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insomniac
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2006 22 October :: 11.22am
maybe i'm doing this journal thing again?
...
all the cool kids are doing it...
11, 12 days?
can meyouwe evfsdkj
i need. to stop thinking some stupid things. but it sucks to be always waiting.
lack of speaking
leads to thinking.
and how almost everything i do reminds me of othergirl who's involved.
i think a huge creature was just outside my window.
i'm using a new facewash just recently, it turns my face icy if i leave it on, and makes me think of snow and winter. i miss winter chill. even if it's always been lonely, i fell in love in(with) winter chill.
why should i be vague here, or even here at all? my thoughts aren't presented in a bow. they're fucked here.
so they are perfect. just like you. fucked and perfect.
god damn it.
i dont know what tabbs looks like. not at all.
you promised we'd talk today. but you just fell asleep.
even little things, when will you start keeping your promises?
this journal is probably pointless.
yeah. wuteva.
I love you exponentially.
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 9 December :: 3.43pm
:: Mood: touched
Lucky. Lucky. Lucky!
Last night Lucky invited me to go to the band holiday concert with her. We sat in the back and after a while she held out for my hand since two nights ago we acidentally fingerlocked when she was trying to blindly touch me while talking to an old lady. Lucky smells good.
She held my hand in both of hers over her lap, running her fingers over mine. I interact a little but for the most part I'm not sure of what to do. Then later her hand somehow come over to my side and I put to use what she had said earlier to her friend [her fingertips are very sensitive]. She's so into it that her arm's shaking and she's trying to keep a straight face, which amuses me.
-lucky leans over- are you laughing?
oh? no. -smile- Are you shivering?
..no.
This goes on for a while, and I found it sort of uncomfortable to be sunk down in my chair, staring at the stage and concentrating on her hand. So I sit up a bit a look down to her hand more. They responded so easily, especially when I ran my finger down her sleeve a little, then up to the tips of her fingers and back over, barely touching her. Once in a while she leans her head down on my shoulder, and asks if I minded if she kissed my cheek. I must have seemed insensive, because I just said it was 'alright'. Oh my gosh, her lips were so soft and just a little moist. So lovely. The hand menstrations continue and once again lucky kisses my cheek. Near the end of the concert she rests her head on my shoulder, then brushes her noise against my shoulder and neck. It drives me wild. I squeeze her hand a little and she moves away, then back again. Her nose moves against my cheek and I turn my head towards her's. I kinda can't see straight and my cheeks and other parts are extremely hot.
We were so close to kissing, but I can't make first moves. But if someone gets the momentum going I can dig it. I believe I'm blushing just thinking about last night. A friend of her's, Patrick, was sitting next to her, and he kept touching her leg or messing with her another way. She looked torn and chanted 'keep your mind on the girls.. no nazis' She's so silly.
I haven't gotten a chance to see/speak to her since last night, good thing it's Friday.
Lucky has a girlfriend and a tool. Then there's me, whatever I am.
I leaked at school today and had to get a change from home. I ended up staying home. School gets out in a few minutes.
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 21 March :: 6.11pm
:: Music: Sleeping In - Postal Service
My Sesame Street calendar says that yesterday was Big Bird's birthday, I can't believe I missed the festivities!
So a few days ago I ordered these three shirts that were on sale at threadless.com, JC Was A Streaker, He Lives By The Ocean and God Hates Techo. They're so neat, I can't wait until they come in.
So on Saturday I saw outside for a long time, drawing and doing my algebra homework while I listened to music, which I do with about everything I do. So, while I was sitting there for an hour or more, my left shoulder ends up getting burned badly along with my right shoulder. And this large patch on my upper left thigh also got burned that looks odd since it has a sharp burn line, then fades back to white after about six inches. Hopefully it won't peel and get nasty since I've been putting Solarcaine on it every few hours. Good stuff.
Today, in Ms Blanco's class, we had to write a five paragraph narrative using the fifteen rudimentery vocabulary words that she makes up copy the deffinition of. So Hope, Mogn, DJ and I were going to be in a group, but she says that it's three to a group even though all of the desks are moved into groups of four. So she moves DJ. Ididoth. Anyway, our story ends up being about this crazy guy named Morgan who goes into fruit-rehab because he stole some diced peaches from this five year old on a field trip. Then he breaks out and assimilates a rag-tag group of 'ittle tykes to cause anarchy and whatnot. Then the D-O-L-E Dole corperate boss-man gets mad at the rioters and chaos ensues. But Morgan starts this, like, fruit company comparable to Willy Wonka's. But Mr. Green Giant doesn't like that, but Morgan hands out golden foil fruit cups and everything ends in a warm and squishy way.
Ben, Rachel and Travis' group did something about a Lolli-pop king named Shelby. Ha.
I plan on finishing Mossflower before Sunday is over with. I mean, if I had the time it could be finished in a day or two.. but everyone knows ima hypocrite.
No school on Friday, which means that's the beginning of meh spring break. Which I will make sure to get off of my ass and do stuff. Gramma said she might take me on an online shopping spree, since I find the Duval stores pretty redundant and repulsive.
"...And his fruit cravings are sensationalized!"- Mogn
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 15 March :: 7.16pm
:: Mood: ehh
:: Music: Tiny Vessels - DCFC
Last Friday was a half-day, I walked towards my mum's shop with Hope, DJ and Mogn. DJ parted after a block since his house is there, then Mogn followed Hope and I into my mum's store. After a few minutes she said good-bye and continued forth to her grandma's.
Oh. and we frolic-d.
Then Hope and I got some sodas because we were thirsty [aren't we clever?] then blazed the trail towards Hope's house. We passed a dirty Mexican on the way who eye-raped us and a half-drunk man wanting the number for a cab.
This isn't the quaint little town you see in the postcards.
When we finally made it to Hope's aparment building [she was exsausted] we sat by the pool and dunked our feet in and slammed our hands down on the surface like the fools we are. Then Hope retrieved some toy dolphin and orca water pistols from her room and we played around and had loads of fun. We couldn't find the large-headed, steak-eating fluff kittens that Hope was telling be about before, but a good time was still had.
Then we went to her house and played Kakio Drum Master for like an hour or something and watched a little bit of the first episode of Arested Development.
Scott's younger brother Nick and his girlfriend Ashley stayed for the pior week and they were great. So that Friday night was their last day here so we all, including Hope, went to Benihana. The food was alright as usual, but Hope was fuming the whole time. Apparently Japanese salads are not made with Romain lettuce. And the jokes they make there are ignorant and insulting even to me, a totally non-Japanese person.
The fried rice was made right and we ate our ice cream with our chopsticks [omigee, i totally forgot the japanese word for it! >< sorry!] , for those who wished to know.
I have a new computer wallpaper, it's real pretty.
I deleted my PSP7 since Hope got me a copy of her like fotoshop-something. But I haven't gotten to install it yet, so the new layout that I'm inspired to create will have to wait.
And while she stayed at my house we pretty much just played DDR, Katamari Damacy and complained about how much my computer fucking blows.
She might give me one of her's, since she has like five sitting in her room. <33333333
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 10 March :: 8.53pm
:: Music: VH1's 100 Most Wanted Bodies
stole from someone
Oy, you all better fill this out and reply! D:<
What Would You Do If:
< I died from natural causes:
< I said I liked you:
< I kissed you:
< I lived next door to you:
< I started smoking:
< I stole something:
< I was hospitalized:
< I ran away from home:
< I got into a fight and you weren't there:
What Do You Think About My:
< Personality:
< Eyes:
< Hair:
< Family:
Would You:
< Be my friend?:
< Keep a secret if I told you one?:
< Hold my hand?:
< Take a bullet for me?:
< Keep in touch?:
< Try and solve my problems?:
< Love me?:
< Date me?:
Have You Ever
< Lied to make me feel better?:
< Wanted to kiss me?:
< Wanted to kill me?:
< Broke my heart?:
< Kept something important from me?:
< Thought I was unbearably annoying?:
And More:
< Who are you?
< Are we friends?
< When and how did we meet?
< Describe me in one word.
< What was your first impression?
< Do you still think that way about me now?
< What reminds you of me?
< If you could give me anything what would it be?
< How well do you know me?
< When's the last time you saw me?
< Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
< Are you gonna put this on yours to see what I say about you?
1 said that we will never part |
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 8 March :: 7.08pm
:: Mood: stuffed nose
:: Music: Franz Ferdinand
stole this from an aneis
[ Name: ] Shelby
[ Birthday: ] April eighteenth, ninteen-ninty one
[ Location: ] Florida
[ School/Mascot/Colors: ] burgandy\red, white, gold [at the HS]
[ Zodiac Sign: ] Aries
[ Shoe Size: ] eight [girl sandal] fiveish [boy shoe]
[ Pets: ] Brownie <3
[ Siblings: ] none
[ Eye color: ] lightish brown
[ Hair color: ] brown
[ Grade: ] ninth in a few months
[ Hobbies: ] drawing, DDR, writing
[ Nicknames: ] Shelbow, Perry
[ sports? ] nope
[ Where were you born? ] Key West
[Are you a night or a morning person? ] it depends
[ Are you ticklish? ] yes
[ Do you believe in God? ] nope
PERSONAL -- >
[ What do you want to be when you grow up? ] not a mathmaticion
[ What comes first in your life? ] truthfully, i'm not too sure
[ Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/crush? ] i do believe i have a crush
[ What are you most scared of? ] dying or lonelyness
[ If you had an extra set of eyes were would you put them? ] just above my knees
[ What do you usually think about before you go to bed? ] my friends, funny things that happened during the day
FRIENDS -- >
[ Who's your funniest friend? ] Hope or DJ
[ Who makes you laugh most? ] this is redundant
[ Who do you E-mail most? ] um. Ambar
[ Who's your meanest friend? ] i don't have mean friends
[ Who's the loudest? ] Lauren! <3
[ Who's the shyest? ] Bianca
[ Who's the smartest? ] DJ
[ Who's the wildest? ] haha, everyone's wild!
[ Who's your best friend? ] one? damn it.. um.. in KW, Hope
[ Who do you go for relationship advice? ] Mogn
[ Who knows all your secrets? ] no one >>;;
[ Who's the prettiest? ] they're all pretty
[ Who's the most honest? ] Mogn or Kaya, maybe Lauren
FAVOURITES -- >
[ Movie: ] Napoleon Dynamite
[ Song: ] "Experimental Film" They Might Be Giants
[ Sport: ] does marching band count? x3
[ Vacation Spot: ] some place nice and cold
[ Ice Cream Flavor: ] Cherry Garcia
[ Candy: ] swinkles [it's like for the poor man's crack]
[ Class: ] gifted
[ Holiday: ] Xmas
[ Day of the Week: ] Wednesday
[ Color: ] Cerulean
[ Magazine: ] i never read magazines
DONE IN THE PAST 24 HOURS -- >
[ Had a serious talk? ] no
[ Hugged someone? ] yeah
[ Cried? ] no
[ Laughed? ] yeeeeah
[ Made someone laugh? ] yes siree
[ Bought something? ] um, a cookie?
[ Cut your hair? ] nope
[ Felt stupid? ] just a little
[ Talked to someone you love? ] mnhmn
HAVE YOU EVER --
[ Done drugs? ] no
[ Eaten an entire box of oreos? ] nope
[ Watched Punky Brewster? ] once, i believe
[ Hiked a mountain? ] no
[ Stayed home on Saturday night, just because? ] yeah
[ Been in love? ] maybe
[ Seen the White house? ] on the telle
[ Seen the Eiffel tower? ] no
[ Tried smoking? ] in my dreams, and it sucked
[ Drank alcohol? ] no
[ Smoked marijuana? ] no
[ Played monopoly? ] for four freakin' hours
[ Seen Titanic? ] i've never seen the end
[ Kissed someone? ] sure
[ French kissed someone? ] no
[ Tried a weight loss program? ] no
[ Jumped on a trampoline? ] yes
[ Visited another country? ] on a cruise once, that was a terrible week
[ Colored in a coloring book? ] mnnhm!
[ Had a bubble bath? ] not in forever
[ Been on a plane? ] yeah
[ Been on a boat? ] yes
[Been on a train? ] yep
[ Been in a car accident? ] a few fender benders in slow-motion
[ Ridden an elephant? ] heck yes!
[ Made a web page? ] yeah, in like sixth grade.. bad idea
[ Played with Barbies? ] mnhmn
[ Stayed up all night? ] yep
[ Broken a bone? ] nope
[ Watched Jerry Springer? ] yes, and my IQ payed dearly
[ Gotten in trouble for talking in class? ] yeah
[ Been to a hospital? ] yep
[ Lied? ] on occasion
[ Been arrested? ] no
[ Fallen asleep in class? ] yeah
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 2 March :: 8.21pm
:: Music: E Eat's Everything - They Might Be Giants
idioth
Put an X in the ( ) for the ones that apply to you:
(x) snuck out of the house?
(x) gotten lost in your city?
(x) saw a shooting star?
(x) been to any other countries besides the united states?
( ) had a serious surgery?
(x) gone out in public in your pajamas?
( ) kissed a stranger?
(x) hugged a stranger?
( ) been in a fist fight?
( ) been arrested?
( ) done drugs?
( ) had alcohol?
(x) laughed and had milk/coke come out of your nose?
(x) pushed all the buttons on an elevator?
(x) made out in an elevator?
(x) swore at your parents?
( ) kicked a guy where it hurts?
(-) been in love?
( ) been close to love?
(x) been to a casino?
( ) been skydiving?
( ) broken a bone?
( ) been high?
(x) given someone a bruise?
( ) skinny-dipped?
( ) skipped school?
( ) flashed someone?
( ) had oral surgery?
(x) saw a therapist?
( ) done the splits?
( ) played spin the bottle?
( ) gotten stitches?
( ) drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?
(x) bitten someone?
( ) been to Niagara Falls?
( ) gotten the chicken pox?
( ) kissed a member of the opposite sex?
(-) kissed a member of the same sex?
( ) crashed into a friend's car?
( ) been to Japan?
(x) ridden in a taxi?
(x) been dumped?
( ) shoplifted?
( ) been fired?
( ) ever had a crush on someone of the same sex?
( ) had feelings for someone who didnt have them back?
( ) stole something from your job?
( ) gone on a blind date?
( ) had a crush on a teacher?
( ) celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans?
( ) been to Europe?
( ) slept with a co-worker?
( ) been married?
( ) gotten divorced?
( ) had children?
( ) saw someone die?
( ) been to Africa?
( ) Driven over 400 miles in one day?
( ) Been to Canada?
( ) Been to Mexico?
(x) Been on a plane?
( ) Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show?
( ) Thrown up in a bar?
( ) Purposely set a part of myself on fire?
(x) Eaten Sushi?
( ) Been snowboarding?
( ) Met someone in person from the internet
( ) Been to a moto cross show?
(-) had real feelings for someone you knew only online?
( ) taken partially nude/nude photos of yourself?
( ) been in an abusive relationship?
( ) lost a child?
( ) gone to college?
( ) graduated college?
( ) done hard drugs?
( ) tried killing yourself?
( ) taken painkillers? (in a "Im in complete physical pain" sort of way)
(x) love someone or miss someone right now
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 28 February :: 9.01pm
:: Mood: content
:: Music: Country House - Blur
stole this from brownsugar
If I were...
if i were a month, i'd be: December
if i were a day of the week i'd be: Wednesday
if i were a time of day, i'd be: Twlight
if i were a planet, i'd be: Neptune
if i were an animal, i'd be: a liger
if i were a direction, i'd be: north-east
if i were a piece of furniture, i'd be: an old, comfy armchair
if i were a historical figure, i'd be: Rosa Parks
if i were a liquid, i'd be: Mercury
if i were a tree, i'd be: a Fransy-Pansy
if i were a bird, i'd be: a Peacock
if i were a tool, i'd be: a Blowtorch
if i were a flower/plant, i'd be: a Desert Rose
if i were a kind of weather, i'd be: The kind of day when the clouds and sky form rich mixes of pearly-whites, blues and grays; and a light shower comes and goes during the cool afternoon.
if i were a mythical creature, i'd be: an Unicorn
if i were a musical instrument, i'd be: a piano
if i were a color, i'd be: Cerulean
if i were an emotion, i'd be: innocent bliss
if i were a vegetable, i'd be: Lettuce
if i were a sound, i'd be: a whistle
if i were an element, i'd be: Potastium
if i were a car, i'd be: a Shelby GT.. pearlized foam green with light pearlized orange racing stripes
if i were a song, i'd be: "Experimental Film" -They Might Be Giants
if i were a movie, i'd be: The Fox And The Hound
if i were a place, i'd be: London
if i were a play, i'd be: Peter Pan
if i were a show, i'd be: Boondocks [coming later this year]
if i were a material, i'd be: Courdoroy
if i were a taste, i'd be: Cherries
if i were a scent, i'd be: Strawberries and Vanilla
if i were a word, i'd be: Gesticulations
if i were an object, i'd be: a pair of spiffy sunglasses
if i were a body part, i'd be: slender hands
if i were a subject in school, i'd be: reading
if i were a shape, i'd be: a triangular prism
if i were a number, i'd be: 15
if i were an article of clothing, i'd be: a long scarf
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 25 February :: 10.46pm
:: Music: freakishly humored
Old School and Anchorman are funny-ass-movies. You can trust that.
"You're like a miniture Budda, covered in hair"
Anyway, I don'y feel like recaping my Orlando weekend once again, as fun as it was.. So I'll just say that Friday at 12:30 in the morning we started on the coach bus, then around eight o'clock I got a coffee and some hash browns at a rest stop. Then around tenish we arrived at Seaworld and I stayed with my group [Lauren, Ben, Travis, DJ, Matt] until three-thirty and then we went to The Florida Mall until nine. I got two Napoleon Dynamite shirts, a pair of sunglasses, two fancy headbands, some earings, candy, a pale pink\brown broach and a neat reversible tan and green purse.
I roomed with Gina, Bianca, Bryana and Audrey then in the morning we went to Islands of Adventure. Had loads of fun there, then Sunday we went to Universal Studios. I bought a really over-priced camera there, but it was worth it for the neato pictures that I'll post soon.
Then Amber is visiting this week until Sunday, so we've been going to the movies. We've seen Hitch, Constantine, Old School and now we're watching Anchorman. Oh yeah, and like half of Garden State that we'll be finishing tomorrow. I saw Robot Chicken last night, it was okay, but not as funny as I thought it would be.. That might be because I had like null sleep and a little stressed.
Oh well.. Back to the six o'clock news!
and you will always have my heart
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insomniac
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2005 22 February :: 11.25pm
Wow, have I had a fantabulous weekend or what?
I've already told like thirty people, but not yet my journal! Oo
So, after school, Grandma wisked me away to get my hair cut, which looks simply adorable!! It's a little choppy, but my hair gets this nice little natural curl near the ends.. and I have bangs now! Nice, long bangs.
Gah.. I've been dilly-dallying for a long time.. Time for some sleep now.. I'll speak of the rest of my weekend tomorrow.
"Gansters copy their fashions from gay guys. All of them do it." Me
and you will always have my heart
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