<center>My Auto-Ethnography</center>

:: 2005 7 June :: 11.53am
:: Mood: melancholy
:: Music: AFI, Marilyn ,manson

Aloneness, again
it's been very weird for me this past few weeks. i, for once in my life for as long as i can remember, am between crushes!!! i don't actually "like" someone at the moment. i guess it doesn't really make much difference because usually the reason that you fancy (ahhh, i hate that word!) someone is because you want to start a relationship with them but when i have a crush on someone i am quite happy to admire from afar, i never "approch" someone because i know that no one ever feels the same way for me as i do for them- its just the way that the world works. i have accepted that and am content with it for now, sometimes, of course i feel a bit sad about it but what can ya do, huh? anyway, the reason that i bring this up right now is because i am worried. we just had half term and i spoke to none of my friends. not one. this makes me sad. i guess that this is the ideal oppotunity to lose touch with the people that you really don't like so i guess that no one REALLY liked me in the first place. im am of course- in case you didn't realise- feeling extreamely sorry for my self. i apologise to my non- existant audience.

5 Hey Miss Murder | Can I?

:: 2005 7 June :: 11.52am

101 Random Questions
Created by livi666 and taken 10 times on bzoink!
Basic Questions
First Name	Vicky
Last Name	Minney
Nicknames	Wiredshut, V, 45
Age	16
DOB	19/04/89
Hair Colour	black
Eye Colour	green with gold flecks
Height	5 ft 11.5"
When did you last...
Eat	9.35
Drink	12.05 last night
Kiss	properly? August 27, 2003
Hug	yesterday
Listen To Music	few minutes ago
Watched a movie	last night
cheated on a test	middle school
ran away from home	never
went to school	am here now
was sick	march 2004
talked to someone	chat? few mins ago. properly? can't remember
did your homework	can't remember!!!
had an exam	yesterday afternoon
went to the park	last week
hung out with friends	yesterday
talked to a friend	yesterday (not including txts)
used a mobile phone	this morning 10.15
emailed someone	can't remember
read an email	not for a long while...
Have you ever...
cheated off a test	yes
got in a fight with a friend	physical? no. arguement? yes.
ran away from home	no
skipped school	no
met a famous person	yes
lied to your parent	yes
passed a test	earlier in the year
failed a test	can't remember
went out of the country	june 2004
went out of the state	-
This or That...	That
pepsi or coke	pepsi
maccas or KFC	-
carrots or corn	carrots
Summer or winter	summer
spring or autum	spring- both
computer or cell phone	can i say both?
music or tv	music
horror or romance	horror
comedy or drama	drama
blue or pink	pink
pizza or pasta	pasta
new digital camera or new cell phone	new cell phone
cat or dog	cat
skirt or pants	pants
FAVOURITES
food	anything!!! chinese especially
drink	milkshake
month	may
day	thursday/ friday
holiday	summer and easter
actor	Jude law/ ewan mgreggor/ jonny depp
actress	Nicole kidman/ elisa dushku/ sarah michelle gellar
colour	black
subject	science
season	spring
music	rock
band	AFI
song	half jack- dresden dolls
movie	edward scissorhands/ queen of the damned
tv show	buffy the vampire slayer
animal(can say human u no)	then i will say human!
game	?
number	9
letter	V
Associate a friend with these words
Dumb	-
blonde	-
bitch	mira
slut	sarah
nicest	rosie
smartest	hmmm...
one u trust the most	rachelle
Word Associations
Blue	moon
Blonde	yuk
Cat	meow
Spider	man
Ring	2
Fry	deep
Computer	screen
lemonade	fizzy
cd	spin
monkey	ape
speaker	loud
boy	friend
cow	moo
Last 3 questions
What are you thinking?	thinking about answering this question
did you enjoy it?	yeah
what would you rate it?	5.
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:: 2005 5 June :: 7.41pm
:: Mood: calm

Computer Broken...
Updates may be few and far between for the next week or so (and maybe longer) since my computer is well and truly fucked. The system software seems to be corrupted, and I can't even start the thing up at the moment. I'm borrowing my mum's laptop when I can, but since it's her computer and all, I can't exactly spend my usual amount of time on the internet.

On the plus side, I get a lot more time for drawing, since I don't have much else to do, although it also means that I won't be able to work on my story much either. Thankfully I have a backup of the first chapter (I hope, anyway) so maybe I'll be able to get it posted to fictionpress.com within the next fornight (so much revision means I don't have as much time as I'd like for writing it,)

:: 2005 29 May :: 5.50pm
:: Music: Iced Earth - Damien

I upgraded my computer to OSX Tiger today, which was a bit of a hassle. I had to do a lot of rearranging of folders onto the standalone because I was left with under 3GB of disk space, which wasn't good because I like my computer to run reasonably well, even if it is old. I've got it up to 5GB now, which is better.

A couple of applications don't work now, unfortunately: Software Update (which is sort of important,) and Bittorrent (I promptly went and downloaded Tomato Torrent because I couldn't live without a Bittorent client!)

:: 2005 28 May :: 6.01pm
:: Mood: crushed
:: Music: Dresden dolls and t.a.t.u

boo hoo
ok. fine then. nobody loves me...

:: 2005 26 May :: 4.31pm
:: Mood: hot but cheerful
:: Music: dresden dolls

things
Hey everyone (or anyone), i have just had one of the best days ever!!! the simple things in life are definately the nicest! i had a resistant materials exam in the morning then i had lunch (don't worry this is going somewhere, honest) then me and rach went on the bus back to halesworth and had the nicest afternoon EVER!!!! It wasn't even that amazing really we just walked to this nice socluded (this is not going to get rude don't worry!!) place that was just like this grassy hill and sat in the boiling hot sun and just... did nothing! it was absolutely great!! yesterday i was in a bit of a foul mood and feeling a bit down but i was thinking today that this school year has not been bad- has not been bad at all!! i mean it obviously has not been perfect, theres been the down points such as art and loads of other stuff but i think that the good points might actually start to over take the bad soon... not yet but soon. few good points(not in order of what happened or what was best):

1. met rachelle (this is in order of best)

2. settled into myself, found my own look

3. feeling more confident

4. haven't done an amazing amount of things to make myself feel bad

5. exchanged a vast amount of telly with a vast amount of music- very good move

6. stopped letting others run my life (as much)

7. mums got right medication

8. bonded more with sisters

9. talked to sisters more- about everything

10. become less friends with mira than i was before- good move i feel

11. got this web journal!!!!!

12. became a bit more aware of the world

13. let old problems die (catherine)

who said 13 was unlucky?!

Extra (just before the beginning of last school year)

14. admitted my sexuallity to my self... the beginning of things getting better.

have thought LOADS less about sex this year, more about soppy romantic stuff (in my mind not in what i say to others) wierd, shouldnt it be the other way around, young person with childish dreams and older person with sex on the brain??

sorry about this really, really boring entry.

:: 2005 26 May :: 1.11pm

Sex Survey for the Repressed
Created by Lurath and taken 7181 times on bzoink!
The Basics
Male/Female	female
Heterosexual/homosexual/bisexual?	bisexual
Are you certain of your sexual orientation?	yes
If not, why arn't you? If you are, how do you know?	-
Your age	16
How often do you think about sex in a normal day?	uncountable times- actually less recently
How often do you think about other sexual acts besides intercourse?	more than i do about sex
Have you ever had sex?	yes
Do you like...
Vaginal sex	s' all right
Anal sex	never tryed...
Oral sex	ooh...
Fingering/handjobs	better than ooohhh...
Something not mentioned above that you like	anything and everything (joke)
Which of the above do you prefer?	better than ooohhh...
Intrests
What (if any) fetishes do you have?	dunno
Do you like sexual situations with more than one person?	ummm... not been in a situation like that
With several people of the same sex?	don't sound too bad...
The opposite sex?	hmmm...
Or even sexual situations with several people of diffrent sexes?	mmmmmmmm....
If you haven't tried any of the above, might you in the future? Why/Why not	maybe...
Do you have a steady partner?	no
Do you use protection?	yes
How important is foreplay to you	VERY!!!!
The Kiss
Do you like kissing people/a person?	YES!!!
What is your favorite part of kissing?	the sensations it produce
Tounge or no tounge?	tongue- definately
Where is the best place to be kissed (on your body)	mouth
Where is the worst place to be kissed (on your body)	uhh.. hadn't thought... maybe... ear?
Who do you wish you could kiss?	anyone i liked
How important is kissing in a serious relationship?	very- its so sensual and personal
And...
What's your favorite sexual position	missionary
Where is the oddest place you've ever had sex	tent.. only place... must go camping!!!
Where do you want to have sex	anywhere
Would you mind if people watched?	not if i dint know them and would never see them again
How important is sex in your life	not very- used to be fixated with it
Name a fantasy you have	school doors...
Do you like having sex...
With toys?	ummm...
In the dark or light?	dark
Outside?	maybe
In costume?	uhhh... not sure.. what costumes?
In bondage?	ummm...
Submissive/dominate?	submissive
With lubricant?	maybe
Flavored condoms?	what is the point?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
With anything else unusual?	maybe
Finally...
Do you like this survey?	not really
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:: 2005 26 May :: 12.34pm
:: Mood: unloved
:: Music: dresden dolls

someone leave me a message- please indicate that your out there, anyone... PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im lonely :-( how many people actually read this anyway? sorry ive not updated in a while, ill update soon

:: 2005 25 May :: 8.28pm
:: Mood: accomplished

Finished the lineart of my entry for a Naruto original character contest, now I just have to scan it.

I'm such a fruit juice addict... I drink the stuff constantly. I have a glass of pomegranate and blueberry juice at the moment. Ok.. I'll shut up until I've got something interesting to say or can be bothered to talk about my exams ^_^

:: 2005 24 May :: 2.19pm

you? a little different
Created by dratsum and taken 12 times on bzoink!
welcome starting stuff
how are you feeling?	calm
what is your name?	wiredshut
how old are you?	16
where were you born?	reading
you in more detail, school ect
school year?	11, soon to be lower 6th
school you attend?	bungay high
uniform?	black and white, black, red and silver tie
are you one of the populare people?	no!!!
if not, what are you then?	i hope an original but probably not
if so, do you like being popular?	-
any enimies?	dont know, hope not!!!
why?	-
faves.... has to be done
colour?	black and red
nail vanish colour?	black
outfit?	anything red black and white
item of clothing?	"nobody knows i'm a lesbian" t- shirt
memmory?	swimming at night, looking at the stars crying in the middle of the beach
place?	my room
dream?	-
person?	not person, people
band(s)?	AFI, MCR, dresten dolls, marilyn manson
song(s)?	the great disappointment, to the end, the leaving song part 2, this time imperfect and half jack
saying?	one foot in the gutter the other in the grave
sesson?	spring
worst/hates... every one has faves not many ever list hates
colour?	peach
nail vanis colour?	yellow
item of clothing?	anything that doesnt fit- makes me feel bad
memmory?	waiting to see if mum was dead
nightmare?	witch one- blood out of gravy- yuk
acsident?	-
place?	school changing rooms- my head
person?	fleur stones
sesson?	winter
personal junk
are you a people person?	sometimes
hang with friends much?	yes
what do you do in your free time?	stuff
have many frineds?	a few
count yourself as a?(goth/ punk/ chav/ emo...)	none- don't know goth if i could get away with it!
your role modle?	no one, i am my own person
kno anyone famos?	yes
your room
colour?	orange- soon to be red
stuff in it?	bed, wardrobe, dresser, TV (big),, dresser wardrobe thing, drawers
any posters?	yes
share it with any one?	no- thank god!!!
your p.c
background?	wiredshut
screensaver?	love your hate... ...hate your love
make? micrasoft/ mac/ lynex	microsoft
modle?	time
got a web journal?	yes
got a website?	no
a little more about you
sexuality?	bi
experiences?	males "all the way" girls nowhere
ever selfharmed?	yes
with what?	knife, scissors, razor blade
how?	cutting
why?	to complicated to explain
biggest fear?	mental illness, suffocation, beatles (bug not car)
biggest regret?	too many to list- don't know which is the biggest
biggest dream?	don't actually know.... will think about it and come back
like your self?	hmm...
in love?	no
play any musical instruments?	no :-(
hobbies?	ahhh... can't be bothered to go into this
have been abused?	no
ever had a crush?	yes
on who?	uncountable people
sorry a little to personal?	not really
what you think of?
war	bad
love	good
people thinking black (colour) is negitive?	STUPID
obbsesive fan girls	huh?
people who cheat	fuck them (not literally)
this survay?	v. good
naff wasn't it!?	no
i say this you say?
grey	sky
winter	grey
sun	bright
music	rocks
suiside	attempt
homasextual	gay
school	term
eyes	black
time	less
ok well that is the end
you think?	finally- i have done this 3 times now!!
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:: 2005 24 May :: 12.59pm

:: 2005 21 May :: 8.31pm

Ok, as much as I despise the Eurovision Song Contest, and won't watch it unless my parents demand I view a particularly 'interesting' act, I have to say that Norway's entry was pretty funky. By Eurovision standards, that is.