I've been playing dead my whole life

you think about yourself too much and you ruin who you love

I've been playing dead my whole life

:: 2017 23 July :: 1.00am

i just want to give myself to love completely

but there's something holding me back

as of yet a nameless creature stalking me silently from the shadows

went to a beautiful wedding today one where i felt the desire to share my heart in front of those i fear the judgement of the most

i want to bear my heart to someone

but fear leaves me standing in shade waiting for the beast to take me

creep

godessalthena

:: 2017 20 July :: 12.28am

leaden wights pulling down on the corners of my broken heart
i harden to an icy black cold
shut down drowning the right words to say

vacuucuous hollow hole deep inside
where once was something pink and full

what is the future when you can't find a voice
hiding behind medicine enveloping conciousness
mirrors reveal a strange mystery

left thrashing furiously against the endless depth
leviathan melancholy
swallows the world whole

creep

godessalthena

:: 2017 19 July :: 11.54pm

im in a shite mood.

never ever moving to the same town as those people.

i don't think i could handle it

creep

godessalthena

:: 2017 18 July :: 10.15pm

it's hard not to feel somewhat bitter seeing everyone around you realizing your dreams while you are stuck on a hamster wheel.

i work so hard and i get nowhere

everyone around me works hard and gets to move forward

what's wrong with me

creep

godessalthena

:: 2017 16 July :: 6.01pm

i have yet to see much of a difference between america and canada! gas is sold in an odd way. people still drive like buttholes.

it's been nothing but wind and smoke since we got here.. ahhhhh feels like home!

creep

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