Tonight I learned to get the facts before I rant and rave about something. I don't want to stoop to low levels like that. Regina talked to me tonight. I was still kind of pissed about things I was hearing, but she straightened some things out for me. Still, I think it will take a while for us to be friends again. Just some good advice: don't let friends date! lol!

I'm happy today. I got a free CD from tremor with a lot of great songs. Tremor is like this group that surveys teens for their ideas on products and whatnot. I think I can almost sing my "Song of Love" and I'm one step away from having my lines memorized (hopefully). Oh yeah, so who wants to go to prom with me? lol

Best day in the world
HOLY SHIT...tonight was wild! Driving Emily home, i got pulled over by cop. I was scared as hell because 1) I was speeding 2) I was driving past midnight 3) the cop said one of my headlights was out 4) I couldn't find a recent proof of insurance! The cop was nice though and he just gave me a warning. That's not all that happened today though. Heading back from the mall, some cars (including me) must've hit a patch of black ice and we all went spinning out of control on the highway. I ended up facing the oncomming traffic, which was fortunate compared to other cars that were banged up pretty badly! I went to play practice afterwards. It's finally starting to hit me that I'm going to be up there in the spotlight...and I'm scared! Well, I gotta do what I gotta do! right? I finally called it quits with Regina tonight also. I believe that our relationship got to a point where it was just going on and on and nothing was happening between us. If we can still be friends, though, that's cool. But I know that I want to be single for a while. But it wouldn't hurt to get some benefits every now and then from a certain someone! lol

week to week seems like forever
Tonight, the dance was fun. I wish I would have arrived earlier though. Oh well...At least "Bob" knows what he has to do this weekend. Emily wants me to "make up my mind" by tomorrow. I want to say yes, but I'm shy and indecisive. One thing at a time...

Sitting in the same place for over an hour, my feelings went from depressed to slightly hopeful. Isn't the emotional rollar coaster fun? Hop on! Yeah...I just gotta sort things out in my head. I think tomorrow will help, but it could actually make things worse. Should I go for what I got or look for something better? FWB is ingriguiging, and I believe in proper fidelity. One thing at a time...

Confidence Justin, Confidence
Well...tonight sucked. My voice was horrible and I can't sing. According to Jami, I'm fat, dirty, and unpopular! Lol - mostly the truth...I don't really think I'm "dirty."

There's a song where the guy sings "we had a falling out." Right now, I kind of feel like that. I haven't talked to her all week, and it seemed like she's been blowing me off, probably what I've been doing to her lately. I'm just not sure of things anymore. I don't really want a commitment unless there's something really there. I think I still have some work to do before I know what kind of person I am and what I'm all about. I don't know why i let things get to me. I wish I didn't give a damn...but I do.

Tonight I realized that as much as I've dreamed about being the top dog, I'm more comfortable just blending in the background with everyone else. Maybe my perspectives will change after March. This is my chance to prove myself to others, and most importantly...prove myself to myself.

Exam Day 3: Okay
I took Gov/Econ exam today. It was 20 pages!!! First half was easy, second half went downhill. I need an 81 percent or higher to keep an A in that class. Supposedly I got 93% on chemistry, according to Sarah Gates. Well I'm going sledding. Later.

Enjoy it while it lasts
I have waited for a feeling like this, and now I have it. Everything seems to be falling into place. I am excited about my part in the play (though I'm also scared). I did pretty well at bowling. I'm a member of NHS. I'm gonna be on the National Honor Roll (if that means anything) After the play I'm going to sign up for soccer. And this summer I'm going to Europe. Next week (exams) will probably kill me. But I'm happy now, so I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts.

Well, I got the part. The one and only Prince Dauntless. It's ironic, considering in my 4th grade rendition of Puss in Boots I was the Prince. Even weirder, Nick gave me a card on my birthday with things to do when you turn 17. One of those things was get a lead in the play and have to kiss alexa. Oddly enough, she's the Princess! How weird is that? You know, people keep asking me if I'm excited or if I'm shocked. I dont really feel anything right now. It'll probably take a while to set it.

Okay, so I'm half falling asleep. I can't seem to keep my right eyelid open! I still have 40 government questions to answer. Damn! Maybe a shower will wake me up. So...all will be revealed tomorrow.

I guess I'm not out of the game afterall. After school today, I got a callback for Prince Dauntless. Remember a few months ago when they first announced the play and I said I was going to be the Prince? Well...I actually have a chance! Tonight's callback auditions went pretty well. It's between me and this freshmen. He's shorter than me (that might be an advantage?) but he's also a good actor. Well I'm hot and hungary... so 'nite everyone!