_;MiMeRz`*

:: 2004 31 March :: 10.23pm

so yea today was another shit pile dropped on my life.

last night i called wade, leahs boyfriend, to get this kids number. then this morning i told her about it and she just got all mad and walked away. she thinks i was "flirting" with him.. wtf! i wouldn't do that to her or myself i just lost one bestfriend why would i push another one away? i dunno i hope this will just blow over cuz i love leah..

anyways. after school travis took me and whitneys to her house as usual and he came inside to meet her mom.. i think it went pretty well. thennn we went to the pool and laid out for a little while. then when her mom got home we went to victory lanes for dinner. i had fun, TJ was there and i stole his hat! lol

now i'm home. and tired. and lonely and depressed so i'm gunna go get ready for bed. sounds like fun eh?

:: 2004 30 March :: 8.50pm
:: Mood: =\

tired.

bored.

stressed.

aunt flows here.

i don't think me + him are gunna talk no more.. too much drama why does everything have to have drama WTF!

wtf am i gunna wear tomorrow. oh well F-it. it's 8:21 and i'm going to bed.

=X

:: 2004 29 March :: 6.52pm
:: Mood: shitty
:: Music: some country song

and i was doing so good.
wow! wanna hear some shit-- i called megan this morning to see if she could bring my black purse to school and she was like yea. so i got to school and it was in my locker so i was like cool. but then.. i opened it to put my stuff in it and it was full of pictures of me and her from like 7th grade, tickets stubs, notes all that shit. and there was a note that said "years of friendship down the drain" omg! wtf is that shit? she acts like i wanted this to happen. but excuse me i did not wish for my best friend to hate me. things havn't been the same for a really long time and honestly i can't even remember doin anything wrong to make her not wanna be my friend anymore. but i know for sure that her "new" friends are boostin her to be mean to me and thats so fucked up they were not there for her through any of the hard times like i was. so after i got her little note i wrote her a long ass letter and i tried to be as nice i could cuz i really don't want to be hateful with her but i was so heated so i'm pretty sure i said some rude stuff like "get on my level" but she does this is freekin crazy. we had all these plans for when we got older you know.. prom, college, birthdays, cars. apartments, the whole nine yards and now it seems like it's all over.. just like that. i really hope things can go back to the way it was.. i really miss it so much.

5 �3 | hAtErZ fAwL bAcK

:: 2004 28 March :: 4.18pm

my weekend ;

FRIDAY- i had school then after school travis took me + whitney and 2 of his friends to mcdonalds. then back to whitneys. we chilled for awhile then my mom came and got us and took us to wal mart lol. i got some stuff there like hairspray and . then we came back to my house so i could pick up clothes, took whitney home, then my mom dropped me off at leahs house. we got ready and went to clay's base ball game. he made a home-run "wooo hooooo" lmao. and we swang on the swings again + talked to our nigga(s). wow omg! lol we were walkin by these bikes and we made a comment bout talken them and riden them to fort myers and the owners of them were hiding and started barking at us. me + leah got so scared we thought them bitches where real lol we hit it on'm. lol that was so funny. then we went home and went to sleeeepp.

SATURDAY- we woke up and went to sun splash with her cousin nikki + her baby sara and clay. when we got there it wasn't open yet so we went and got breakfast at mickey d's then went back to sun splash. lol me and leah did the little frog lily pad things ahh too funny. then we went back to nikki's house for a little then back to leahs. we hadda baby sit clay cuz her parents were going out to eat so we just ate pizza and watched ghostship.. yea weird/scarry movie. chris and baybay wanted us to come over cuz chris just lives down the street from leah but clay was bein a brat so we didn't go. o well. but yea me and leah were up til like 2:30 talken to our nigga(s) ahh-haa! lol leah.. we are some ballerrrss.

SUNDAY- we woke up and watched TV then her mom and dad came home from church and made breakfast.. yum. then we put our bathing suits on and went an laid out and went swimmin- wow the pool was SO cold! lol. then leah drove me home and now i'm on the comp. lol whitney's on her way over now and chris and baybay might come over if they aint flaggin wit thereselves haha.

so i'll update later. bye ya'll.. =)

:: 2004 25 March :: 10.02pm

back to school.. oh joy.

i have no clothes def needa go shopping again.

i hate PEOPLE that run their mortherfucken mouth.. you know who you are and i HATE you.

i hope me + him are ok.. =\

so much shits going on.. mom your a bitch.

and megan!!! you need to get over yourself alrite. i never did anything to you besides be there through EVERYthing for the past 3 years ok. bestfriends don't just wake up one morning and decide not to be friends anymore this is fucken bogus. I was there through all the shit with your dad and your mom and bob and guys and everything... you even fucken LIVED with me ok so don't give me this bullshit.. haley and them ain't got shit on me thank you very much. but if thats wut makes you happy .. knock yourself out.

oh yea! my dad told me we were gunna go look at cars this weekend for me.. BUT! that fucken idiot decided to buy one without me. wtf is his problem i know i'm not gunna like it then wtf am i gunna do... he's so stupid he might as well put the FOR SALE sign back up.

omg me and lukes song is on the TV.. "the good stuff" aww i'm defff crying...

yea so -HE- jsut called me.. yayyy! =D and i told him wut SHE said and he was like hell naw man me + that girl do not even exchange words no more. so thats straight she could talk as much shit as she fucken wants.

tomorrows friday.. woo. i gotta make plans cuz i ain't stayen home this weekend..

bye.

:: 2004 22 March :: 9.38pm
:: Mood: hm. tired + sad..
:: Music: TV- the inferno

whoop-dee-do-bazil
saturday ;

did nothing all day.
talked on the phone and the comp.
.. thats'a bout it

sunday ;

woke up.
got a shower.
whitney came over.
packed.
luke + bubba stopped by - luke you are such an asshole fuck you. he didn't even fucken say hi to me and he was driving his girlfriends car that had pics of her and shit ya.. fucken ugly bitch. ughhhhh
that put me in a bad mood.
bubba i <3 you! =D
left for tampa.
d
r
o
v
e... blah blah blah.
got to the hotel that whitney bought online.. yea! so shitty lol it was def in the hood.
there was a fight in the parking lot between a white girl and a black gurl (which we THOUGHT was a guy)
funny stuff.
got ready.
went to the olvie garden, wow soo good.
our waiter was hott! lol
drove around.
went to walgreens to get some stuff.
went back to the room and went to bed.

monday ;

we all woke up.
got ready.
and went to Busch Gardens! yayy lol
took pictures.
had fun rode all the rides besides the water wons it was kinda cold.
OMG! a bird shit on me.. ew yuck i thought i was gunna effin puke!
whitney hadda good laugh.
then we drove home.
stopped at wendy's and now i'm hurr.
whitney's stayen the night tonight.

wow i can't believe school is tomorrow =\ ugh! but o well i get to see everyone again. wow is it wrong to scrub the first day back? o well if it is cuz i sho nuff am! i'm too tired to get all ready for school that early in the morning. so yea i'mma go holler it on to my bed and i gotta call jarvcee back.. toodles

:: 2004 19 March :: 5.48pm
:: Mood: tired..
:: Music: TV

thursday-

didn't do much hung out at my house with whitney. chris randy and baybay were gunna come over but they didn't. lol me and whitney made up a new game.. [volley ball/soccer] haha it was great we were playing it in my driveway. then later we went with my dad to the nextel place to get my phone fixed. FINALLY! then he took us to whitneys house. for dinner we made chicken parmesan.. omg soo good her mom should be a chef. lol thennn we watched tv and her mom left for like 10 min and we almost got cought ;\ butt.. shhh lol. then we ate ice cream and went to bed. but we didn't go to sleep til' like 1 or 2.. hmm

friday -

i hadda get up at 7 so whits mom could take me home b4 she went to work. got home- went straight back to bed! then at like 9 i got up and took a shower and got ready. then my gramma and cousin picked me up and we went shopping at mirrormar and the mall. i got a reebok t-shirt and mango mandarin lotion! (lol maddy) then went to visit my great gramma + grampa then i came home. and now i'm on the computer.. i think me + leah are going to the mall tomorrow to get [jersey dresses] lol wuttt! we're fixen to be fitted. ahh i like jarvcee alot.. but i havn't seen him since friday =\ eeek i'm too nervous to see him alone at my house. but i cant wait to see him at school on tuesday morning! aww yayay! welp.. i guess i'm gunna go bro..

same day diff time! lol

i got REAL bored so whitney def came over! we hadd lots'o-fun.. wink*wink then i called my baby back and said fuck it just come over. but he ride had already left =\ so he promised me tomorrow night! aww yaya! then me and whit went to go feed and let out my neighbors dog cuz they're on vaca-- def lost one!! haha so we hadda run around and catch him and he bit whitney! oopps.. but she's ok! lol then i called travis to see wut he was up to and he ended up stopping by the house and bringing us all wendy's frostys! yumm. he's such a cool kid.. great friend. thennnn! we played twisters moves.. wow! that was amazing. lol but whitney's out so i'm bout to follow.. lol peace nigga

4 �3 | hAtErZ fAwL bAcK

:: 2004 17 March :: 8.37pm
:: Mood: high

yiipeeee
i'm so confused with days! omg..

tuesday? - -
got up + ready.
went to my dads shopp to see him.
stayed there and visted for awhile.
went + picked up whitney.
mom + sis got their hair cut _ me + whitney chilled with joey and some high kid. lol cool shtuff we saw his pet "frog".
came home.
whitney hadda headache =\ .
got zooted.
went to bed.. wow.
woke up at 3- fell back alseep.

today (wed) - -
we woke up.
no headache ! =D
got ready.
went to beach.
SAT IN TRAFFIC!
laid out.
played football and volley ball with hot guys.
came home.
took showers.
got zooted!
called travis.
him + his friend darren took us to brusters.
darren.. you are one fine white boy!
but! too old.. college student.
got- a strawberry shake!
oh yea trav.. you almost killed us.
had to buy my sis a shake to keep her on hush. (not to tell mommy) lol.
now we're home and c h i l l e n .
holla back.

4 �3 | hAtErZ fAwL bAcK

:: 2004 15 March :: 8.11pm
:: Mood: crying..

welp last ngiht me and whitney stayed up til like 4! lol we watched american wedding then drumline. but i didn't stay awake for the end of drumline.. we were supposed to get up at 8 and go fishen with my dad but we deff didn't get up in time.. oops! lol we finally got outta bed at 2! ahh then we just chilled and watched TV and took showers. then we made cappuccino ices lol they were yummy! lol whitneys leavin soon so i'll be back to this later..

i fucking hate guys! for real i need to just forget about them anyways. i'm too fucken young to be worrying about love- FUCK IT!

so luke came over today with bubba. things were going good. he got here and we were all just hangin out outside by his truck. then they came inside and ate. then we all went in my room and were just sitting on my bed talking. and luke was just laying on the other side of the bed and me and bubba were sitten next to eachother and lukes all like aw you guys should hook up. WUT THE FUCK!! how is he gunna sit there and tell me to hook up with his bestfriend and it not bother him at all? thats so fucked up i love him so much and he honestly dosn't care about me. b4 he came over we were talken on the phone and he was like so if i come over can i get a kiss? so when he was here and was fixen to leave i went to kiss him and he turned his head so i could kiss his cheek and i was like wtf is that? and he said i can't and i was like why and he said cuz i'm not a single man. i was like oooo heellllll no! so i said bye to bubba and went inside and they left. then bubba called me and was like are you okay? and i was like no why the fuck does he do that shit to me. and he was like don't let him get to you thats just him. and then we were talking about chelsey and shit and i jsut started crying. i don't know wtf to do. well wait. i do know wut to fucken do. FORGET ABOUT HIM! but its just not that easy.. it's been since august since we broke up and i'm still not fucking over him.. oh my fucking god wtf's wrong with me

you know wut.. i talked to bubba and katie about this some more and i can't let this get to me. i've been living fine for a long time without him so i will get through this i am just so jealous that that used to be me. and he's the only one i've ever been in love with and got love back, i miss that so much. but i really need to wake up and get a reality check. boys=nothing! they do not make or brake you.. they are wut you make them so if you don't stress and stay focused ; you'll be all right.. i just gotta try n keep that in mind

1 �3 | hAtErZ fAwL bAcK

:: 2004 15 March :: 1.22am

hmm.. today was really boring til' about 4 then whitney came over and we waited for my momma to get hom from work. then we went to target [i got a new bathing suit and shtuff] then we went to coralwood to see 50 first dates, it was cute/funny. yea well peter murphy met us up there.. weird nite lemme tell ya. anyways now we're watchen american wedding and just chillen at my casa.. u knoo. update later bye

4 �3 | hAtErZ fAwL bAcK

:: 2004 13 March :: 7.20pm

so yea last night i went to leah's brother's baseball game.. we didn't watch much tho we were too busy swinging on the play ground :D then we rented movies that we didn't even watch cuz we pretty much came home and went to bed even tho we stayed up for like an hour doing nothing but laughing about farting.. hahaha hadda be there but that shit was tooo funny! then today we woke up at 9:15 and discovered that we left our purses in her dads truck =\ so we took showers and got ready and instead of going shopping like planned we went to the beach! that was funn.. it was such a nice day. there was alotta people there so i'm glad we wen't there i needed the sunshine. so i hadda be home by 4 cuz i was supposed to go to some country concert in naples but my uhh "friends" kinda bailed on me.. whitney's excuse is acceptable tho -- she has strept throat. but umm megan decided to make other plans and not answer her phone. isn't that nice of her?! soooo!!!!!!! i'm sitting home tongiht cuz i was def not going to a concert by myself. hmm how boring. aww but guess wut! luke stopped by my house today to see me but i wasn't home so he came in and talked to my mom- how cute! he told her he didn't have a girlfriend? last time i checked he did.. lol idk. anyways i havn't talk to vcee'ee all day maybe i'll go call him in a little bit, but for now i'm gunna go watch some tv

guys i'm back.. just wanted to update a little. it's 11:21 now and right after i wrote in here b4 i went and checked my celler and um vcee'ee called... so i called back and he was gunna come over but my mom came home earlier.. ugh! i wanted to see my beb. so anyways i spent all night talken to brooke.. i love that girl lol she went to scotts tonight i hope everything goes ok.. welp i'm outta here again.. bye

:: 2004 12 March :: 3.40pm
:: Mood: posted on the happy list
:: Music: the TV and leahs bird..

SPRING BREAK 04'
its friday!!!! the first day of sprink break!!! ahh thata doooo! lol welp i'm chillen at leahs house right now.. yepp yepp !! aw how-a-bout my baby called me 4 times yesterday!!! wow, how awesome for sarah!! eeee =] welp i'mma go chill with leah.. bye

:: 2004 11 March :: 6.58pm
:: Mood: :D cheesin
:: Music: i'm so horny (lol)

oohh wutta beautiful day!
hey guys! today was grreat!! i hit rock bottom and now i'm on my way up again! yay- but the only bad thing about that is wut goes up, must come down. but o well thats the roller coaster called l i f e !

i talked to my baby today!! alotta people were around i hope no colored folk saw us.. ahh lol! anddd! he called me after school again.. whoot !!

welp today after school me + sara stayed for math help as usual but whitney had a detention.. then we saw leah so we all walked back to whit's casa, did wut we do (lol) , then walked back to school and played madden with dontae, brandon, and justin lol they were having a compitition -- lol too funny. then leah's mom came and she left so me and whit walked back to her house and chilled.. and now i'm home kinda bored so i'mma gunna go..

:: 2004 10 March :: 7.30pm
:: Mood: better then yesterdayy ! thank god !!
:: Music: sister sister (tv)

things that make you go, hmm...
aw hey guys. last night was so shitty but i guess all's i needed was a good cry b/c today hasn't been half bad. i didn't see J (otherwise known as philly - lol) in school today but its straight cuz i looked like doo-doo lol and he called me after school. ahh, wutta doll. but i've been thinking about alotta el'shit'o to talk to him about.. i'm really hoping i get the answers i want..

anyways.. today i went with sara travis megan and kels to mcdonalds again.. i was sooo freekin scared we were gunna get caught again.. omg. aww my serr and trav are going out now!! yayy!

and leah's having a ruff time.. i'm sorry i el'love'you'o !! and everything will be a-okayy, promise cuz spring break's fixen to be off the chain! ahh lol good one.. cuz i'm FLABBERGASTED !!! lmao

welp.. i'm gunna hit it for now and wait for my baby J to hit me upp! laterrr