newness...
woo! lots of new stuff...i finally made my community...i have one person in it! awwsumish! its under my makeawish username...uhh...im trying to think of other new stuff...i..erm... think im going to make a list of things about me...that sounds like a plan...uhm..yeah..
you know you love me,
whitney

i cant think of one...umm...pickles?
i just changed the whole look of this thingamabob...comment if you want, also im thinking about starting up a community...woo...ill have like my own little boards...how..fun. but its not like anyone reads my journal anyways...

oh and heres this thingy..i liked this...my friend showed me...
if you slit your wrists... and you lay there dying, would you feel yourself slip away? Would things grow faint at the edges... or would you just wait... would it be sudden, when the light came... when you looked back and saw your body, would you feel sadness, anger, frustration, regret? Would you recognize yourself? Or would you stare in shock at the shell you thought for so long your ally, and ponder it's alien shape? Would you wonder when you became a stranger? Or could you pinpoint the moment when you knew this was no longer you? Or perhaps, you never really knew yourself, you just thought you did. You tricked yourself for all those years... you might have known the inside, thought when you looked into your eyes you saw a face you would know forever... but really all along, there was a stranger in your face.

Perhaps every time we lose someone, we die a little. Some we lose suddenly, we know they are going... but we never expect it to be as soon as it is, we always think we will have tomorrow. Some we lose overnight. One day you are laughing, and then next, saying goodbye. And some we've lost before we lose them... we feel them fading at the edges... we wonder, as they grow faint, who they really were... if they ever really loved us... if they ever really will. And sometimes, you can pinpoint that moment, when your stomach turned inward upon itself, and you died to shed a tear... in anger, frustration, regret... sadness... because you knew from that moment, it would never be the same. And like an insubstantial hand, reaching to touch your own face for one last time... you wish just once, you could touch them.

you know you love me,
whitney

someones day was fine, another one gone, but they still have tomorrow to cry away...
blah...thats one line from this poem i read...it doesnt make sense...but its a lot better than "ATTACK OF THE SURVEYS!!!"
well...im posting various surveys i found....enjoy the torture...

1. Full name: whitney nicole _ _ _ _ _ _ _
2. Birthday: july 19th
3. Location: raleigh, nc
4. Where else have u lived: no where :[
5. School/mascot/colors:
my school sucks ass…ish not worth mentioning :]
6. Zodiac sign: cancer…even my zodiac sign is fucked up…ish named after a pathetic illness
7. Shoe size: 7
8. Height: 5'4...ima shorty…don’t make fun of me :[
10. Pets: 2 kitties!!!
11. Siblings: 1
12. Eye color: brown
13. Hair color: brownish redish…
14. Hair length: hard to explain…you should know
16. What color?: i aready answered that...?
17. Grade: you know that already..a der der
18. Are u good in school?: i try….sometimes :]
19. hobbies: friends, aim/aol, jason, kenny, someone i cant name…for they have a gf…but i will always love them with all my heart :] …and they should know it…oh and just incase i ever forget to tell…i love you..youre the best thing in my life…i don’t know what id do without you…thanks for everything…youre the best, skateboarding, listening to music, going to the movies…the usual
20. Nicknames: erm…whit?
21. What languages do you speak?: english…wooo!! go me!!!
22. Do you play sports?: …e skateboard?
23. Where were you born?: raleigh! wooo!
24. Are you a night or a morning person?: morning and night person…depends…
25. Are you ticklish?: yesh…
26. Do you believe in god?: sorta kinda…
27. Do you have any other screen names?: no…im not coolish enough to have more than one sn…
28. What are they?: i just told you e didn’t have anymore!! don’t rub it in my face!!!
29. Do you have braces?: retainer :[
30. Do you have glasses/ contacts?: nope 20/20 vision :D

!!!getting personal!!!!
31. What do you want to be when you grow up?: probably a fashion designer or a model…im obsessed with clothes
32. What was the worst day of your life?: when someone special said they hated me and to “never fucking talk to me” and that they didn’t love me…oh well!
33. What is your most embarrassing story?: i don’t really have that many…
34. What has been the best day of your life?: the day i met someone special!!!
35. What comes first in your life?: family and friends
36. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/crush?: yesh, and something that cant be explained…
37. What are you most scared of?: the one person who is worth living for not knowing how i feel…and not caring either…
38. If you had an extra set of eyes were would you put them?: on my ass, hehe…
39. What do you usually think about before you go to bed?: put everything together that happened that day…and I know you are really getting tired of this…but someone special!!!
40. What do you regret the most?: not realizing what you have until its all gone
41. If you could do anything without consequences, what would u do?: a lot!!! lmfao…

....favorites....
42. Movie: i don’t have one :]
43. Song: left coast envy by tsl!!! lots of others by tsl...and she cries by rufio
44. Band/group: tsl, rufio, tbs…lots more
45. Store: hot topic, miss sixty nyc
46. Relative: my cousin
47. Sport: …skateboarding…didn’t i tell you already?
48. Vacation spot: hmm…i don’t know…
49. Ice cream flavor: chocolate chip cookie dough!!!!!!
50. Fruit: strawberries of course
51. Candy: chocolate stuff
52. Car: i don’t have one..wooo!
53. Class: mr grosbeaks english
54. Holiday: halloween and my b-day, hehe
55. Day of the week: friday and saturday!!
56. Color: black and pink/red
57. Magazine: vogue
58. Name for a girl: not whitney…and e havent really thought about it…
59. Name for a boy: err…sean!
60. Sports team: i don’t have one…
61. Month: july…or any month in the winter
62. Man athlete: i don’t have one…ish that bad? : \
63. Female athlete: i don’t have one of those either…
64. Actress: julia roberts, reese witherspoon
65. Actor: erm…johnny depp…for obvious reasons…haha
66. Tv show: erm…i don’t have one of those either!!!
67. Web site: erm…i have too many to choose just one…
68. Animal: tiger!! grrrr!!!!!!
69. E-mail buddy: erm…rach, or sean
70. Joke: my inside joke with sean…erm…cucumbers!!!!!! haha…
71. Saying: uh…. i don’t have one…do i need help?
72. Word: um…ish!!!!!!!!!
73. Brand of shoes: converse, or erm…vans :]
74.Radio station: vanswarpedtour on radio@aol…spiffy
75. Room in your house: my room
76. Concert you have been to: warped tour…and soon to be the tsl concert im going to in sept!!
77. Cd: burned CD's i make…all my favorite songs!!!
78. President: do you think i really care?
79. Salad: erm…i don’t like salad…food in general ish evolish…
80. Meat: meat ish the evolist of it all!!!
81. Pizza topping: cheeeeese
82. State: nc!!!!!!
83. City: nyc…im going there!!! woot!
84. Lake: erm…the lake at ccr that almost killed me!?!??
85. Ocean: atlantic?
86. Place to be: erm…
87. Smell: citrisy smells…i don’t know why…
88. Sound: rain falling
89. Taste: erm…
90. Feeling: love/ happiness
91. College: …uhhh???
92. Number: 4!
93. Book: confessions of a teenage drama queen
94. Vacation spot: you already asked me this…
95. Grandma: well…they are dead..so i don’t know :[
96. Grandpa: well..all but one ish dead..and i don’t particularly like the living one…
97. Cereal: umm…

^^^^in the past 24 hours have you^^^^
152. Had a serious talk?: depends what you would call serious…
153. Hugged someone?: yesh, of course
154. Fought with a friend?: yesh actually…i think…yesh im pretty sure
155. Cried?: not exactly…
156. Laughed?: yesh!!!!!
157. Made someone laugh?: of course im just hilarious…no not really…but someone laughed!! woo!
158. Bought something?: yesh
159. Cut your hair?: nope…cant say i have…
160. Felt stupid?: yesh…all the time
161. Talked to someone you love?: …yeah…
162. Missed someone?: yeah..just don’t even go there…

????have you ever????
163. Done drugs?: would you concider alcohol a drug?
164. Eaten an entire box of oreos?: no… that’s gross…an ENTIRE box?
165. Been dumped?: sorta…it was mutual
166. Had someone be unfaithful to you?: yesh…I have
167. Watched punky brewster?: i think so...a reallly long time ago
168. Hiked a mountain?: yuppers!
169. Stayed home on saturday night, just because?: sure
171. Seen the white house?: yesh
172. Seen the eiffel tower?: no…i want to though
173. Tried smoking?: yeah
174. Drank alcohol?: yesh
175. Smoked marijuana?: nope
176. Played monopoly?: yesh..i.its boring..i hate that game
178. Seen titanic?: yeah
179. Kissed someone?: yesh!
180. French kissed someone?: yeah…
181. Lost your virginity?: im an angel O:] …what do YOU think?
182. Tried a weight loss program?: no
183. Jumped on a trampoline?: yesh!! woo!
184. Visited another country?: nope..
185. Colored in a coloring book(and had fun)?: …sure…
186. Had a bubble bath?: yesh
187. Been on a plane?: yesh…its scary..i don’t like flying…gah…
188. Been on a boat?: yesh
189. Been on a train?: yuppers
190. Been in a car accident?: mhmm
191. Ridden an elephant?: no :[
192. Made a web page?: yesh..of course
193. Played with barbies?: err…
194. Stayed up all night?: yesh!!
195. Shoved stuff under your bed to make your room look clean?: lol…
196. Broken a bone?: yes
197. Called a physchic or sex hotline?: lol noooo!!!
198. Watched jerry springer?: yesh…kate hahaha!!!!
199. Gotten in trouble for talking in class?: yesh…
200. Been afraid of the dark?: im not really afraid of THE DARK…unlike some people…im afraid of WHAT is in the dark…
201. Been in the hospital(not visiting)?: yupz
202. Had stitches?: noooo
203. Dumped someone and regretted it?: yesh…
204. Went out with more than one person at a time?: well…ive dated around and not been commited with one person only…so i wasn’t really going out with them…so um…yeah…
205. Lied?: yesh…hasn’t everyone?
206. Been arrested?: lol..no…
207. Fallen asleep in class?: not really…
208. Used food for something other than to eat?: hahaha!
209. Met a celebrity?: yesh… <3333 kenny !!!!!
210. Broken the law?: …yesh…
212. Hated yourself?: yeah…
213. Been brokenhearted?: yesh, I still am…
214. Broken someones heart?: ..yesh.
215. Wanted to kill someone?: …yeah but i havent …so that’s..erm… a plus! woo!
216. Fell off a chair?: haha yeah…don’t get me started…
217. Lap danced?: haha!!!!
218. Been in a fist fight?: no
219. Been in a cat fight?: lmfao…

~~~~do you~~~~
220. Like to give hugs?: ern,,,sure
221. Like to walk in the rain?: yesh! I <3 the rain!
222. Sleep with or without clothes on?: i SLEEP with clothes on …
223. Prefer black or blue pens?: blackness
224. Dress up on halloween?: err…
225. Have a job?: yupz
226. Like to travel?: yesh!!!
227. Like someone? do they know?: yesh!!!
228. Sleep on your side, tummy or back?: whatevers comfyish…
229. Think your attractive?: no!!! woot! go me!!!
230. Want to marry? who?: yeah...I know who too…but its probably only temporary…
231. Have a goldfish?: used too!
232. Ever have the falling dream?: yesh…they freak me out
233. Have stuffed animals?: yesh!
234. Go on vacation?: yeah…doesn’t everyone?

*~*~other~*~*
235. Do you belive in the horoscopes: …er…sure…
236. Do you like your handwriting: no not really…am i really supposed to?
237. If you could be anybody, who would you be and why: i don’t really wanna be anyone else…
238. What superhero would you be: erm…
239. Do you have any piercings: ears, lip, and soon lip! :D
240. Any tattoos: no…I want one though!!!
241. If so where:__
242. If not, where and what do you want: my lower back i want a fairy…im not sure why…i just do…so yeah…
243. Are you picky: not especially
244. What makes you cry: boys, getting in DEEP SHIT, death…
245. What makes you mad: rude people that have no feeling but for themselves, backstabbers, lying, cheating, people who think they are happy with someone but DESERVE MUCH BETTER and wont shut up about the one person that is wasting their time…gah…people who don’t care that you love them, the ending of blue crush, certain people i wont mention…
246. What do you think of eminem: blah…
247. Who do you admire: admire how?
248. Do you like cartoons: not especially…
249. Do you believe in the devil: er…
250. What is the one place you have to visit before you die: france
251. What did you do today: updated journal, talked to twinny, hung out with Jason/did my homework…erm…yeah.
252. Where do you work: well, whoever will give me a job…my agency sucks…
253. Do you even have a job you lazy bum: YESH
254. Are your 'rents lame: sorta kinda…
255. Do you own a miniskirt: err…

257. What is the farthest your have traveled: uhh…
258. Who is a diva: erm…i don’t really care…madonna?
259. What kind of shampoo do you use: herbal essences..woot!
260. What about conditioner: same as above
261. Do you use big words to sound smart: sometimes lol….
262. When you get mad, do you swear a lot: hell yeah!
263. Got milk: …grilled cheese…
264. Do you have a magic 8 ball: a pink one! wooo!
265. Name something that comes in threes: triplets, sometimes pens, tricycle wheels…erm…
266. Ever worn black nail polish: yuppers…im wearing it right now!! woo…go me!
267. Do you have hairy arms: with?
268. How many sheets are on your bed: err..
269. Whats under your bed: uhh…
270. Do you have your own tv and vcr: yupz..so special…
271. Do you believe in fate: yeah to a point
272. Do you see dead people: ..maybe lol
273.Are you a good speller: sometimes..but not really…
274. What is your lucky charm: err…
276. Do you like little kids: sure
277. Are you talented: …in some areas…
278. If so, how: lmfao…er…
279. Ever hugged a tree: of course
280. Do you watch the weather channel while getting ready in your hotel room on vacation: lol this one time…
281. Do you ever steal anything from hotels: my mommie takes the little shampoo and stuff
282. Ever seen a ghost: seen?
283. How about an alien: does my sister count?
284. Do you beleive in either of them: i dunno

%%%%what do you think about%%%%
285. Abortion: id never do it…but what happens if i got raped..ahh…
286. Bill clinton: i think that hes a man-whore…don’t ask…
287. Smoking: doesn’t bother me
288. Eating disorders: its really sad…
289. Rape: i would never wish that on anyone ever no matter how much i hated them…that’s just gross
290. Jerry springer: haha!!
291. Suicide: blah…don’t ask…
292. South park: erm…
293. Summer: boring sometimes…but fun
294. Tattoos: woo!
295. Peircing: sexyish!!!!!
296. Make-up: sure
297. Drinking: …haha.
298. Guys: heartbreakers, lovers, sweet..some of them, and the other stuff you don’t even wanna know what i think…
299. Girls: most of them are ok…

what do you think when you hear this name:
300. Jennifer: mommie
301. Leah: PREP!!!!!! […sam yelling that]
302. Megan: mccormick
303. Brandon: …haha…
304. Christina: slut
305. Angela: my mommies friend…
306. Courtney: erm…nothing comes to mind…
307. Jeff: …owens.
308. Mike: …some guy my friend nikki talks about…
309. Nikki: my friend nikki
310. Ryan: ryry!
311. Lauren: school
312. Derek: erm…nothing comes to mind
313. Lisa: kudrow
314. Kristi: erm…nothing comes to mind…
315. Matt: i HATE that name…my dads name…
316. Holly: Christmas
317. Jackie: kennedy
318. Cait: erm…
319. Caroline: it makes me think of carolina…
320. Suzie: erm…i don’t know…
321. Sebb: sp…blah…
322. Patrick: this weird guy in elementary school that would pick his nose…sick…
323. Erin: this girl in my old neighborhood

*~*~your friends~*~*
333. Friends: too many to name them all :D
334. Best friend: jason, kate, twinny, megan
335. Spend most time with: jason
336. Best house: umm... kate…its never boring! woo!
337. Funniest: erm…kate
338. Smartest: everyone but me…im slow…haha
339. Hottest: JASON!!!!!! …he looks like kenny…wooo!
340. Strongest: sam
341. Most athletic: ....probably sam too
342. the best: we're all so damn good…lol
343. Most outgoing: erm…e don’t know…
344. Most shy: megan
345. Always negative: erm…i don’t know…
346. Which one let the dogs out: the stupid farmers!!! they let koko out!!!! … lol kate…
347. Most trustworthy: twinny, jason or megan
348. Most fun to be with: jason
349. Biggest flirt: …i don’t know…
350. Best dressed: hmm…
351. Best eyes: jason…
352. Most depressed: me and rachy probably…
353. One to gossip with: RACH! haha…
354. Sweetest: jason..of course!!!
355. Who has the best room: uhh…
356. Who follows you: …it seems like sam was stalking me at one point…
357. Who do you follow: nobody…i don’t stalk people…that’s just weird…
358. Who do you pretend to like but cant stand: haha…rach knows this one…
359. Do you make friends easily: yeah..sure…
360. Are you intimidated by any of your friends: noppers
361. If u were stranded on a desert island then who, out of your friends, would u want to be there with you: someone special…
362. Who do u think would help u the most if u were in trouble: jason
363. Who do u think would risk their life to save yours: …i think jason…
364. Who is the most popular: …i don’t know?
365. Who is the most unpopular: err…
366.Who do u want to go to college with: …i don’t know…
367. Who do u wish could be part of your family: uhh…i don’t know that either…
368. Who is the biggest junk food junkie: kate…haha
369. Who would do anything for 1 million bucks: erm…i don’t know…am i supposed to know?
370. Who do u think has the nicest siblings: erm…kate
371. Who do u think has the nicest mom: kate
372. Who do u think has the nicest dad: lol def. not kate this time…uhh..id say megan
373. Who do you have the most inside jokes with: me and kate…lol we have waaaaay too many!

*~*~which way would you spell it~*~*
374. Megan or meghan: megan
375. Lacey or lacy: lacy
376. Steven or stephen: steven
377. Kurt or curt: kurt
378. Caryn or karen: karen
379. Mark or marc: mark
380. Brandi or brandy: brandy
381. Eric or erik: eric
382. Corrine or carine: I would never even use that name…gah…
383. Kari or carrie: carrie
384. Jackie or jackqui: jackie
385. Deseray or desirae: desirae
387. Amy or aimee: amy
388. Bradi or brady: brady
389. Chelsea or chelsey: chelsey
390. Katelyn or kaitlyn: kaitlyn
391. Ashley or ashleigh: ashley
392. Geoffrey or jeffrey: jeffrey
393. Their or there: there
394. Two, too, or to: to
395. Here or hear: here