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:: 2003 14 December :: 12.55 pm
:: Mood: indifferent

Fuel - Wont Back Down

I know what darkness means
(and the void you learned from me)
The isolation steams
(So I think it wants to bleed)
The echoes in my brain
(All the things you said to me)
You took my everything
Now I'm coming for you!

I won't back down
I will not bow
I've come to bring you hell
I can’t forget
Things you did
I've come to bring you hell

The shadows that you see
(In the places that you sleep)
Are memories of me
(Better pray your soul to keep)
The truth behind your eyes
(You know the thing you never see)
Your darkest little lies
I'm coming for you!

All the scars that never heal
All the wounds that will not seal
I will not forget the day
These memories never fall

Shoot Me


:: 2003 14 December :: 12.45 pm
:: Mood: frustrated
:: Music: Switchfoot

More than fine...
When I wake in the morning,
I want to blow into pieces.
I want more than just ok, more than just ok.
When I'm up with the sunrise
I want more than just blue skies.
I want more than just ok, more than just ok.

I'm not giving up, giving up, not giving up now.
I'm not giving up, giving up, not backing down.

More than fine, more than bent on getting by.
More than fine, more than just ok.

When I'm wet with the sunshine.
I want more than just a good time.
I want more than just ok, more than just ok.

I'm not giving up, giving up, not giving up now.
I'm not giving up, giving up, not selling out.

More than fine, more than bent on getting by.
More than fine, more than just ok.
More than fine, more than bent on getting by.
More than fine, more than just ok.

Shoot Me


:: 2003 13 December :: 9.25 pm
:: Mood: self-injuring
:: Music: Staind - Mudshovel

Im sorry...
God damn it... Im sorry... for asuming things... and asking questions.. fuck... I need to learn to not say anything, everything just gets fucking ruined...

Maybe it is better if no one knows me and I know no one else... then everything wouldnt get fucked up...

I dont mean to be rude, or nosy, I just wish I could help, the best of intentions with the worst of outcomes... EVERY FUCKING TIME... yeah.. I am shutting my fucking mouth now...

2 Blank's | Shoot Me


:: 2003 13 December :: 6.44 pm
:: Mood: stressed
:: Music: Simple Plan - Perfect

Seether - Out of my way

I can’t pass up this opportunity to make myself absurd,
I can’t pass up this opportunity to make myself be heard.
Would you, like to, be the one who sees me lose this all,
Would you, like to, be the one who sees me fall.

You like to think the worst is over now, but you cant breathe at all
You like to think you’re owed a favor now, man you’ve seen it all

Did you, want to, be the one who pushed me off the wall,
Did you, want to, be the one who let me fall.


Shoot Me


:: 2003 13 December :: 6.20 pm
:: Mood: melancholy
:: Music: Switchfoot - Meant to live

Im going under... falling forever...
Im unsure what to write about... and I'm sure you dont care.

I want to get my lip pierced... possible? No..

hey dad look at me, think back and talk to me, did I grow up according to plan?


psh... fuck you, "DAD" is thats what your title is supposed to be to me...

I am slowly pulling away from everyone that expects me to be someone im not... I am glad, until they "sit me down, for a talk"... the whole "Now, Amber..." thing with a long speech about how they think we should be close...

Fuck You... I dont want to be close to you.. you are all fucking failures living a fake life... and that, now is what I am doing... Grow up with no one knowing... live with no one knowing... the truth..

No.. I..*sigh* will just stay with my few friends, my darkness, and my anti-social life... It accually... halfway works... Its fairly simple.. everyone involved in it, I believe, I can trust.. and I can be...myself without hiding.

So fuck all you want me to be... because you are who made me not want what you want. I want nothing to do with you, or anything related. Not one god damn thing.

Fuck it! I see you in me
Fuck it! I feel you in me
Fuck it! I’ll heal you in me
You’re out of luck - can’t get a piece of me
It’s all blown up. Don’t even fuck with me.
I cannot please you all forever
I cannot please you at all

1 Blank | Shoot Me

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