:: 2003 14 April :: 9.16 pm

mirror<_______>rorrim

time<_______>emit

does not<_______> ton seod

exist<_______>tsixe

look at your clock. and think of what those numerals mean. digits by which we base our lives around. a false constant. just like all the other fictional apparatus we add into the mix. "Time" as we know it is a measurement of something that is infinite. whet en oxymoronic perception.

3 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 10 April :: 9.55 pm

shankfucious top 5 movie picks:

1. The Legend of Douchebagger Vance
2. Jeympity Jones and The Temple of Do-Me.
3. Douche-mosis Jones
4. Jeympageddon starring Bruce Flinkis.
5. Planet of The Jeympes.

I should be doing my homework. Instead i fill this time by creating fictional movies or thinking of them based on our fictional discourse. Atrophy of the mind. Or perhaps expansion. or maybe. there is no such thing. as either. and we are all fucking insane. living by invisible constants in a fictional realm.

1 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 8 April :: 12.00 am

shank: where the fuck do you think we are.
girl: on errrth duh. in florida.
shank: no you dumb fuck. in both a dimensional and mental state. where are we.
girl: umm dimension.you mean like the twilight zone?

how people turn into these automatons. intriguing. just thinking of the entropy of human nature. and how standing on this earthen floor i still dont feel like i am anywhere.

Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 7 April :: 9.54 pm

reverrrbb. selur eht etirw-re. my friend billy pilgrim said to ignore the negative. word to you billy.

dew yew realize that around the world peeple are shewting one another? because of stewpid negative fucks who cant get along. fucking queers man.

shankfucious say: throw out external influences. and listen to yourselves more often.

2 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 5 April :: 8.41 am

killing somoene is never realized in your mind until you can no longer see them. and once you have realized you killed someone. you develop a hunger for recessitating them. and just as killing them was once your goal, fixing your foul deed now is. only their insides have decomposed into a disfiguration far beyond recessitation. so we dig a grave to bury the past. dress in black and perhaps say a few words. and soon after forget what once was.

i should be working out. but the phone never rang. ive lost credence in friends. doesnt matter.

2 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 31 March :: 9.17 pm

nostalgic fever. longing for old escapades on endless nights. for the days when the sunrise bore hope. days before i became addicted to painkillers. before machines started turning human. times when i enjoyed looking into the night sky. times when you guys made up stepdad quest and i thought you were so gay. when i swiffed fuckin pebbles. when we whined and giggled like little girls playing silent hill 2. when we watched golfballs and blocked all the roads. when i fell in the shower. when the demon light would make us run. when you got caught in my closet. when we toilet papered the baseball field and mummified you. when we put shampoo bottles everywhere. (sorry) when we smoked black and milds and bitched about life. when hong kong fooey got us into some dumb ass movie. when we beat up the ashtray but only you got caught. when we played halo until 5 in the morning. when we bought douches because we have lost our minds.

haha. ill never forget it all.

2 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 26 March :: 10.51 pm

e
d
i n
s w
p o
u d

sdrawkcab.

direction is relative. what is one man's left is another man's right. what is percieved as ones downfall is in anothers eyes their uprising. keep in mind that what you see is merely one interpretation of the whole. however, inspite of this, one usually takes to the belief that their was is the only way to see things. we get so arrogant in our views. closing minds and boarding up the entrances once an opinion has been formed. sdrawkcab eb yam siht uoy oT. Only because that is the way you have been taught to percieve things. so hows about you try. break the mold. dna yfed niotpecrep.

consider this paradigm. do you see the following as evil or as live? it all depends on your perception. after all. life is how you make it. break through it all.

e
.....v
.........i
............l

3 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 25 March :: 10.24 pm

when you live. you leave nothing but broken hearts.

2 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 24 March :: 11.19 pm

time runs through our veins. (it starts and stops and starts and stops again)

thinking corrupts life. im sorry i dont care anymore. but you arent worth it. (this isnt about you). our lives are trench warfare. venturing out now and then to engage in a fight. but in the end we always return to the trenches. afraid of exposure to the outside world. afraid of being hit by anything. the funny thing is. these words will fall on a blank mind. idontknowwhyiwritethese. just a dead letter marked return to sender.

and with my head submerged, everything fell silent. i shuddered because i thought you had left my mind. but i'd never allow that.

1 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 22 March :: 5.46 pm

here's something to think about. (blank space)

getthe picture? no one does. it all just a series of repeating cycles. on your death bed you will see what i have long before. it does not matter however. traversing the untimely walls of this world amounts to nothing anyhoo. i'm losing my grip as i trip on anomilies. i'm sick of painting in black and white. i had a crazy dream this afternoon. and i guarentee it is the result of things to come if the course remains unwavering. this trip has taught me something. and that is if someday i have a kid of my own, he will believe in some religion. he will be the typical societal product, rooted in his beliefs and on a set course, so when he dies he can die feeling he has lived for a purpose. yes. he will have a "good" life. he will be my contrast. he will be my purpose. something "good" that i have accomplished. humans are nice beings. and i no longer know what i am talking about. adieu.

1 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 18 March :: 7.29 pm
:: Mood: fucking gay

damn this sucks. denver and the area where i am supposed to be got anywhere between 3-8 ft of snow today. worst snow theve ever gotten in one day. and it all had to happen the day i go there. dah. so now im stuck in st louis. we try to leave here tomorrow at 930 but even by then the airport may still be closed. most likely i wont even get to breckenridge til thursday or friday, and friday is the earliest ill be able to ski most likely. fucking worthless. hey guys thanks for calling me like you said you would. it was cool hanging out. fuck this shit goddamn dahh. how fin. <3. do a dance for me.

5 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 17 March :: 11.22 am

a singular needle inflicts a prick. needles amassed can inflict fatalites. keep this in mind when passing glances. it is often the overlooked pebble that topples giants.

last day in florida. ill miss all the queers. get all the dunyans out of your systems. i wojnder which word will have replaced dunyan when im back. <3

1 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 11 March :: 8.22 pm

we all are just drowing in an empty ocean. rehearsing for a nonexistant play. holding on to a rope of water. somehow i find comfort in nothingness. i bathe in a vat of existentialism, bound to nothing, by nothing. i have grown into a shadow of my former self. floating on a pillar of air. dreaming of how all the lies came to be.

10 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 6 March :: 8.48 am
:: Music: fuel- jesus or a gun

3 People Fired | Ready..Aim..

:: 2003 2 March :: 12.30 pm

life is wearing me down. draining me of energy. depression wears a strange face. last night this dead end sign stuck in my fucking mind. repeating over and over again. everything is a dead end. reality is such a bitch.

2 People Fired | Ready..Aim..