:: 2004 21 March :: 3.04 pm

ahh im tired
ive been up since 7:30 yesterday morning.
Sleep is beckoning me but i have to go to work in 2ish hours and if i take a nap ill never be able to get up and go to work. it sucks and i need to do some algebra but if i come home and my mom finds a dirty house shell be angry and so i should clean the house. incredible
anyway I guess if disliking someone i never like in the first place makes me a backstabber then im a backstabber. only im not sure when it was decided that your a backstabber if you dont like your friends girlfriend. whatever. I guess Ill leave Jay alone.
Glad to know how much my friendship meant to you man.
anyway.
i got a new uniform a shirt and a sweatshirt oh and a new catcher glove.
im pretty excited this is going to be a good year. I think i might head over to justins. not really sure.
laters

1 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2004 18 March :: 6.18 pm

fuck this school, like seriously
you try to have a serious conversation with Mr.a he just like wont listen to a word i say and im only 17 so it dosent mattter when a teacher singles me out and screams at me
well fuck that
i wont take it anymore
yell at me again babbitt
ill lay into you like youve never had it
you fucker
thsi is liek the worst day ever.
i fucking hate cedar springs
why did i ever have to move here
i remember when i was happy what happened to that.
well softball
in an hour and a half and ive got homework to do.
so laters

Catch a Star

:: 2004 11 March :: 6.29 pm

ahh im tired
and bored
but im caught up on all my homework
i did ONE of my detentions
I got a new cell phone which is nice
on another note
i decided that im going to start treating people the way they treat me
im not sure if maybe i feel like im nicer than I really am
but heres what it is.
i feel like when i say im going to do something i do.
i wish some of you had the same consideration for me.
and as far as it goes
fuck you.
ive got lots of frustrations i guess.
whatever
its all a mix.
like the whole feeling like im not appreciated and that im only a convenience friend
and then there is the whole like issue
of like i dont know
i know how i feel and i was about to like let this guy know.
then like something came up and now i cant.
and i really kinda wish he knew
but theres nothing i can do now
live in my own world some more
not like i havent been living there for a long time.
ill get over it I always do.
see like I was at this place before and i got over it.
and then when there was like a smidgen of a chance again.
bam. there i go.
hhmm
ill get over it like i said.
so im going to go comfort myself with material objects.
laters
loves and hugs

Catch a Star

:: 2004 10 March :: 7.18 pm

Where does it end really.
Im always thinking and here is what ive come to even though I know its not really anything.
I ahve concluded that I had something good.
I threw it away.
that sucks
and the big question was why?
it isnt what I wanted.
What I wanted was there in front of me the whole time.
but I could never have what it is I really wanted.
I almost had it once.
then I messed up and didnt get it.
so in the end where do I go from here.
damn.

Catch a Star

:: 2004 10 March :: 7.08 pm

Hey im quizzing cuz im that bored






Crazy Bitch


What Kind of Girl Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


Go for it! You guys are compatable and know
eachother well enough to have a good
relationship.


Should You Date Your Close Friend?
brought to you by Quizilla


A GARAGE-GURL. Youre into loud music, hot guys and
wild fashions. Youre most at ease when you've
got all your mates around you and you like to
party. Boys are a game and youre always on the
ball because you make sure youre always number
one.
Your virtues: Confidence, fun nature, sociability.
Your flaws: Loudness, jealous tendency, need for
attention..



What kind of girl are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


Lonliness dominates you. You can hide it well, but
its there, and your friends can see it. You
constantly feel alone, and need to do things to
fill your time. Your afraid to tell people
this, but sooner or later it gets out in a bad
way, and you think you screwed up everything.
And when you are in love is when you are sad
the most. (Please Vote)


What Emotion Dominates you?
brought to you by Quizilla


Your: Happy eyes! Your cheerfull, bright and always
want to try something new. Your inquisitive and
quite lovable. You have many friends and will
succseed in life.


What type of eyes do you have?
brought to you by Quizilla

Catch a Star

:: 2004 10 March :: 3.29 pm

well this an awesome half day.
we all went to boxs and that was fun
we all minus the jay and james and well lots of other people
but there were lots of people there too.
i had a good time in conclusion.
chinese is fun as well
on another note
the unfaltering thing that is in my life and has been for what seems like forever but is really only like months. well its back
and it makes me a little sad
but not too sad
although i know in the end ill be the one hurt like always.
its weird how you know something is bad for you yet you dont do anything to get rid of it.
meh
in the end
i still care
and always willj.
so shoot me

Catch a Star

:: 2004 8 March :: 7.17 pm

hey nothing new
loves
lizzy

Catch a Star

:: 2004 8 March :: 12.04 pm

hye im in chemistry
bored
the weekend was good.
great actually
this whole chris, the manager, thing
getting a little out of hand.
eh
whatever though.
Ive really gotta shape up and like stop doing bad stuff but I havent snuck out in a long time so.
cool
i just need to stop the other stuff
chris is skeevy.
kinda a turnon
but i can do better
who am I fooling
not me
I know hwat I want and I know I can get it.
I dont know if I should get it though.
eh
laters
loves and hugs

Catch a Star

:: 2004 6 March :: 8.48 pm

I am so fucking stoned.
I smoke three fucking gibbers at 330
Im still ripped as hell
and its like 8ish.
oh man
I love my brothers and sisters.
it was a family affair
well
julie, joel tracey and i
we left out shane and tori
I love them

Catch a Star

:: 2004 6 March :: 12.16 pm

Hey I am at moms.
everyone is going to be here today and that is cool
I officially retired from the group in case someone didnt know.
I am going to fulfill my lifelong destiny of being a prep.
I will wear more abercrombie and get good grades.
I will start to hang out with the likes of the "popular" people or at least the smart people.
I hope that in this pursuit I wil find something new.
someting good to make me happy

2 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2004 4 March :: 7.49 am

well.
here I am
Its first hour yet Im at home
you know how sometimes you just dont want to be at school.
today is one of those days.
maybe everyone noticed (or maybe not) that ive been a little bitchy and not myself lately
Let me explain.
I broke up with james
you guys may or may not understand my reasoning for this.
I dont feel that I have to explain myself.
and I know that you guys think that james is cool and everything but dont invite me somewhere without letting me know that hes gonna be there.
like yesterday you invited me to the paintball shop and he was gonna be there.
no thats not really cool
one of the reasons I broke up with him is because I felt like we were together too much.
Im seeing more of him now than I was before i broke up with him.
and yeah I do feel like you guys are trading me in for him, Ill be honest about it no matter how irrational it sounds.
and it really hurts my feelings because im the one thats supposed to be your friend.
I know it sounds petty but its really the way I feel at this point.
so yeah.
thats all ive got.
laters and loves.
lizzy

4 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2004 1 March :: 7.17 pm

i am mad tired.
just replied to james.
ugh this whole thing gives me headaches.
like wow.
what can i do to change this.
i dont know
please dont point out the obvious though.
anyway.
this whole thing.
i just dont even knwo anymore
but im talking to mitch armstrong so ill catch you guys later.
loves and hugs
lizzy

Catch a Star

:: 2004 29 February :: 2.15 pm

It's funny how I find myself
In love with you
If I could buy my reasoning
I'd pay to lose
One half won't do



im not sure anymore.
i do things and I dont know why
the reasoning seems good when I do it, then everything sucks
and im all hey stupid you can fix this
but what if I do, and then it happens again. and in the end everyone will end up hating me.
i wish I had some sense.
mostly sense in what it is im doing because I just dont anymore. im all talking to myself like
LIzzy you had something great going for you and you just dropped it. what am I.
GGGGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH
and so I feel like shit.
I am a bitch adn just a shitty horrible BASTARD
egh
if i could change this i would, but i cant.
for myself i cant.
and i look at like box and what he did to me.
and now I understand.
I understand where he was coming from.
but anway
I saw the passion
it was good but i never want to watch it again
it was gruesome
made me sick
made me cry(i was on the verge of crying when i went anyhow)
and mostly it made me think
and made me rethink atheism
isnt that horrid.
but anyway i strongly urge you all to see it.
Loves
Lizzy

1 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2004 28 February :: 5.54 pm

I wish that I was a better than I am.

Catch a Star

:: 2004 28 February :: 4.36 pm

well here I am. one more time
im selfevaluating/
ive evaluated.
Im a bitch, and a horrible person.
I push away all those that are close to me>
why is this, in case you didnt know, my mother who is certifiably crazy. well she is always doing something overdosing, or being found with a gun in her mouth. things along those lines.\
that may have something to do with it.
then I have to consider my history.
my sexual history.
you can call me a whore if you want to.
its okay.
when I look at it. I kinda am.
only i wont fuck just anybody.
every guy I ever did anything with, I cared about at one point.
maybe now i have resentment towards some of them. but really. i had my reasons for doing it.
and this i also feel has something to do with it.
by messing around with guys I feel acceptance.
I am sussie fucking high school
the typical teenage girl looking to be accepted by guys around her.
so while im pushing people im also pulling them towards me.
if Im a bitch to you. please dont hate me for it.
Im trying i really am.
im going to be more honest
with myself and with you guys.
im glad to know that my true friends are still here even though im a bastard and justin put it so well.
okay
loves

1 stars caught | Catch a Star