bacardi
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2005 19 April :: 8.38am
:: Music: Atreyu
awkward
wow, so last night was my first day working my new job (right now i am at my other job), monday nights is when bowling is the cheapest and beers are only 1$ so it draws the attention of the younger crowd. anyway so im standing there last night and all of a sudden my ex walks in. it really freaked me out because its the first time that i have seen her since we broke up almost 6 months ago, and we were together for almost 4 years, so its not like is was some b.s. relationship. now obviously i still have some kind of feelings for her but that doesn't mean i am pining for her and wanting her back or anything. Anyway strange.
7 Bridges burned.#FFFFFF |
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bacardi
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2005 17 April :: 8.38pm
bts
well i guess im doing pretty good. i talked to my ex this last weekend for the first time since we broke up, and i was unaffected. i mean i was trying to stay away from her because i thought i would start to feel wierd but i didn't so thats good. i'm not gonna go outta my way to talk to her but i will talk if she brings something up i guess.
anyway this weekend we saw before the storm and they were pretty bad ass, i loved it!
2 Bridges burned.#FFFFFF |
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spacietraci
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2005 17 April :: 10.25pm
just another day
well its kinda been awhile, but things really havent changed, i was supposed to see ron today but he never called me and i was busy anyways with my mom's birthday!!!! Happy Birthday MOM~
i started thinking the other day yes i know thats kinda scary but anyways that i havent talk to my future ex husband at all, we go like 3 day siwth talking to one another and then like 6 weeks with out talkin its really weird but im worried about him since its getting nice out and he has his bike, not to good mixtures,
Hey Kane, i guesss were going camping next weekend even though i have to work till 2, Nikki really wants to go so i guess we might be campin in josh's back yard, dont ask.... lol
alright back to working on my speech before josh yells at me... lol
1 Bridges burned. |
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spacietraci
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2005 13 April :: 9.51pm
:: Mood: excited
im soo excited courtney my bestiest frined from work had her baby girl today :) 6lbs 12oz a baby girl, named madeline jane, im soo happy for you court i cant wait to see her. congratulations to you, madeline, and of course matthew:) i love all of you guys, i was just surprised that i was one of the first people to know and actually get to talk to courtney that made me feel special.
Josh and i got are grill but i am unsure about if we are allowed to have it on the third floor oh well i guesss, what can they do????? so hopefully we will start cooking or something who knwos about that one
well i have to go to the high school tomrorow to get some more hours in for my final since thats do in like 2 or 3 weeks im not sure but its getting there especially since we only have lik what 4 weeks left if that. i still have to do my speech on my artfacits i shold be able to do that on monday i hope soo because if she doesnt allow it i wont pass the classsss. sooooo i am reallly hoping sooo.
well im just going to chill for or well relax alittle bit before josh gets him so i will talk to you alll later..
loves
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bacardi
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2005 13 April :: 11.29am
:: Music: Mr. Brightside - The Killers
Coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this?
It was only a kiss,
It was only a kiss.
Now I'm falling asleep,
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke,
And she's taking a drag
Then they go into bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head,
But she's touching his chest now
He takes off her dress now
Let me go
I just can't look,
It's killing me
And taking control
Jealousy - turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibi
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
'Cos I'm Mr. Brightside
1 Bridges burned. |
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spacietraci
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2005 12 April :: 2.10pm
:: Mood: irritated
wellll what a night last night was, sitting at home when the phone rings and its FRANK wondering if i wanted to so something, so i figured why not, for some reason i can never say no, so he came and got me and we went back to his house on Gull Lake yeah his mom is living on Gull lake now very interesting but i am glad for her :) so we kinda just chillied and talked about things like things from 5 years ago, his mom just happend to be going thought things and got out like all the pictures of him and i and think that we had done and what not.. the old memories. we watched spider man 2, it was alright the first one was soo much better though.. and then he brought me back since i had to be home before 2, yeah i know it was a curfew i was given and yes i did make it home by 2. and i behaved...
So today hasnt been the greatest day cause well josh is pissed i went out with and ex, and he tries not to be but you can tell just by how he act and even looks. sometimes it seems like he doesnt want me to do anything with out him... almost like he doesnt trust me... and if i say something its welll look how we hooked up...who knows but you have to give me credit that i told him before i left and what not... but i know it ju st made him worry at work and what not... what kkind of girlfriend am i????/ alright i just thought i would post something so kane could read since i didnt two way her back th is morning to tell her my story.. sorry girl but i have to get this speech thing done
1 Bridges burned. |
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bacardi
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2005 12 April :: 9.36am
:: Music: Linkin Park - Meteroa
"Don't stay
Forget our memories
Forget our possibilities
What you were changing me into
Just give me myself back and
Don't stay
Forget our memories
Forget our possibilities
Take all your faithlessness with you
Just give me myself back and
Don't stay
Sometimes I feel like I trusted you too well
Sometimes I just feel like screaming at myself
Sometimes I'm in disbelief, I didn't know
Somehow I need to be alone"
"The very worst part of you
The very worst part of you
Is me"
"I know I'll never trust a single thing you say
You knew your lies would divide us
But you lied anyway
And all the lies have got you floating
Up above us all
But what goes up has got to fall"
"It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone"
"I can't feel the way I did before
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Time won't heal this damage anymore
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored"
"I've
Become so numb
I can't feel you there
Become so tired
So much more aware
I'm becoming this
All I want to do
Is be more like me
And be less like you
But I know
I may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me
With someone disappointed in you"
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