Jessika
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2004 24 February :: 10.27am
:: Mood: nauseated
:: Music: *hummmmmmm*
EMO!!!!
DAMN JOURNAL SKJDWRFJNSXJNKMWQ!!!!
I feel very sick lately. My throat hurts and coughing and sneezing are worse. I can hardly talk sometimes. My stomach feels like it hates me so is going to throw partially digested food everywhere as revenge.I am very achy and sore. Gym is a bitch. Unfortunately, I can not stay home tommorrow as we schedule. Not something I want to have to make up.
I am going to take a 7am class with Gwen/Mishelle if possible. Bio or Culinary Arts. I have to take Culinary Arts to get a vocational credit. Question for anyone: What do electives count towards? Do we get credit for them?
I think I got a pretty ok grade in drama today...I hope I got extra credit for being in two groups = }...
*sneeze* Owwwwwwwww
Egg drop is greatly confusing me.
Umm...Alex likes dicks!
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LoupGarou
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2004 23 February :: 7.58pm
:: Mood: crappy
:: Music: Eternal - Evanescence
Stupid....stuff
Today was dumb. Stupid boring stuff. It seemed like everything went wrong. That Ruben guy hurt my feelings and is pissing me off and everything is just... being stupid. Marilyn's mom says she wants to talk to my mom in person because of some emails a friend sent us (which wasn't his fault) and I didn't even read the emails. I don't want Marilyn to start eating herself up about it either because it was just and accident and could happen to anyone, really.
But if her mom really does want to talk to my mom I hope that she won't say anything that I'll regret or whatever. I really want to sit outside and let rain fall on me right now. Rain is nice.
But it isn't raining.
I know it doesn't sound like much to be sad over and I know that a lot of people go through a lot worse every day, but I don't know. It makes me sad. It doesn't have to make anyone else sad because they may not understand, but I guess there's more.
Things brought up that hurt something deep down inside me that I can't really explain. Maybe I'm just tired.
It'll be february 25 soon. The day after tomorrow. Maybe that has something to do with it.
I hate february 25.
Lucas kept acting like an idiot again today. I told him that he should give up turning arouond and talking to Jessie during Language Arts for Lent. He said: "You know what you should give up for lent?"
"Oh, what should I give up for lent?"
"You should give up talking so we don't have to hear you yapping all the time."
What a bastard. I HATE HIM! God, I wanted to slap him!
"The only reason I talk to you is to get you to shut up because you're pissing me off!"
"You're pissing ME off."
Well you know what? Fuck it. If he hadn't been acting like a jackass we wouldn't have this problem now would we? But obviously he isn't smart enough to figure that out. In math he sits behind me. We were getting some papers passed back and he started chanting, "oo, one-hundred percent, one-hundred percent" over and over again. I turned around and asked him very nicely to please be quiet, but he kept on doing it. So I turned around and said "You're real cocky, you know that? Shut up." I mean I can understand if you're happy about your grades, but you don't do that. It's just down right rude. If you like what you got you keep it to yourself. I don't give a damn what he got. Does he expect everyone to turn around and say "Oh gee golly gosh, Lucas! That's amazing! I wish I could be like you!"
I think he's just doing it to make other people feel bad. I've seen his other math papers. He isn't so great. All those times he got 60s and 70s on daily quizzes isn't all that admirable. I think I have a higher math grade than he does. And if not that then I know I do in English and Language Arts and maybe some other stuff as well. He is such an ass.
I really want to kick him in the shins really hard. Or maybe even a bit higher, to a place where it would hurt even worse.
MUAHAHAA. I hate him.
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chuckitatthewall
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2004 23 February :: 9.26pm
:: Mood: sad and angry and generally pissed off at everythi
this entry is going to suck but it must be written. i want jimmy to know that its not his fault and i'm not mad at him at all for this.
yesterday afternoon jimmy sent me 4 emails that were of him and some other kid swearing a lot at eachother and stuff. i told my mom she could use the computer and i thought i clicked out of the window but i didnt. so i came back downstairs and she was looking at it and saying "marilyn, what is this?" i had to tell her about it and she got really mad at me. she said that she didnt want me talking to people who used this kind of language. well i said i wouldnt but i'm going to anyway and i'm going to have to be really really carefull of my language. i tried telling her that he was only defending himself against the other kid but she didnt listen to me. i hate myself right now...if only i had clicked out of it. shes also
i went to softball today and i got put in the outfield. i didnt see ruben and i didnt get to beat him. i also got hit on my thigh and i now have a large red spot thats slightly swollen and painful.
school sucked. i really dont think i have anything else to say except this which is for jimmy and jessica: i'm REALLY REALLY sorry. i feel like shit and i'm going to cry...to much bad stuff has happened today.
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Jessika
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2004 23 February :: 1.44am
:: Mood: angry
:: Music: Nope.
Damn math!
Blast these damn word problems! Blast them all to hell!!!!!!!!!!! -_-
I have asked Nick. He had to go because the aunt was calling. I have asked Gwen. Of course she was lost. And also sleepy = p. I asked Alex. He was lost. I asked Alex(ander). He just would not help me. I asked Lindsey. She helped me greatly with one, but I did not want to pester her with MATH = p. I asked Kyle. He tried and tried but could not get any to work. I asked my older brother. He tried numerous ways and even went to get his math book (He is in college fro the second time...business stuff). He could not get 'em. DAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh well.. Thank you all for helping somewhat...
Nick...did you get them all??? I shall kill you happily if you did. = ).
I really need to sleep.
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Jessika
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2004 22 February :: 9.24pm
Fuck you all.
You are Pig Pen!
Which Peanuts Character are You? brought to you by Quizilla
Goddess of Loneliness
What Emotional Goddess Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
The goddesses were along the same lines. Lonliness...sadness...I see the connection.
I don't want to work on math.
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silversoldier
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2004 22 February :: 4.19pm
:: Mood: thoughtful
:: Music: "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger" - Daft Punk
sorry I didn't update
Yeah... I've been lazy... too bad... plus, I don't exactly have my h/w yet... Anyways, our play was better (yeah, yeah... school pride) :P The cast/crew party was not the most happening, so don't worry about it, Shelli0 & Jessika. We just stayed up until one watching Wallace and Grommit, The Brave Little Toaster, and watching David's and Jessica's (too many Jess's....) feet having sex... very strange.
So, I came up with an idea for a new book. It's going to be called "Gods and Mortals in the Household Realm" ... comparison of the deviance of Christian religion to the relationship of father and son. Wow... that sounded extremely sophisticated, even coming from me...
I'm realizing (and how naiive of me to not notice until now) that I seriously need to be in a relationship, because I'm becomming overly affectionate to many many people... mildly disturbing... but I feel like I just need one person to cuddle up with now (awe, how sentimental).
Anyways, I need to get all my homework done. Mainly, I have about another 200 pages to read in A.H.W.O.S.G. .... yeah... right now, the guy is interviewing for the first season of Real World San Fran. ... very entertaining...
Anyways, I'm going to make my farewells for the moment. I love you all (affection bleeding through right now), and one day we will all have children!!! ahahahaha!... oh, except for you, Alexander... but that's understandable...
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chuckitatthewall
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2004 22 February :: 4.06pm
:: Mood: pissed
what a terrible day it is. i just finished up the unit project for science and its really bad! i think i'm going to bring in the moldy bread tomorrow to show it to the class but i'm not sure yet cause that might get me kicked out cause mrs. gurries is a allergic (sp?) to everything. so i had to write part of toni anns part up and this is what she gave me to work off of:
Ok so it didnt really mold it just got all dewy and hard. On the first day the one in my fridge got all hard. The one in the dark and the one at room temperature were the same and by the second day it got all dewy (the one in the dark and at room temperature) and it smelled kinda weird but it didnt have a strong smell to it. By then the one outside was already gone. By the middle of the first week i lost the cheese in the fridge because my mom threw it out. Acctually it stuck to the plate. Then she scraped it off and threw it away. The things were pretty much the same with the cheese in the dark and the cheese at room temperature but it got dewyer. i touched the dew once, and it felt like oil. Acctually i put paper in the bowl with the one in the dark and the one at room temp and the paper was like see through but it didnt get wet and fall apart. I dont know how to describe it so I'll jsut bring in one of the two papers in a plastic bag on monday. And yea..... so if you have any questions just call me at my house. we probably will stay at the house the rest of the week and move in our new house on Tuesday so you can call me at my house. Man when we were packing yesterday this huge box feel on top of me and it hurt!!!!!!! And I like got practically got high writing stuff on boxes!!!!! Our house is creepy with nothing inside of it. Wait my dad just said we will stay at a hotel till Tuesday but we will check up on the messages at the house daily so if you cant reach us during the week just leave a message. So yea......Thanks again for doing most of the board but now you made me feel really bad like im taking credit for something i didnt do!!! Anyways thanks!
THATS ALL!!!!!!! oh well i dont feel like talking about it anymore cause it annoys me so i'll talk about something else that annoys me even more.
MICHELLE! MY STUPID ANNOYING SISTER! usually i complain about maureen or mary but michelle is really driving me nuts today. right now she lives in shasta for college but she still annoys the shit out of me. so today she has called once to "just check in cause i have nothing better to do" and yesterday she called twice cause first she wanted to talk to my dad about something and then she wanted to tell my mom she went to the doctor cause she hurt her shoulder. i can understand calling for the shoulder a little but still! I MEAN WHEN SHES ALL GROWN UP IS SHE GOING TO CALL FOR EVERYTHING?? i can just hear it "today i watched a movie and it was really good."and then she'll call to say "i went to the store and got some stuff" and then she'll say "last night i got drunk and threw up"....shes already done the calling about being drunk thing. SHES SO DUMB! SHE CALLS JUST TO HEAR HERSELF TALK! ITS LIKE SHES STILL HERE! i miss it when she was gone at her boarding school and they said that she could only call between 6 and 7 pm. that was really nice cause then we'd only hear her once a night for a short time cause everyone wanted to use the phone.
so for some good news my parents are gone again looking for some more houses in morgan hill today..the really nice ones that are new. i hope we can move into one but i doubt it cause they've been saying that since i was like 8.
i'm bored and once again i've complained too much but i guess thats what i have this for. bye.
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LoupGarou
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2004 21 February :: 3.48pm
:: Mood: okay
:: Music: Oh God I don't really want to say. Aw, what the hell; This is New Shit - Marilyn Manson
San Francisco
Yesterday I went to San Francisco with Marilyn and Louise. It was fun indeed! On the drive over there it drizzled a bit, which was nice. Louise had bought some Axe beforehand because she liked the smell of it. So we spent a lot of time smelling the can because Marilyn's mom didn't like it when we sprayed it in the car. Well actually I couldn't blame her. When I first got in the car they sprayed it and I practically choked on it because it was so strong.
We drove around a bit and stopped at KFC for lunch. I kept singing, "Ohhh Taco Bell, taco bell, product placement with Taco bell..." It was fun. Hey, what ever happened to that chihuahua anyway? When we were eating lunch on the upper level I saw a man who was posing as a girl. It was interesting, to say the least.
We drove around some more and went through downtown SF where all the big skyscrapers are. We parked next to Ghirradelli square where a black man was playing the saxophone. He started playing the Adams Family theme song and Louise and I had fun snapping at the right moment. HEE HAW! *cough*. We looked through the shops there, including a really cool hat shop and then went into the ghirradelli ice cream shop and got a hot fudge sundae. We sat there and ate like pigs while these little kids went and made noise the whole time. Marilyn kept uttering curses at them under her breath while louise kicked at a brave pigeon that decided to take a walk and eat the crumbs on the ground between people's shoes.
We drove around a little more and went down to Fort Point which was down under the Golden Gate. It was made out of brick and had National Guards with big machine guns patrolling the area, but you could go into the fort. There were barely any people there, but I thought it was really cool. We walked up a stone spiral staircase and if you turned you'd enter this room which was basically an exhibit. But if you walked further into the room you'd see there was a long hallway going through what must have been at least fifteen different rooms. At the end of the hallway was a very dark room so if you were at one end of the hallway looking down there it was like something in a horror movie. We walked through to the end room practically when we saw it! (DUN DUN DUNNNN!) A person! Actually it turned out to be a wooden model of a person dressed in a uniform, but it's one of those things that really doesn't help when you're already freaked out. We walked around on the top level for a while. Actually I more like skipped around the top level then walked, and I sang the Pirates of the caribbean song. THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS, THE ORIGINAL ONE FROM THE RIDE! Not to say that I didn't love the movie to death.
We walked down the stairway and went to the second level. We went all the way around which was kind of scary because NO ONE was there on that level, and in some of the corners there would be these places that were really dark so you couldn't see anything. *creepy voice comes out of nowhere* Something lurks in the shadows... muuuAAAAHAHAHA HA HA HA! *darth vader-like breathing is heard, and then it slowly fades away*
Umm... *looks around* where did that come from?... O_o... anyway, where was I? Oh yes. So we walked around and went all the way through the creepy horror movie tunnel to the dark place at the end. We went from there all the way around THAT level as well. I stopped at one point when I saw a little hallway thing. Marilyn wanted to movev on but Louise stayed back with me to check it out. We went inside and saw there was a locked door. On the walls to either side were signatures. One was even from 1896. There was also a faded black cross painted on one of the walls. Maybe someone had died there, or maybe it was simply something painted there to symbolize something else. Either way, I thought the whole place was very interesting. I want to go back there sometime.
We started heading back from there and drove through neighborhoods where the rich people lived. before we got on the highway we stopped at a beach called bakers beach for about ten minutes. It was really beautiful. It was about dusk by that time, so the view of the Golden Gate and the hills was really amazing.
Marilyn's mom said that next month we could come here again and go visit the Japanese tea gardens and spend more time on the beach and stuff. That'll be fun ^_^.
Yush.
I feel loved.
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Jessika
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2004 21 February :: 10.48pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: Leave it to Beaver
*sets Mishelle ablaze*
Yes. *sets Mishelle ablaze for her "interpretations"*
I went to the play. I enjoyed their unison. It was...weird...And I now know who Lacey is! WOO!!! It made me want to go out and find a duo piece and do it with Gwen NOW. Like sometiems Deviant inspires people to draw...that inspired me to act. I am a loser. Leave me be. I now need to go write a paper on it for drama.
Nick is going bald AND gray! Mwaaaa!!!
Shell and I are just a "herub (SP??) of girls" after Nick. My meaning that I had in life dissintegrated.
We were going to go to the cast/crew party. Damn the mom of Shell's. But no, because she was nice enough to give me a ride. Thank the mom!
I need to do the Egg Drop capsule tommorrow.
Wow I am bored.
This is going to sound pathetic. I want emo music so I can just sit and cry.
I think I am becoming sentimental or whacked out of my mind or something. I began to cry today. No particular reason. I was not sad until then. It hurt like a bitch to cry out of the blue like that. I quite wish it had not happened.
A dream is a wish your heart makes. This is quite true. If you do not know what you are feeling or something, read your dreams. It is amazing what they tell you. Maybe there is a reason why I can never remember mine.
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Jessika
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2004 20 February :: 11.06pm
:: Mood: annoyed
:: Music: I have
Fucking journal just deleted ENTIRE entry -_-
DAMN JOURNAL!!!! *sets it ablaze* = )
I just got back from the play. I still like it. I saw all kinds of people I don't like. Such as: Policy debaters out the ass (for those stupid kids, that means alot ;-)..), Katie Hall, Michelle Noble, Allyson English (she can be ok...), Skyler Morgan, Maggie...Yup.
I am very sore and I do not know why.
My mom is watching the Home Shopping Network O_o..
I die everyday..the death of her dying soul...
In choir stupid people got us a writing assignment.
In English the stupid teacher had me read like 2 full pages today. GRR on her. -_- *sets her ablaze next to my journal* Damn Mishelle got me using that.....
Motion problems absolutely suck. EWWW and such. I am sucking as of late. = p
Nick's mom's van is going to explode. Not Lacey's car.
Ummm....I think that is all.
NO!!! It isn't! I got Lion King 1 and 1/2!!! YAYYYY!!!!!!!!
That is all. ^_^
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chuckitatthewall
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2004 20 February :: 1.33pm
Chris Lee and other assholes
Last night I added Nick Dazzi and most of his stupid ass friends to my hate list. Nick made 2 sns yesterday just to im me and call me a bitch and a fag and some other stuff then ask me why i hadnt blocked him yet. STUPID MOTHERFUCKIN ASSHOLE! why the hell should i have to keep blocking people cause they are harrassing me??? i think it might be chris lee but i'm not completely sure that he knows there is a "nick d" in my class. he probly does though cause anthoney rogers transfered out of there school to ours and probly told them. i'm so fuckin pissed right now and its the next fuckin morning!
this morning everyone was fuckin yelling really loud but some how i managed to stay in bed until 9:30. i hate them all. i came down and asked my sister why everyone was yelling and she said our dogs got into the neighbors yard and he was pissed. i love the rain but i hate the fuckin wind and if it werent for the fuckin wind our fence wouldnt have crashed over. STUPID ASS WIND!
yesterday night i got grounded i think but i'm not sure if my dad remembers or not. hes so stupid. (sorry for going out of order) so he fuckin comes in and says "get of the internet and turn off the computer" so i say 'fine dad i'm getting off right now" then he comes in and reads what i'm typing and i was talking to jimmy and i'm not supposed to talk to people i dont know so i'm sorry for not responding to those other things you sent. anyway so jessicas window was up and i put "my daddys making me get off right now" or something and then he saw that and said "your off for a week now" so i said "fine dad i dont care" and i almost started crying cause of the nick dazzi thing and he didnt even care that i was distressed. well i admit the tears come awfully easy when i'm trying to get out of trouble but i was upset. after that he demanded to know who i was talking to cause i had a shit load of boxes up and i told him and he said "oh okay." its like dude your such a fuckin dumbass. he doesnt even know how easy it is to lie about who your talking to on the internet. so i'm going to try to get out of my punishment or sneak on in the afternoons when i'm home alone to write in here and stuff.
they said there is another storm coming but i dont see it. last night i did and i went outside and stood in the rain for a while to relax but it wasnt raining hard enough for it to be fun. i hate this fuckin week and i wish it would end and i could go back to school and be so wrapped up in all the fuckin work that i wont have time to care about what chris lee does and all his shit.
i have to fuckin clean my rabbit right now and take a shower and do some of the dishes in about an hour and a half...this fuckin sucks. bye.
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Jessika
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2004 19 February :: 7.30pm
:: Mood: pissed off
:: Music: Sister Sister
Damn English teacher!!
I had to stay after for a timed write. I went all debater......security to improve quality life...blah blah blah......That was ok and not too bad.
Then my English teacher got back from a meeting and we began working on my essay revisions (I got a D-!), and she pretty much told me I have no points whatsoever and I can not organize my thoughts. She "helped" me get straight points....bullshit like that......Then she started on the typical "You have potential....blah blah blah...." So I said something to the effect of how I can not write, I lack creativity, I am good at grammar and talking and that is it. She then went about how I can discuss things..TALKING......why she was being stupid....then she said she has seen me write good and stuff.....I said no....then I was just "arguing with" her or so she said......I left nearly in tears and very very pissed. BITCH.
Drama was fun today. We played games.
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chuckitatthewall
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2004 19 February :: 2.05pm
:: Music: beatles
hashem...
HI! i'm really bored right now so i'm going to update and write what happened over the past day and half or whatever.
uh...I CANT THINK! ok i need some inspiration. oh ok well yesterday was nice. jessica came over so we could work on our science unit project and ruben likes jessica. i just am being honest right now so dont be mad but i dont think he is very good. yesterday he told us he did drugs and he was shaking cause of it. hes really nice and stuff and hes hot so i dont blame anyone for liking him but i think that thats really bad and so...oh well. I'M HAPPY FOR JESSICA! just dissapointed that he did drugs. jessicas mom came at about 6:30 and thats when she was supposed to go home. not when my parents are home though. i feel so bad. i think that by the time they finally left my mom told her mom our life history...again. its really embarrassing. i would love to tell her to shut up but she wouldnt listen even if i did so its pointless.
so now i'll say more about hashem. nobody really likes him at his school and i guess they make fun of him a lot or something cause he tried to commit suicide. i was talking to beer last night and i asked how hashem was and he told me that hes in a mental institution. i hope he gets better so he doesnt try it again.
i listened to "let it be" a little while ago..its so stinking sad. theres a picture of my aunt marie like 10 feet away and then i looked at it and then i started crying. its so sad. curse the beatles! no..i like the beatles.
theres nothing else to say. bye
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Jessika
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2004 19 February :: 7.22am
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: Evanescance - My Immortal
Damn you, I like to sleep.
I went to sleep around 7:30 last night. I slept for 13 hours. Now I do not get to take a shower because I have to do math. Damn.
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Jessika
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2004 18 February :: 8.50pm
:: Mood: Very, very tired indeed
:: Music: diabetes commercial
*yawn*
Screw editing my other entry.
I went to the banquet. It was a waste of bed time. The teachers did a skit about the "typical" teenager (jocks and preps), then a raffle (I won nothing ((DAMN POLICY DEBATERS)))...Whoa that looks funny. Anyway I should be sleeping right now. Rochelle gave me a MAJOR headache. I kept dozing off during the raffle. I slept on the way home. I do not feel as if I wish to do homework today. I have damn word problems again in math and they are stupid and I don't understand them! Goddamnit! *angry face*
I feel lazy. Inertia.
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