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godessalthena

:: 2018 10 January :: 6.47pm

feeling small and a million miles away

I just want to shrink until I cease to exist

The thickest dirt and the darkest mud
Deepest charcoal soot and dirt
Mix up the ashes until I disappear

No warrior no Amazon no savior
Just weak and pathetic
Minimalist imprints breathless walking

Leave me behind and forget
I am gone

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godessalthena

:: 2018 10 January :: 7.53am

I've been sleeping a lot lately, but not the nice restful kind, rather the kind where you just spin all night then wake up 2 hours early and can't get back to sleep.

I'm sad today. I just want to hide under a rock and pretend I don't exist. Hopefully I get an early out today.

My last check was $200 short, which hurt a little, but it's nice not having to worry about rent or a car payment. What are student loans going to do? Rape me and steal my dog? Well maybe with this new president.... Should I worry? Haha

But 2 appointments with my therapist costs about $200 and having so much time away from work has really helped my mental health lately. More than seeing my therapist, so I'll take the loss and mark it as a win.

I just have to say, after spending close to $500 on gifts for my sweetie for Xmas if he doesn't get me a good damned bathrobe for a super late gift I'm going to he so mad.

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godessalthena

:: 2018 2 January :: 8.46am

I hate feeling like a conspiracy theorist but the older I get the harder it is to ignore that every problem in America was and is manufactured by the government/the wealthy to keep the masses controlled, weak and leached of any resources.

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godessalthena

:: 2017 31 December :: 8.28am

there ain't nothing better than blowing smoke screens into sunbeams on a lazy weekend morning

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godessalthena

:: 2017 30 December :: 7.34am

Discovering my dairy allergy has been the single most depressing thing that has happened to me in a while.

I miss cheese. And eating food like a normal human being. I miss not waking up to a nuclear holocaust in my GI tract for having some cheese & cream sauce.

I miss cream cheese on bagels
I miss cheese bagels
I miss food.

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goodbye

:: 2017 29 December :: 9.35am

Idgaf mothafucka.

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goodbye

:: 2017 24 December :: 5.22pm

I am tired of being made to feel bad about every little fucking miscommunication. I don't deserve that. I'm a good person.

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goodbye

:: 2017 20 December :: 10.01pm

I am the mountain and you are the rain and clouds over me that will pass. I will remain strong.

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goodbye

:: 2017 20 December :: 12.44am

I don't need to be anything more than what I already am ♥

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godessalthena

:: 2017 18 December :: 10.53pm
:: Mood: pensive

Freedom is what you do with what is done to you.

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godessalthena

:: 2017 18 December :: 10.59am

When I say the bridge is burned it stays fucking burned

When I say things are over they are over.

If you all want to waste your time worrying about what I'm doing, help yourself, but I don't give a fuck about you or what you think.

Leave me the fuck alone.

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goodbye

:: 2017 15 December :: 10.00am

I saw Star Wars last night. There are sooo many things I want to say but no one to talk to about it.

Without ruining it I'll say I enjoyed Adam Driver's acting most of all.

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godessalthena

:: 2017 3 December :: 12.58am

You insist I stay home when you go out to have fun

Makes me feel like I'm the secret

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godessalthena

:: 2017 2 December :: 9.48am

when the puzzle is made of squares and you are a hideously deformed circle piece

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godessalthena

:: 2017 30 November :: 12.06am

the warm embrace of a friend

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