Leeder

:: 2003 21 October :: 12.12am

::15 Random Favorites::
1: the color purple
2: my blanket
3: jason :)
4: diet coke
5: good hand lotion
6: ben kweller
7: kitties
8: theater
9: my car
10: roller skating
11: charlies angels
12: WIDR
13: my brown boots
14: chapstick
15: my apartment
::14 Favorite Foods::
1: pizza
2: french fries
3: doughnuts
4: chicken and dumplings
5: pasta
6: peanut butter
7: granola bars
8: grilled cheese sandwiches
9: belgian waffles
10: diet coke
11: mac and cheese
12: french toast
13: chicken alfredo
14: beef stroganoff
::13 Most Watched Shows::
1: this
2: is
3: really
4: a
5: ridiculous
6: question;
7: i
8: don't
9: have
10: television
11: in
12: my
13: apartment
::12 Good Bands in your Opinion::
1: ben kweller
2: green day
3: modest mouse
4: the cranberries
5: the eels
6: iron and wine
7: grandaddy
8: everclear
9: deftones
10: a perfect circle
11: ben folds (five)
12: barenaked ladies
::11 Memories::
1: the beach
2: the beach part II
3: halloween as a kitty
4: not one but two cop cars
5: charlies angels at rosies
6: celebration on the grand
7: modest mouse
8: "can you see my butt?"
9: my "run-in" with the cargo van
10: the noctunal hamster
11: lord of the rings II
::10 Close Friends::
1: jason
2: eliz
3: the whole great sex cast
4: mike
5: first fox gang
6: kal
7: katti
8: kristin
9: nick
10: mommy
::09 Things you're looking forward to::
1: sleep
2: the play being over
3: the semester being over
4: going to belgium
5: graduating
6: getting a masters?
7: getting married
8: having children
9: enjoying life
::08 Things you wear daily::
1: underwear...well...usually...
2: nail polish
3: contact lenses
4: hairties
5: 3 earrings
6: shoes of some variety
7: chapstick
8: clothing of some variety...well...usually...
::07 Things That Annoy You::
1: mcguiver
2: my hair
3: the play
4: frat boys
5: dishes in the sink
6: homework
7: telemarketers
::06 Things You Touch Everyday::
1: myself...hehehe
2: water..in the shower
3: my keys
4: my phone
5: the newspaper
6: mcguiver
::05 Movies You Could Watch Over and Over::
1: chicago
2: the new guy
3: grease
4: west side story
5: ferris bueller
::04 Of Your Favorite Childhood Toys::
1: nintendo
2: my vetrinarian set
3: pound puppy
4: roller skates
::03 People You Have Kissed::
1: lets
2: not
3: start
::02 Of Your Favorite Songs::
1: "The Night Decending" by Iron & Wine
2: "All-Nite Diner" by Modest Mouse
::01 Person You Could Spend the Rest of Your Life With::
1: ...

Countdown brought to you by BZOINK!

:: 2003 17 October :: 12.09pm

i dont know what it is, but i feel very lost.
and anxious.

like something big is about to happen that will make everything finally make sense.

:: 2003 16 October :: 11.12pm

tumultuous...yes, that is a very good word.

:: 2003 16 October :: 4.05pm

missing something.

my apartment is really trashed.

i dont have a spare moment these days.

something caught my eye and mind today that tossed me back into remembering a time when I was happy with how things ARE and not how they could be.

i need to stop thinking about the future, things never go as planned.

:: 2003 15 October :: 9.27am

GREAT SEXPECTATIONS
Tonite in Eldridge/Fox @ 7pm
and Harrison/Stinson @ 9pm
Please come and watch us, it should be a good show.

3 comments | leave a comment

:: 2003 13 October :: 2.59pm
:: Mood: sick

Yeah, so sleeping like 15 hours in one night really helps the system. I still feel like crap, but it was so much worse like 7 hours ago. It's been a very relaxing extended weekend, I like this.

Thanks for the babying last night dear, that helped a lot.

:: 2003 12 October :: 3.05am
:: Mood: nervous
:: Music: A Perfect Circle - Judith

Wow. What a night. It was a wonderful night, but regardless, everything is falling to pieces. It's nice to have a home to come back to, there's a sense of comfort here, something I need especially tonight. Thank you again to everyone who helped me with my car, it was much appreciated.

So I got four comments about my weight loss and one about my "homosexuality," so we'll call that a good day.

Jesus, what the hell happened tonight? I feel pretty empty right now.

4 comments | leave a comment

:: 2003 9 October :: 10.38pm

i have so little faith in my emotions

:: 2003 9 October :: 9.37pm
:: Mood: momentarily stable
:: Music: Blink-182 - Dammit

well i guess this is growing up...
Jason's opening vignette: Someday, hopefully, I will be confident in my ability to live (almost) completely independent. I'm not there yet.

OK, so I've finally got internet at my house now. Woohoo! It's only dial-up, but it'll do for the time being. It's been so hard trying to get everything I need to do online in between classes, so this will hopefully make the day a little easier. Anyway, it's been a very rocky day, and I will share my thoughts and observations throughout the day, conviently prefixed with the time at which they were recorded! Lucky you! Yeah, anyway, on with it...

11:35am: "He senses my heart isn't in it anymore, and he follows in suit. I can't blame him."

12:10pm: "I want him to hurt, I want you all to hurt, to feel one ounce of the pain you have inflicted upon me. I want to turn it on you and make you hurt. I want you to suffer and the world to feel my pain."

12:40pm: "So many things just went wrong in quick succession. I can't breathe."

1:00pm: "My life is comprised of making mistakes, then repenting for said mistakes until I'm blue in the face, and then proceeding to make the same mistakes over again.

1:11pm: "Ben Folds was a very good choice for my mood. He needs to come out with another disc soon."

3:10pm: "That midterm went pretty well."

3:15pm: "I would love to learn to play the piano. I don't see it happening."

3:31pm: "He's so much like me it's scary sometimes."

3:41pm: "The key is not to let him, or anyone or anything else for that matter, get to me, but honestly, how the fuck is that going to happen?"

That's about it... oh yeah, I almost forgot: Kevin said "symbology" in World Cinema yesterday. Which is just plain wrong for a couple reasons: 1) He used it not as "the study of symbols" but instead as you would use "symbolism." and 2) "Symbology," of course, is not a word.

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:: 2003 5 October :: 7.34pm

My inner child is six years old today

My inner child is six years old!

Look what I can do! I can walk, I can run, I can
read! I like to do stuff, and there's a whole
big world out there to do it in. Just so long
as I can take my blankie and my Mommy and my
three best friends with me, of course.

How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

:: 2003 30 September :: 12.19pm

I knew that I needed a change.
But that wasn't what I was thinking.
Maybe you've shown me what's necessary for my better good.

:: 2003 25 September :: 5.52pm
:: Mood: good
:: Music: Beck - Diamond Dogs

Ahh, the irony... say, does anybody want to attend either of these concerts with me:

Eels
Blind Pig, Ann Arbor, MI
Sun, Oct 26, 2003 8:30pm
Price $15.00

Barenaked Ladies
Devos Hall, Grand Rapids, MI
Tue, Nov 04, 2003 7:30pm
Price $35.00

Let me know ASAP. Thanks.

Also, I'm trying to find a new car, before my old one turns into even more of a money pit. I'd really like a '97-'00 Monte Carlo (I don't like the new style) or a '00-'01 Sunfire... but if anybody has any good leads, I'm open.

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:: 2003 24 September :: 2.09pm

The paomnnehil pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at
Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a
wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at
the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it
wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter
by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

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