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dumbblonde1137
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2004 25 May :: 3.54pm
:: Mood: dorky
:: Music: sumone knocking on the door...
knock! knock! knock!
haha yet another gay quiz...
You are fucking hardcore, you have the ability to
avoid mainstream and brainwashing cults like
MTV and FOX, you are one of the few, the loud,
the proud, the punk, go you, or you cheated
Do you know punk?
brought to you by Quizilla
--HAHA camila it said "HARDCORE" LOL!!
<3-janelle
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2004 25 May :: 12.11pm
:: Mood: eating
:: Music: ludacris - game got switched
asexualityrocks (11:50:12 AM): i love manny
asexualityrocks (11:50:16 AM): like all of my friends are in love with him asexualityrocks (11:50:17 AM): and i love it
susanis a winner (11:50:33 AM): haha we always have like the same conversation .
asexualityrocks (11:50:45 AM): i know!!!
susanis a winner (11:50:56 AM): it's like "Hey what's up ?" "rolling a blunt" "smoke it with me !" "come up here , you guys can stay in my room " "alright , we'll come up tomorrow"
asexualityrocks (11:51:02 AM): its like: susan: So manny pot pot pot ?? and manny: SUSAN! Pot pot pot pot !!
asexualityrocks (11:51:27 AM): susan: pot is so amazing!! manny: What are you saying? i'm too high to understand you
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dumbblonde1137
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2004 24 May :: 8.40pm
:: Mood: tired/annoyed
:: Music: Cold Hard Bitch by: Jet
boys = penis brains!!
arggh! i hate spring time when everyones in love <3 and like it seems that everyone has a bf/gf. god i hate it. i've had bad luck with guys lately --well every since that thing--but thats not important. but it seems everytime i give into their stupid crap and get hurt, they are jus "messing around" or are already going out with sum stupid slut!!! cough lucy cough. LOL but still ahhhh! i wanna boyfriend rilly bad! i havent had one since dan, and thats pathetic lol! ahhh doesnt anyone love me??? :/
<33-jan-
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2004 24 May :: 1.49am
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: shuffle on my winamp playlist
Instructions :
Step One : Put all your MP3s on your winamp playlist , press shuffle , and record the first few lines of the first twenty songs .
Step Two : Find better things to do so you can stop doing fucking stupid online journal shit .
1. 586 - So , so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell ? Blue skies from pain ?
2. 629 - I saw an old man on a street . He was in a dumpster looking for something to eat .
3. 249 - Good morning , sunshine . Awake when the sun hits the sky .
4. 266 - All alone in a broken world . Finding a new place to start .
5. 529 - Para bailar la bamba , para bailar la bamba se necesito un poca de gracia .
6 . 301 - It's yet to be determined , but the air is thick , and my hope is feeling warm .
7. 656 - There is a steel train coming through . I would take it if i could .
8. 407 - So what's the point ? To stay away ? It hurts the same .
9. 146 - Oh , as I sit under this weeping willow tree , pain and sorrow is all I feel .
10. 420 ! - When you have no light to guide you , and no one to walk beside you , I will come to you , ohh , come to you .
11. 583 - Oh I'm so glad , you know , they've all just gone home , cause finally we're here alone at last .
12. 237 - It began in Africa-ca-ca-ca-ca . It began in Africa-ca-ca-ca-ca.
13. 704 - Con unas ancias locas quiero verte hoy . Espero eso momento en que escuche tu voz .
14. 735 - Niggas ain't fuckin with this , originalis . Beats ain't bangin like this .
15. 531 - Turn it inside out so I can see the part of you that's drifting over me .
16. 865 - Do you believe ?
17. 218 - Saw it on the television . Heard it on the radio . This , in truth , is not yet the end .
18. 128 - And here's to you , Mrs. Robinson . Jesus loves you more than you will know . Oh-oh-oh .
19. 459 - Let me be patient . Let me be kind . Make me unselfish , without being blind .
20. 12 - Chelsea , baby , let's run away to some third world country .
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2004 23 May :: 10.01pm
:: Mood: decisive
:: Music: hoobastank - the reason
in the back of my mind , i'm thinking infiniti SUVs and nordstrom shopping sprees , which is , essentially , what i know of him , unless you count the two point five second witty replies that first made him not so crazy and made it okay to give him my phone number . but sprawled on the couch at eleven thirteen in the morning , waiting for the food to get here so i can say my goodbyes and my thank yous and my "see you next friday"s , i'm hoping he's working on this sunny saturday morning so i have an excuse not to see him . i'm thinking , your hair is everywhere , we are sweaty because the air conditioning is one of the many things currently under repair , you have a five o'clock shadow , or is it eleven o'clock ? , and that look you're giving me , that i catch you giving me from the corner of my eye when the beat is crazy and i'm on the dance floor giving it my all , is enough to make me want to stay here forever . i'm working it all out , figuring i can wear the same outfit if i just wash it enough , and i can get a new job and go shopping eventually . i'll stay in this house , even though there's no toilet paper , and i'll just use her towel when i shower . every little thing will be alright . what will i be missing ? nice dinners and backseat dvds , and delicious desserts in spacious apartments and maybe a house . and then somebody comes downstairs and laughs at you but you smile and admit "esta chica me tiene reventado" and there's not even so much as a question anymore . just hand it to me so i can add to the dark circles and have enough energy to grab my phone and tell my mother to forward my mail . i keep wanting to translate this song and send it to you but i keep putting it off , so here is the first part ... maybe eventually i'll get up the courage to follow through .
No soy persona perfecta
Hay muchas cosas que quisieria no hacer
Pero sígo aprendiendo
Nunca quise hacerte esas cosas
Entonces te tengo que decír antes de írme que solo quiero que sepas
Encontre una razón para mi
Para cambiar la persona que era
Una razón para empezar de nuevo
Y tu eres la razón
Perdoname por herírte
Es algo que siempre voy a tener en la mente
Y todo el dolor que te e traído
Quisiera poder llevarmelo todo
Y ser la que te limpia todas tus lagrimas
Por eso necesito que
Encontre una razón para mi
Para cambiar la persona que era
Una razón para empezar de nuevo
Y tu eres la razón
Y tu eres la razón
No soy persona perfecta
Nunca quise hacerte todo eso
Entonces te tengo que decir antes de irme
Que solo quiero que sepas
Encontre una razón para mi
Para cambiar la persona que era
Una razón para empezar de nuevo
Y tu eres la razón
Encontre una razón para demonstrar
Una parte de mi que no conosiste
Una razón por todo lo que ago
Y tu eres la razón
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dumbblonde1137
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2004 21 May :: 10.41pm
:: Mood: upset
:: Music: My Paper <3 by: All American Rejects
Simple things that make you run away...
god today was sooo HORRIBLE it wasnt funny. geometry was boring. i got an A on my spanish test (only good part of the day) english=gay jus like levin. drivers ed=boring and pointless. bio=a complete WASTE of time. we played jeopardy and the class wuldnt shtu the fuck up! and the questions are the exact ones from the exam!! ahh i didnt learn a friggin thing. so i went to p.e. upset about that when i asked mrs. belton if ther was anyway to get my stuff outta my locker. she said that everything was G O N E. that means i lost 2 skirts (jean one and pink/black/white striped one) 2 shirts (black and a blue one) 2 sweaters (white one with diamond J on it, and a black one) and my brothers sweatshirt. i was soooo upset i started crying. if i tell my mom im gunna get soooo grounded!!
then i let nikki borrow my 120 history ids yesterday and she put them in her yearbook, but nicole had it. so we went to get it from her and she had given it to caitlen. which means she didnt have my work. i immediately start crying again cuz that was the only way i wuld get an A in the class if i turned those in. then we had to run our asses to class cuz the warning bell rang. then i met mrs. skeleton at the door and she saw me crying and was like "Oh honey, whats wrong?" and i told her that i left my hw in my yearbook and a friend had it blah blah and she was sooo nice about it. she told me to turn it in on monday and not to get so worked up over things like that. then she left me go to the bathroom and calm down. wow she was soo nice. mayb the fact that i was friggin BAWLING my eyes out helped. lol i didnt do it on purpose tho. :/
then jack came over after skool and we went to target to buy janis a bday present for her party tomorrow. we are gunna be chinese again. yay!
god im sooo friggin bored rite now! i was gunna go to sleep cuz im rilly tired but i jus cant sleep and i dunno why. now i wish i wulda went to either camilas house or done sumthin with andrew. lol ahhh boredem suxks!!!!!!!!!!!!
alrite. im gunna go find sumthin to entertain me. buh-bye.
<33-jan-
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dumbblonde1137
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2004 18 May :: 8.48pm
:: Mood: happi!!!
:: Music: n0n3~~
ta-daaa!!!
Who got an 100% on their geometry test!?? woohu FUCK YEAH!!
-that is sooo going on the refrigerator!! :P
<33-jan
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dumbblonde1137
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2004 17 May :: 6.58pm
:: Mood: hot
:: Music: sprinklers...sprinkling?
sprinkle! sprinkle!
today was ehhh. spanish we did work. drivers-2 movies and a test. lunch-signed mara and janis' yearbooks. bio- pig smelled like shit. the flesh was starting to rot. eww rite? yeah i thought so. we studied. then valerie dumped a bucket-o-pigs on the floor and rotting pigs and pig juice went everywhere. it was funni/gross. lol. p.e.-played bball with lucy, andrew, toga, twaddles(lol), joey, angelica etc. it was fun. oh yeah i have AIDS. lucy gave them to me. LoL then went outside. it was gay and hot. then went home and had t go bak to jacks house and get the flashcards for levins vocab test 2morrow. then ran like a mile to catch up to camila and alina. now im here about to do my hw. oooh yeah heres another RaNdOm quiz. alrite in out. peace.
You are a banana! Good job, captain obvious.
which rejected character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
<333-jan
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dumbblonde1137
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2004 17 May :: 6.40pm
:: Mood: drained
:: Music: parents talking...
blah blah blah blah BLAH!!
i changed my journal format. comment and tell me if u like it!!!
<3-jan
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2004 17 May :: 2.45am
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: pendulum ft. lisa lind - back to you
but i KNOW the secret . it is not , however , two sandwiches at 11:30 and a bowl of cereal accompanied by a salad at 11:05 . it is quite the opposite , actually , but the secret part two is contradicting , so where do i stand ? stuggling to fulfill part two while part one lies abandoned , but not forgotten . ignored , but creeping around in the back of my mind , skulking , annoying , challenging me to somehow rid myself of its presence because it knows that i cannot . it knows that i am past that stage where parts one and two are so happily intertwined , so easy to learn . instead , i am older and wiser , but somewhere along the way , i forgot how to make it all work together . or maybe i just gave up on trying to .
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2004 17 May :: 2.39am
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: pendulum ft. lisa lind - back to you
if it ever even mattered at all , i should have known that it wouldn't in the future . the signs were there but i ignored them . the signs still are but i continue to and it just makes the hard things even harder . and i don't know how long it will be before i rip myself away , or if i ever will fully , but i hope it's soon so that i can tell myself that the future is brighter , starting right now . step one . try and get an earlier start to bed so there is less thinking going on . step two . pray that it doesn't take over my dreams , because i was never one to handle nightmares . there is so much i want to tell you but i know that i'll always just say it's nothing . i don't know why you don't know that i lie to you . i wish you could hear just one of the practiced conversations alone in my car , where i tell you what you've always done to me and what i've watched you do to me with that same smile i watch everything with . with that smile that doesn't look anything like the one that he sees , but he doesn't matter anymore , because i pushed him away when i realized he wasn't like the rest of them . when i realized that i would never sit and write an entry about why i would be better off without him in regards to my happiness , which i've always thought was my own personal goal , above anything else . it's the tears that decipher what you really mean when you say what you do , and what runs through your head when your eyes are shut tightly is always what you should pursue . if you don't start somewhere , you'll never get anywhere , so here goes step one .
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dumbblonde1137
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2004 16 May :: 2.08pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: stupid PS2 in the other room..
vroom vroom!!
yeah so today me and mommy went to the mall and i got my 3rd hole and 2nd cartilage pierced. it looks rilly good except for the fact that both my cartilage piercings are kinda close to each other. oh well. i like it.
my parents are having company over soon. so basically im not allowed to touch anything cuz i mite get it dirty. lol. im rilly bored. camila and alina arent home and theres nuttin to do. *sigh* well im gunna go. byebye
<33-jan-
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2004 15 May :: 9.23pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: Ocean Avenue by: Yellowcard
if i could find you now, things would get better...
ehhh...i jus got bak from super walmsrt with my dad. i drove. the drive there was pleasant and jeez there were like a bajillion people there!!! does nobodie have a life (like me) and goes to walmart on a saturday nite?!? it took us like an hour-hour and 15 minutes to shop. then it was dark and i had to drive home---spo0o0oky! lol thennnnn we had to stop at the gas station and then finally on home. god when my dad is looking for the shortest check out line he takes NO PRISONERS!! lol i seriously think if a lady walked out in front of him he wulda hit her with the cart cuz he was going so damn fast!!! lol it was funni. now im tired and im gunna go to bed early 2nite cuz me and mommy are "bonding" 2morrow morning!!! :D later lovelies! xoxo
--i wanna get my ears pierced a 3rd time but im not sure where i want it. like middle, bottom etc. i need help! wut do ya'll think?? *talks to self--dude jan, why do u always ask ppl to tell u what they think when u kno that NO ONE EVER EVER COMMENTS IN UR GODFORSAKEN JOURNAL!! god ur dumb jan!* lol im gay!
<33-jan
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2004 15 May :: 2.22am
:: Mood: accomplished
:: Music: Penny & Me by: Hanson
turn the radio up, push the pedal to the ground...
wow. im soooo proud of myself. besides doing ym weekly chores, I CLEANED MY ROOM!!! it was a disaster area--yeah sum of u kno how bad it was--lol. so yeah i cleaned and rearranged it.
--my mom said if i cleaned my room that 2morrow we will have another one of our "mother-daughter bondings" shes gunna take me to the mall to get my third hole pierced and myab my second cartilage piercing, not sure yet tho. then we are going grocery shopping. hehe :D i <33 my mommy this [........................................] much! hehehe.
--anywho now im bored. i have no idea where anyone is. *sigh* oh well im gunna go try and find a new background for this journal.. later lovelies~!
<33-jan
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dumbblonde1137
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2004 15 May :: 11.08am
:: Mood: lazy
:: Music: birds chirping..
chirp! chirp! chirp!
i wanna do sumthin fun tonite! sumone call me and we'll make plans!! ;)
<33-jan
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