Uh....

:: 2006 17 March :: 12.08am

Today was busy. The Heritage opened. Ahhhh I helped Chris wait tables. Crazy crazy. Then Government.
Work went late. We went to the Gardens and it was a party for 315 people. The plates looked superb and we got major compliments. whooo! And I found out we won best caterer of w. michigan this year too (& 2003 & 2004) So that was cool.
Tomorrow I work at the Heritage so all those CC kids should stop by sometime.
Saturday Lissa and Katriana and Char and I are all going to go register! FUN STUFF. :-)

stinko

:: 2006 16 March :: 2.25pm

so . . . today was productive.
and i will still have time to do my homework when i get home from work.
stupid honors stuff.
colleges shouldn't make me work to get in . . . they should beg me to go to their college.
i should just be able to get all F's and still get scholarships.

like seriously.

:: 2006 16 March :: 12.12pm

nevermind... im not going.

you are UNbelievable.

:: 2006 16 March :: 8.56am

aww.. we went to the circus last night. it was really cool. i havent been to the circus since i was like 7, and every time it comes to town we always miss it. :) smiles..... what a wonderful night.

tonight's a rampage game. to bad im going by myself.... ahh well.

:: 2006 15 March :: 10.49pm

If you see me walking with someone else, it's not because I love him. It's because you're not brave enough to walk beside me now.
If you see me smiling, it's not because I've forgotten you. It's because I'm tired of crying for you.
If you see me living again, it's not because I wanna get back at you. It's because I want to get back what you took from me.
But most of all
If I fall in love with someone else, it's not because I wanted to.
It's because you were never there to catch me and love me back.

This is so difficult for the both of us. I know I tried so hard, there's just no hope right now. Well it's more than a shame that I lost to this game. All my walking, talking, sleeping, breathing- -
nothing will ever be the same.

:: 2006 15 March :: 9.21am

im going on a date tonight, where... im not sure. its a suprise. i was just told to get dressed up and to be ready by six. i love how that "feeling" never dies with us. how happy i am when i see you, how proud i am to call you mine, how you simply make me smile even when you're not around. we're going on 16 months now. and im just as giddy and excited to spend time with you as i was when we first started dating. and im not going to be all cheezy and melodramatic and say that you complete me, because you dont. and nobody should feel that way about somebody else. but we complement eachother so perfectly.

1 squirrel | have some nuts?

:: 2006 14 March :: 6.14pm

Isn't that awful!? This was on MSN today.
Miss Deaf Texas killed by train
"Witness says engineer sounded horn repeatedly before striking 18-year-old"

Tails

:: 2006 14 March :: 3.11pm

risk...tonight. eurasia is mine. ruby you die tonight my friend. your blood...she shall spill.

5 squirrely | have some nuts?

:: 2006 13 March :: 9.58pm

Well let's see here. The National College Fair wasn't all that bad. None of my friends even knew what it was. We honestly went just to get out of class and Mr. A told us we'd get free pens which was a lie lol. Not that I don't have enough of those anyways but out of all the colleges I was only interested in two of them which are both in California. Imagine that? I know. I sort of want to go to The Fashion Insitute of Design for fashion design obviously. I don't really know which one I'd go to. They have a school in Los Angeles, San Francisco, Orange County, and San Diego. I've would probably say Los Angeles or Orange County and then the other school is The University of San Francisco. So besides those two schools, the whole thing was a big waste of time but we missed almost the whole day so I guess I can't complain too much. I was talking to the guy that works at The Fashion Institute of Design and that is where LC from Laguna Beach goes. Haha I made sure to ask him that. He said he knows her pretty well. Well, thats nice. I'm not going to go there just because she does because I honestly could care less it's just I thought that was pretty interesting and I don't even know if I'm going to go there in the first place. It's just a small option I have. I still really really want to go to USC. I don't even know yet.
Okay so enough college talk.

I feel like my house is going to blow over any minute. That might be unfourtunate.

I can't let you go. It's who I know.

<3 Ashley

4 squirrely | have some nuts?

tonyp.

:: 2006 13 March :: 7.51pm

when i walk through parts of this house i feel like were moving out. its weird but its great because everything looks soo great in her. im glad my family stoped fighting. my mom might be able to come home from the hospital this weekend, ill probly have to leard how to give her shots which is no big deal, i dont really have a problem with needles i mean thats what i do is work with them, im supprised im not a heiroin (sp) uses.
i miss my friends.

1 squirrel | have some nuts?

Tails

:: 2006 13 March :: 5.23pm
:: Mood: bouncy
:: Music: dashboard confessional - again i go unnoticed

the end of the storm
So at the end of a storm when everything is dead and cold and wet...but it looks like the world might just be ending or just being born for the first time. thats when things start to get in your head. you think and think until it festers inside you and burns away till it slips out in the wrong form. but you try so hard to use that energy to change someone. to help give them the guidance they seek. i tried to help someone begin the deconstruction process to a better and more them, them. a real you a perfect image of what you want yourself to be. NOT ANYTHING ANYONE ELSE WANTS! but it was too much for him so he ran from it...who gives up on wanting to change themselves when someone is trying to give them the beggings to questions they must ask to begin their work? you cant change someone. you can affect them enough for them to want to change themselves. and i was doing that. even if he questioned himself once thats enough for me and i did what i set out to do. but being told it means nothing and living fake is fun...thats what makes me think about the end of a storm when it all seems like it was worth nothing...but its always worth far more than we can begin to imagine. so i did as much as i could. and i didnt push. he asked i answered his questions. everyone should deconstruct themselves. i did the end of tenth grade. you all know how much cooler and nicer and happier i was at the begging of junior year right? thats when i became the whetzel everyone seems to have fallen in love with. deconstruction did this for me. as it should for everyone. and deconstruction is different from self destruction please know that. if anyone ever wants to begin deconstruction you know where to fine me hehe. but always remember. never stop asking questions and never stop talking ever. no matter what. and dont ever lie to yourself. never. remeber this always. outy my loves.

:: 2006 12 March :: 8.45pm
:: Mood: excited
:: Music: The Veronicas-4ever

I can honestly say that today I had my doubts about all of this but after that talk I realize I don't have any reason to doubt things and that things are just the way they should be.

Come on baby we ain't gonna live 4ever, let me show you all the things that we can do, I know you wanna be together, and I wanna spend the night with you.

2 squirrely | have some nuts?

12 squirrely | have some nuts?

:: 2006 12 March :: 9.20pm

Well, I guess I can say something now!

Charlie and I are having a baby! <3

And we're really excited.

We told his mom and sister tonight, and I could not have a better family. They are so loving and wonderful, I can't believe it. I just...They are so great! :-)

I love you Charlie!

:: 2006 12 March :: 10.08am

today will be wonderful. i dont have to work, keegan doesnt have to work. its just an "us" day. i got to see him for like 3 hours last night after he got out of work before he had to go home.... and 2 1/2 of those hours we were sleeping. lol.

i started my brit lit paper last night. anybody else reading this will feel my pain. im doing mine on jack the ripper.... i almost had a break down last night about how there's no way im going to get it done in time. i mean... this week i have to write a 6-8 page research paper, a 5 minute speech, arrange everything for the talent show, work, i wont beable to get anything done on my paper on saturday because we're going to Ann Arbor for a BBoy battle. (hopefully i can use the schools camera) stupid mysterious murderer stressin me all out.

4 squirrely | have some nuts?

Tails

:: 2006 11 March :: 11.51pm
:: Music: Bright Eyes- Easy/Lucky/Free

Yeah
things are strange. waking up and staring outside, driving down the road with the window down...its like staring at an accidental gasoline rainbow, its beautiful but at the same time you cant help but question it. you know what i mean?

6 squirrely | have some nuts?

:: 2006 11 March :: 12.57pm

Lisa and I are procrastinators and we figured since Spring Break is coming up we should probably buy our tickets to Florida so that's what we did today and the total for both of us was $1,000. Yeah, that's what happens when you wait so long. We should have gotten them a long time ago but I always wait until the last minute to do everything. Oh well I guess. $1,000 later and we're off to Florida soon. Thank god. We both need to get out of this horriable place.

:: 2006 10 March :: 11.01pm
:: Mood: Happy
:: Music: Motion City Soundtrack-My Favorite Accident

I really hate calls like those. Calls when you can't even understand your friend because they are crying so hard. I don't even know what to say to make her feel better. It's hard for me to imagine being that upset because I haven't been that way in a long time and right now I'm genuinely happy. I feel so useless because some of my friends really need me and yes I am here for them it's just I can't always help them in the ways they need to be helped. It really makes me sad to see her like that because I can honestly say that less than a month ago I was the same way. It's hard. It hurts. I know. I've been there and I'm sure I will be again someday. I never believed that something great would come along and make me forget about all those things that were bringing me down but eventually it does and you just need to learn to let go of the people who cause pain. It's not worth being down. I've learned that the hard way. I have no idea how talking about my friend turned into something like this but I just hope that things start to look up for some people who really need it and they know who they are.

This morning when I pulled into school Bruce was already parked and he waited for me and we walked into school together and he told me that he feels like today was going to be a good day and I just had a feeling it wasn't going to be and sure enough it really wasn't. I was such a bitch to everyone for no reason. I was just so upset that I could've cried. I have no idea why I was upset but it was just one of those days but I think I really just needed to talk to this person and after we talked and everything was better. So I apologize for being that way today.

Mishy: I'm pretty sad because those wonderful sunglasses that you bought for me have been stolen by Aaron. He was wearing them after school and he told me he'd give them back tomorrow. He has like ten things of mine at his house haha.

I guess this is all for tonight. I'm just rambling on.

<3 Ashley

4 squirrely | have some nuts?

tonyp.

:: 2006 10 March :: 1.07pm

for those who care my mother is out of i.c.u. im soo happy shes out. hopefully next week shell come home. gona start cleaning the house for her and were gona need help so if anyone cares to help movie alot and alot of old toys and broken junk let me know. my down stairs family room is huge but theres alot of junk lying around but once its cleaned i get to turn half of the shop into a tattoo shop which is awsome cause theres a slider door and the half id be getting is pretty big so i could have small get togthers in there whenever i wanted. so if anyone is willing to help my family her and there would be awsome.
god i need to sleep.

1 squirrel | have some nuts?

:: 2006 10 March :: 10.57am

242 days
and
17 days
and
12 1/2 hours
and
I love you :-)