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May I cut in?

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:: 2003 18 August :: 11.49 pm

People are weird.

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:: 2003 18 August :: 11.11 pm
:: Music: AFI

I need more motivation to get up early. . .

Any ideas?

5 -finally spoke up | Say something!


:: 2003 18 August :: 6.10 pm

Time flies when you don't notice it.

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:: 2003 18 August :: 1.19 am
:: Music: Slick Shoes- Now's The Time

That was all so long ago. I don't know how to feel. Sad.

I'm going to bed.

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:: 2003 17 August :: 9.56 pm
:: Music: Easily-RHCP

Let's get married today
So...things feel good now. Things are good. Yes yes. Hm...Let's see if I can remember my schedule...

1-KCTC
2-KCTC
3-English 4- eilola
4-Trig/Pre-calc- Babbitt
5-AP History- Norkus
6-KCTC LEAVE

Haha. Yes, yes yes. I get only 3 classes this year. And it will feel good. Indeed. Hm. I may have gotten 4th/5th hour mixed up, but for the most part...that is all.

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:: 2003 16 August :: 12.03 am

So...I take it, friends do this. I've moved on, I'd like to say that "I don't care", but if I say "I don't feel like talking"...

It probably means I haven't.
I have nothing to say. And I really don't feel like talking. And that is why I just want to forget.

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:: 2003 14 August :: 1.08 am
:: Music: Brand New

When I'm talking to myself I'd always rather be talking to you...
"A good addiction takes the guesswork out of death"

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:: 2003 14 August :: 12.34 am
:: Music: A Perfect Circle- Mer de Noms

Sea Of Names.
i'd rather be a mystery.

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:: 2003 13 August :: 3.47 pm
:: Music: Armor For Sleep-Dream To Make Believe

maybe i'll be paper or books thrown on your floor...move me when you want to...i'll live where you put me...
~~~~
Ah so...sleep is good. And I would say I need more of it...but I sleep all my days away as it is. Bored bored bored.

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:: 2003 13 August :: 1.25 am
:: Music: Someday i

I wish I could hang out with people I chose. Go back in time or something so I could not lose contact. My back hurts. Tomorrow is summer orientation. I was supposed to go to the record shop too...but plans have been canceled due to a large cold front coming in.

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:: 2003 12 August :: 11.00 pm

"Raise high monolithic statues so fragile. As they fall, I am ever enthralled. Gaze, lie and smirk in time. Your arrogance will suit you well 'til fashion is dispelled. As waves of plastic fame go out of fashion, you're going out forever unknown. These waves of plastic fame are drying up and I smile because you're dying to become unknown. From above a rain of ashes descends. Anathema I will remain, forever will remain. From below, in my seclusion, look up to the sky to see paper wings and watch them burn. Without habitation. You'll never find a soul inside, no life, but nothing's died. No lights, but quite the show (just as long as no one every knows...all motion is pantomime.) Dancing in the rain of descending ash, dancing on your grave, I'll see you all falling. Dancing in the rain of descending ash, dancing in your dust. I'll see you all falling. I'd stop it, had you a heart."

And that is only a small part of why I love them.

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:: 2003 12 August :: 9.47 pm

This whole world has been sucked in, I swear. They're wearing this trenchcoat that covers their superficiality and causes them to go around talking about how "non-judgemental" they are. When really all they think about is what you wear. Or what you look like. And it fucking sucks. Because people could have a lot better relationship with each other if they just realized that everyone is going to get old and die and no amount of money or plastic surgery is going to prevent their death one day. And they can't take that back. Imagine all your memories being based on what you wore or the famous people you knew or how pretty you were when you were younger. While people who don't care are out there having fun. When you're old and dying how are you going to prove to your grandkids how pretty you used to be and all those expensive clothes you used to wear. All that money you've wasted trying to fit in. Those clothes won't fit anymore, and stupid things go out of style and you'll be left behind. While the lucky ones are spending time on memories.
People suck. Guys suck. He said I was "Cute, but not beautiful like her." I'm through with it all. Mom just came in trying to apologize. She blamed what she said on this stuff the lady put in her hair. She said she was feeling "dizzy". Yeah. Thanks for loving me mom.
I guess I'm just not having a very good day.

4 -finally spoke up | Say something!


:: 2003 12 August :: 4.38 pm
:: Music: Guster-Amsterdam

Ugh.
So, all you fans out there of Steve Burns. Yes, you know...that Blues Clues guy, Steve. (hah. yeah.....)Everyone says he died of an OD. Do you know what really became of him? I didn't until today. Who would've guessed he had an indie-rock band with the help of The Flaming Lips. Hm. I thought that was interesting...
~~~~~~~~
I need something happy and exciting in my life.

"Besides, at some point, the Mommy used to say, your memories, your stories and adventures, will be the only things you'll have left."

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:: 2003 10 August :: 9.17 pm
:: Music: Elliot- Carving Oswego

I like watermelon.

I like this song too.

```````````````
Volcano eyes that keep me warm i turn for heat- but i wake to no one there. so you've traced my number... so you've gathered it all up. so you're catching up to me. tracing on the line that made me free.


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:: 2003 10 August :: 11.10 am
:: Music: NOFX...again. haha

I don't understand why you beg for forgiveness, just before you do it again.
So...I've been on a NOFX binge lately. haha
Yesterday I went out with my mom and grandma. We went to Mongolian BBQ and then to Horrocks. Blah blah blah. It was fun. Then I went to work for a while. If I said it was boring, it would imply that I didn't do anything...but I did a LOT. So, as far as labor goes, it was boring. Boring boring boring. Then after I got home I called Casey. Twas not home. Then she called me and came over for a while. Then we left to make plans because the boys were being really stupid. Our plans? Great Day...Subway...haha. Then we went over to their house. It was later found out that they had talked to my mom. They do care! We just hung out there for a while...Often talking about Floyd. Man, he's so cool. :-P And I guess that's that. But Casey dear, I have a lot of fun with ya. Hopefully this week we can actually go bowling!

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