimi yesterday :-) I got all my homework done early, then I washed my car. I am going to relax the rest of the day. This is nice. And for once my puppies are cute, and not annoying me.
1 bonus cup |
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 27 February :: 3.47pm
ARGH Muckrakers!!!!
I've learned that you have to do things for yourself, not because others tell you to. And you have to do them when you're ready to.
I am overly tired right now.
P.S.- Bars are scary places for girls who just have to pee!!!
1 bonus cup |
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 27 February :: 7.06am
Last night was fun!
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 24 February :: 9.31pm
I really can't tell the future...
Ever have the lingering feeling that you know what you're doing is wrong, but you don't want to give it up?
Yeah. I know. It could be anything, I have no idea why this is such an interest. But fun is fun. And fun only lasts for so long. And once it's done, it's done.
I swear. You don't have to worry. I do have control. I love you.
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 24 February :: 1.30pm
This is so confusing!
AHHH
Other than that, things are okay-dokay. School=blah. I have about 40 minutes to do nothing...
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 20 February :: 5.16pm
:: Music: Ben Harper
My choice is what I choose to do, and if I'm causing no harm it shouldn't bother you.
You're choice is who you choose to be and if you're causing no harm then you're alright with me.
If you don't like my fire, then don't come around...
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 20 February :: 2.23pm
I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Life is okay, but then again, I'm not satisfied. I do something about it though, but it doesn't turn out. I guess I'm just getting frustrated. So I don't try as hard as I used to. I like what I do at the time, but then I look back at my life and get disgusted with it. I don't know how to explain it. It's moving, it's going somewhere, I just don't know where or what direction or how long. I guess there are a lot of questions.
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 19 February :: 2.03pm
My head hurts. Again. Last night was fun I think. My right shoulder hurts too. Argh. I wonder, does she know the things you do when she's not there? Do you care?
I feel overwhelmed right now. Last night I asked a really stupid question, I'm just waiting for the answer. But I already know the answer, I'm just waiting for someone else to say it. I don't want to come home today.
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 19 February :: 7.01am
That's the end of that.
I guess.
For now at least.
will that be ALL?
|
|
holiday
|
::
2004 11 February :: 1.43pm
You know how you get that feeling in the pit of your stomach when you think you know someone is talking to/about you. I have that right now, but I'm still not sure.
If that is the case. I wish you wouldn't hate me. I don't hate you at all. I'm sorry I wasn't direct with the way I was feeling, but it took talking to Ryan later that night to actually know. Sometimes I still don't know though. He said he was worried about me. I was depressed. I was sad because I missed you. I was sad because I could never tell my parents or anyone anything. There were other reasons. He asked me how could I trust you. I said I just knew I could. And it's true. And it was an awkward period of my life, you have to understand. I don't think I'd be upset right now if it was just some relationship. It was special. I obviously still have feelings. It wasn't your fault...of course not. It wasn't mine either though. I don't think anyone wants to hear about the past, so I won't go into detail about what was wrong with me. Just really depressed. And everyone could tell but me.
Anyways, Ryan talked to me that night.
I'm being honest. I really was honest with you. I just didn't know what was wrong. So how could I explain it if I didn't know for sure? I always told you what I knew. It did end abruptly. I never thought that was right. And I'm going to feel really dumb if you weren't even talking about what I am talking about. I wish you wouldn't hate me. If you did love me, you would have cared.
I'm sorry.
2 bonus cups |
will that be ALL?
|
|