godessalthena
|
::
2011 27 December :: 1.53am
EEEE!!!
Sus come home tomorrow!! I'm so excited! I'm making sure the house is nice and clean, that he has everything he needs to relax, and his puppy is well rested for playing! And if all goes well I'll get the 2nd half of Tuesday off to spend with him! And then the whole weekend! And then Winter Wobbleland! And and and! I'm just so happy he'll be home.
I had a great day with my family, opened gifts, ate delicious food, watched tv and out together part of a puzzle! Then it snowed lots on the way home! And bjorne was such a pill at my parents house, but SO well behaved on the car ride home!
Now I'm just waiting on the dryer to finish the blankets so I can curl up in bed and rest my wary back.
Ahh!! SO EXCITED!!
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 24 December :: 4.06pm
In a horrid mood today. I don't want to be at work. I don't want to be home alone. It was snowing, but turned to rain so the drive home? Icy as fuck.
I'm just ready for it to be the 27th. Or the 31st, but I am so over this holiday season. I'm lucky so far that no one wished me a "merry christmas" yet. Blah.
On the bright side I finished my presents for my family. Hopefully they like them.. Sometimes I feel like what I make is just like.. "meh" to them, even tho I put a lot of time into it.
Sigh
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 22 December :: 6.29pm
I'm so angry. And lonely. I just want it to be next week.
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 21 December :: 1.52pm
It's pretty lonely here :/
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 8 December :: 3.09pm
Bjorne seems to be all better, vet said he looks fine, they are doing some tests to check for parasites. He's vaccinated! And yeah.. Crisis averted! :)
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 6 December :: 2.14pm
Bjorne is sick :( I haven't seen him eat or drink for at least a day and he threw up bile 3 times this morning.. Going to the vet on Thursday. I hope he's ok. :(
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 3 December :: 2.34pm
Girls don't like boys
I haven't spent any real intimate time with a woman since me and Liv broke up. I miss being around girls a whole bunch and I find it next to impossible to meet anyone or find someone who I make a connection with. I don't know what it is, but it's hella annoying.
I'm trying to find a cocktiel pattern to make for my sister. I found a really good one, but I'm not sure if I want to buy it. It's not very expensive, I'm just trying to figure out if I'll use it again. Tho, it could be easily adapted to turn into other birds.. So maybe I will!
Bjorne is so cute :3 he just makes my life with his cuteness! I love him to pieces <3
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 28 November :: 2.53am
I've started crocheting amigurumi things. It makes me so happy and I feel so accomplished when I finish a piece and it doesnt look like amature night :)
Samie is a new girl at work. She's so happy and bubbly and positive. It helps me feel better about the stupid crap. I know we aren't technically friends, and probably never will be, but it's nice to have an upbeat influence in my life.
Really not looking forward to Xmas. Sus will be gone and all my friends live too far away.. It'll mostly be me n Bjorne and that makes me sad. I'll miss Sus :(
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 19 November :: 4.52pm
Really? Sometimes all I can do is shake my head.
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 15 November :: 2.26am
After a horrible start, my day turned out pretty good! I cried on the way to work and by the time I left I was laughing and feeling optimistic.
I'm going to work on doing things for me. Like doing my hair and make up. The little things that make me feel better when I take the time to do it. :)
I can do this
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 13 November :: 11.04pm
Going home early from work because I just can't sit here anymore.
The more I look at other people the more inadequate I feel.
I'm ashamed to be me. I'm so boring. Uneventful. Plain.
Feel like icky plain yogurt with no sprinkles or anything.
I feel ugly and obese.
TSUMARANAI.
I'm just so disappointed and disillusioned.
I'm tired and depressed.
All these people at work. They love purses, make up, babies, getting their nails done, etc. And I'm such an outcast. I feel so pressured to be something I'm not. It's a mindfuck. Everyone thinks I should have a baby. Or get a new boyfriend who will want a baby. Or get married. And I don't want any of those things.
I'm so exhausted by all of it.
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 6 November :: 1.17pm
I'm so fucking sick of all these fake assholes that call themselves my "friends"
All they do is ignore me when I need help and the nit pick everything just to piss me off.
I'm tired of always being there for people who can't even give me the time of day.
I'm sick of missing people who don't miss me.
I'm done with trying to make new "friends".
I really just wish I could destroy shit right now. Just tear something to pieces and watch it burn.
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 5 November :: 2.25pm
I have lost 6 pounds. I haven't been consciously trying to lose weight. Though I really need to get the weight off.
I'm so happy and proud of myself! It's a small step, but it's a step none the less. And the fact that I haven't been trying makes it more sustainable than hardcore dieting. :)
Things are really looking up! Sus starts his testing, I have a nice car for winter, I have a wonderful puppy, I've greatly reduced my drinking.. :)
Go me!
1 touched my hand |
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 2 November :: 6.50pm
I want to visit Alaska :(
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 29 October :: 1.14pm
Low low low
Im feeling very discouraged today. Life isn't what I thought it would be. Things never go as planned.
I went to a house party last night. I only knew the host and her boyfriend. Needless to say I was a complete outcast. It reminded me a lot of work. I go, smile and nod at the people talking and then go home to watch star trek. I enjoyed being around others, but I never have anything interesting to say, no stories to tell.. I felt like a total loser. Also, being the biggest girl there and the only one without a costume also put me in my own circle. Basically I was the fat kid at school that everyone ignores because being fat somehow equates to being mentally handicapped or diseased.
I just want to feel like part of the group. I used to take a lot of pride in being different.. But that's when I had friends who were different too. Now I just have acquaintances who put up with me because they get something they want out of me being around - showing off their "bisexuality" to attract men, ego boosts, free booze or other party favors. I'm tired of just being needed for what I can get other people, not for being an enjoyable part of someone's existence.
Also I found out that thanks to hurricane Irene we probably won't be getting bonuses this year. And prolly minor raises if any. Yay.
I have no idea what I have to look forward to anymore.
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 25 October :: 8.50pm
Starting to look at rental houses :3 oh the excitement :3
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
godessalthena
|
::
2011 21 October :: 3.39pm
Movie mania this weekend :) 50/50 with Peter and The Thing with Sus! Sooo excited :3
I need a haircut.. What I really want is to get extensions! I am so impatient in growing it out.. My hair grows SO slowly..
Finished making my skittles vodka last night. They aren't as delicious as I had hoped for but they were a fun adventure! I think I'll be experimenting with infusions in the future :3
I absolutely LOVE my new car! It's a V6 so I can actually get up hills and catch up to highway speeds in a reasonable amount of time. It's silly, but I feel like I'm driving a charger or something. Haha
Things are looking very up right now. Sus tells me I have nothing to complain about anymore haha. I've got my puppy, an awesome car, my bills paid.. Things are actually not so bad :)
Now to just get Sus into school and we'll be golden!
and tha sun got brighter then
|
|
