Bohemain Rhapsody

Am I Crazy?
My mom's friend
is thinking about
selling her house
I think I want it.
Am i crazy
to want it?
Its 8 acers
with an orchard
and a barn
and a chicken coop
with chickens
it is surrounded by trees
and you have to drive down a lane to it
I like it alot
It has wooden floors
and three bedrooms
and two full baths
it is my dream home.
I could see myself living there
am I crazy?
cause everyone else thinks I am
it would probablly cost
like 250,000 dollars
but I dont care
I know I could work it off
I know it will all work out.
Am I crazy?
Am I?
~~I guess I am~~

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2007 22 March :: 8.59pm
:: Music: Guardian Angel -- Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and
Please tell me you'll stay, stay

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven
[to fade]

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2007 13 February :: 11.59pm

"Gravity Of Love"

"O Fortuna velut Luna" ["O Fortune like the Moon"]

Turn around and smell what you don't see
Close your eyes ... it is so clear
Here's the mirror, behind there is a screen
On both ways you can get in.
Don't think twice before you listen to your heart,
Follow the trace for a new start.
What you need and everything you'll feel
Is just a question of the deal.
In the eye of storm you'll see a lonely dove
The experience of survival is the key
To the gravity of love.

"O Fortuna velut Luna"

[Whispers:]
[Woman :]
The path of excess leads to the tower of Wisdom
[Man :]
The path of excess leads to the tower of Wisdom

Try to think about it...
That's the chance to live your life and discover
What it is, what's the gravity of love

"O Fortuna velut Luna"

Look around just people, can you hear their voice
Find the one who'll guide you to the limits of your choice.
But if you're in the eye of storm
Just think of the lonely dove
The experience of survival is the key
To the gravity of love.

"O Fortuna velut Luna"
"O Fortuna velut Luna"

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2006 27 December :: 12.11am

i really like him alot
but im so afraid
that im going to lose him
but i dont want him
to leave
because he is everything
he is complete
hes the movement
and hes the spin
i like him alot
i want him to be my companion
forever and ever
is that alot to sak for??

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2006 19 December :: 12.11am
:: Mood: thoughtful

lately, i have been
thinking about
all the people
who have died
we were driving
past this spot
where this college student
had died
she was either pushed
or she jumped
off the bridge
on to the highway
i didnt know here
put the little
white flower
that was on the bridge
broke my heart
i wish i knew something
about the girl
then it occured to me
when i die
people will know
nothing about me
and that scared me
i dont want to
leave meaning nothing
my inner thoughts never heard
people will say things about me
that really arent true
like i gave back
to the community
through habitat
and that im such a great person
but im not
i lie
i cheat
i steal
i decieve
i feel so unworthy
to be told in that light

its funny...
everyone wants to get a job
but i really dont want to
i cant see myself
doing anything
but im going to college
so i can better myself
and get a job
so i can pay off my loans
but i really dont want one
i want to stay home
and raise children
and clean a house
and bake cakes
and cookies
and pies
as surprise
and i want to take care
of the man i marry
i want to massage
his back
after a long day at work
i want to give him his newspaper
as i cook in the kitchen
this may sound so weird
and retro
but i would be happy
just doing all that
but in the end
i will conform
and get a job
so i can pay off my loans
and buy the house
i always wanted

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2006 14 December :: 12.49am

i am sick of this
spiralling out of control
i will have it
i will have it back
i will do it
i can
i can be like them
be like them
pure. thin. unbroken.

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2006 12 November :: 11.32pm

could this all...
be just a dream

could these feelings
i feel
everytime you smile
no
look at me
be really real??

i really really like you.

i think this is for real.

dont you?

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2006 30 October :: 10.38pm

i dont know what i would do without this boy
he slept on the hospital floor
for me
awwwe!

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2006 27 October :: 12.45am

zach is such a comfort to me. when he holds me... i feel so safe and secure. i was so grateful for him when we went to the emergancy room. i was glad that he was there to hold my hands. and he cares so much and its so cute... i really think i found a keeper. i hope nothing goes dreadfully wrong in the future that we get sperated. im thinking since i want to be together and i know i could have a good life with zach, fates going to change everything for me. shes going to mess it all up for me. which makes me very sad. i know this is not permanent. i know that this will not last forever... but im so happy here... in this moment... together... with him.

One lump or two?

insomniac

:: 2006 22 October :: 11.22am

maybe i'm doing this journal thing again?
...
all the cool kids are doing it...

11, 12 days?
can meyouwe evfsdkj

i need. to stop thinking some stupid things. but it sucks to be always waiting.
lack of speaking
leads to thinking.
and how almost everything i do reminds me of othergirl who's involved.

i think a huge creature was just outside my window.

i'm using a new facewash just recently, it turns my face icy if i leave it on, and makes me think of snow and winter. i miss winter chill. even if it's always been lonely, i fell in love in(with) winter chill.

why should i be vague here, or even here at all? my thoughts aren't presented in a bow. they're fucked here.

so they are perfect. just like you. fucked and perfect.

god damn it.

i dont know what tabbs looks like. not at all.

you promised we'd talk today. but you just fell asleep.
even little things, when will you start keeping your promises?

this journal is probably pointless.

yeah. wuteva.

I love you exponentially.

One lump or two?

jus4fun06

:: 2006 18 October :: 11.59pm

my ear hurts. i miss my ear. my real ear... not this swollen, red ugly one that hurts like a mo-fo. *frownie face.

One lump or two?