I am going to become a GD Social Worker
i think that things will be okay now. i will leave some air- not that i have a choice- for awhile and hopefully things will sort out. i don't know what it is that makes me care about you guys, but even when i am mad at you i have to make sure you are doing great.

falala. the nice thing is that i don't have to think about me.

Anorexia
*I fuck you to make the pain go away*

well after crying myself to sleep i awake at 9 to be asked if i would like to work today. as you can tell i am still here so, no.
Anyways the resolve is that i cried acid tears that burnished my memory of last night and although i faintly remember things i will still be your friend because i have few enough people who care as is. however don't try to be touchy because i don't want to feel your warmth or hang out for hours like i had been.

I am Jaded and that is why i can face this so quickly. Oh and the pain won't go away because i am going to turn into a waif.

maybe you are right, but it was mostly my fault.

i can't tell you that a friendship will be definite or that i will ever come over again, i made sure i can't call you though. and hopefully i will have let this be my last mistake.

I am a moron
White Flag

I know you think that I shouldn't still love you or tell you that.
But if I didn't say it well I'd still have felt it,
where's the sense in that
I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were but

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

I know I left too much mess and destruction to come back again
And I caused but nothing but trouble,
I understand if you can't talk to me again
And if you live by the rules of "it's over" then I'm sure that that makes sense but

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

And when we meet, which I'm sure we will
All that was there, will be there still
I'll let it pass, and hold my tongue
And you will think, that I've moved on....

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

who are you?
where did you come from?
Are you listening to me?
what do you wanna do with with your life?

LOL

Lyrics to the above mentioned song:

Born with the moon in Cancer
Choose her a name she will answer to
Call her green and the winters cannot fade her
Call her green for the children who've made her
Little green, be a gypsy dancer

He went to California
Hearing that everything's warmer there
So you write him a letter and say, "Her eyes are blue."
He sends you a poem and she's lost to you
Little green, he's a non-conformer

CH0RUS:

Just a little green
Like the color when the spring is born
There'll be crocuses to bring to school tomorrow
Just a little green
Like the nights when the Northern lights perform
There'll be icicles and birthday clothes
And sometimes there'll be sorrow

Child with a child pretending
Weary of lies you are sending home
So you sign all the papers in the family name
You're sad and you're sorry, but you're not ashamed
Little green, have a happy ending

CHORUS:

Just a little green
Like the color when the spring is born
There'll be crocuses to bring to school tomorrow
Just a little green
Like the nights when the Northern lights perform
There'll be icicles and birthday clothes
And sometimes there'll be sorrow
____________________________________

my interpretation could be worng but from what i can tell they give the girl up for adoption because neither parent wants her. When i was little my dad said that this was my song and only now do i understand why.

To the Friends:
I don't know where life sits at the moment. i am grounded for the next couple days at least until my parents figure out a schedual that involves me coming home.

Right now my dad wants to kick me out and is throwing around his psyco babble once again.

my life with the boy is confusing and i feel not so happy as i have been because i am not sure that how i feel is how he feels, but i have alot of problems so i am willing to accept that.

justin is trying to get me to eat more because i haven't been eating that much, but i think i will be eating less now. Anyways i have to work in an hour so i need to go get ready.
hugs and kisses, hopes to make it through the day.

SPORK!!! BWAHAHAHA

You have a surprise kiss! Your partner is always
pleasantly pleased to have you jump outta no
where to dote them with a fun peck on the cheek
or more passionate embrace. super markets and
work places are your favorite places to attack
your loved one with all your love =p


What kind of kiss are you?
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you are the cute but psycho happy bunny. You
adorable, but a little out there. It's alright,
you might not have it all, but there are worse


which happy bunny are you?
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bubble bubble--- POP!
i want to explode, i have so much to say but i don't want to rush things so i can't say it and i had an extremely weird dream last night.

hmmm...

so you remember what i said about being happy and having something to live for, well as of 3 am and other events that occured this morning i am pretty sure that i would rather be dead