Headache.
Today was a much better day, and it will proceed to get better I am sure. Indeed.


Ow. Headache.

I almost feel sorry for what I'm gonna do. And your hair smells of smoke. Who will cast the first stone?
(Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these, so I sat alone and waited out the night. The best part of what has happened was the part I must have missed.
So I'm asking you to shine it on and stick around. I'm not writing my goodbyes.)




Yeah. So...interesting...

Cause you can't keep a secret when it never was a secret to start. (You could at least pretend you didn't want to get caught).
'~'*'~'*'~'*'~'*'~'*'~'
So let it go. This is the grace only we can bestow. This is the price you pay for loss of control. This is the break in the bend. This is the closest of calls. This is the reason you're alone. This is the rise and the fall.
'~'*'~'*'~'*'~'*'~'*'~'

The fever. The focus. The reasons I had to believe you weren't too hard to sell. Die young and save yourself.
The tickle. The taste of...
It used to be the reason I breathed but now it's choking me up. Die young and save yourself.


Up the stairs: The station where the act becomes the art of growing up.

Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these...
I feel...unhappy and unwanted. And at times like these I'm wishing I had something to drown these emotions. They yell at me for things they did. And it sounds awful, but I can't wait till this weekend so I can finally drown these things with a new habit. Because I'm certain that's the kind of person I am and that is how it will turn out. At least I have something to depend on.


Maybe I'm wrong...?
But right now it just seems right.

Now it seems happiness is unattainable
Today was an awful day. I'm not even going to go into what happened this morning. But when I got to school a lot of people were mad or in bad moods. I didn't feel like getting yelled at by other people, it made me angry. And I was trying to cheer them up. And then I talked to my friend and it just felt different. Maybe it was because it was a bad day, but I felt like I hadn't talked to them in forever, it just felt different. And I feel bad because I told him "You're acting different", when in all actuality, it was me, and not them, and I should have asked him if he was having a good day or not. I should have given him a hug instead. But yeah, so if you're reading this Ryan, sorry bud. Hopefully we can talk soon. I was the one acting weird. Today has SUCKED!
And I'm so sick of being yelled at.

Yeah. So. I'm not regretting anything. I love life. There are some people/things that I miss and it seems like those things are unattainable now. Stuff. Yeah. So... You know that feeling when you are content but not completely...that's what I feel like right now. But, life is very good right now. I just hope I don't screw up too much.

Hey you know what? Last night was awesome! Thank you Robby. Celebration on the Grand was fun. Covering tony up with grass. hahaha. Braden is a cool kid. Cauterize, I liked them. And I love Story of the Year. And I love Fat Balls. Ever have one of those? I didn't know they made them, but hey, they're good. My grandma makes something like them, but she calls them Cream Puffs. I told the guy he must've taken that idea from her. haha. But anyway, last night was a blast. Jess spent the night and it was fun. :-)