lala91
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::
2004 2 July :: 5.21pm
im at mias. fun... cept shes leavin me for like 1o days. why is everyone leavin?! well i think goldman is comin over tomorrow. goin to a 4th of july thing. miss moore, you should spend the night with me n kayla. or do somethinng with us.. hows bout tomorrow during the day? ya free? lol. bailey, mia wanted me to tell you that you have her pants. she sed you wore them to our b-day party. the pants with the balls. well.. i guess ill just get them the next time i see you. me n mia got our eyebrows waxed today. we got this 80 year old lady who did it. and she sucked. omg im gonna miss mia SO much!! SO much!!! more then anyone! lol. she walks in on mark and daniela.. and mark comes out and trys to grab mia and she jumped and screamed "DONT TOUCH ME WITH THOSE HANDS!!" lol. i love her. she enjoys walkin in on her brother. lol. no knockin.
just wanted to give out journal sites to ppl..
www.woohu.com/~bugga3
bailey
www.livejournal.com/~kayla_g
kayla goldman
www.livejournal.com/~tipsybabii
mia
www.livejournal.com/~_canes04_
callis
www.woohu.com/~thoughtskill
britts
.::love you::.
-x0
glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lisalion816
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::
2004 2 July :: 8.14am
ok...here is the address where you guys can write me until august:
Lisa Tous
c/o Sven Persson
Barrvägen 4
S-446 35 Älvängen
Sweden
Stay cool, literally....and i'll try and stay warm..
Later...
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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Rina
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::
2004 2 July :: 7.44am
Hey, i guess i was lying when i said i wouldn't be able to update from Sweden.
Because, look at me. I'm updating. In sweden. it is so great here you can not imagine.
send me a letter. i will send you a postcard.
Carina Tous
c/o Sven Persson
Barrvägen 4
S-446 35 Älvängen
Sweden
See you when school starts.
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lisalion816
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::
2004 2 July :: 7.24am
Hey!
I am now in sweden and freezing. Go figure. Today we went to a castle that was built in 1320. Its mostly in ruines but its still cool.
the flight sucked. it was long...11 hours or so
great now im getting yelled at to get off since everyone needs to check their mail right this second....geeze!
Later....when i have internet access once again...
glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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2004 30 June :: 12.26am
oops i did it again
i played with your heart
got lost in the game
"oooh" baby baby
oops you think im in LOOOVE
that im sent from aboooovvveeee
im not that inecent (h/e you spell it)
you see mah problem is this (i think thats it)
im dreamin away
wishin that heroes they truly exist
i cry watchin the days
cant you see im a fool in so many ways
but to lose ALLLL myyyee senses
that is just so typically me!!
ooooooh baby baby
^^^ me n lacey wrote that song!! lmfao!!! i love you laceeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
ooh baby baby (she seems to say that a lot) (actually, we say it a lot b/c ya know.. we wrote it lmao)
how was i supposed to know
that somethin wasnt right here
oooh baby baby
i shouldnt have let you goooooooooo
but now your outta sight yeah
show me
how you want it to be
tell me baby cause i need to know now
what we got
my lonliness is killin me
"aaaannnnndddddd iiiiiii"
i must confess i still beleive
"STILL BELEIVE"
when im not with you i lose mah mind
give me a SIIIGGGGGNNNNN
HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME!!!
^^^ n therrs another one
we decided to make a remix of one of britneys famous songs "im not a girl not yet a woman" (beleive it or not.. we didnt write that one)[[question by kayla:: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU?!]]
i used to think
i had the answers to everything
but now i know
that lyposuction doesnt always go my way
yeaaahhh
feels like im caught in the ________ (open for suggestions)
thats when i realize
im not a chub
not yet bulimic
all i need is time
a tiolet that is mine
while im releasing
im not a chub
there is no need to feed me
its time that i learn the new carb diet on my own
i've weighed so much more then you know nowww
so dont tell me im oversized
im not a chub
not yet bulimic
all i need is time
a toilet that is mine
while im releasing
im not a bulimic
there is no need to judge me
its time that i seek profeesional help before it kills me...
we're still workin on it.. but if you have ne suggestions please PLEASE let us know!!
thank you
sincerley,
the next... uhhh.. really big song writer people. yeah.
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lisalion816
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::
2004 27 June :: 10.26am
:: Mood: busy
Im leaving on a jet plane, don't know when i'll be back again...
I still haven't been able to get ahold of Jon and it sucks. you think he could put some time aside to call me before i leave, but no. I mean even if hes at work, it is possible for him to call me from his cell while hes on break.
oh well i still love him.
ok, i need to finish packing the last of my stuff and make sure i have everything.
see ya in sweden
later...
glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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Rina
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::
2004 26 June :: 9.57pm
:: Mood: blank
:: Music: green day
you almost make me happy
maybe life is scary, but it’s also exhilarating. you know, it’s kinda like skydiving or something. you do it.
it scares the crap out of you and it might make you puke.
but it was probably the most fun you’ll ever have. if you’re too afraid to jump out of the plane, you might be safer, but you’ll miss out on all the fun.
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lisalion816
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::
2004 25 June :: 11.49pm
:: Mood: bored
Packing, Packing, and more....Packing...
Okay then. A little more than one day left for me here in ft. misery before I'm off to Sweden for a whole year. Reality punched me in the head today when I had to start packing. I already have one of my suitcases packed and its huge. The airline's policy is that each bag can weigh up to 51 lbs each....my single suit case was 70 lbs. Yeah...had to take some books and sweaters out and i'll fill up my other one.
Yup...im leaving for a year...won't see my friends, can't drive my car (or any car for that matter), my cat will miss me terribly and i will miss him more. Oh yeah...my cats mad at me. He knows that we are leaving, hes seen this packing stuff before and he doesn't like it one bit. Hes a nut, oh well.
...Time is like a blur now. Its like i know im leaving at a certain date and time and i know that on the day that i leave, when im sitting on the plane, it won't feel like im leaving for a year, or a month, week, or a day even. Time is a funny thing. I remember middle school, and wishing that i could just get out of high school already! Now highschool is gone, a meer memory and will be. Time goes by so fast, too fast. I know that when im in sweden, i'll get comfy with everything after a while, and then its like OH! Time to go home! Florida is waiting!
Yup, and I will think to my self,DEAR GOD WHAT HAPPEND??
...i can see it already...
I don't know how often I will update since i dunno when i'll have internet acess...i will figure out something...
....Later...
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lovethehibiscus
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::
2004 24 June :: 2.51pm
:: Mood: thinkin..
:: Music: hero - foo fighters
there goes my hero...
hm hm hm.
i was listenin to this song and i wondered who is my hero..
well actually i dont know at the moment.
but who do the kids of this generation have to look up to, other then at their parents?
who do we lucky kiddies have?
britney spears?...thats just peachy
i just dont know.
where are the neil armstrongs of this generation?
where are the respected presidents where your dad sits and reads the newspaper and he say, "that there kids, is a good president."?
where are our heroes?
in new york city?
yes i believe they are heroes, not just the nypd and fdny but all of the policemen and firefighters who put their whole lives on the line for us.
me
i think my hero is my dog clancey
who is still at the pet store just beggin for me to come and buy him.
maybe soon clancey, i will be your hero and buy you..
one day.
andie andie oxenfree***
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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::
2004 24 June :: 2.37pm
:: Mood: bouncy
i lo0ve y0ou!
Hey tatter t0t .. its Britt .. i fixed y0ur j0urnal =] .. im not done with it cuz i dont know what else you want but i hope u like it s0 far .. im tryin t0 find some more stuff t0 find if u find any drug quotes / blink quotes tell me cuz i have some really cool affects.. and tell me if u want me to change anything okie love ya s0o0o0 much <3333333
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lovethehibiscus
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::
2004 24 June :: 1.13pm
:: Mood: wondering...
:: Music: sick sad little world - incubus
it's the end of the world as we know it
you know we are all doomed when Pepto Bismol has it's own little dance.
andie andie oxenfree***
glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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::
2004 23 June :: 8.29pm
hella good mood!!
hella.. i just sed that to liz and she started flippin out.. "hella, i love that word!!" lol.. iunno i just started sayin it todaii and iunno where i got it.. hmm.. i love lil miss moore and she has an icon that says i love kayla.. and i hope she keeps it for awhile!! b/c we have a promise and we cant break it! calli. we should promise our promise!! lol. chris is **** lol. i luv ya n all the kiddies who somehow get mah journal (?????) lol
-x0
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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::
2004 23 June :: 8.20pm
:: Mood: crazy
:: Music: me singing the darkness-- "i beleive in a thing called lo0ove.."
chris is **** lol calli!! love ya babe!! and you need to f'in cALL mah ass on like sundaii!! ya heard!?
-x0
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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::
2004 23 June :: 5.25pm
I woke up this morning
shaken from a dream;
you were there,
alive,
and all the pain of the last five years
had never occurred at all;
no funeral,
no messages written on the casket,
no crying myself to sleep
every night.
my first thought of the morning
was,
what was your last thought
as your life drained from your body?-
your existence becoming a statistic,
your future claimed
by the chaos of life and
the noose around your neck.
The medical examiner claimed that
most suicide victims
instinctually
scratch and pry at the noose
in their last moments;
She found your skin beneath
your nails –
and chalked it up to
impulse,
to a natural human response
to danger:
the fight for self preservation –
for life.
I wonder
if you changed your mind
when it was too late;
if the faces of your family
and your friends
flashed in front of you;
if the beauty of life
and the strength of love
at that moment
seemed like
enough
to live for,
but apparently nooses do not ask
“are you sure?”
as they claim your
fourteen year old life.
I wonder if visions
of rainbows
danced in your mind;
sunsets over the ocean;
your wife walking down the aisle
to say "I do";
your baby being born,
his first piercing scream
awakening a part of your heart
you didn't know existed...
I wonder if you realized
you weren't ready yet,
seeing your life's potential
waiting
to be fulfilled
with the fullness of life
and the sheer
imperfect beauty of it all -
but it was
too
late?
I shake my head to clear these morbid thoughts,
far too gruesome for
such a beautiful Sunday morning.
I will continue my day
in your absence,
approaching five years
I have wandered through life
without you at my side.
Like usual,
I will see someone
with sandy hair and
turquoise eyes
in the coffee line,
and I will double check
just to make sure
it is not you.
For some reason,
hearts do not accept
the finality
of death.
then I will wonder
what you would have looked like
at nineteen,
what beautiful roads you might have
found yourself driving down,
windows open,
music up,
and free from the demons
you fatally fought with
five years ago…
how much more beauty
my life would have had,
if you had stayed.
but these are morbid thoughts
for a gorgeous Sunday in June,
so I push you from my mind
and throw the covers back
to begin one more day
without you –
five years have taught me
how to do so,
but haven’t shown me how
to forget you
or how to understand
that your bones
are becoming dust
in a coffin…
that you are now
nothing
but memories.
glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lovethehibiscus
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::
2004 23 June :: 2.24am
:: Mood: happy :D
:: Music: by the way - rhcp
the tee ideas from ydeeps & anir
(aka myslef and rina)
this is from the sleep deprived brains of ours.
in a 70s fontish thing..
Front:
Andie's Rollerdisco
-Afros Required
-Dancing Skills Optional
and it will have a picture of a roller skate on it and a disco ball
and on the back it will have a guy with an afro and 70s clothes pointing at you and the caption will read "only YOU can be the life of the party"
Front: Got Buffalo Wings?
back : a drawing of a buffalo flying away
Front: Altoids: dont let them make ya kill a man in reno for them
back: "WHERE ARE YOURE SPIRIT FINGERS DAMMIT?!?!"
there is a little picture of a girl with a stick and the caption will say "youre lucky your behind the glass wall"
a picture of a squirrel on the front, with the caption of "1-666-evil-squirrles"
picture of a frigde with the little marks that means its moving and the caption will say "tv dinner avalanche ahead coutesy of the freezer ghost"
a picture of a pinecone with the caption of "smell that cinnamon christmas. " on the back: "conspiracy?"
ALL-(noun) 1. a substance used to clean clothes. 2. an evil conspiracy-maker. 3. arch-nemisis of the green knight.
on the front is a poorly drawn picture of a girl with a frown and tears and a broken heart and it will say love is a... and on the back it will list
gift...this will be crossed out
wondorous thing...crossed out
bitch....crossed out
pain in the ass....crossed out
hassle....crossed out
salami sanwich with pickles...crossed out
4 letter word...crossed out
way of life...crossed out
battlefield
we should make a shirt that says a little dab will do ya
or have a picture of a wolf howling at the moon "the terror of our elementary"
i love dash
i love mookie
i love the SG
---------------------
well that is it for now
who knows whatever crazy psycho things may be created by us in the late night?
cause i sure dont.
Good good bye, lovely time
Good good bye, tinsel shine
Good good bye, I'll be fine
Good good bye, good good night
-jimmy eat world
andie andie oxenfree***
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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Rina
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::
2004 22 June :: 3.19pm
:: Mood: thoughtful
:: Music: the small print - muse
i'm bending the truth
Looking into oneself has become cliche, in a society where writing down your innermost thoughts for the world to read is a common occurence.
Some people take time off, others hold people at an arm's length, while others hold on tightly to whatever they can hold on to.
Because somewhere in a kitchen there could be a woman stopping the dishwasher, her yellow-gloved hands in the soapy water, gazing out the window, realising that she always wanted to be an actress but had become a mother too soon. On the other hand, there could be a spinster in a rocking chair, crying over the child she had aborted when she was young, feeling more alone than ever. And maybe, in a hospital somewhere a doctor could be holding up a newborn by its ankles, marvelling at the miracle he had just performed. Elsewhere, who knows, a college student could be cheating in an examination, to meet his parent's expectations.
As for me, I lie in bed till 2 in the morning, writing about my passions and dreams in black ink, thinking back on past experiences, present circumstances, and the mystery of the future.
Thinking of past lives, of threads and stars. Of Universes in one's palm. Of portals into the soul, of lost convictions, postcards and passports, of jumping from one mountain to another.
Self-introspection leads me into viewing my Life in some basement, a slice of dust-light from the projector beaming images, episodes, and sketches of the quilt I'm slowly stitching together.
And I watch my Life so far with a smile, bittersweet, and sometimes I laugh out loud, and cry. Most of the time I keep quiet, watching the slideshow in awe. Everything I've ever held close to my heart, I watch.
Elementary notebooks filled with summer drawings. The cresecendos and lulls of my favourite songs. My first paperback book. The sting of a palm slapping my cheek. My mother's laugh. Watching a plane take off from behind an airport window, shielding my eyes from its silver brightness.
Fingers intertwining. The taste of tears, saying goodbye at the airport. The shock of hearing about someone's cancer. Seeing a wedding. Beautiful sunsets I've collected, midnight walks. Slipping stones into my pocket.
Looking back, looking within.
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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::
2004 21 June :: 9.34pm
:: Mood: _blah_
:: Music: hands down--- dc
hey
im in ky right now. i got in yesterday. fun shit. um me n beckers got in at like 10 am yesterday.. got home. loren came over. and then kelsey and we rented feardotcom and had pics developed of me devin chris and becky at the bowling ally.. more fun shit!! lol. um diz woke up at 2 in the morning yelling at us b/c we were cheering. lol. we went outside and did builds. of course i was the frickin flyer. um. threw my backhandspring. becky is the bestest spotter in the world. kinda got my scorpion back. lol. havnt done it in like 3 years. lol. ummm then today we went to the mall and i bought $130 worth of stuff in 3 hours!!! :(.. but realli cute stuff!!!!!
n then loren kelsey becky n i went to lazarus ( a furniture place in therr kick ass mall) and we were like jumpin on the mattresses. evn more fun shit. n omg andy looks like SO different.. he walked up n talked to me and i didnt evn kno who he was at first. he looks like a dam abercrombie model!! more of them bailey!! i keep running into them. lmao. ne ways.. i just wanted to say that me n chriss pony is better then calli and mikes cow. lol. im playing girlie!! i love you. but mah pony is better. like 11 ppl sed so in your journal. lol. and that wasnt me. ne who. loren was like screaming catalyst in the mall.. screaming!! lol. and she found out that i can moon walk so she like asked random ppl if they wanted to see me. dum ass. lol. n now im in becky's room, shes in the shower. so ima go.. but ne body who wants to come to brookwood tomorrow we'll be therr. love ya kiddies (sorry andi, i stoled it) lol
-x0
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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::
2004 18 June :: 7.58pm
Breathe in for luck,
breathe in so deep,
this air is b l e s s e d,
you share with me.
This night is wild,
so calm and d-u-l-l,
these hearts they [r][a][c][e],
from self control.
Your legs are smooth,
as they graze mine,
we're doing fine,
we're doing nothing at all.
My hopes are so h~i~g~h,
that your k.i.s.s. might kill me.
So won't you kill me,
s/o/ /I/ /d/i/e/ /h/a/p/p/y.
My heart is yours to fill or b u r s t,
to break or bury,
or wear as j*e*w*e*l*e*r*y,
which ever you prefer.
The words are hushed lets not get busted;
just lay (e)(n)(t)(w)(i)(n)(e)(d) here, undiscovered.
Safe in here from all the stupid questions.
"hey did you get some?"
Man, that is so d u m b.
Stay quiet, stay near, stay close they can't hear...
so we can **get some**.
My hopes are so >>high<< that your kiss might kill me.
So won't you kill me, so I die happy.
My heart is yours to fill or burst,
to break or b u r y, or wear as j*e*w*e*l*e*r*y,
which ever you prefer.
Hands down this is the best day I can ever [r][e][m][e][m][b][e][r],
I'll always remember the sound of the stereo,
the DIM of the soft lights,
the scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers
and the time on the clock when we r-e-a-l-i-z-e-d it's so late
and this walk that we s.h.a.r.e.d. together.
The streets were wet
and the gate was locked so I jumped it,
and I l'e't' 'y'o'u' 'i'n'.
And you stood at your door with your h`a`n`d`s on my waist
and you kissed me like you meant it.
And I knew that you m-e-a-n-t it,
that you meant it,
that you meant it,
and I knew,
that you meant it,
7 |
glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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2004 18 June :: 7.11pm
omg. me and chris's pony turned gothic.. lol. and we're not sure if its a boy or a girl. her his it's name is bibbles.. if any of you are interested in taking part in paying for our pony support please call me!! ;)
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glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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lala91
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::
2004 18 June :: 5.53pm
:: Music: dc- hands down
why do so many people talk shit to get attention?to be annoying? well i hate people like that....thats all they do its like there life or something>> >I< >HATE< >HER< so0o0o0o0o much.....n her gay little friends thats all they do is talk crap bout me n try to get shit started with me n my friends or worst BOYFRIEND but i wont let that happen ill fight till the end cuz im determined.......that sounded corny but i hate it when people who talk shit doubt me.......britt knows how determined ive become these past weeks.... so im gonna fight......un till i win....but g2g im bored lol gonna go do sunthin
^^^^ callis entry
ok..
so you hate me.. and you hate my friends.. and your gonna fight??
alrighty.and another thing.. you dont like being talked about. well. >I< >HATE< >HER< so0o0o0o0o much.....n her gay little friends. that whole fucking entry is about me. and that is talking crap. and dont put in your lil journal that im the one talking. your mouth is never shut
^^^ my comment
calli then sed that she wasnt talking about me
kayla not everything is about you!!!!!!! that journal isnt for you ok!!!! i have a life....n its not all about you i dont n=know why you think it is....i dont care wut you n your friends do.....so leave me alone n stop jumping to conclusions when you dont even know the story....NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT YOU n i wasnt talking crap about that person i was stating an opinion....like i told brittany i think your sweet n pretty so why would i start stuff with you when i dont even talk to you ne more....hmmm w/e i gotta go to my life guard camp>>>> if you want ill just stop "trying" to be friends with you mk you can have wut you have always wanted....
^^^^^ callis next entry
the fact that you kinda do talk about me. and a lot of ppl tell me that.. i "jumped to the conclusion" that that entry was bout me. who else do you hate and all her gay friends.. talking crap and "stealing your boyfriend".. i thought i was the only person who was trying to do that.
^^^^ my comment
so see you are trying to screw things up with me n him....w/e
^^^ callis reply
i thought i was the only person who was trying to do that.
^^^ thats what you always say. not what i think. but you do. and i was the one telling you how much he talks about you. would i be saying things like that if i wanted to screw you guys up. if you think i can do that.. your insecure.
^^ my reply
calli, you didnt get it. you always tell me that im trying to steal chris."try to get shit started with me n my friends or worst BOYFRIEND" and since you sed that entry wasnt about me.. i asked if therr was ne one else trying to "steal" your b/f. once again.. IM NOT FUKKIN TRYING TO STEAL HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
glimpsed a bat with butterfly wings
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