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2007 2 October :: 10.52am
So, I woke up extra early to read the rest of my novel and write my paper. I read for an hour, all grumpy that I'm up, and I finally decide I'm going to skip my first class so i can go to the library to write my paper. I get to the library, check my email, and the class that I had to write the paper for was canceled.
I had a feeling.
Oh, and I was walking back from class, and there were these two people standing at one of the main intersection side walks with big signs about signing a petition for a ballet initiative for medical marijuana, so i signed it.
This has been a good morning.
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2007 1 October :: 2.25pm
They are demolishing the building next door. It's the twin of the apartment building that we live in. They took a crane and started scraping and raking at it, and it came down, foot by foot, in a cloud of dust.
It makes me upset by the destructive nature of our culture. I honestly don't think there was anything wrong with that building, other than it was forty years old. They just want to put up something new that they can charge three times as much for.
Thus, the downfall of our capitalist society, we destroy things that are perfectly fine in search of the almighty dollar.
Except that dollar is quickly losing value.
I don't know what my point is. I get so depressed when I think about money.
That reminds me, the new Meijer contract is out. I should go read it and find out how much more they're screwing me over. Honestly.
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2007 1 October :: 11.25am
I hate the girl that sits next to me in communication theory. She always comes in, much more loud than she should, sits down, sprawls out, and reeks of cigarette smoke. That's when she is feeling well enough to show up.
It's a lecture hall and the seats are really small and close together, and she insists on sitting sidesway in the chair, so not only does she take up all of her space, but half of mine as well. I hate that I have to sit there for fifty minutes with her leg touching mine, knowing that she is looking at my notes and always saying the wrong answer when she gets called on.
I would move, but I'm not giving up my first row seat. Never.
It just irks me.
My public speaking class was canceled today, but I still have to stick around campus to meet with my acting partner so we can practice. Boo.
Tonight, fundraising meeting, and I have to put together my new folder that I bought. It's pink. I finally decided that I'm going to make this position my own, and I'm not going to use the previous Chair's folder anymore. It's a step toward empowering myself and building up the fundraising committee in the fraternity. It's a step, no matter if it's just a symbolic one.
It was raining and cold when I woke up this morning, and the government wasn't shut down. I was enthused by the first, disappointed by the second.
Looks like it's going to rain all day.
Michelle
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2007 30 September :: 11.01am
:: Mood: complacent
I just wanted you to know that I'm wearing the necklace and earrings you gave me two Christmas's ago for the first time. I thought they looked quite beautiful, and I just wanted you to know.
I love you, and I'll see you tonight.
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2007 29 September :: 11.20pm
:: Mood: blah
Rueben has left to go to a party. I'm watching fourty eight hours and cruising the internet, and going to sleep very soon.
Supposedly a woman drugged her husband, shot him, cut him up with a circular saw, stuffed him in a couple suit cases, and threw him in the Chesapeake Bay.
That's what I call tough love.
I laid in bed all morning after I got home from my homecoming responsibilities. It was wonderful to snuggle up in my fuzzy bathrobe while Rueben made me whole wheat pancakes with real maple syrup.
There are drunk people in the hall of my apartment. I'm use to it by now. It's a million times better than the dorm.
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2007 27 September :: 1.08pm
:: Mood: amused
The settling has finally come. I'm settled into this semester: my classes, work, schedule, just settled.
It's a big relief. I can handle it all. I am handling it all. I've been very productive in the past few days getting out cook books that the frat is doing for a fundraiser. It's a big fiasco. They were suppose to be here in February; they arrived the end of August. We also have no mailing information for the people that ordered them. So, it's my job, with just a name and the amount they paid, to track them down. I had four left. Now I only have one.
If anyone wants to buy a Chippewa Marching Band cook book, let me know. It's twelve dollars. It has lots of good recipes in it, including drinks.
We still have to sell 180. Oh god.
But I'm going to the Alumni 'tent' on the morning of Homecoming at seven in the morning to set up a table in hopes that some alumni will want to buy them. We need to sell a lot to break even.
Classes are going well. I got my exam back in my public speaking class and, with extra credit, I got a 100, which was a huge relief. I have a high B or low A in just about all my classes. Some classes haven't really had any assignments, so I'm not sure yet.
Work is going better. I know people now. I know who to ask for what, and the rules and everything. I basically know what I'm doing. And, I'm giving away a lot of my hours, or asking for at least one day off a week (which they give me!), so I'm not working the ungodly 32 hours a week that I could.
Oh, and we're coming home for red flannel.
Michelle
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2007 22 September :: 11.31pm
I feel like shit because I'm sick. I knew it was coming. I knew it. And I had to work, and of course that meant that I had to close the desk, thus working until eleven.
And I'm not going to lie. I shut down the pc at the desk, and when I left, the SC was trying to get on it to flip the lanes over for tomorrow. And I shut the computer down, so he had to wait for five minutes for it to reboot. I just smiled and him and walked a little faster. Wow. I'm a bitch.
But seriously, I thought he already had it done.
Whatever.
I'm over it. And I'm going to go take a shower. A nice warm, steamy shower. Well, maybe not so steamy because it's like seventy five degrees in here already....
And today was just like yesterday,
You couldn't even tell the difference,
You said all the same things you always say,
And tomorrow will be the same.
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2007 20 September :: 1.11pm
Frida Kahlo.
Selma Hyack with a unibrow. I wanted to shave it during the whole movie....we watched "Frida" for the past two classes in my English 333, Literature of Latin America class. If you want to see Selma's boobs...oh, and her having sex with another woman...it's the movie for you; but I digress. It really is a good movie, and yes, sex is a fairly good chunk of it. Frida was married to Diego Rivera, the famous Mexican Muralist.
I was entranced with the movie. I need to see it again. I think I need to see it a few times before I'll be satisfied that I've thought about the things in it.
Everyone should see it if they get a chance.
Warning: There is a bit of gore (i.e. when she gets pierced through the vagina with a handrail from a bus during an accident).
Happy viewing.
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2007 15 September :: 10.32pm
When I'm back home I feel weird. I'm a totally different person. I honestly feel like I'm in high school again. A perpetual senior.
I don't know what it is. Maybe just being around the familar, my house, the road where I live.
I'm surprised that, as much as I hated high school, I am as fondly nostalgic as I am about it.
I have to study for my exam for foundations of communication theory. I think this might be a tough one. Communicationt theory is not my thing at all.
I found out last night that I'm getting a Little. That's a prospective member of the fraternity and I'm her "Big" brother that's suppose to help her through the initiation process over the next twelve weeks. I'm very happy, but I don't feel old enough. She and I are the same age.
I guess we'll see how it works out.
I'm doing well in my "big girl" english class. It's literature of non-western cultures, and I'm one of three sophomores in the class (everyone else is a junior or senior). We had to write a five hundred word paper (critical analysis) on a novel. The average score in the class was 37/50, and I got a 47/50...AND she asked me to send her an anonymous version of my paper so she could put it online as an example for the other kids in class....this makes me happy.
Michelle
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2007 12 September :: 2.12pm
The best feeling in the world is to wake up in the morning and go to Rueben's room, lay next to him, and feel his warm, sleepy arms tightly curl around me.
That's what love is all about.
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2007 12 September :: 12.39pm
The big drama in my life right now is tracking down a two thousand dollar scholarship that I was suppose to be getting from the university for academics, but they took off my financial aid for apparently no reason.
I'm just fine without the scholarship, but I would still like the money.
If I could get this scholarship back, then I could quit my job and just focus on school and the frat.
That would be nice.
I've been fairly overwhelmed with work and school and the frat...and I would love to be able to just focus on school and the fraternity...which I love dearly.
We had open rush last night and nineteen people signed up to get more information. That means we might have about twelve people rush this week! Yay!
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2007 10 September :: 8.37am
Wheatland was amazing. I got some henna tattoos and made a hemp necklace, and wore my Mike Gravel T-shirt and had people ask me about him. I listened to a ton of great music and danced a little, too. I also got a little obsessed with Llamas...but that's a story for another day.
I have class in about an hour. I haven't done any homework for a while. I'm slacking. This is going to be a busy week. But I'm still on a Wheatland/Hippie high.
Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?
[on Mike Gravel shirt, not my own genius]
It's so shitty that Mike Gravel won't win. I shouldn't say he won't. There is always the possibility that someone will shoot the eight candidates that are in front of him. But, until he is totally out of the race, I will do everything I can do educate people on his existence and stances. I'm surprised that I haven't talked about him more on here. I want him to come to speak at CMU. That would be the shit.
Mike Gravel:
Exposed the Pentagon Papers
Filibustered for five months to help end the draft
Alaska Senator in the seventies
Anti-War
Pro-Choice
Full LGBT rights (including marriage)
Universal Healthcare
Fair Tax
Decriminalize minor drug offenses and emphasis prevention and rehabilitation instead of jail
Honest....
Seriously, visit www.mikegravel2008.us
If you like him...let me know...I'll make you a shirt or something.
Also, facebook groups Mike Gravel 2008 and Rock08.
Or, add him as a friend on facebook.
Check it out.
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2007 6 September :: 11.06am
Sitting in the UC, eating my salad....
I went to the financial aid office and asked them where my honors scholarship was...the two thousand dollars that they took off my financial aid for no apparent reason, that I don't really need, but would like for rent and such.
They said they'd get back to me.
After this, I'm going to pearce computer lab to type up some minutes from my fundraising com. meeting and to print off my grade report and class schedule for the secretary (so they know I'm really in band and I have a good enough GPA to be in the frat).
Then, I might go home for a bit...but I have my acting class at two, then a pre-ed major meeting at six, a play to watch at seven thirty, and then my frat meeting at nine thirty. Then we're going to go shopping to get food and supplies for wheatland, which is tomorrow.
So busy...
I hope it rains tonight. I hope the rain comes pouring down and makes little puddles on my window sill.
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2007 28 August :: 4.40pm
16 credit hours + Fraternity + 20 hr/wk work = overwhelming?
I had to pretend to forge through strawberry jello in my acting class.
I want strawberry jello now.
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2007 26 August :: 6.22am
The earth is still.
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2007 24 August :: 10.12pm
The job is going better. I've gotten over most of the ackward phase where you're not sure exactly where you fit in and who acts like what. They only gave me three days next week, which is fine because i have sixteen credit hours this semester. I'm looking forward to staying busy.
It's been really hot out and the apartment doesn't cool off easy at night, so even though it's seventy out right now, it's still eighty five in here...but there are fans, which help.
It's about time to go to bed; I have to work in the morning. I fall asleep to the sound of sirens and tires hitting the pavement: my own genre of urban music.
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2007 22 August :: 2.08pm
It was warm out today. Too warm. Fark news: Redheads may become extinct because of global breeding (rueben says it's old, but I still find it disheartening).
My kind is going extinct. oh noes!
We went and bought our books today. It was upsetting. Just about three hundred for me, four for rueben.
At least my acting class doesn't have a book.
Miners? Yeah, they're definately dead by now.
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2007 20 August :: 8.29am
I haven't disappeared into the chasm known only as mt. pleasant. I'm here. really. I just don't have internet because my apartment apparently has wireless and my computer is too old to do that.
First day of work went well. the apartment is great. lonely, but rueben will be here soon.
I thought i had a lot more to say. i certainly did when i was thinking in the shower this morning...
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2007 15 August :: 12.22pm
:: Mood: complacent
Change is upon us.
I leave on Friday to move into my apartment in Mt. Pleasant. Classes start on the twenty seventh, Wheatland is the weekend of the seventh, the shower is before my brother's wedding which is on the thirteenth of October.
Then comes my parent's moving.
When I come back for Christmas, I'll have a new house in a new place. Actually, it'll just be the place I'm staying until I move on again.
All the lists and the planning in the world can't quench my anxiety.
I'm happy that Rueben and I will be living together. It'll be nice to be with someone I can get along with.
Oh, what am I doing? Rambling on like this? Another symptom of my anxiety, I guess. I have to go pack. I'm behind. And I have a dentist appointment in an hour and a half.
Here I go, out into the world/ Looking, searching, for something to/ Hold Onto.
Michelle
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2007 13 August :: 3.02pm
Odd moods. Misaligned Chakra, or something? Not sure.
I have lots of packing to do. I wish I didn't have so much stuff.
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2007 8 August :: 7.25pm
:: Mood: bouncy
:: Music: Pretty Baby - Vanessa Carlton
It's amazing how some make up, music, and clothes can put me in a good mood. I was rummaging through my closet looking for 'lost clothes' - clothes that i haven't worn in a long time, but still like. I couldn't find any, so i decided pull out my luggage that's been in there since i got back from college this spring...and i found it full of clothes that i forgot about! And it's all cute stuff, too, and, i tried on some pants that didn't fit in april, but fit now! (even though I'm bloated to the gills). I didn't really gain any weight when I went to college, but i've lost about ten pounds this summer, so all my stuff fits a lot better! AND I put on make up and covered up my zit that comes every month from hormones and trimmed and shaped my eye brows and curled my hair a little while listening to some up beat music and I FEEL HAPPY!
I know, girly stuff. Ew.
In other news, I painted my old night stand/ small bookshelf silver and wrote quotations about books on the sides and top of it in black permanent marker. It looks really awesome, and the great part is that the words cover up the horrible paint job. I realized that 1. I'm bad with spray paint and 2. I didn't get enough. Oh well, it's done now, and it's not john deere yellow anymore, thank god.
I talked to a Brother from the frat last night and got a little anxious and guilty about an upcoming project, but I feel better now that I realize that I didn't do anything bad, and now, after thinking on it a bit, I realize that it's not so terrible, or difficult, or terribly diffcult, or rather, not as much as i supposed it to be earlier.
I'm excited for the next couple weeks. Transitions! I'm leaving my Meijer, moving into my first REAL apartment, and starting up at a new Meijer with new people and new drama and new everything. I'm really happy with the classes that i'm signed up for, and really excited about band again. AHHH!
Michelle
[edit] This happy entry brought to you curtesy of off-brand midol.
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2007 6 August :: 1.32pm
:: Mood: cold
Back to the simplest terms: listing
Things I hate:
Wasting ten minutes of my life arguing with a moronic, toothless old woman about the price of cheese she thought was on sale, but wasn't.
People who do a rolling stop at stop signs.
People who go before me when it's my turn at a four way stop.
People who pass me when I'm going the speed limit.
People who do the last three things within two minutes.
Feeling restless and uncertain.
Hot weather.
Going to work for a four hour shift.
I think that's it, for now.
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2007 30 July :: 9.50am
:: Mood: awake
My last day at the Rockford Meijer is two weeks away. I'm happy to get out of there. Everyone that's cool is leaving for college, too, anyway.
I'm finishing up on packing; I've been accumulating boxes. I'm excited, yet nervous. My first four days in my apartment are going to be alone because I have to move in early for work.
I keep on having dreams about it, the apartment, that is. Odd, odd dreams.
I'm going to the library today to donate some books. I'm trying to file my life down to a couple boxes that I can store at my parent's house until I'm thirty. Everything else will just be stuff that I need to live: clothes, make up, bedding, etc.; basically stuff I can fit in my car.
But my precious books. I'm leaving them. Donating most, saving the rest. They were my friends during those summer months when there was no school. Their stories helped me to reason, to analyze, to imagine. I know, I know, it all sounds so corny, but I guess that's only because there is truth in my statement.
But then there was critical analysis. It open up worlds of understanding for me, but it ruined me forever. Rueben is right. I can no longer read a book simply for a good story. I am constantly and incessantly analyzing whatever I can get my hands on: setting, characters, mood, tone, the list goes on...
And it's ruined for me. Simply ruined.
I traded the magic of a story for reason and analysis. I've discovered so many things through it, but that doesn't make it better.
Sometimes the best things in life are better left unexplained.
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2007 26 July :: 4.38pm
Oh, and today is my three year anniversary with Meijer.
I think I should get a couple of gallons of booze and celebrate.
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2007 26 July :: 4.24pm
:: Mood: contemplative
I finally have it all figured out. Well, for now, at least.
I got ahold of the Mt. Pleasant Meijer, and my first day there will be August 19th. I called my apartment place and arranged for early move in on the 17th (four days early, and an extra $68, but at least I'll have a job, now).
Now I just have to get the electric turned on and buy a shower curtain. Oh joy.
I've begun packing today. We're all moving on, and, fittingly, I'm listening to 100 years by Five for Fighting.
Charlie moved out today. He's gone. I'll be leaving in three weeks. I'll be gone. My parents are moving to their new house in October.
When I come back next summer, everything will be different. My parents are ignoring the fact that I might be coming back. Every time I talk about my bedroom in the new house, they correct me, saying that it's the "guest bedroom."
How horrible is that? I'll be a guest in my parent's house. I'm in limbo. I don't have a 'home'. There is my parent's house, and then the place(s) that Rueben and I will be renting for the next three or four years.
Unfortunatly, I get very attatched to places. I've lived in this house, in the same room, for my whole life. Going off to college helped a lot to break that attatchment, but still.....everything is changing...
It's just all so......scary.
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2007 22 July :: 11.06pm
:: Mood: pissed off
Today was definately a bad day. I worked from 10:45-7:15pm and there were tons of mean people. I was about on the verge of crying the whole day because one customer after another treated me like shit. There was an old man that came up to the counter and said "You charged me wrong," and marked off three items on his receipt that he didn't think rang up correctly. Of course, I thouroughly investigated it, and called the grocery department. He was wrong on all of them, he got the wrong kind, the wrong size, and looked a wrong sign. When i explained to him why each of his items was correct, he looked at me like I was the stupidest person in the entire world and then grabbed his receipt out of my hands and tromped away.
Then there was the Michigan Scanning Award lady. She got this doll that had a clearance sticker on it for 5.50. It said "originally 7.99, now 5.50," the only problem was, the item was originally 9.99, and rang up accordingly at 30% off to 6.20. I was sure that she must have switched the sticker, because that usually doesn't happen, so I said, and as follows:
"Hi, can I help you?"
"Yeah, this rang up wrong."
"Okay, let me see. Oh, this is the wrong sticker, were there more back there like this?"
"Yeah, there was another one right next to it" (she said this annoyed)
"Oh, Okay, well, let me call back there real quick and see what's going on."
And I processed the transaction while I was on the phone trying to get the guy back there to look for more so we could fix it and see if she was lying, but he couldn't find them.
"Did you want that back on your credit card?"
"Yeah, and you owe me five bucks"
"I know, you received the Michigan Scanning Award, so there is going to be extra money. Did you want that in cash or on your card?"
"On my card"
"Do you have it with you so I can put it back on there?" (we need the account number to put it back on)
I hung up with the guy from Toys.
"There you go, you're all set, six whatever has been credited back to your card"
"You owe me more money."
"Umm, actually, the difference was x amount, and here is the five dollars for the award" (I point it out on the receipt)
"You didn't give it to me"
"Yes, I did, it's right here" (I point again).
At this point I'm getting pretty pissed, so I walk away before I say anything else, plus I had to get on the computer to look up the item to see if we had any left.
So...at seven, fifteen minutes before I had to leave, I got called into the manager's office.
Manager- "I had a complaint about you, what can you tell me about a lady with a price adjustment"
Me- "Oh, that lady, yeah, she was really mean, and kept telling me I owed her more money, and I gave it to her, but she was mean to me"
"Well, I've called you in here because she said you were rude and that's not the first complaint I've gotten about you. That's actually the third where they said you were rude and snotty. Yeah, they all said you were snotty."
And he presents the following paper that I have to sign that goes into my permanant Meijer file:
Michelle, on 7-22-07, we received a complaint from a customer you waited on at the Service Desk. This customer said that you were very rude and snotty when confronted with a problem she had with an overcharge. Please realize that customer service is our top priority, and that it is your job to handle these delicate situations with tact. Additional incidents of this nature will result in further discipline up to and including termination"
So i signed the damn piece of paper (and I got to keep a copy for fond memories) and left the office, went into the bathroom and balled my eyes out. I was still crying when I left, and until about ten.
I'm just so frustrated. I did absolutely nothing wrong (I have a co-worker that was there when I was "rudely" helping the lady that backs me up saying that I was nothing but professional), and I get in trouble. This might even affect my transfer to the Mt. Pleasant Meijer that I'm relying on.
I was not rude. I may not have acted like her best fucking friend, but I was not rude. I might have been short with her because she was insulting my intelligence. Hmm. There's a thought.
Whatever. I almost wanted to go back and tell my manager to go fuck himself and quit, but unfortunatly, I need my job because I need the money for rent. I am so fed up with people.
Friday a guy threw his change at me because I had to call return checks to make sure it was okay to cash his payroll check (because the company was on a do not cash list). I made him wait like seven minutes because I was on hold. HE THREW HIS CHANGE AT ME!!!!
I do not deserve to be treated like a piece of shit, and then get blamed for being rude when I wasn't. Especially for a job that screws me over at every turn. I lost all my seniority because I went on educational leave to go to school. I kept my seniority to get my benefits, but I can't get those because I don't work enough because I don't have enough seniority to get enough HOURS!!! I've worked there for three fucking years and I make fucking minimum wage, the same amount that any person getting hired in gets....
I'm just so fed up with people fucking me over every fucking day.
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2007 19 July :: 12.33pm
:: Mood: contemplative
I saw Marty (Metzger) yesterday at Meijer. I didn't even realize it was him until I carded him (he was buying a tobacco product). He looked so worn down. Not out, just down. Then I realized, we had never met.
And it's so ironic that we went to the same high school and I knew of him, but not him, because everyone at Cedar knows of everyone else, but not as much as others. But I knew him, well, a little. I've read his woohu, and I've read Jessa's journals, and I've kept tabs on Clem's "journal" and watched her grow from a newborn into a curious toddler.
I know things in about his life that I shouldn't, because we've never actually met. It was the oddest realization in the world. The internet does strange things to our perceptions. I wanted to ask him how he was doing, and how Clem was, and then I realized, he doesn't know me, but I know him. He probably would have thought I was crazy. He might have recognized me as Charlie's little sister, but I bet he had no idea how much I knew. It was just one of those moments in life when you realize you know more than your suppose to, intimate details, really, and you're nothing but a stranger off the streets who shouldn't have such precious information.
I guess I could go on and on, but I think my point has been made. It just makes me wonder who reads MY journal that I don't know, but they know me. Have I ever run into them, not suspecting they know a touch of the interworkings of my brain? Have they wanted to ask me an intimate question about my life, but realized, seconds before the words were going to spill out, that they didn't have the right, or rather, the social allowance, to do such a thing? Did they realize they knew me, but have never met me? A wonder of the internet, I guess.
I had a creative burst last night, when all I wanted to do was sleep, of course. Here is a bit of it, and of course, all that stuff about copyrighting applies.
My mind is full
Overflowing
To the point of
Nearly Breaking.
The days to come
Have worried me
I have fretted, thought,
Become senselessly
Engtangled.
In situations
Times and places
That will never
Come to Be
Yet, here they are
In my mind.
Alternate Reality.
Cannot sleep
Mind overflowing
This and that
Tomorrows coming
And unprepared
Am I for
Tomorrow and after
And Forever After.
This planning,
incessant planning
Never.
Ceases.
I plan and fret
Plan and fret
A plan for every
Imaginable
Possibility
And then the rest.
I need to sleep
Stop planning Stop
racing Stop-
JUST STOP.
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2007 12 July :: 11.54pm
:: Mood: busy
I often circulate between two modes of myself. The first is carefree, living for the moment, passing by, still in the game, but on the bench for a while. The second is careful. As in full-of-care. The root of the word. Caring to the point of being downtrodden and worried by the state of the world and the direction of the human race. I'm in the second mode, and let me tell you why I'm weary tonight.
Since I've been working mostly nights lately, I've had the opportunity to watch a lot of C-Span and C-Span2. If you don't know, they are both television stations that broadcast, usually live, the goings on of both the Senate and the House of Representatives. Today, both bodies were discussing the Iraq war in different aspects-legislation to withdraw, veteran's affairs, and other such amendments. I was stuck to the television for almost three and a half hours flipping between the two channels (interspersed with the occasional local weather update from the weather channel). I also watched most of the President's speech today.
I'm usually a hardlined Democrat, but I haven't been quite sure of what to make of Iraq until today. As I watched the President talk of "his war," the war of "ideologies," I realized exactly why. I have been getting the story two different ways from two different places. I admit, I don't think we should have been there in the first place. No matter how many times you try to say it, Iraq had nothing to do with September 11. But, that is no longer the issue. We're there, and we can't change history.
As I was watching Mr. Bush, I realized his side of the arguement. He was explaining to the press that was eagerly pelting him with all kinds of questions, that Alqueda was in Iraq. He suggested that the Iraq government was failing because of the violence perpetrated by them. His reasoning was, get rid of Alqueda in Iraq (though, there isn't much evidence they are there, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt), and the country should be a fertile womb, ready to grow a cute little democracy just like the big kids over in America.
Then I flipped the channel to the Senate. One Senator from New York was demanding withdrawl stating that the US should not be caught up in a civil war amongst people that do not want peace. He insisted that a democracy will never work because they don't want it to, and thus our mission is hopeless.
Now, I understand how I feel about this, finally.
It's not as simple as either side would wish you to believe. Iraq is both a haven for terrorists trying to damage America in anyway possible, and it is in the midst of a civil war. The solution is not staying the course, nor is withdrawl. But, then, what is the answer?
I believe we should withdraw from Iraq (except for a few forces that would be left to train more Iraqi military and police, and keeps some locations secure). Those troops should then be stationed in Afghanistan (where we are ALSO having a "conflict"). By refocusing attention to Afghanistan, the home of Alquada and other terrorists, it will force them to return to fight for their homeland, leaving Iraq free to sort out it's own civil war (which may never happen).
It may not be perfect, but it's a different option rather than pull out or stay the course.
The other thing that struck me during Mr. Bush's speech was his complete lack of humility. He knows he's the top dog, and no one can take him down. He said that he would listen to the opinions of congress, but flat out said it didn't matter, because he was the Commander-In-Chief, and he would do what he wanted. I believe he's done more harm to this country than good, and I don't know if the next President is going to be able to fix that or not, Democrat, or Republican.
O, Mr. President, why don't you listen to your own people? You are not a king on your royal throne. You are servant to your people. We are not your servants, rather, you are our's. You say this is your war, well, it is our's too. Don't be so selfish as to think you are the only one that loses sleep over this at night, if you do at all. You were right, this war is about ideologies, but it's as much about you forcing American ideology on the country of Iraq, as it is about AlQueda trying to prove their ideologies by hurting us. You are playing a dangerous game, and your time will come to an end.
As Barbara Kingsolver wrote, "Where in the Bill of Rights is it written that the entitlement to bear arms-and use them-trumps any aspiration to peaceful solutions? I search my soul and find I cannot rejoice over killing, but that does not make me any less a citizen. When I look at the flag, why must I see it backlit with the rockets' red glare?"
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don't question bruce dickenson
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m&ms487
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2007 4 July :: 12.47am
It hurts me when my friends are hurting. I understand. I do. I'm here, but that's all I can do, really.
It's raining outside for the first time in a long time. When I was driving home from work tonight, there were flashes all around me. At first I thought it was fireworks, but then straight ahead, I caught a glimpse of a spectacular lightening bolt. It was amazing.
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don't question bruce dickenson
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m&ms487
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2007 30 June :: 2.50pm
I can't help but laugh...
If you'd like the WHOLE story, go to Gillette's post about Jesus Camp. Get in on the debate if you'd like. For now, an excerpt that is, well, awesome.
"i'm happy how i am. living my life day to day trying to be the best person i can be and let me tell you when i die i will go to wherever i wish to. if it is my own paradise then so be it. perhaps i'll go to disney world. i don't fucking know. i'm not dead yet.
btw how do you know all these things are real. has a dead person come to your hosue and knocked on the door and said i died and went to heaven i also went on a fieldtrip to hell. no i don't fucking think so. it's only what people tell you. read a history book or ask a fucking history fucking teacher.
the bible was written by men. men lie. they are all liars. but aren't we all? we all must repent. if we want to live eternal life in the joys of jesus with golden roads and lollipops."
-Jessie Gillette
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don't question bruce dickenson
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