jedibumblebee
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2021 15 October :: 3.46pm
:: Music: Olivia Rodrigo- brutal
They say these are the golden years/ But I wish I could disappear/ Ego crush is so severe/ God, it's brutal out here...
I want it to be, like, messy
I'm so insecure, I think
That I'll die before I drink
And I'm so caught up in the news
Of who likes me and who hates you
And I'm so tired that I might
Quit my job, start a new life
And they'd all be so disappointed
'Cause who am I, if not exploited?
And I'm so sick of 17
Where's my fucking teenage dream?
If someone tells me one more time
"Enjoy your youth, " I'm gonna cry
And I don't stick up for myself
I'm anxious and nothing can help
And I wish I'd done this before
And I wish people liked me more
All I did was try my best
This the kind of thanks I get?
Unrelentlessly upset (ah, ah, ah)
They say these are the golden years
But I wish I could disappear
Ego crush is so severe
God, it's brutal out here
(Yeah!)
I feel like no one wants me
And I hate the way I'm perceived
I only have two real friends
And lately, I'm a nervous wreck
'Cause I love people I don't like
And I hate every song I write
And I'm not cool and I'm not smart
And I can't even parallel park
All I did was try my best
This the kind of thanks I get?
Unrelentlessly upset (ah, ah, ah)
They say these are the golden years
But I wish I could disappear
Ego crush is so severe
God, it's brutal out here
(Yeah! Just having a really good time)
Got a broken ego, broken heart
(It's brutal out here, it's brutal out here)
And God, I don't even know where to start
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godessalthena
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2021 21 September :: 10.35am
another rejection.
we get what we deserve.
trash deserves to be burned
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godessalthena
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2021 20 September :: 1.26pm
I just want to hear back about this job
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jedibumblebee
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2021 10 September :: 9.45pm
:: Music: The Killers- All The Things That I've Done
I am so much older than I can take...
When there's nowhere else to run
Is there room for one more son
One more son
If you can hold on
If you can hold on, hold on
I want to stand up, I want to let go
You know, you know, no you don't, you don't
I want to shine on in the hearts of men
I want a meaning from the back of my broken hand
Another head aches, another heart breaks
I am so much older than I can take
And my affection, well it comes and goes
I need direction to perfection, no no no no
Help me out, yeah
You know you got to help me out, yeah
Oh don't you put me on the backburner
You know you got to help me out, yeah
And when there's nowhere else to run
Is there room for one more son
These changes ain't changing me
The cold hearted boy I used to be
Yeah, you know you got to help me out
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the backburner
You know you got to help me out, yeah
You're gonna bring yourself down, yeah
You're gonna bring yourself down, yeah
You're gonna bring yourself down
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
(Time, truth and hearts)
Yeah, you know you got to help me out
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the backburner
You know you got to help me out, yeah
You're gonna bring yourself down, yeah
You're gonna bring yourself down, yeah
Oh don't you put me on the backburner
You're gonna bring yourself down, yeah
You're gonna bring yourself down
Over and in, last call for sin
While everyone's lost, the battle is won
With all these things that I've done
All these things that I've done
(Time, truth and hearts)
If you can hold on
If you can hold on
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godessalthena
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2021 29 August :: 12.45pm
:: Music: sleep
an open letter to the people in my life
spinning in place, hurdling thru eternity, being painfully aware of the absurdity of life, and consciousness..
I'm thankful I'm on my journey with the people I am. even if we haven't actually met. it means so much that you all joined me at one time or another. if you're still with me or we've had to say good bye... you changed my course, and I'm grateful we touched each other in some way.
life is so precious, and fleeting, and absurd, painful, frustrating, beautiful, ephemeral... I know I'm ungrateful and thankless often, but I do appreciate the little time I had on this planet, and all the people who have made it possible.
sincerely - thank you
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