Now it's Wednesday, and I still cannot drive, as I failed my test...What's done is done, can't change that, I'll just have to miss the cones next time...I went home sick on Tuesday during 3rd period, I believe I was way too stressed...Carmen came and visited me after school, and we hung out for the rest of the night...same as tonight, somewhat...Carmen is a good friend, I'm glad that she is my friend...and turns out that some people didn't even notice that I was missing in some of my classes, which makes me feel loved...*tear*...I seem to be knowing more of the stuff in Quiz Bowl, which is grand, and cool...yeah...I really should be getting to bed, but eh, not much going on in school tomorrow...

Also, a thank you to everyone who has visited me at work...you can be assured that once you work and once I drive, that I will visit you...

Quote of the day:
" have no time for Time Magazine or Rolling Stone.
I have no wish for wishing wells or wishing bones.
I have no house in the country I have no motor car.
And if you think I'm joking, then I'm just a one-line joker in a public bar.
And it seems there's no-body left for tennis; and I'm a one-band-man.
And I want no Top Twenty funeral or a hundred grand."

Fun times...
Today started up with the end of my walk with Carmen, which is always a good time...Who knew I could talk to someone for 3 hours? or even 4? Yeah, after that I went to work (after I slept a little...) at 11, and worked until 2, where Britt picked me up and we grabbed lunch at Hunan and studied for AS...After that, we just hung around, she took me to pick up some vinyls that Mr. Zusik gave to me...yeah, her, Sara and I spent practically the whole day together...first time that either of them had been in my house for more than just picking me up...we went to her aunt's surprise party, as I was under the impression that there was cake, but there wasn't...cake or no cake, it was fun there, I guess...yeah, and then we tried to crash Stram's party, and that didnt work, so we went to Baldwin's to watch a movie...and that is my day...

Quote of the day:
"The memories that now rests in this forest
Forever shadowing the sunrise of my heart"

And I have no idea why...I just seem to have this great feeling of despair wallowing in the bottom of my stomach, like something isn't right, and conciously I do not know what this thing is...Well, on the good side of things, I'm going to get my driver's license sooner than the 23rd, a week sooner...now hopefully I will pass it first try and no longer be a burden to anyone...School seems to be going okay...nothing too bad...I'm looking forward to Homecoming, and it's always fun to make new friends, or strengthen aquaitenceships into friendships...

Ever wonder what would happen if you got in a car accident and you scattered your shit?

Quote of the day:
"In the evening, the day is done"

Well, I had driver's ed tonight, and I passed the written test with a 94%, so I'm close to my license, really really close...Quiz bowl tryouts are this Thursday, so I have something to do...I'm really close to my license!!! Work wasn't too strenuous today, actually pretty easy, as I just worked an hour and a half...but the bad thing is that the books are building up...and that means more work for me, because I am the only one shelving picture books and non-fiction books...so it is more effecient for me to work all the time rather than getting backed up...

I'm going to Homecoming this year, with Carmen, which will be a great time...second dance ever, eh?

Quote of the day
"With frozen hands I rode with the stars"

Visiting Doug at work is cool, kiddos...come in and get a free conversation with the one and only...yeah, at work today, Carmen stopped by, which was nice...when friends stop by, it makes work better, makes my day better...It was really foggy today, which made for an experience for getting to school...I found out that my auditions for being a sympho is the 25th, which gives me a while before that, even though I haven't got my music yet...I wanna beat out Dan this year, and I hope it is just Dan and I in symph, coz we work very well when it's just us two...the rest of school is pretty much blah, except for AS, which is pretty entertaining and fun, even though it is a lot of work...tomorrow, and Wednesday and Thursday, I will be in driver's ed, and then I will be able to drive soon...yay!!!!!!!!!!then I get to visit people at work...YAY!!!!!!!

Quote of the day:
"I laugh under the weeping moon"

You know what I really hate? Kids...haha...I mean, no, but they aren't my favorite...I spent too much time today with kids, showing them how to fold paper...so fun...especially on minimal sleep, like 2-3 hours...that's what I get for taking a 3 hour walk last night with Carmen...yeah, which was fun, we just talked a lot about stuff, made me glad that she's my friend, talking is good...before that, we were at teh Baldwin's, watching a shit pile instead of a movie...not the greatest movie, I forgot how bad it was when I saw it in theaters...I ended up getting a bloody nose from Sara, coz she likes pounding on my face...we just kind of chilled and watched the dog Fornicate Under Carnal Knowledge it's bunny friend...yeah...an enjoyable time was had...

Quote of the day:
"Sleep while the sweet sorrow wakes my daydream
Sleep while you think of me with kindness, please remember former days"

Chris is sweet...
and by sweet I mean random, like randomly coming to visit me at work today...it's been a long time since I've seen Chris, like, the end of last year, because I haven't ventured over to his humble abode recently...work was cool today, well, maybe not cool, but not so tiring and boring...I got done what usually takes me two hours in less than one hour!!! I am progressing at this job, which is good...These interviews I need to finish up...three, by tomorrow...at least I've got them all planned out...one is my uncle who lives in Charlotte, he is going to call me around 8:30...he works with the immigration sevice, so he might have good views on the American Dream...I am also going to interview my father and hopefully joshie, if he ever calls me...maybe I'll just interview my sister, sometime...school is alright, but French seems to dumbing up again...Atleast Coomes and Ian are in the class, and Lauren Gwark and Amanda Dever and some other cool people...yeah...chemestry is VERY easy, so easy...very very easy...it makes me cry, and yearn for a challenge...hopefully it touhgens up, or I'm going to have to whine to Britt...yeah...bet she can't wait...or maybe, I could whine to Megan or Sara also, bet they'd enjoy that muchly...

Quote of the day:
"...prepared in innocence to meet our king of glory
and so we have this
you have it in your secret windows
and you're understanding to understand it and to bring it forth
it takes minute detail
it takes a holy life
it takes emotions
it takes dedication
it takes dedication
it takes a death
and only god can allow it
and you couldn't do it if you're not the seed of god
and so the path through the great corridors
these are corridors unto his perfection
that is which the prophet and the oarman summoned has penetrated
that through this great sea of blackness
that i penetrated through these corridors
and i went through that last segment
where i went through these dark serpentines
i passed through that corridor
where they sat
where they are
and when you penetrate to the most high god
you will believe you are mad
you will believe you've gone insane
but i tell you if you follow the secret window
and you die to the ego nature
you will penetrate this darkness
oh yes there's many a man or woman
that's been put in the insane asylum
when this has happened to them
and they're sitting there today, people think they're insane
but they saw something that's real
and they see it when they're on drugs
the only thing is they see it
not through the light of god, and the way i show you
i show you to see it through the light of god
and the understanding of god
because when you see the face of god you will die
and there will be nothing left of you
except the god-man, the god-woman
the heavenly man, the heavenly woman
the heavenly child
there will be terror under this day of night
there will be a song of jubilee waiting for your king
there will be nothing you will be looking for in this world
except for your god
this is all a dream
a dream in death

and so i went through that window
and the tower of hell and the great serpentines of the highest order
and i went through that when i showed you"

Music Boxes...
I've been working everyday after school, and I can say it feels good to have a few days off...Today and tomorrow with no work, and all play (hopefully...) Football game on Friday was fun, and one of the tubas quit, and for that, I am glad, because I did not like him as it is...Saturday night, I went and saw Northfork with coomes, and I'd have to say that it was a fucking weird movie, but a good one also...We watched Stairway to Heaven which was also good...we then played the joyous conception that is Soul Calibur 2 for the rest of the night, and far into the morning also...I stayed there till 4, and then came home and went to a party at the Codding's...I had a Brat and a hotdog, and lots of other food too...It gave me bad indegestion/stomach ache, and ended up making me take a B.M. at Stevies...speaking of which, it was an okay time...wish we could do that every night, it's fun to hang around with friends and just be lazy oafs...we watched TMNT3, and the end of LOTR part 1...played some *ahem*truthordare*ahem* and just sat around and were lazy...so freaking lazy...just because a cactus isn't sharp doesn't mean it doesn't stick into you...

Quote of the day:
"Rain is pouring down my (now) shivering shoulders
In the rain my tears are forever lost"

You never know what's going on nowadays do you? I called the other day to set up my damn driving test, but I need to complete driver's ed before I can set this up...I seriously regret waiting so long for my liscense...hopefully I can get it before the end of September, so I can...hmm...I've been working this week, 3 hours after school...it's going fine...today, Emily walked into the library and said hi to me, which was cool...I also saw Sarahp out of the window and power armed her...it was good...indeed...power arming things are good...that is sort of my calling card now, or whatever, trademark pose...yes...whenever I see her in the hallways, I power arm it up...yes...

School is alright, kind of boring and drab starting off...American Studies has been fun...yes...I think...French hasn't...Sara gave me a ride home today...maybe I should apologize, because I was being lazy...

Quote of the day:
"Curse of the Legions of Death"

wonderful quote, eh?

Hmm...first football game, and they lost...I've been working for three days now, and it's going pretty smooth...my swelling has gone down, but the area turned dark purple, which probably isn't the best thing to have happening...I have some medecine now, to help the swelling go down and to color to return to normal...hopefully it works and nothing else goes wrong...tonight we had a birthday party for Stevie, and it was fun...we kind of just sat around and talked...had cookie-cake, drank pop, etc...

Don't you just hate it when you like someone, and you are afraid to ask them out? Or more likely you are hindered by not being able to drive, and are afraid that...

Quote of the day:
"She rose, screaming at closed doors.
Seductive faint mist forging
through the cracks in the wall.
I shant resist.
In tears for all of eternity."



...after all you might have a slight chance?

swell with joy (or bee babies)
Hmm. Wednesday, and I'm already updating...what?

Band has been quite dumb recently, making me all sweaty and all...yesterday, I mowed the lawn, and got stung by a be right above the ankle while doing so...well, there were no effects of it on Tuesday, but today it started to swell a whole lot...it is all red and puffy, and etremely warm...yeah...hopefully it doesn't get too bad...

Today I played some band football, and made two touchdowns, one for about 100 yards...I'm the biggest guy out there, so I just plow through everybody...it was fun...

Today in band, we had a water balloon toss, where the furthest group apart wins...I was with Stevie, and we didn't do too well...Britt even beat us! Haha...

Quote of the day:
"I am the Lizard King
I can do anything"

Well, the weekend was fun...Saturday, I finished up my driving time with the instructor, and then I hung around with Xiao the whole day...I also hung out with Coomes, James, Eric, Alex, and more!!! It was quite enjoyable...Well, today, I went and saw "Open Range" with Brendan and his father...it was quite good...we had ribs for dinner, along with corn on the cob...we played Liars Dice after that, which is fun...yeah...I had a good weekend...

Quote of the day:
"Beware my eyes'll find you
And see into your heart
And if you hold the evil
I'll rip you all apart"

Why does everything fucking suck? Ever wonder why/how something you would consider a "great friendship" could deteriorate within half a year, to the point where the person can't even stand to be around you? I find it highly depressing...do you ever get that feeling that maybe you should piss everybody off, and then you wouldn't ever have to worry about what the fuck they think, because you no longer give a flying fuck about them and their demon spawn? Just let them go and never think of them again, and be better off that way? Why, oh why, do I get so fricking depressed? Why cannot I find eternal elation? Not even eternal elation, but someting to the extent of lasting happiness, not something that comes and goes, coming very rarely?

I purchased Donnie Darko today, which is one of the greatest movies that exists on this earth...hmm, what else has happened...my aunt has had her surgery, and is in the ICU, but seems to be doing very well...all that fucking smoking she did is coming back to bite her in the ass isn't it? I wouldn't call it irony, but I don't really call it...I've been looking for a damn Opeth cd for awhile now and it seems as if I shall never find it...oh well...I'm going, piss off...

Quote of the day:
"Oh how I love you
The pain won't go away
Oh when I need you
You're always so far away"