xoxchubbyxox
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2004 11 September :: 2.27pm
:: Mood: pensive
:: Music: breakaway...
fuck everything
so sad....
so confused...
and theres i can do about it.
id like a comment...
2 <3//s |
[xXx]
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silentcriez
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2004 11 September :: 12.11pm
:: Music: on a sunday
My Greatest Sympathy's *911*
i think all the time about why things happen.. why i lose people.. why i meet people.. why i have to fight with people.. why things change form bad to good so fast and where the in between? i think about life and what it means and i think about how much people i barely know mean so much to me.. i dont understand logic and i dont understand my heart or my brian.. i wish i did i wish i knew what to do i wish i knew exactly how to handle everything i felt, thought and did.. i wish i knew how to cure every heartache and heal every wound but the truth is i cant and theres nothing i can do about it.. i am completely helpless and thats what kills me thats what i hate thats what makes me depressed is not having teh power to change what i want to change..
last night i went to jimmis with lizzy john mike ryann mike costello lee and tim.. NICOLE ALLEN THE LOVE OF MY LIFE LEFT ME TO GO TO THE FOOTBALL GAME!!! haha we had an interesting night i must say
awww dana got so sick and i had to take care of him :-) i didnt care that he was sick tho cuz i felt so bad and i didnt wanna leave him alone cuz he was sooo bad :(
well my sister came home last night :) yayyyyyyyy OMG i got her a gram last night and she was packing a bowl and she looked in it and it was moving.. and so she came over to me and lizzy and were like what is this and she put the bud on the table and we broke it up and there was a little fucking inchworm in it crawling around! how fucking nasty is that
Stepha4391: he must have been FUCKED UP
Stepha4391: little stoner
bahahahaha i love you
- manda
[xXx]
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emmyd
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2004 11 September :: 9.32am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: oldies..
its so early
last nite Ryan, Gui and Ben came over....we TRIED to watch the girl next door..but yea i hate my tv and i donno how to use all the plugs, so we spent forever trying to do that, then we just called katie to have her help us haha but we still didnt really watch it lol
they had to leave early cuz gui was gunna chill with sarah at her house...
haha then after they left katie called me to tell me that she saw WALLY at the football game..hahaha omg i havent seen him since like....the last basketball game! haha or was it that nite at the mall...?? haha i donno but yea i definately need to see him, cuz um Wally is haha nvm...
hmm so today i have to go to the Dentist, then The Orthodontist...ughh then either i have to stay here and clean my room lol, or i can go to natick days...haha but i gotta clean cuz yea the cousins are comin tonite and they always go into my room, so yea...but i wanna go to natick days to see ppl....then around 6 is wen the big italian family will be coming haha...only like half of my family is coming tho cuz sum ppl are away...but i just hope that my cousin Steven is comin cuz i havent seen him in forever, and i miss him
hmm...soo sooo tired rite now my mom fuckin woke me up at like 9...FOR NO REASON baa wtf!
well imma go do sumthin, but i donno wat
leave love
-emmyd
1 <3// |
[xXx]
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silentcriez
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2004 9 September :: 9.58pm
(chorus)
you cant break me
break me even if you try
you cant hold this woman down
you cant take me
take me even if you try
leave me spinning helplessly
but i wont fall down
tomorrow
is just another day
another way
for you to try and break me down
i can tell you now
you wont succeed
you wont reach deep inside me
because you cant get by me
you cant break me down
(chorus)
can you tell me
what its like to look at me
through bias clouded eyes?
hearing all the lies
echoing right back at you?
can you tell me what its like
to live a day in your shoes
the shoes of a weirdo
the shoes of a beauty
a beauty in disguise
(bridge)
you know
you know you cant break me
why do you try
you cant take me
away from what i am
(chorus)
can you tell me what its like
to like a life of ease
to do just as you please
and never have to wonder why...
can you tell me what its like..
to wake up in the morning
glad your here...
glad your in the world today...
1 <3// |
[xXx]
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xoxchubbyxox
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2004 9 September :: 4.44pm
:: Mood: aggravated
:: Music: who will save your soul
....
what is the point in lying if the truth would hurt less anyway?
and whats the point in pretending?
why cant people ever be real..or genuine
why cant people ever mean what they say.
stop playing games, tell the truth.
[xXx]
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emmyd
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2004 9 September :: 2.52pm
:: Mood: bitchy
:: Music: welcome back..
ehhh
hmm classes this week are alright...a lot different from last year, i got no classes with helena...but i have english with manda so thats goood got 2 classes with vinnie and joe...one with mike and jamie....one with heidi and jackie and ellen...yea but umm i hate having to do work lol im SOO lazy omg its crazzyyyyy
lol i talked to anthony today in the hall (yes amanda ur ex) lol he was standin in the hall wen i was in spanish and he was laughing at me haha watta dork...
umm so today...we thought it was a fire drill..but yea it wasnt haha cuz we walked out and we were like umm where are the trucks and fireman? so then we found out sum stupid defective smoke detector went off so yea we were outside madd long...all the lunches got messed up lol i had like 20 mins of 6th period,but a really long 5th period..very confusing day
and yea the bus driver today like completely rode by my bus stop haha so me and steve were like umm wtf...so steve yelled at him to stop :-) haha thanks stephen! lol yea so i only had to walk like 1 minute :-) hehe
tomaros friday....i donno if i can go out tho :-\ baa i wanna!! theres a NHS Football game, but ehh i am NOT watchin that shyt in the rain lol so maybe ill go out with sum pplz...but i donno my mom said i mite not be able to cuz we have that whole family thing on saturday....erg GAY
well im out...
Gangsta E (as kelly would say)
yea cuz im SO black rite....? haha um no
1 <3// |
[xXx]
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xoxchubbyxox
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2004 7 September :: 6.34pm
:: Mood: gloomy
:: Music: not rite now
well...
since i got here..i kept thinking things were gunna change.... like idk..people just calling me..or writing to me... it feels kinda like i dont exist...or like i dont matter any more. its no ones fault. i couldnt help that i was moving.. nobody could. what i eally wonder about is what if i had stayed... would my friendships had lasted like id expected...or would they have faded any wya as i feel them doing now? i tell myself that i would have been happy...but maybe i would be just as sad. i miss u all so much.. more than i can even say. but i wonder is the feeling returned. it hurts to think about because it could be true. am i as much of a loss to u as u were to me? did u care liek i did.
i dont know why i go on and on like this. i guess its because i have no where else to say this.
1 508 277 4424
my new cell, please call me
comment if you can
3 <3//s |
[xXx]
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silentcriez
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2004 7 September :: 10.42am
:: Mood: sick
sorry i havent been updating anything exciting lately..ive been kinda busy.. but ive had fun the past couple of days getting in toruble ;-) ;-) haha
lizzy and i hung out with dana and mike n ppl.. so that was fun :-)
ill write some more when i feel like it..
oh yeah im home sick lol
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another day
another story
another broken aliby
another heart
another worry
another chance that passes by
wont you find me
in the dark
when im lost and on my own?
wont you hold me
in the dark
when i dont know where to go...
(chorusx2)
the truth is
i need you
i love you with all that i am
i cant say
im sorry
im just waiting for the day that youll care
another empty heart
another broken vow
another chance to screw things up
another sunset
another wish
another hope that we could.. stay like this
wont you find me
in the dark
when im lost and on my own?
wont you hold me
in the dark
when i dont know where to go...
(chorusx2)
another morning
another mask..
just another way to hide
another beauty
who hates herself..
another way to hide the lies...
2 <3//s |
[xXx]
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cocopuff
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2004 6 September :: 9.54pm
:: Mood: high
:: Music: Vertical Horizon-
hmmm
I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete
Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches of it looking at me
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?
Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
[break]
Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
So if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
So why don't we go
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
^ love that song for some reason... manda knows the deal LOL
Yea soo schools started back up again... fuckgin can tell u right now i didnt miss it... but w/e i guess its somehting to do insted of sitting on my ass all the time at lest...
this weekend manda and i had fun.. lol managed to get shitfaced last night... hahahaha that was a fun time LMAO!! yea MANDA!!!! and we were high like all weekend.. but what else is new...
well i got school tomorrow (blows) and im soooo burnt out.. im off to bed...
1 <3// |
[xXx]
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xoxchubbyxox
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2004 6 September :: 8.58pm
:: Mood: tired and sad
:: Music: blahhh
none...
went to canobie lake park today...just got home.
i feel so weird not being in natick...like not in school today..or even with all of the people i was with. idk what im talkign about
i just miss u
please comment.
5 <3//s |
[xXx]
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