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losttt

:: 2002 15 June :: 10.04am
:: Mood: head hurt

Fear of love
All these people are so excited to be in love. Once you tell someone you love them, where do you go from there? Well, My head hurts, so im out. <3

1 paid close attention | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 10 June :: 7.37pm
:: Music: reel big fish-beer

im at sara\'s. these girls are pretty cool, this trips been kinda lame but i\'ve got time to escape and think alot. I miss heather and all my friends, i hope everythings the same when i come back. it better be. well im going out. <3 nite

1 paid close attention | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 6 June :: 8.51am
:: Music: Thrice- To what end

Thrice concert today. :). I leave tomorrow. I'm supposedly going to come back and say "Heather who?" haha i'm only gone til next wedensday partna. I just hope my plane doesnt crash. Fuck i want a parachute. I'm not indifferent towards death anymore. I cant die..not yet. Too many things left unfelt, unsaid, undone. But i gtg and try to get a haircut. <3 sean


"You have to have rain to have a rainbow" - It's called a RAINbow, not a THUNDERbow, ashley, so your wrong.

5 paid close attention... | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 30 May :: 7.08pm
:: Mood: blah

a calm fury.
amidst a molten sky. passion grows.

wrapped within the empty cavity of life. a torch is lit.


emerging from a barren land, a celestial beauty has risen.

a culmination of beauty paints a mosaic.


a mosaic so beautiful you want to destroy it. not from boredem, disappointment, anger.

but from fear of a metamorphesis into that one word......


Love

3 paid close attention... | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 28 May :: 5.15pm
:: Mood: Exhausted/Crazy

i live to fuck a girl....to create offspring, to pass on my DNA so that my kids can do it all over again. I exist so i can stick my cock in a fucking vagina and make a kid. How worthless is this kids. well, at least it feels good anyways.

7 paid close attention... | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 19 May :: 7.39pm
:: Mood: cigarette headache

infectious beauty
so beautiful.

a smile so infectious with beauty.

you have.


<3 nite

1 paid close attention | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 18 May :: 10.48pm
:: Mood: lame as a duck







I love you

8 paid close attention... | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 18 May :: 4.20pm
:: Music: THe Gorillas

dashdashd booreed


i'm a foundation. what type of make up are you?
quiz made by muna.





things are pretty right

1 paid close attention | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 15 May :: 9.03am
:: Mood: blank



i'm a bird.

what kinda pet are you?



quiz made by muna.



hmm...could be...

4 paid close attention... | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 13 May :: 6.53am
:: Mood: emotionally retarded
:: Music: Thrice-A subtle dagger

?
hi horny heater. this whole weekend has taught me some things just arent worth my time. alot of bad shit has happened. but who cares, friday was awsome and so was the rest of this weekend. only thing leaving me sad is i miss my best friend. I don't see how other people have come between us. But whatever happens, happens i suppose, its not for me to decide what someone else wants or feels. ha the teacher just posted our grades: i got a 13% and pat has a 15% in this class. school is just a tool for my amusement now. wee. well im out. <3 bye.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Nothing is ever lost. Just some things cant be found."- me

2 paid close attention... | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 8 May :: 8.50am
:: Mood: gay as fuck
:: Music: Thrice-to awake and avenge the dead

in class and i feel like my penis is going to explode if he doesnt let me go to the bathroom
hmmm. im supposed to be doing work. im gonna go hang with pat, i just copied his disk so im all set. I finished writing your note heather. wow. parents anger me very much. my mom is being nicer, i think i get my AOL back thursday. I feel bad that your all grounded and shit heather, where as pretty much nothing happened to me. That's why you gotta start owning your parents at an early age :). I feel really bad about everything, especially this fucking ice cream shit that is gay as a catholic priest. ragh. check you email heather, im gonna go. <3 bye

see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 6 May :: 8.56am
:: Mood: hmmm
:: Music: i farted

i feel jacked up. if only you knew. the pain on my soul. well, heathers note cheered me up. and then again it sorta got to me too about something, but its ok. :) <3 heather shes awsome. I put her pic in my wallet, i'm gonna show it to my class. ra HA. i might be going insane. that's one thing i hate about looking out for everyone all the time. I often don't look out for myself. I remember when i was little, and i went to the ice cream store to meet batman. Anyways, they were giving out some free ice cream samples, and i tried one that was the best thing i had ever had. From then on I had that ice cream every chance i had, but after a few months they stopped making it. So eventually i stopped trying to get it from the store, and i found a new favorite ice cream. But still today, every ice cream store i walk into, there's always a part of me wishing i could have that ice cream once again, although a new flavor holds my intrest now. But i wonder what would have happened if they never would have stopped making that ice cream. hmm.... somthing to think about, leave a comment if you want.well i gtg, later kids. <3

5 paid close attention... | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 4 May :: 6.38pm
:: Mood: hopeful
:: Music: nuffin puffin

stufff
bubbles reflect light, images. images to be interpreted how you may percieve it, which is your right. just consider that "bubble" might be shielding the truth from you. the beauty of it is making other people think you are oblivious, when really they are themself. theres things we have yet to talk about because the chance has been taken from us. for now. damn heather i wanna say something to your mom but its too soon now. ok well i gtg, spider man is calling. my new email is s0cialdelusion@hotmail.com , any email needs to be sent to that, not any of my AOL s/n's. <3 bye

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losttt

:: 2002 26 April :: 11.42pm
:: Music: FATA-eulogy for an angel

its like the crushing blow to your ideal "perfect moment". its the forsaken message telling you the end has come. its the unseen voice destroying that moment of perfection in your life. the climax reverting to descendance. the epitomy of agony in your life. the downfall has overshadowed the climax you had once held. is it really worth the wounds etched into your soul? was your glimpse at perfection worth the depressed stupor you have now lived through day in and day out. wounds mended to, not erased or forgotten, but will be built over in their place an everlasting memorial of the one thing you cant have. an impenetrable prison.

7 paid close attention... | see beyond what is


losttt

:: 2002 24 April :: 4.12pm
:: Mood: Catatonic
:: Music: AntiFlag-culture revolution

life.
What an intruiging word. Life. Never ceasing to betrothe me. Humanity. Never failing to disgust me. I was told a eyewitness account today by a boy and what happened to him and his family. He is a Palestinian Christian living in a town occupied by Israeli soldiers. He told of how the soldiers forced themselves into his 4th month pregnant sister's apartment. and raped her. and raped her again. and when she said no more, they beat her stomach and killed her fetus. and raped her again. and when her husband tried to get them to stop, they shot him in the neck. 3 times. killing him in cold blood. and then they went to the boy's apartment. the soldiers said he should feel lucky that his mom is too ugly to be raped. then his family was forced to hand over all their money and gold so the soldiers would leave. leaving behind them was a family torn apart. for life. and this is just one of many stories. but we never any hear of this. out government is currently supporting Israel, calling all of this "a war on terror". its more like a war OF terror. there is so much more to be had in life. so many beautiful experiences this people could have had. so many dreams to live out. dreams shattered in an instant at the hands of humanity. the hitler's, mussolini's, stalin's, bin laden's, and huessein's of this world have committed far worse acts than these. and it's all for nothing. this is no life to live. humanity is the only species that thrives on killing each other. more investment is put into military expenditures then anything else. humanity is a plague. i may share physical traits with humans. but if this is humanity being shown here.....dont call me human.

2 paid close attention... | see beyond what is

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