jedibumblebee
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2023 2 January :: 11.50pm
:: Music: Sia- Chandelier
I'm gonna live like tomorrow don't exist
Party girls don't get hurt
Can't feel anything, when will I learn?
I push it down, I push it down
I'm the one for a "good time call"
Phone's blowin' up, ringin' my doorbell
I feel the love, feel the love
One, two, three, one, two, three, drink
One, two, three, one, two, three, drink
One, two, three, one, two, three, drink
Throw 'em back 'til I lose count
I'm gonna swing from the chandelier
From the chandelier
I'm gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist
Like it doesn't exist
I'm gonna fly like a bird through the night
Feel my tears as they dry
I'm gonna swing from the chandelier
From the chandelier
But I'm holding on for dear life
Won't look down, won't open my eyes
Keep my glass full until morning light
'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight
Help me, I'm holding on for dear life
Won't look down, won't open my eyes
Keep my glass full until morning light
'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight
On for tonight
Sun is up, I'm a mess
Gotta get out now, gotta run from this
Here comes the shame, here comes the shame (ah)
One, two, three, one, two, three, drink
One, two, three, one, two, three, drink
One, two, three, one, two, three, drink
Throw 'em back 'til I lose count
I'm gonna swing from the chandelier
From the chandelier
I'm gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist
Like it doesn't exist
I'm gonna fly like a bird through the night
Feel my tears as they dry
I'm gonna swing from the chandelier
From the chandelier
But I'm holding on for dear life
Won't look down, won't open my eyes
Keep my glass full until morning light
'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight
Help me, I'm holding on for dear life
Won't look down, won't open my eyes
Keep my glass full until morning light
'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight
On for tonight, on for tonight
'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight
Oh, I'm just holding on for tonight
On for tonight, on for tonight
'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight
'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight
Oh, I'm just holding on for tonight
On for tonight, on for tonight
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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2022 23 December :: 3.44am
I keep dreaming of us living in different places together.
I dream that you are all torn up, that you're broken and sad.
I hurt for you, with you. I do miss you.
"you once called me forever, now you still can't call me back"
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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2022 26 November :: 1.35pm
https://youtu.be/iWG6apzIWAk
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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2022 17 November :: 4.11pm
when every song puts me into your point of view
each tune is a tune i wish I could share with you
but you had to go fuck it all up
Point and Shoot
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jedibumblebee
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2022 11 November :: 10.56pm
If the stars were edible
And our hearts were never full
Could we live with just a taste?
Just a taste...
Point and Shoot
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jedibumblebee
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2022 26 October :: 9.01pm
:: Music: AJR- Karma
You say that I'm better, why don't I feel better?/ The universe works in mysterious ways/ But I'm starting to think it ain't working for me
I've been so good, I've been helpful and friendly
I've been so good, why am I feeling empty?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
I've been so good, but it's still getting harder
I've been so good, where the hell is the karma?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
Why, are you asking me why?
My days and nights are filled with disappointment
Fine, oh no, everything's fine
I'm not sure why I booked today's appointment
I've been so good, I've been helpful and friendly
I've been so good, why am I feeling empty?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
I've been so good, but it's still getting harder
I've been so good, where the hell is the karma?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
What, am I normal or not?
Am I crazier than other patients?
Right, I've done everything right
So where's the karma doc, I've lost my patience
'Cause I've been so good, I've been working my ass off
I've been so good, still, I'm lonely and stressed out
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
And I've been so good, but it's still getting harder
I've been so good, where the hell is the karma?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
Ah-ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
I've been so good this year
I've been so good this year
Time, I know we're out of time
But what if sad thoughts come and I can't stop it
Bye, I don't wanna say bye
If only I could keep you in my pocket
To give me some diagnosis of why I'm so hollow
Please give me instructions, I promise I'll follow
I tripped on my ankle and fractured my elbow
But doesn't that mean that the tour's gonna sell though?
I try to explain the good faith that's been wasted
But after an hour it sounds like complaining
Wait don't go away, can I lie here forever?
You say that I'm better, why don't I feel better?
The universe works in mysterious ways
But I'm starting to think it ain't working for me
Doctor, should I be good?
Should I be good this year?
4 Shots |
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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2022 16 October :: 7.24pm
words are cheap.
anyone can say "I love you", but not many can show it
did you ever love me?
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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::
2022 7 September :: 4.25pm
:: Mood: pensive
When destiny calls you
You must be strong (you gotta be strong)
I may not be with you
But you've got to hold on
They'll see in time
I know
We'll show them together
1 Shot |
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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::
2022 12 August :: 8.48am
things are good, real good
yet I can feel the sword of damacles hanging over me
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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2022 25 July :: 10.23am
there has to be something wrong with me
1 Shot |
Point and Shoot
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jedibumblebee
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2022 1 July :: 9.11pm
:: Mood: anxious
:: Music: AJR- World's Smallest Violin
Now come in with the timpanis/ And take a shot of Hennessy/ I know I'm not there mentally/ But you could be the remedy
My grandpa fought in World War II
He was such a noble dude
I can't even finish school
Missed my mom and left too soon
His dad was a fireman
Who fought fires so violent
I think I bored my therapist
While playing him my violin
that's so insane
(Oh my God) that's such a shame
Next to them, my shit don't feel so grand
But I can't help myself from feeling bad
I kinda feel like two things can be said
The world's smallest violin
Really needs an audience
So if I do not find somebody soon
I'll blow up into smithereens
And spew my tiny symphony
Just let me play my violin for you, you, you, you
My grandpa fought in World War II
And he was such a noble dude
Man I feel like such a fool
I got so much left to prove
All my friends have vaping friends
They're so good at making friеnds
I'm so scared of caving in
Is that entertaining yеt?
that's so insane
(Oh my God) that's such a shame
Next to them, my shit don't feel so grand
But I can't help myself from feeling bad
I kinda feel like two things can be said
The world's smallest violin
Really needs an audience
So if I do not find somebody soon
I'll blow up into smithereens
And spew my tiny symphony
Just let me play my violin for you, you, you, you
Somewhere in the universe
Somewhere someone's got it worse
Wish that made it easier
Wish I didn't feel the hurt
The world's smallest violin
Really needs an audience
So if I do not find somebody soon
I'll blow up into smithereens
And spew my tiny symphony
All up and down a city street
While tryna put my mind at ease
Like finishing this melody
This feels like a necessity
So this could be the death of me
Or maybe just a better me
Now come in with the timpanis
And take a shot of Hennessy
I know I'm not there mentally
But you could be the remedy
So let me play my violin for you
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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2022 9 June :: 6.27pm
having one of those may I please die now days
1 Shot |
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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::
2022 24 April :: 9.07am
major life changes I'm not ready for are my least favorite
but respecting myself is more important to me than being loved, shy of 7 years I had to let you go.
I love you, the feelings don't just disappear. being sons you make me feel like I used to, but at the same time everything we have gone through leaves a disgusting bitter taste in my mouth.
I believe in you. all I have ever wanted is to see you succeed and take the life you deserve. but I started enabling the bad habits with no recourse. no one is innocent in the situation.
not how I wanted to spend my birthday, 4/20, or our anniversary. and soon you'll be back in the tricities and I won't have the option of just driving down and seeing you.
why do things have to come to this every time..? four long term relationships crashing and burning. each one gets worse and worse. every time I come back stronger, but a piece of my heart also rots away.
I'm just ready for something to be easy
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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2022 7 April :: 9.12am
I'm drowning in overwhelming sorrow
Point and Shoot
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godessalthena
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::
2022 12 March :: 8.42am
listening to a mix tape my sister made her (now-ex) boyfriend but never gave him. it's literally my favorite ever. the songs flow so perfectly, each one is beautiful and meaningful.
I've never made anything so wonderful. I often wonder if maybe I really am a waste of paint.. I don't make beautiful things, I am not thoughtful, I am a selfish Lil worm.
but somehow I still have so many absolutely remarkable people in my life, who genuinely love me for who I am, even at my most crazy, even when I make the same mistakes over and over again.
i saw a friend I hadn't seen in over two years, we went to Frank's and had mimosas, smoked a bowl in the parking lot, and finished with a cigarette. we laughed the whole time, and we have so much in common. I've really missed seeing her, and after I felt this bliss and joy I hadnt felt in a long time.
I've lost myself a little, and I'm having a hard time getting back up to the path, if there was ever a path in the first place...
not sure where I'm even going anymore.
Point and Shoot
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