you'll never be what I need
:-[ I dont know

I love him but I'm scared to give in to something thats just gonna crash down in weeks and leave me alone & hurt..

some say it's easy to believe someone when they are telling you exactly what you wanna hear.. well that only works the first time around. when you hear the same thing everytime.. it gets hard to believe its true.. and in 5 days it will be one year....

one year of trying too hard and holding onto something that was never there...
he was never there when I needed him... he only came when he wanted and left when things got bad

but he always came back to me.. and that's what made me hold on for so long. and everytime he returned it seemed he was more and more convinced he loved me.. now its been a year and I don't know what to do.. some say if you love with him then its worth any time you are able to be with him even if it does hurt.. and some say dont bother even for that short period of happyness..

I'm one of the people who believes you should take every chance at happyness you get.. because you only live ones and it's the times you were happy that you will always remember...

..and whether I go with him or not I'm gonna be hurting either way.. but for some reason I still can't do it. I told myself I would wait this time until I actually believed him.. but I don't know what to believe anymore because words just don't get through to me.. and I dunno what will.

I Love You <3

Home from Maine...
it was fun. I hate vacation but I love Wells and I've been there almost every year I've been alive.. and it was good to get away from here for a few days and spend time with my family..

plans for this week..
tomorrow I have court with meg and emily at 2.. I'm scared.

then Tuesday morning I leave for Maine...
it will probly be nice to get away from here.. but boring too. and something bad always happens wen I leave town... I noticed that.

I'll be back Friday probly mid-afternoon I dunno..

but call/txt/IM my phone anytime..
with my new plan I have free nationwide and no long distance so knock your socks off

617-957-6377
kissme6377

adios:]

x3 I love you x3

wait for the boy who will make any ordinary
moment seem magical, the kinda boy who
brings out the best in you & makes you wanna be
a better person, wait for the one who will be your
best friend, who will drop anything to be with you
at anytime, wait for the boy who makes you smile
like no one else and when he smiles you know
he needs you, wait for the boy who wants to show
you off to the world when you are in your sweats
and have no make-up on but appreciates it when
you get all dolled up for him and most of all wait
for the boy who will put you in the center of his
universe-cause that's where you belong <33

July 21

you'll know hes the right one

Hell yeah Summer'04