:: 2005 14 June :: 9.17 pm

(Stolen from somebody) What can I say?, I'm mexican.

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3. When and how did we meet?

4. What do you think of me?

5. What's the fondest memory you have of me?

6.How long do you think we will be friends?

7. Do you love me?

8. Do you have a crush on me?

9. Would you kiss me?

10. Would you hug me?

11. Phyisically, what stands out?

12. Emotinally, what stands out?

13. Do you wish I was cooler?

14. On a scale from 1- 10, how hot am I?

15. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it

16. Am I loveable?

17. How long have you known me?

18. Describe me in one word.

19. What was your first impression?

20. Do you still think that way about me now?

21. What do you think my weakness is?

22. Do you think I"ll get married?

23. What makes me happy?

24. What makes me sad?

25. What reminds you of me?

26. If you could give me anything what would it be?

27. How well do you know me?

28. When's the last time you saw me?

29. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?

30. Do you think I could kill someone?

31. Do you miss me?

32. Do you think I miss you?

33. Are you going to put this on your blog and see what I say about you?

Some of these sound a little wimpy. Think of all man when you fill this out. jk.

"Scream my lungs out to try and get to you!"

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:: 2005 14 June :: 12.41 pm

I see my friend really do worry about me. Calling me bitch and all...

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:: 2005 14 June :: 8.45 am

Oh fuck it all to hell. I wish I was still in school instead of living here. Sorry Zuzu about not coming to first period. My mom said it wasn't appropriate for me to go to school, or even allowed. I wonder if she realizes she let me go yesterday... She asked if I had anything better to do than visit school and I said no, so she is making me clean my room. I fucking hate this place.

"It's not appropriate"

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:: 2005 11 June :: 4.23 am

I'm all grown up now. I have finished with highschool. The senior all nighter was fun, but I didn't win what I wanted. I didn't get the iPod nor the digital camera, even though I put a shitload of raffle tickets the bin. I guess my postulates aren't as strong as I thought. I thought I was deserving of those prizes... Maybe I'll save up my money and treat myself to one of them. I already miss Amelia...

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:: 2005 9 June :: 6.12 pm

I am glad I have someone to talk out all of my problems with. It is much better than being mad. The thing that I AM getting sick of though is how people seem to have problems with her and I being together. I thought every girl wanted faithfulness, companionship, honesty, love, friendship... The world doesn't seem to be ok with these qualities. It is getting harder and harder to be nice to everybody. There are so many people I want to yell at but haven't because I don't want it to go out of control and completely destroy them. So, as a side note to those people, stop giving me so much unneccesary crap to deal with and everything will be fine.

"I've got some things I would like to set in pen"

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:: 2005 6 June :: 9.36 pm

Today was my last full day of highschool. I can't believe it's all over. I feel like asking, "that's it?" I'm going to miss everything here. I thanked my teachers today for doing their job. I really do respect them.

I hate not being as powerful as I could be. There are those out there who are so much able than me. I just want to be able to have every ability I could dream of at my fingertips. I figure if you could train your heart out on one skill a day, and then rest the next day, then your ability list would go through the roof, right? I wish I had time to do that.

Amelia and I talked today. She isn't too happy with her results yet. I hate constructive criticism. She works really, really hard, and she isn't getting where she wants to be fast enough. I wish I could give her a hyperactive thyriod gland like mine. She deserves it.

I've been wondering. What is "deserve"? The dictionary says to have a right to, or be worthy of. Does this mean that you have to have enough worth as a person in order to be worthy enough to be taken by another? It's all too confusing. I don't believe that we "deserve" eachother. We just have eachother and that is the way it is.

I guess I have to go out on my own soon and face the world alone. I'm going to the middle of nowhere in "to hell and gone". How will I learn to become and adult out there? All I really know is that I don't want to go. Anytime I think about it I want to cry. I don't understand school. Congratulations! You passed highschool! Let's go to an even bigger, more expensive, and harder place, while ripping everything you've come to know and love from your fingertips. I am really close to crying now, just thinking about that which I have come to know and love.

What do I do? I'm so confused. I want an alternate universe.

"Why do you like my butt?"

3 Whats | up

:: 2005 3 June :: 7.39 pm

What did you do today?

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:: 2005 3 June :: 4.54 pm

28 inches on the high jump. Kicking of volleyballs. "20" bonus points. Last day of Spanish. Pizza. Test and review. Homework and turn in books. Stock market project. Drive around. Lonelyness. Boredom. Sad. Maybe things will be a little more exciting tomorrow...

"Maybe Jesus isn't The Jesus"

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:: 2005 31 May :: 7.08 pm

She likes me for me. I trust her with all of her heart. I feel safe about her. She makes me laugh like no other. It is kind of hard to make me truly laugh these days, but she can all of the time. We also started working out again.(well she did anyways) She looked hot today. I'm so warm, not because I'm sick, but rather my heart is bursting with warmth.

"Oooooh! Look at the little ducky-ducks! The're so cute!"

1 What | up

:: 2005 30 May :: 8.58 am

I wonder what kind of day it will be...
I think it will be pretty good because it is sunny. I found a new addiction game, it is called Mah Jongg. I slept pretty well last night. I went to bed late and woke up to the sun around 6:30 without being tired. I believe everyday should be like this. Good morning to you all!

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:: 2005 29 May :: 10.40 am

I hate mandatory hang out days. Why do people want to hang out with me so much? Grrrr.

3 Whats | up

:: 2005 28 May :: 8.16 pm

Well, I guess today evened out. She got a really pretty skirt and shirt. Her mom has been so mean to her lately. She didn't even like the outfit. Her husband agreed with her because she didn't like it. I'm sick of people treating my princess like crap. I would do something, but I found out that they already hate me. It is getting harder and harder to keep things in order. I haven't given up yet, only because she is trying her hardest. I admire that and that is why I try to help in every way. When you see the one you love cry their heart out in your arms, you feel like giving up because it couldn't get much worse after that. Fuck the world.

We also played the butt game and got two honks, one kissyo-poo face, and a "rock-on" signal. Her outfit(costume) is fabulous and she looks really pretty. I don't know what love is or feels like, but I would rather stick with what we have going on between us for the rest of our lives than taking the chance of finding out what it really is. I'm sick of this entire fucking universe destroying itself. I want to help those who need it. My only problem is all of the other fuckers in my way all the time making more problems. I swear above all else I want to blow the shit out of this hell-hole due to all the people that make living unbearable. They are lucky that I have morality and self control, otherwise it would be over for them.

"Thank you for gracing me with your angelic presence"

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:: 2005 27 May :: 9.20 pm

I'm so lucky to have found the one that I love. She is the entire world to me. She pushes me to be better and I do the same back. We both are becoming better people and young adults together. We never have big fights and always talk out our small problems. If anybody has a problem with us being together, I ask to you why? Nothing could be better than getting through life with the one you love. We all want to be happier. Let's forward the process by just being happy. You only have to make the decision to be happy, and that will happen. If you are sad, find something to laugh about and soon you will be laughing. BE HAPPY.

"I can't wait until we get married. It will be great"

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:: 2005 27 May :: 12.27 pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: talking people

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:: 2005 26 May :: 9.54 pm
:: Mood: happy

I love you

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