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:: 2004 2 August :: 6.00 pm

I was in a good mood.. should've known it wouldn't last. There's nothing to hold it.

..im not crazy im just a little unwell..
..i know, right now you cant tell..
..but stay a while and maybe then you'll see..
..a different side of me..
..im not crazy im just a little impaired..
..i know right now you dont care..
..but soon enough you're gonna think of me..
..and how I used to be..


...and there went that.
Trying gains me nothing more than problems.

2 Blank's | Shoot Me


:: 2004 30 July :: 10.00 pm

[:.Abandoned Pools :: Start Over.:]

What a mess our lives turned out to be
It was at its best when you and I were only three
We can start with .all the things. that turn us out
And we can go right down the list and throw them out
..
Can we start over?
It's over.
..
Here you are and there's where you wanna be
But don't think you don't have company
Think of all the lonely people in the world
And if it's God who made us why are we so damn cruel
..
Can we start over?
It's all over.
..
We can never lie
And you can never steal the time
And we can only watch them die
And we can never find out why
..
We can start with .all the things. that turn us out
And we can go right down the list and throw them out
..
Can we start over?
It's over.

Shoot Me


:: 2004 16 July :: 12.00 am
:: Music: Cold - Sick of Man

I can not win.
No matter what direction I turn, no matter how hard I try.. I always fucking fail. Atleast in some people's eyes. I've tried for too long.. only dug myself deeper into fucking nothing.

Maybe I should just go back to how I used to be.. not even knowing anything is fucking going on. Yes? I don't know.

I'm left searching for anything stable enough for me to hold onto... just long enough to gain back any feeling.. any at all.

..i said dont go away..
..turned off the lights and then you..
..said please dont follow me..

3 Blank's | Shoot Me


:: 2004 15 July :: 12.00 am

[:.Finch :: Once Upon My Nightstand.:]

I'm sleeping to give my head a rest
I am so sick of these arguments
Alone, once again I'm on my own
Just need some time to myself or I'll explode

I know that this is all my fault
And one day I will get it right
But for now I sit here and remind myself
That everything will be okay

Your letter written on a napkin
It sits on my nightstand
And it reads:
This is...
This is the last time

That I will write to you
This is goodbye

I know that this is all my fault
And one day I will get it right
But for now I sit here and remind myself
That everything will be okay

1 Blank | Shoot Me


:: 2004 9 July :: 10.30 pm
:: Music: Seether - Out of my way

I wish I never would have started caring again.

Because you know what, fuck everything I cared about.

Fuck trying to fix things, fuck you.

No, maybe my life isn't as bad as yours but, you know what.. I don't fucking care. Maybe I'm not as strong as you.. or maybe you don't know all you believe you fucking do.

..give it up, im doing this my way..


If some of you care.. im sorry if i let you down.. im sure i will.. alot.

6 Blank's | Shoot Me

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