I guess I'm just a sheep too...

Am I as "Super Great" as I know I am?

A lot has happen in the past three days...

"Let me 'splain. [pause] No, there is too much. Let me sum up..."

Well my friends are back and my life doesn't suck that much anymore.

I've been talking to girls, and on top of that several of my friends are hooking me up on dates.

That's the sumary of the past few days...

Today I'll go into detail...

I woke up at the crack of noon...

I hoped to hear a familiar voice on my radio, but "the crotch" was on instead...

Went to give blood...

Hit on some girls while giving blood...

Determined that reading Dracula has given me a strange fascination with "my precious bodily fluids"...

Came home...

My friends D.D. and Dave came by...

We went to Best Buy, to meet some girl they thought I should talk to. (I think I might have already known her...)

Went to Target to do some shopping for my mom.

Went to gamestop with my friends, and bought a game...

Played BMX XXX (the game) with D.D. until he had to go home...

Sighed and realized that everything is gonna be alright...

"Even flow, thoughts arrive like butterflies
Oh, he don't know, so he chases them away
Someday yet, he'll begin his life again
Whispering hands, gently lead him away
Him away, him away...
Yeah!
Woo...ah yeah...fuck it up... "

Boy oh boy!

Next week, I will be working a total of Zero days. All I did was ask for the weekend off.

Well I guess it's a good thing considerng how much I've been swamped with things to do (NOT).

Yeah, my friend Aaron (the dueche)'s girlfriend talked with me a long time yesterday. It appears she has more faith than I do (in Aaron at least). We shall see.

On a whim I called David last night. The last time I called his phone was disconected. It was like the good old days. He is what a wing man should be. Not only may I double date with him soon, but he incouraged me to hit on the lovely employees at Meijer.

Me (to EXTREMLY HOT check out girl): So... you like working the late shift?

Her: It's ok... I get off at seven *wink

So yeah... if God chose to gave me insomnia last night I would have went back to see her. He didn't, so I didn't.

Oh well, another day...

Bring on the Polish Festival Parade!

I’m just so bored.

My loneliness and insecurities are gone; they’ve left me like the sweat that pours from my skin with each passing mile. I don’t run to get in shape. The truth is… I’m sure I could lose the weight faster if I gave up the Oreos. Running is therapeutic. I run to escape. Not from any of my worldly demons, because certainly the treadmill is not the best get away vehicle. But I am still running away from my greater demons. My past… My future... My utter weakness. I run.

Some people despise treadmills because the scenery never changes as time goes by. But with me… I change with every single mile. I get stronger. I gain confidence. I become more whole.

So far I have managed to keep the demons that haunted my soul last year at bay, but there is no need for rejoicing.

I am still alone. And therefore it is likely I may stumble and fall during my flight. But time is on my side. There is just over a month left until friendly familiar faces will once again surround me. Together we will finally vanquish my tormentors for good.

But until then…

I run.

I donno.

It's like someone flipped a switch and everything stopped making sence.

I guess I just have to wait until all this dust clears. There is a whole lot of freaking dust though.

Next year will be fun. Wont it?

Everything and nothing.
For a change, no one is on when I am writing this.

I bought a CD with Andy and I love it, but not for why I bought it.
It is “Sublime Acoustic: Bradley Nowell and Friends”.
Anyway at looking at the back I was impressed by the selection of both well-known songs and unknown gems. Anyway when Andy and I busted it open, of course the first things I wanted to hear were the songs I know.
The songs I know suck!
Well, not them, but these versions. For the most part they are from live performances where Bradley is stoned and forgets the lines, and just ends up singing a jumble of lines that are out of place and in some cases not in the right song. And it wasn’t done in such a way to make that cool. That or they sing half of one verse and end the song 43 seconds into it.
The unknown gems, upon listening to the entire CD, completely blow me away. My favorite right now is “Pool Shark”. They are like… I don’t know… sustenance.

Anyway.

I stand firm to my beliefs that Relationships are bad. I mean, Relationships are single handedly ruining relationships everywhere I look. Chill out everyone. Boyfriends and Girlfriends are mostly just boy friends and girl friends. If you expect something different you get something different. Lower your expectations, we are all just human. There is nothing really worth getting worked up as much as I’ve seen people getting worked up. I mean if there are issues because people are not living up to some expectations that you are holding them to. Fricking, talk to them. This is not the seventh grade. Don’t tell your friends something that you should be telling the one you love. If things aren’t working out there are a lot of other fish in this crazy sea. Chill out and pop in some Sublime!

(Tell me, are you a badfish too?)

My friend Aaron is a douche.

In case you are exactly clear with my diction. A douche is a guy who is total unworthy of the woman he is with. My friend Aaron deserves this esteemed title, because he is cheating on his girlfriend of two years. (I am 93% sure) I hate people who are unfaithful. I especially hate it when it’s to such a nice girl. His girlfriend’s name is Lauren, and she’s about as nice a person as you can meet. (Stacey hated her, but that’s because Lauren was twice the woman Stacey was).

I hate my job.

I am working o1 day next week. ONE! I only asked for two days off. I probably will work more, because my friend Tom has to visit his College and I’m gonna cover for him. But still ONE SCHEDULED DAY!

I’ve seen a lot of movies. Damn near all the ones worth seeing. I saw “Pirates…” today. Good movie, even with my low expectations. I still should see LXG, and maybe Charlie’s Angels. I’m still holding out on seeing Finding Nemo until I can dupe a girl into seeing with me. I’m not exactly holding my breath. (Not because I’m a loser or anything, just the fact I rarely converse with females and those that I do don’t fit the criteria.)

Man the house is empty, I could have a huge party tonight, but as always no one is near.

I think I’ll turn in early.

Ok…

I really don’t want to have that talk again ever.

I know it all already.

I’ll find my special someone someday, I know.

I’m not as bad off as I once was.

I’m more humored than anything.

Let’s make a list…

I’m not particularly unattractive.
I’m in great health.
I like to think I’m funny.
I’m relatively easy to get along with.
I enjoy cooking AND cleaning.
I’m somewhat smart.
I’m faithful.
I’m flexible.
I try to be a gentleman.
I’m about as romantic as a person can physically be.
I enjoy long walks on the beach and candle light dinners.
And I’m nowhere near as conceited as I sound right now.

It’s only a matter of time before I find a woman.

I’m not looking for Mrs. Right or anything. I just want a girl that I can see “Finding Nemo” with (I’m sure as HELL am not seeing it with my womanizing friend Aaron). After that we can both go on our seperate ways. I don’t want any love or sex right now. I assume that will come with time, when I am more ready for them. I just need some “arm-candy”.

I just want a reason to shave off my ratty goatee.

I've had a bad day
"In this bright future you can’t forget your past cause it won’t last, yeah
So dry your tears and now I say to all the men that had to lead the way

No woman no cry,
No woman no cry
No woman no cry,
No woman no cry, yeah"

I donno.

I just feel like it's all so far away. I just need to hear someones voice. It's so damn quiet here.

*sigh

I'm finally back...

Well.. since I last talked with ya'll. I've been on a "Million calorie A Day" work out plan, and I feel great.

Not much else goes on in my life though.

I'm a shell, but damn...

I have abs!

SSDD
Not much happens in my life...

I found out I'm only working 2 days next week. Oh boy, what will I do with the money?

I think my e-mail might not be working. My dad said he sent one but I didn't get it. Infact I haven't gotten any in a week. If you wanna be a friend send me a line...
kup64@hotmail.com

I was in the mood for working out today. Infact I was on the tredmill quite a long time. I burned over a million calories (1,024,000 I believe).

oh well