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2004 22 September :: 11.10 pm
:: Mood: cranky
:: Music: behind blue eyes
craaaAzy day
yoo.. well this week hasnt been a good one. yesterday was moms 2month like i said in my last entry, and tomorrow is her birthday. its going to be a really hard day for me.
today was absolutely horrible. it truly was lol. its a long story, so im going to leave out some details.
well, i get off the bus today and start walking home, im not even walking for two minutes and this groub of holy cross kids [holy cross is a catholic all boys school] anyways, so this black car pulls up and its a red light, and theres like 4 holy cross seniors in the car. anyways, so i keep walking and they start screaming out of their car "hey baby, hey sweetie, yo sexy, you know ur smiliing over there, come here princess" so i just keep looking the other way and the car drives off cuz its a green light. meanwhile all the other holy cross kids are behind me at the bus stop and i look like a fool.
so, i think thats the end of the holy cross pervs in the black car. next thing i know, a few blocks later, this black car comes racing next to me going at least 40mph, and all of a sudden they see me, and at the next corner they make a sharp ass right turn their car makes the loudest screechign sound ive ever heard in my life, and they appear in front of me by the time i get to the end of the block. they start talking again, but i called my cousin so i had an excuse not to talk to them. it was really creepy.
this kid held my books today when i was walking to class, and everybody stared at us like we were going out, i was like nooo noo Big G is suposed to be doing this, lol. but he woudlnt give my books back til we went dif ways, i mean it was nice, but im not interested in him, how do you tell someone ur not interesed in a nice way? anybody.. advice?
and im so fuckin pissed, b/c Big G's friend his hittin on me and its not supposed to be like that, its supposed to be the other way around. its fuckin frustrating. even a friendship w/ g is good enough, but nothing is just killing me. we dont talk in class cuz our seats are so far and i only said hey to him today b/c i saw him in the hall. he talked to me first, he sparked up convo and he needs to keep that shit going. how come NOTHING ever goes my way?? its the only thing i want, and i cant even get it. id love to be his girlfriend, but i mean, im beggin for friendship!!
but anyways, i dont wanna write anymore so im gonna get going. laterrr
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2004 21 September :: 11.23 pm
today was the 2month anniversary
not such a great thing to celebrate tho.
better update tomorrow
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2004 19 September :: 9.51 pm
:: Music: emmys
wedding // whits bday!!!
yealo. well i wont make this entry a long one. my aunts weddin was on saturday, that was freaking fun. i danced my ass off lol. white girl style lol carly and serious. then we got that country music on.. u know heath mich and wick lol. [save a horse ride a cowboy] then we were gonna play meatloaf lol aunt pat. my feet are still sore from all the dancing.
school tomorrow... which means i wake up at 5 a fuckin clock. at least i get to see a few people.. wink wink nudge nudge. lolol
by the way. this is a special shout out to my WHITTTNEYYY!! happy birthday girl. i know im early, but i didnt know if id be online tomorrow or not. also carly wtf do u want for ur bday!?! and wick. lemme know wat u want to. itll be late, but itll be there!!
speaking of bdays, moms and aunt lees is on thursday, mines coming up soon!! melll come visit meeee! lol but i guess im gonna get going cuz i gotta get up early. love and miss you alll..
colt -- wish i coulda been there n jess.. im writing u back now!! xoxox
rip mom. i love you soooo much. u dont evne know how much i miss you and how much im hurting. please help me to carry on and be a strong person.
love and miss all of you floridians!! ill try to be home soon. please dont forget me!! xoxxo <33
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2004 16 September :: 11.26 pm
:: Music: talking to carly
schooool
hiii! today was my cousins birthday. happy seventeeth birthday paul!
in other news, started school on monday. what a bummer. my first class is at 720 in the morning, meaning i have to get up at 515, and leave my house by 615 to catch the bus by 635. i get outta school at 148 and get home at like 248. craazy right? yea, it is, -- but get this? freshmans and sophomores get out at 5:oo. thats freaking insane.
schedule is as follows ::
1st hr - earth science .... first of all, teacher is a biiitch .. i took that in 8th grade, so im taking it again b/c i need to take a regent for it. blah blah blah. at least my aunt is a earthscience teacher and can help me if i get lost
2nd hr - volleyball .... yea, i like volleyball - but i suck at it, what an embarassment, whatever tho, the teacher rocks my socks.
3rd hr - english honors .. so far so good i guess. so far we've had 2 essays, but the teacher seems nice.
4th hr - global studies .. teacher is so fuckin awesome its not even funny, she's probably my favorite teacher. so far so good in the class, the teach is realllly nice and seems like fun.
5th hr - on mondays i have lab, and tuesday thru friday i have lunch. lab sucks, i have it w/ my science teacher. fuckin wench. lunch is fun, since i dont know anybody i dont eat or sit with anyone, so i work for this guy in the lunchroom and get community service hours. whatever, at least im not twiddling my thumbs.
6th hr - math, easy shit, whatever, i wont complain
7th hr - omg my favorite freaking class lol, i wake up in the morning looking forward to this class its craaazy lol. kickass teacher, and its government, a senior class.. but whaterver im not complaining. i like it .. i like it a lot. omg the freaking hottest guy everrr is in that class and on the first day of school he talked to me!! woohoo the first person in the school to really talk to me, and damn was he hot lol. ill get into the story later.
8th hr - spanish, took it already, but whatever. kids in the class are pretty cool.
anyways, back to government. so yea, the first day of school theres this hot fuckin kid sittin down and so i walk into class and sit like two seats away and up. this other cute kid walks into class and sits behind me and next to the hot kid. the hot kid [jay for short] talks to me. we take attendance and him and his two friends just start talking to me and asking me questions and he really is just so fuckin gorgeous.. thats what he is, he is gorgeous. fuckin orgasmic. so anwyays, we really started talking and then i saw him in the hall and he said hey to me, he talks first which puts a smile on my face lol hey i aint gonna lie. but now in the class we have assigned seats and hes all the way on the other side of the classroom which sucks ass but on wed. jays friend [the cute one] screamed from across the classroom "hey florida" lol and i waved back, and then jays other friend simon staretd talkin to me a lot b/c he sits next to me soo hopefully we all chill sometime. but nothin really ever works out in my favor, but i can always hope. hes just soo hot i cant get over it hah. i just hope i dont get transferred outta that class lol.
other than that, life sucks, im not aloud to come to fl for my bday or for the summer b/c my family hates me. home life hasnt gotten much better. my moms bday is coming up ... idk what im gonna doo. aunts wedding is saturday, im not in the mood for celebration. im tired of crying. i want a boyfriend.
i feel like by the time i get backto florida, nobody will be my friend anymore, cept carly and maybe a select other few. i hate it. i hate my life. i do. really the only thing i look forward to is the hot guy at seventh hour lol. how pathetic is that. not like ill ever have a chance with that one either lol.
hell just be another landis another mike d another frank another danny another whoeeeeeeeever who i didnt get when i wanted them. whatever, life cant get much worse anyways. but i guess ill go finish talking to carly and then go to bed and dream about jay hahahaha. jk jk. i love and miss you all.
mel call me asap. and i have more shit i could write, but i gotta get up early.
later! xoxox --- i love you mom!
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2004 11 September :: 11.32 pm
redid the layout...
im a nervous wreck--
.... today was not one of my good days
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2004 10 September :: 12.18 am
:: Mood: depressed
:: Music: jojo - leave get out
labor day weekend
well. i actually had a good weekend. i feel extremely guilty about it, but i had a good weekend.
saturday - around 9am me aunt lee and john left to go to my uncle gino's and aunt dee's in shirley, long island. we got there and my cousin toniann who lives in florida was there!! i was so happy to see her, so we basically just hung out by the pool. everyone had a few mudslides and stuff. robbie and joey showed up too which was really fun. that night the parents played poker and us kids just hung out, then we all sung karaoke together. that was a lot of fun, thats the most fun i have with my family, come to think of it, they're prob my fave part of my family. when im wiht them i have a good time, we're sooo crazzy. we're nuts and we're idiots, but we have fun. karaoke is soooo hilarious .. it really is.
sunday - we woke up semi early, me aunt lee toniann and aunt dee all went to mandees and did some shopping, then we came back and my other cousin from florida - gina and her husband and three kids were there. it was so freaking cool. anyways, we all hung out that day a lot. robert uncle tony and aunt menia showed up, which was cool. that night we all did karaoke again, we were doing so good, my cousin robert was singing man i feel like a woman with me, his father looked at him in disappointment haha. we played spades, me and toniann ran that shit against robbie and jimmy. then jimmy hit a squirrel with a freaking tennis racket and almost killed it. it was nuts. everyone had more mudslides and pina coladas. got a lot of sun again, oh and we had a republican convention and then talked about scott peterson and michael jackson, and just had this huge convention w/ all these microphones .. it was maadd funny. then my aunt whipped out the leis and hats and maraca's and we all karaoked and danced til like 3am. the neighbors must hate us haha. it felt like new years. only not as good.. haha right carly!!
monday - labor day!!! uhm lets see, we layed out in the sun AGAIN. lol i got so much sun. then parents played poker again, everyone whipped out the mudslides. around lunch time john and aunt lee left, i stayed. i went with toniann to franks house, we got coldstone icecream, then we went back to tonianns.
tuesday - woke up early, hung around, didnt do much really, around 12 toniann and i and the kids went to aunt patties and uncle joes. robbie and joey were at school, so we didnt see them til around 2ish. i finally successfully pushed robbie in the pool -- i was so proud haha. then toniann frank and i including their dog sophie all went to gramma's and ate dinner there, slept over, the dog pissed in my grams bed, she got pissed lol. then my cousin drove back to fl, driving right into a flood -- smart girl right
and lately i havnet been doing much, i got my hair highlighted a LOT today, its nice and i got a lil cut. nothing big i guess. but i gotta go, im talking to jimmy and i gotta try to make carly a s/n. i miss you alllll UPDATE BIATCHES
mommy.. i miss you more than you will ever know!! xoxo
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2004 4 September :: 12.04 am
:: Music: freak a leak - petey pablo
CARLYS MY MONKEY LOSER HAHA [IJ]
hidey ho guys. well im in a semi-ok mood b/c i just got off the phone with carly. talking to her always brightens my day.
on another note, heather and john sorry i mised your calls. ill call back asap. please be safe!!
well in the morning i leave for my uncle gino's. in case nobody remembers .. robbie and joey [my cousins-sorta] live there and theyr'e really cool. they're friends louie and mario also live there, louie and i sorta had this connection thing, but thats overwith, idk if im even gonna see him, but i hope i see them all.
i won two bucks today with lotto. lol whatta win! ill be back from my uncles on monday. so hopefully my cousins and volleyball and stuff will get my mind off all the other bad stuff.. i sure hope so because i cant stand thinking about all this stuff much longer.
landis -- i havent talked to my dad yet about the party thing for our birthdays but ill let u know asap.
mel -- once i know whether or not im coming or ur going ill let u know and try to look for cheap tickets. i love you girl.
and the rest of you -- EMAIL ME!! lol
i talked to justin yesterday -- hes doing good. not with jessica anymore. he likes boca and hes in the process of writing me back.
ya know, im feeeling reallly dependant lately. i really want a boyfriend and im thinking back on all these oppurtunities i had and how the guys i really liked ..... didnt like me back. i cant think of one person who i liked that was willing to give me a shot.. i really need to find out wtf's wrong w/ me!
but anyways, im talking to carly and i wanna try to find some tickets for ny/fl. one love! [haha was that ghetto? huh huh? ]
ps. looooooooooove you patrick! cant wait to play spades haha .
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