:: 2007 16 April :: 5.11 pm

A lot of bad things have happened today.
None of which I care to discuss openly to everyone.
I got my hair cut today.
I think its too short.
It was supposed to be just a trim.
Anyway.. I have nothing really important to say.
Oh, my sister got a new puppy.
Her name is Belle. And she is either a lab/boxer mix or a shepard/pitbull mix.
She's cute!

4 *gazer*s | *watch the stars fall*

:: 2007 12 April :: 6.02 pm

So I had a terrible morning.
I had this bad feeling when I woke up this morning.
I knew that for some reason I wasn't supposed to go to work this morning, but I went anyway because I'm stupid.
On my way to work, I don't know why other than maybe Im slightly not all there, I took County Farm road.
Mind you, County farm has like 6 curves, and they aren't small either.
Well I became friends with a ditch.
And almost some trees.
I did a few 360's.
And sat there as I shook extremely bad and tried not to cry my little eyes out while I called Mike and said "hey call someone with a truck to come pull me out of this HUGE ditch"
And so who does he get to come get me and take me to work so that he can come get the car out when he gets out of work, Paula, his daughters mother.
If that didn't make the situation worse enough, I lost a contact somewhere between my car and getting into hers.
So I had to go the entire day wearing one contact.
Also, I had to take a blueprint/metrology test after work.
Which I managed to pass with a 100%.

Oh and yesterday, Joe's (my mom's boyfriend) dad died.
Today would be his birthday.
He was the crankiest old man on the planet.
So I feel bad about that.
But this evening should be better.
I get to meet Daryl's daughter.
Im excited about that because I guess she's really cute..
Oh and I am really really tan!

*watch the stars fall*

:: 2007 11 April :: 8.47 pm

This has got to be the longest week I have had in a long time.
Sunday was alright but the few hours i spent with my mom were long and dreaded.
Monday I vaguely remember what I did monday.
I believe I went tanning, and then came home to sit my happy ass in bed like usual.
Tuesday I had a blueprint metrology class after work and then didn't rest until about 9.
Today I didn't rest until about 10 minutes ago, and I am still attempting to find ambition to clean and finish up laundry after taking his daughter to soccer practice and then taking him to work and all that gay stuff.
Tomorrow will be the same repetitious circle as Tuesday.
Im hoping that I will be able to see Daryl before the 19th but at this rate, that won't happen.
My phone is a hunk of shit.
I am so sick of it NOT working correctly.
Katelyn is having a girl.
But she won't name her Raychel.
However I do not blame her.
Anyway..

1 *gazer* | *watch the stars fall*

:: 2007 8 April :: 6.01 pm

I have yet to believe things could be better than what they are right now.
I am insanely happy.

3 *gazer*s | *watch the stars fall*

:: 2007 1 April :: 4.00 am

The craziest shit just happened.
Mike and I were dead asleep and next thing you know, theres some guy I've never met before but he has, standing in our bedroom.
It scared the piss out of the both of us.
Who knows how the guy got here, he's trashed.
He told Mike several different stories.
The guy wasn't wearing any shoes.
And he pissed all over my bathroom floor.
I was enraged when I discovered it.
So now Mike is out trying to find a place for this guy to stay as I sit here confused and scared with the door locked and all the lights on.
It's messed up!

4 *gazer*s | *watch the stars fall*

:: 2007 27 March :: 7.31 pm

I honestly do not understand why I do this to myself day in and day out.
I eat until I feel like my belly is going to blow into thousands of pieces.
And as I sit miserably not knowing whether or not I am going to be sick or just burp, I fear the next few moments.

Anyway gossip is my enemy.
Tanning is my friend.
I hate "he said he was told by this chick that her boyfriend told her that you told him that the first guys wife thinks......" shit.
It's all a bunch of 5th grade BS.
I'm sick of it.
It's pretty pathetic that because 40 year olds can't get along they have to drag a 19 year old into the middle of it just because they all know that person.
LAME.
I'm sooooo sick of people saying I said shit about them.
Seriously, If Im going to talk shit, I'll say it directly to the person Im saying it about.
Not a big train of people..
Retards anyway.

My poor private areas are burnt.
Ah well, it's all for a good cause.

*watch the stars fall*

:: 2007 25 March :: 7.46 pm

I got a bonus from work on friday.
Got it, spent it, wish I still had it.
Did my taxes, finally.
Went tanning.
Can't wait until I go again tomorrow.
Did my womanly duties around the house. (Cleaning)
Watched the Departed, and Harsh Times.
Tonight is a night for Desperate Housewives and Rocky Balboa.
Ooh, and I don't have to sleep alone tonight.

1 *gazer* | *watch the stars fall*

:: 2007 17 March :: 9.38 pm

You want a rant? I'll give you a rant.
For the record, I don't do drugs.
Drugs are not the reason for my increased weight loss.
I haven't ever done drugs. I have no intention of ever doing drugs.
And Mike doesn't do them either.
I wouldn't date someone who does drugs because they make me uncomfortable, and it's not something that I want to be a part of my life.
If you really knew me, you'd know that.
The reason I have limited my friends to a few, is because a lot of the time they only want me to come party with them.
I'm not a big 'i like to party' kind of person.
Plus, during the week, I don't feel like doing shit, because I have to get up at 4:30 every morning.
And for a person that needs atleast 8 hours of sleep a night my days are cut short.
My weekends consist of me sharing a vehicle.
It sucks, trust me.
But I don't see any of you making an effort to come my way.
God for bid you drive to come see me.
It won't kill you.
You don't like my boyfriend, and there are various reasons, some of them I know, but I am dying to hear all of them.

He doesn't hold me captive.
He doesn't control me.
I make my own decisions.
And if anyone gets treated like shit, it's him.
I am a total jack-ass.

I don't see why I get so pissed about stuff like this, when I shouldn't have to justify myself.
I shouldn't make my decisions based on what makes you guys happy.
The only person that has been supportive of my being with Mike, is Carley.
And I thank her for that.

You all amaze me.

10 *gazer*s | *watch the stars fall*