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toki

:: 2004 7 March :: 9.52pm

Dreams
So I had two dreams last night. I'll write them here. Cuz I don't want to do my term paper. lol.

First dream: i was in chem and the announcements said that TA pics were in and could be picked up that day. I was all Noooo...not pictures..then my cell phone rang and shenk glared at me, so I went ot the hall and answered it. And melanie was out there on the phone too, and it turned out she was the one calling me....so she started to talk all nice...but still over the phone even though we were right next to each other. Then I said something about Hul and turnabout and she was all like "I wanted to ask him ya know." I apoligized..thens he was all "Yeah, he's 18, has a car, he's prfect, and you asked him. you don't deserve to have your picture with him." and im like "well, i asked him before you. Yuo hate dances anyways...blah..blah.." then hul came up and handed me a packet of pictures and melanie tried to grab them but i took them first. And i was about to look at them, but she started to burn them with her eyes(???) then jackie walked up and i started trying to tell her what melanie was saying w/o melanie hearing it, so i covered the thing on the phone up, but she could still hear..considering she was right there. then jackie got mad at melanie and melanie stomped off and then jackie took melanie's phone and we talked...yep...thats all I remember.

The other dream...to understand it, I spent about 30 mins one night seperating all my pennies from the rest of my coins...ok..so jackie was in my room and her phone kept ringing and she kept talking to people while throwing stuff all over my room, so i was walking behind her picking stuff up...then i turned around to look at jackie and she was standing next to my coin bowl and the coins were all mixed up and i was freaking out..to myself..and i was gonna say something but then she said "oh god, he drank soda" then she fainted and i wanted to fix my coins, but i had to help her. and i was worried my dad would come down and find out i had a friend over and that my room wasnt clean...yeep....

Ok..back to the term paper.

3 Pirates | X marks the spot


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 4 March :: 9.48pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: tru calling (i really like this show)

so i was searching for a picture of an eye...and i found these....

this site looks awesome...its a game thats going to come out...and the images are amazing...i love the dark twist on alice in wonderland...
Little Beast

Blue Eye

3 Pirates | X marks the spot


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 4 March :: 6.54pm
:: Mood: content
:: Music: "it's a beautiful morning..."

joseph pictures...
so we did "joseph and the amazing technicolour dreamcoat" and if youd like to see the pictures. the sheep trix and jill and jen and jackie and i made...the scarab (the big green thing that looks like a guitar...its supposed ot be a modern symbol...for elvis...if you know the show you understand) was made by sarah, blair, stephanie, shay and i did a little bit. The cacti were sarahs, stephanies and lauras...the palm trees were also sarahs...with random people...but jen did most of the corn...and the gold coins. thanks to chris for the lights and spencer for the sound (but you cant really see it) and to sandy and goli for being in the picutres lol...i odnt know what else to thank you guys for...lol thanks for your wonderful voices...!

adios...thas all folks! ::dun dun dun dunn duuuun::

1 Pirate | X marks the spot


mudpiegrl

:: 2004 3 March :: 11.08pm
:: Music: Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds

^hm...guess what thats about...
yea so guess what song jen and i listened to today...lol....its in my head...

sorry i never updated about theatre fest....or the concert...didnt even talk about joseph......or the act....probably cuz i havent been on....id love to complain...cept it doesnt bother me that much until someone goes...you have to do this by this date...specially if its before march twenty fourth, seeing as i have six projects due by then, two of which are due tmro. woo...two down! this kid is such a moron. im working with him in spanish...first he doesnt let me help, then he cant even spell sun (sol) and for god sakes wont fucking believe me when i tell him the hurricane is one so the verb will be singular...but oh well...i have my prose analysis presentation tmro eighth period. i shall die. i hate presentations...at least in spanish i have a partner....

today jen and i went to mcdonalds and shopping with charlie...hes funny as hell...i love him to death...not like that...but anyone who thinks charlies an ass needs a life cuz i think hes awesome. he can get obnoxious but i think anyone can, and you learn not to take him seriously...

you know it really makes me wonder...i dont care who reads this...but when lisa decided "i think ill throw a fit now to see how many people side with me about something so incredibly stupid that happened three months ago" she said ", i really dont even care about whatever happens with me/jorie. i would have cared a few months ago, but now, im used to not liking her, so it really doesn't make a difference. its just amazing how long it took her." and i wondered...how the fuck can anyone tell that youre mad at them if you walk around, saying hi in the fakest high pitched voice as if youre sad as fuck but acting happy...but noticably? she was quick to point out how she hated when i corrected peoples english, how jill and kyle didnt like my comments on looking younger in the dress for HC and for saying he needs a haircut, and how im "dilusional". She also mentioned how i never listen to anyone and basically dont deserve to have any friends...and then suddenly shes all nice to me as if the "war" either never happened or was solved. the cause of it all was because i wrote her a very nice email, possibly too nice, asking her to please clean up her mess when she comes over, because i dont like doing it, nor do my parents. and so, suddenly she was mad at shaina cuz "shaina sided with jorie instead of me" "she may have gotten shaina". oh lord....honestly...i didnt even care...the girl called me a bitch, so i kindly told her i could read...ooh lets start a one-sided arguement and convince ourselves we're losing...woo...but recently...this is what bothers me.
i dont mind that people are her friends (cuz everyone needs friends)...but i find it slightly pathetic to say "this is a shout out to all yall out there who think you're my friend. just wondering how many of you there are. so leave me a comment, k?" feeling abandoned is okie...asking for support is another...but three entries spent on "guys support me i feel friendless today!"...arrg...because you know shes just searching for pity...and whats worse is that people complain and complain about her...about how she does this...and thne the moment comes when she does it...and "oh im sorry lisa ::hug::"...are we no longer aware of the word hypocritical...?

if any of you disagree thats your perogitive...thats my thoughts, this is my journal...if you have any thoughts...put them...but i dont need to recieve hate mail because i wont respond...and its very pointless.

in other thoughts...im tired as fuck. i want to sleep...two presentations tmro...did i already say that? oh yes...thats right. my back really hurts. auditions are next monday. its wednesday. ::sigh::

i want to audition but not make it. i want to do crew but i want to know if the possibility is there. yea. i finally made callbacks for razzle and one acts so i know that they have started to like me...whether my acting or just cuz they feel bad. i should do all my papers this week and not have anything to worry about for the rest of the month. yea...right...okie i have to go finish my spanish outline so i can start memorizing...sweet dreams

2 Pirates | X marks the spot


Toki

:: 2004 3 March :: 10.29pm
:: Mood: morose
:: Music: breathe

:-( Shoes...
My mom made me buy new shoes. I hate it. I hate them. I'm not gonna stop wearing my other ones. I don't deal with change well. Actually, I can't deal with it at all. New shoes...nope. Not for Patrice. I'm not ready.

Then after she did that, she told me I looked like I was growing a beard.

Thanks mom.

Oh, but i got the golden compass....wooo! I'm happy.

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Toki

:: 2004 1 March :: 1.46pm
:: Mood: okay

Good morning all! So you know what? I hate teen horoscopes. Lol. They suck. Because general horoscopes are good, you can interpret them in any way you want. But those teen ones are always about your "bf" or "that class you've been worried about" and today it was nice and totally contradicts my other horoscope. O.o....hmmm..damn horoscopes.

Ok...So I want to write about the weekend. I just was feeling sick last night...so I decided to sleep. But now I'm awake and feel a tad better so here goes...The shows were fun. Yep. Kinda crazy at times. Stupid actors telling me their "right" baskets weren't there when it doesn't even matter...actors taking empty baskets...trying to steal their props without telling me O.o;;...lol..the cup always breaking. That was kinda funny though at times.

Friday night was our hanson party. Which was awesome. I kinda fell asleep 2 songs into the second concert...but shhh....I was tired. And we made awesome shirts. Wearing them Tuesday. I know....You're excited. So am I. Hehe.

Then photo call....and the saturday show....then the cast party. Which is the main point of writing this here. I have never been to worse place ever. I mean, I've heard about teen parties with music and lotsa craziness and energy...but wow. I hated it. The speeches took forever....people were laying on top of each other everywhere. I mean, I don't know. I just couldn't stand it. So after speeches Jackie left and I couldn't find jill...so i talked for christine a little bit. Woo...that was interesting. yeah, then I went back in and wandred around by myself untili found Wender and Jorie and Blair and we went outside. Which was the best part. Then Hul came out then sandya nd O.o;;;Mike....grrrr....but yeah. That was teh ebst part of the cast party. Then I went to Jill's house and we were idiots and stayed up way too late...which brings me to Sunday....at 12:30..

Yeah, call was at 12ish..and we woke up at 12:30. I know...we're stupid. And we couldn't get a ride there....so we called Hul, who was awesome and drove us to school. Yeah...then I learned camera stuff and that was kinda weird. I think I messed up alot. But that's ok. We filmed the pit, which was cool. And then strike....Jill and I finished in the first hour. We should have just left...but we can be idiots at times, so we stayed. It was long and not terrible..but stupid people make me mad. because..yeah...i can't really explain it here. I don't know. Then i went home and slept for 11 hours. Which felt good. But now my head hurts and I haev alot to do today...and alot of time..just no motivation...I think I'll bassoon first. i think I have to go to the library...I should find someone to go with. Cuz I hate going alone. It's catch up time...bllaaaaahhh....okie..byebye...

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Toki

:: 2004 1 March :: 12.37am
:: Mood: exanimate
:: Music: Michelle Branch

Bye Bye Joseph
the show is offically over now. I'm not really sad though. or happy. I've just kinda accepted it. This show has been so much fun though. Mainly just this week, with the shows and all. being backstage with Jackie and Jill and all the other running crew people. Lol. It's been awesome. Lotsa stuff happened this week and I'm kinda glad that everything's winding down, atleast one thing will be gone for a little bit. But no matter how happy I am whenever the shows end, I get sad in a day cuz I realize how much of a life I don't have when I have no crew. It's depressing. It's like...I have so much fun talking and being with certain people but as soon as the show's over I NEVER see them and don't really get a chance to talk to them. Plus crew has become the one thing I half think I can do well, and yeah....If i don't have that, I'll die. lol.

Solo and emsemble is this weekend. Bllaaaaaaaahhh. I hate my bassoon teacher for making me do it. I can mostly do my solo though. And the duet....eeehhhh, it's bad. We can work on it though. Yep. ::nods:: :-\ ahhh...Ok..not freaking out yet. Nope.

I don't know. I don't feel good. I'm sorry. No mas entrying for me today. Goodnight all...and good job with the play! :-)

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Toki

:: 2004 26 February :: 11.21pm
:: Mood: exhausted
:: Music: Joseph

Today's Horoscope
Taurus April 20 - May 20
You're feeling both practical and creative. Why not invite friends over for a craft night or offer to mastermind a musical or theatrical event? Your blend of talents is just right for the job.

Coincidence? I think not....

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Toki

:: 2004 21 February :: 9.28pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: A little help from my friends

my dream

My dream was weird last night. I'll write about it here. Okie? (Even though it's killing my hands to type.) Ok...here goes. before my hand dies. Ok..so I got mad at my parents so I tookmy mom's van (the old purple one) and drove downt his road with it. It was midday but no one was on the road but I kept thinking I hit things when I really didn't. Then I saw Jen and Hope(?) hitchhiking so I picked them up and they asked me to take them to crew. I was afraid I was gonna get arrested..cuz I didn't ahev a lisence or a permit or someone over 21...but I risked it anyways. So the 3 of us went into crew, and we ahd to go down this crazy ladder thing and it was all dark and such and when someone had a bigger part int he dream, the light would shine on them, but then it would be dark again. and then my keys and hope's keys and jens keys got thrown ina pile of foam and i tried to find mine but I kept pulling out everyone else's. So yeah, i finally found them and jen promised to come back home with me to drop off my car. But I turn around and shes talking to Jorie and Neil, and I'm all..jen come on! And she's like "no, i have to work, I can't" then she went dark. Then I asked hope and she said no..and she went dark. and then i asked jackie and she said she promised that she'd talk to someone and couldn't go btu i was flipping out cuz i was gonna get arrested. So yeah. Then finally jackie agreed to go and we had to climb up the ladder, but I didn't feel good and it was dark at the top and i couldn't see where it went. jackie started to climb and I went to follow, btu then I got scared and went down. So she came down a little and started yelling at me to go on, that it wasn't that bad. but I was scared, so I climbed the other side of the ladder and jackie kept going "ok, only two more steps, im almost there" but I was really far from the top, even though it was a short ladder. And she kept yelling at me to climb up but I wouldn't move because I didn't want to fall and die because I was ont eh wrong side of the ladder and jackie was on the other. So yeah. that was my dream. it means death. Or other things. It was weird, ok...movie time...night..

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Toki

:: 2004 17 February :: 11.45pm
:: Mood: frustrated
:: Music: Iris

Chemistry Sucks
So I'm not really insanely stressed about the play. I actually think we're good on time. :-) Yay! Thanks to people who are awesome and yell at me if I freak out. Well yeah, so chemistry. I had a webquest due today. Didn't do it. And so i go home to do it today and I lost ALL the sheets with EVERY SINGLE flippin website. Which isn't good so this is where my flipping out comes into play. I'm screwed. I've never not done a project before. And now it's gonna be two days late because I lost the damn sheet, I mean, yeah it's a C, but I just totally failed my hmwrk grade this midterm and tomorrow is midterm and let's just say I'm screwed....royally. What am I gonna do? I have no way of finding that webquest. Wait...it's at a website. Maybe I'll look for it? It'll take forever...but it's worth a shot. Okie...to that...i want to write about something...but maybe later...Many happy foam huggings,
Patrice

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Toki

:: 2004 13 February :: 12.53am
:: Mood: rushed
:: Music: Iris

Ok..I give up on homework. It's crap. I did two of the three and a half sections. So it's good. Ionyl got...13 questions left. And Kenny doesn't really look anyways. I'm just gonna read these articles and write a response. Doesn't seem too hard. Plus it's extra credit. Then it's to sleep..yay...then to school where I will proceed to study for my three tests of 2morrow...study for algebra and chem in the morning...chem and history after algebra....same in lit....then after chem more history. Then freedom. Wooo!!! My heads gonna kill tomorrow. Both a math and a chem test...that means inevitable headacheing. so I'll bring some drugs to take. it helps. ok..forget that. no extra credit right now. Gaaaahhhrr.. everything schoolwise is fallign apart. no fun at all. Today was fun though. Jammed my finger at street scenes...hhehe...yeah but my mom pulled it and it popped and it was all better. i hope. Then yeah, to crew..which i got yelled at alot...but I paid for that ticket long before I knew i was a crew head, so you can't blame me. ::nods:: well...yes...hmm..what else to say? ta is in two days. nuts, eh? ok..well i'm gonna sleep. i need it.

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toki

:: 2004 9 February :: 12.35pm

So I’m at school now. We have five minutes of history left. Blllaaaahhh…. I feel blah right now. But I’m not in a blah mood, which is a good thing. Yeah, So I didn’t do my chem. Or algebra homework. Or my lit. And I feel stupid cuz I thought I had done it all. I gots ice-skating with the Bauer next. Woo…more pinwheels?? He he. Yeah. My mom should buy pink thread for my dress today. If she doesn’t. Then grrr…I’ll eat her liver. Yeah, cuz TA is this week. Can you believe that? I don’t know. I’m nervous. That it won’t be fun or that I’ll have a crappy time or cause others to have a crappy time or blah blah…and that Hul doesn’t really want to go and I feel bad asking him and making him do something he doesn’t want to do. I don’t want him to have a crappy time either. And by going with me. That’s kind of inevitable. I feel bad for him. Having to go with me to a dance. I’d cry if I were he…Okie…time for gym…byebye!

1 Pirate | X marks the spot


Toki

:: 2004 8 February :: 12.30am
:: Mood: disappointed
:: Music: Disney

Boney Face!!
I just typed a bunch of stuff about today and my computer froze on me and I don't really feel like retyping it all, so I won't. lol. Well, it basically said I went to church today for my sister's confirmation. Which was a party. Saint Boniface...hahahaha. And and vegetables...hehehe cucumbers are vegetables...Lol! Ok then...anyways...after that my sisters and mom left for madison, so I'm all alone with Joey. Which sucks my big fat toe. But I escaped and went to Jackies house. Where I did the most funnest thing I had done in forever. I learned to drive. But shhh...u don't know that. it's highly confidential...but I'll tell you anyways. So yeah....Benton went to this parkign lot and I drove his truck around there at a whole 15 miles per hour...I know...I'm a rebel. And i didn't hit anything!!! Wooooooo! I can't believe him and jackie actually drove with me. They're nuts.

Anyways, So then to Jackies wehre we ate food. and then frolicked in the snow. Which was fun, but cold. Stupid benton. Probably pushed me inthe snow a billion times. But jackie and I eventually got him down. Ohh yeah...8-) <~ Means we're cool....anyways, then we went and drove around for a long time and went to random houses and did things. It was fun. Then we went to benton's and ate chocolate chips and then I got yelled at by my dad who told me to come home. Which sucked. Curfews suck. I can't wait until college. No curfew for me...wooo. I wanna listen to a song. Which one should I listen to??? Hmm..okie...we will go with my disney playlist. because I don't feel like switching songs. it's all there. In the play list. Crazy, eh? My hands are really dry. I need lotion. And nail polish remover. Hul hasn't made up his mind about TA yet. That stupid head. lol. I'm really tired. I should do some homework. I mean, I'm up anyways. Why not be productive? Ok...to Huck Finn. I shall converse later with you peoples. School monday...wooooo...::rolls eyes:: Why?!?!?!?!?!?! AHHH! Ok...night...lol..i know I told you, jackie, that this would be a long entry. But my computer restarted itself. meaning I wasn't meant to post it. So this is short. Many apoligizies. :-)

1 Pirate | X marks the spot


Toki

:: 2004 5 February :: 1.54am
:: Mood: frustrated

Stupid computer ::kicks computer:: ::again::: I HATE IT! So...ok..listen to my story. So, I did most of my huck finn prject. I was in the middle of it when the computer freezes..woo thank god i saved it i thought...so it comes back on..but My Documents won't open..shit...and microsoft word won't even open...double shit. That means not only can I not get to my half done project, but i can't even start a new one and it's due tomorrow and I'm screwed. So now my options are to A) Sleep B) Write out an essay right now on notebook paper or C) convince my paretns to let me miss 2nd period tomorrow. I like C...I'll see what I can do. I think I'm gonna start a new paper on notebook paper, so incase option C doesn't work so I can finish it and be like "Ms Mertz...:'(... I'm sorry". I'll have to cry. ::nods:: I just CAN'T turn it in late. I've never turned in anything late for lit. And I don't want a lower grade. I fucking did the project my computer just is being stupid. I hate this, This is crap....

So...umm..as long as I'm here I'll tell you about my day. I woke up at 7:30 and my pants were in the wash, so I put them in the dryer and Hul came at 7:57 and my pants were still wet. I wore them anyways. Then to breakfast then school....which wasn't bad. Failed a chem test for sure. Gym was awesome today!! Sarah chucked a ball at Jason and I hit Ms Bauer on the head with the ball..tehehehee...that's my excitment for the day. Then after school I went dress shopping and I found a dress. it's a secret though, cuz I don't want you all being like...ewwwwww...it looks good though. I like it. So does jorie and her mommy, so that counts for something, no? maybe? I dunno, I'm getting it tomorrow, you should come see it. After that I went to crew and sheeped with Jorie. Then after crew I found out that I'm in charge of props, which is purdy cool. I'm happyish. We also got shirt orders today. I don't knwo that to put on the back of mine though. Idears anyone? well....after that i got home and took a shower and ate and then my paper incident happened. So if you want to know about that go back to the top and read my rants....heeh it's like one continous cycle. Tehehe...Ok....I should be low tech papering. ::rolls eyes:; this sucks. Good night my friends.

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toki

:: 2004 3 February :: 10.40pm
:: Mood: frustrated

Grrrrrrr....I don't like being jealous. Nope. It's not fun. But she knows!!! Yet she's all "blah blah blaaaahhh" Grrrrrr....I don't want to be like this. I'm being stupid. ::evil glare:: gr gr gr...I don't like her...nope...I don't. Grrrrr...It's not anyone who has a journal here btw...so I don't hate any of you, you;re all awesome :-)

So as a slight sidenote...people suck. I don't understand people. I mean, why do they thinkt hey way they do? Why do they act the way they do? It's mind boggling. And rather annoying at times. So tommorow's a late start. I'm happy. That means sleeping in. Cuz I would go to breakfast..but no ride. Which sucks. But its the way the world turns. No one around here who's going. I hate living in libertyville. It sucks my big toe. Majorly. I have a quiz in chem tomorrow too. Wooo...::rolls eyes:: I can't wait to fail. I'm good at that, ya know. I try to tell myself that the more you fail, the more you'll apprieciate the one time you succeed. I dunno, brainwashing yourself is a good thing sometimes.

I think I'm expecting too much from my life right now. Nothing exciting is gonna happen. No matter what my feelings say, my life is forever mundane and useless. I would write a story about it, but the readers woudl fall asleep after the first page.

I stil have to study for chem, finish my Huck Finn thing up, and shower. I think I'm gonna give upon the first two, do chem tomorrow morning and finish Huck up tomorrow night. So I can shower now and wake up at 7:30...woo! that's awesome, no?? Ok..I think I'll do that...See you all later.

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