:: 2003 30 October :: 7.20 pm

i dont know.
wow, im pathetic, i miss sean so much, i havent talked to him for like...a day, wow.
thats so long...grr.
i hate this....i hate this so much. i was so mean to him...i told him to never talk to me again unless he had made up his mind...i dont know why im giving in now, but it just feels right...so yea.
i dont make any sense and i really dont care, think what you want, but you arent me so you wont understand....so hate me if you wish [people that i know hate me for this]
i keep listening to konstantine and it reminds me of sean...everything does, and i dont even know why...grr, everything is sean, life is sean...he is everywhere.
i need to cut again, but i promised nikki i wouldnt and i love her to death, so i cant. grr...i need to get rid of the pain, this sucks.
i am going to breakdown and that cant happen. it just cant.
im going to end up cutting my hair again, if i cant cut myself, and this sucks, because i like my hair now, but whatever.
i feel alone, i have no one or anything, and i hate whining about it because i sound like a drama queen and people hate me for it, but oh well.
and in home ec, i named my baby gingerbread because my baby has red hair and it reminds me of my mommies gingersnaps..i know im weird. but oh well.
him...grr, everyone should know by now who *him* is...this whole thing just makes me mad, i love him so much, and hes happy, and i just ruin everything...but thats all i want for him...happyness...just to be happy.

this is what i have been thinking about all day...and it doesnt help much at all. so bye.

whit

4 READ | CMNT

:: 2003 30 October :: 6.47 pm

answer this pleesh
i stole this from erica [sorry]
but pleeeeesh fill it out for me, EVERYONE
it will make me happy :]

1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
2. Am I loveable?
3. How long have you known me?
4. When and how did we first meet?
5. What was your first impression?
6. Do you still think that way about me now?
7. If I was an ice cream flavor, which would I be and why?
8. Am I a dork?
9. What makes me happy?
10. What makes me sad?
11. What song (if any) reminds you of me?
12. If you could give me anything what would it be?
13. Do you consider me a good friend?
14. When's the last time you saw me?
15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
16. Would you make a move on me?
17. Describe me in one word.
18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
20. Do I cross your mind at least 2 times a day?


and some quizzes for you guys


You're Gangsta Bitch Barbie. You're tough and you
like it rough, and of course you like to pop a
cap in any wiggers ass.


If You Were A Barbie, Which Messed Up Version Would You Be?
brought to you by Quizilla



You come from the Night Sky. You're drawn to the
stars and planets, and it's no wonder why, you
came from them.


Where Did Your Soul Originate?
brought to you by Quizilla



Congratulations!! You're a shot of some good old
hard liquor!


What Drink Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla



What Kind of Drunk Are You?

1 READ | CMNT

:: 2003 29 October :: 2.38 pm
:: Mood: hate
:: Music: tsl :: im real

3 READ | CMNT