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everyone we know is growing old

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godessalthena

:: 2011 13 May :: 1.10pm

ready for a do-over
i'm so tired of this old, worn out place.
i'm so sick of getting the things i want then getting bored of them.
its ridiculous how little i enjoy in my life anymore.

i'm so ready for feburary.
i'm so ready to start moving forward in my life rather than stagnate here.

i am so depressed.
i am so worn out.
i am so fed up.

i'm full of rage and of disgust and of venom.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 13 May :: 12.04pm

He's taking the job. Roomies can be happy now, he won't be over again for a long time.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 13 May :: 1.16am

I feel like actually giving up. Not just saying it but actually doing it. I TRY. you don't. Why?

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 11 May :: 10.12pm

I just want to get so fucking trashed I forget my life ever happened.

I hate every fucking day. I hate every fucking hour.

I feel useless, stupid, abused, victimized.

I never look forward to getting up.

The best part of my life are my nightmares. Because it's not my life.

I'm done feeling. I'm done trying. I'm just fucking done.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 10 May :: 8.15am

I feel like you have just given up on me. Like everyone else. Why should I care about myself anymore?

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 5 May :: 5.09pm

I'm working out everyday. I'm going to kill myself skinny.

I'm so tired of meeting douchebags who act like they want to be your friend, lead you on and then just stop all communication and then.. After the secretly decide they don't want to be involved with you in any form you call them out and they act like they're in the right. They are selfish disgusting fuckheads who deserve to be eliminated from the human race. It's called common courtesy people. I would think that moms taught it to their children but apparently that went of of practice in the 80's and on.

I'm tired of this place. And these people. The only people who like Spokane seem to be the fuckheads who thinks it's ok to flake. To be a hypocrite. To treat other people like shit. It's disgusting and disheartening.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 2 May :: 7.31pm

I asked myself if today could get any worse.

Yes it could.

But it's still pretty shitty.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 30 April :: 12.58am

Tonight was fun :)

And having rent is a good feeling.

I'm working OT this week. being extra responsible!

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 25 April :: 1.40pm

Lab tests and weight gain.

I'm scared. And have no comfort.

I know what a partial reason for it is. But there could be so many other things wrong. Things that idk can be fixed.

What's for sure is I need to get serious about losing this weight. I need to do something. Why can't I just get motivated?

I hate living here. I hate feeling so out of control. I feel disempowered. I feel weak. I feel hopeless. I need help, but can't afford it.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 21 April :: 7.43pm

Home of an IUD. no babies, periods or hormones for me!

It hurts but I can deal.

3 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 12 April :: 1.39am

Happy birthday to me!!

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 10 April :: 8.56pm

April fools about the baby.
I actually am considering getting my tubes tied since the age to do it is 23 now from what I hear..

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 9 April :: 7.13am

Photobucket

New metal DDR pad :) lotsa booze breasts and fine friends. Over all a very epic birthday :D

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 8 April :: 3.02am

Birthday party tomorrow. Maybe the baby won't like the alcohol and leave. Maybe I can still have a good birthday. I hate people.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 7 April :: 11.55am

There's a hole in my heart.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 5 April :: 6.29pm

I hate my life.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 3 April :: 4.59am

This will be the death of us

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 1 April :: 3.54pm

Well it's official.. I'm going to be having a little bun growing in my oven... I honestly don't know what to think. Or do. I feel so confused. :(

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 31 March :: 5.45pm

I feel used. Taken advantage of. Pissed.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


redefinedgrace

:: 2011 26 March :: 8.07pm
:: Music: Amazing Grace

The moment you can finally love yourself, you are truly free.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 26 March :: 12.50pm

Last night I dreamt I had a little crab and didn't die.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 23 March :: 9.52pm

I'm so tired of feeling.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 19 March :: 10.27pm

I miss the muppet show haha

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 18 March :: 2.50pm

Last night was a blast!
I'm super sleepy but drunken debauchery is so worth it!
The kitchen is a mess. And the puppy.. Fucking cute as ever!

I think as long as I just stop thinking about where I am the next year won't be so bad. It's hard to think of leaving this job too.. It's just so good. In so many ways.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 17 March :: 4.29am

I wish I had a best friend.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 14 March :: 10.05pm

Got a bitching raise and bonus! Got a cute little puppy! Got a handsome boyfriend and I got a good job!

Things are looking good.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 12 March :: 12.28pm

This was a bitching weekend.

Honestly I forgot my pills two days and it still rocked :)

:D

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 7 March :: 4.56pm

I'm so angry I could cry

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 5 March :: 9.11pm

Life is a big circle. A big repeating let down. All disappointments. All crushing disappointments.

Its hard to stay positive with all the sadness in the air. It feels like its trying to suffocate me.

Puppy comes home in 5 days. I'm really going to committ to this. No more getting angry and giving up. I need to prove I can do this. Mostly for myself. I want this.

i want to hear the stories of your love for me


godessalthena

:: 2011 5 March :: 2.56pm

I love cell phones
I love being employed
I love tattoos

i want to hear the stories of your love for me

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