Summary of my Eventful Day
Getting back into the watch-some-anime mood, I thought I might as well watch Jubei Chan the Ninja Girl, Secret of the Lovely Eyepatch, episodes 5-10. I still have two episodes left to watch which I will continue shortly after this post. I'm trying to hurry this summary along since my brother will be coming home in about fifteen to twenty minutes, and I want to be watching anime by then to make him think I am a lazy bum who does nothing.. which is normally true, except for today.

So, I watched the aforementioned episodes and kept interrupting myself in the process. I washed the dishes, which took about thirty minutes, cleaned the kitchen table, and did my laundry. I am currently air-drying my clothes right now. I'm also washing a blanket which was on the floor and I spilled iced tea on, so hopefully I can get that somewhat clean before my mother gets home and bitches. I doubt I'll be able to get that dry in the next hour though. I also briefly cleaned the bathroom sink because it's a huge mess. Briefly as in: I put a few items away and wiped the basin where it shown through. There's a corner I neglected because it's just a huge ass mess. Hmm, then I cleaned my room a little and vacuumed it. And then I cleaned my brother's room for reasons unknown, just seemed like a fun thing to do at the time. I removed the spare clothes hangers from my closet as well to make my closet look nice. Odd, because my closet is more organized than my room.. oh well. Like feet. I pay attention to my feet, maybe more than others. I cleaned my feet and filed the toenails and decided to take a shower in the end, instead of just washing my feet. So this was earlier in the day, like 11am, and just so happened that the one hour of the day I decide to take a shower my father calls three times and leaves messages for each. Messages like, "I know you're home. Pick up the phone.. please. Call me back.. please. I want how the turtle's condition is." Just jumbled stuff, but he sounded kind of upset that I didn't pick up the phone. I called him back and said I was in the bathroom. (That's one thing about me, I don't want people to know I've done work around the house sometimes. So I'll spend hours cleaning something up and never mention it, and chances are it goes unnoticed. And when I take showers, it's usually at a time when no one is home, so they never know I take showers really. I don't know, I'm weird.) So now, most likely, my father will think I took a fifteen minute shit or something, because I called him a while after he initially called. I take long showers, so what. French vanilla body wash.. mmmm..

I guess I smell like a Frenchie, ahahaha. I don't know. I wonder why it's called French vanilla. And, if there were a wine or cheese fragrance for body wash would it be politically incorrect to call it Frenchie's Wash? I really don't know what's going on in my head. Well, time to add the liquid softener to the blanket, hopefully it's still in the rinsing process. Oh yea, tonight is pizza night too. Pizza..

Lack of Sleep is an Antidepressant --- Cho Hakkai fights with Sesshomaru!
I just woke up half an hour ago and realized I was home alone. Everyone left fifteen minutes prior but I'm not a deep sleeper and should have heard them exit the premises, so that came off as Mystery #1 for September 25th. May it be solved, later. I only slept for four hours though, which was a great and welcoming surprise and I feel very rested, somehow. (Yea, I went to bed at four in the morning.. I finished watching the first DVD of Saiyuki my second time. Great anime.) So, in the past two days I've had nine hours of sleep. I'm feeling just awesome. For the last week and a half I was sleeping for eleven to fourteen hours a day, so it's great to be out of the depression pothole. My compulsive eating has lessened as well, so I'm just all around very good this morning.

However, I did wake up and had the not-so-sudden realization that, "I've been drawing anime for four years now, I should be drawing awesome shit." I'm having the longest artist's block in personal history and it's bugging me. I excel at faces and, as I would like to think, coloring, but I used to draw more full body shots than faces so that I'm lacking in the body area is one of my larger challenges in art. But I'm surprisingly in the mood to draw right now, probably Saiyuki inspired, so I'll doodle a little after this post.

Oh yea. Speaking of Saiyuki.. I took an online quiz months ago titled 'Which Saiyuki character are you most like?' and if you're familiar with the series, I ended up with Cho Hakkai. I love all the characters, pretty much equally, so I didn't mind getting him. But, no doubt, remembering that played a role in my dream last night. Which, in it, Hakkai was fighting with Sesshomaru, from InuYasha, and he had six shikon jewel shards in one of his arms. He landed a few punches on Sesshomaru, who was showing off his calm and laidback dodging skills. Then, for some reason (probably MUD inspired), Hakkai had 600 max hit points and had to get this mauve-reddish robed girl, who reminded me of Sesshomaru's little servant Rin, to eat fruits from a tree which gradually gave him back hit points. She was eating those green New York apples, which would taste so delicious right about now, and had some very anime looking cherries that looked to be bursting with flavor. An interesting dream but no one lays a hand on Sesshomaru GODAMNIT.

Birthdays Come and Birthdays Go
Since writing the prior entry and later updating the journal, I just noticed the front page news. Andy's birthday is October 5th. No shit? That just reminded me of my father's birthday. How stupid I have been, I would have forgotten it had I not read that birthday note. I just can't believe I wasn't counting down the days weeks in advance, or even acknowledging it. I feel completely guilty, but I would have felt much worse if that day came and I still forgot it. My father bottles up so much pain and stress and I realized earlier today (yesterday, I'm carrying the day over again) that when he starts his day in a bad mood, everyone is bogged down by it. He's usually the jubilant force behind the family and it hurts everyone at least a little when he's not feeling well. My family owes him that much to make his Day a great day, a memorable day, a special day. Every year he always tells us not to buy him anything. When we don't, we can tell how sad he is inside, but he won't admit it. It's sad. His birthday is typically a sad day.

At least once every day he tells us that he loves us. Of course he always says, "Love you buh bye." kind of fast, as if it were one word. He started saying he loved us about three years or so ago. Before then it was just said in his actions, I suppose. Our family is just that way, we really don't say the phrase. My dad ends phone calls these days with the aforementioned phrase, and it hurts me every time, but it hurts him more. No one says it back to him except for my oldest sister, mainly because she's just the only amiable sibling. And it's not that I hate my parents, I do love them, I can't help but love the ones who raised me and provided food and shelter for me. Everyone can't help but love their parent(s) for the food and shelter, but it's those small actions and events along the way that make saying I love you very hard for me. The last time I said that was to my father, two years ago, outside the front doors to my old school. He said his little quick phrase and without even thinking of it I just repeated, "Love you bye". At the end of the day he picked me up and we arrived home in a matter of minutes. And before I closed the car door I paused and looked back at him to ask, "Did I say I love you this morning?" he said yes with a smile without even thinking of the answer, like he had given it much thought or placed it in a 'good memories' section of his mind. I didn't mean to make it sound like he played a trick on me to make me say that, but I made like a sideways grin and went, "Hmm."

Love is such a strong word, I'm sorry I can't share that phrase where it means most.
I'm sorry I can't share it at all.

Renaissance Festival
Yes, I went to the aforementioned Renaissance Festival last Sunday. The ride came three hours late but that was actually a good thing. Since midnight exactly, on Saturday/Sunday, my brother and I were discussing how much it will suck to go to the fest without costumes, especially since the people we were going with were going to dress up. We decided to scour the basement for old material in which we could create snazzy costumes out of. After much searching, we eventually found nice thick grey material (great for cloaks) and some red, light blue, black semi-waterproof, and extremely soft white material in varying types like cotton and nylon.

For my costume, I wanted a simple square-neck light blue shirt with a black flared skirt. Using the same material for the skirt, I wanted to create a black cloak with a hood (it being semi-waterproof would be excellent since the weather wasn't dry, even though the material wasn't very in-theme..) and possibly tie the shirt with a belt or leftover cloth which I could braid. It sounded like a great idea, especially since my brother and I talked about our costume ideas for about two hours before we agreed to make them. In the end, I spent three hours hand-sewing the shirt.. I sewed everything I could pretty much. The neckline, ends of the very short sleeves, the sides to hold the shirt together, and the bottom of the shirt. At six in the morning when my mom woke up, she walked into the room we were sewing in and of course was mad. There were sheets of cloth layering the floor and thread here and there. After about a minute fumbling with the television, she looked at me (she was mad at me the previous day, so I tried to ignore her at first) and to my surprise she said gently, "What are you trying to sew?" Her tone caught me off guard. She once held a sewing job at Unitog for many years, so any compliment she had about the hand-sewn shirt I made would have thrilled me. I just never expect her to have any interest in anything I would ever do. So I picked up the mess and went to my room to finish the shirt. Later on, I would show her the shirt I made and I felt damn proud of it. She loved it. She really seemed like she was proud of me, and that was great.

I never finished the skirt or cloak. I never dressed up for the fest afterall.

My brother, on the other hand, made his costume in time even though he slept hours before 9am, when we were supposed to leave. He loathes sewing, and hasn't sewn in so long he claimed to have forgotten, so I said I'd sew his shirt when I finished mine. I finished at 7:30 am though, and had expected to mow the lawn by then. Before he slept he finished his cloak though. Ever seen the anime Rurouni Kenshin? It plays on Toonami. Well, there's a group of 'villians' in that anime called the Jipon Squad (the spelling might be off..). My brother designed his cloak after theirs. He did very, very minimal sewing for the cloak, that I re-taught him how to do, the rest he held together with safety clips.. He also added two olive green sheets, folded in halves, on top of his cloak. The sheets were actually his room curtains, so one side had rook-like squares sewed onto the curtain that the metal holder went through. It first looked ridiculous, but hours into the fest the costume actually looked more Medieval-ish. It's a shame no pictures were taken. Maybe I'll draw a picture of his costume so you know what I'm talking about. But I suppose the costume was so good, or maybe so weird, that when he stood around waiting for me and one other (we told him to wait there for a few minutes while we looked for someone else) people came up to him and asked if he was getting paid to look like a statue.

Someone that came with us spent over $100, eighty of that into two hats. He has the hugest hat fetish. I swear he spent at least one hour in the same shop, moving in a five foot radius. Men. My brother spent $20 on a wooden katana. That was just a hellish price, a wooden sword!! I wouldn't have paid $10 for that! But he liked it.. and that's all that matters. My sister spent $13.50 on a pewter dragon figurine for her boyfriend, and I ended up only paying $8 for two pewter wizards, which was very cheap in my opinion. I initially only wanted to buy one, then I heard it was only four dollars per. I had to get another. The shopkeeper was extremely nice as well and commented on people asking him about painting the figurines and when he asked to see the outcome of the paint jobs, the people never again showed up. So I intend to return next week, with two painted figurines. I joked with my sister about trying to resell them to him for the same price. Heh. I don't know, but I have one figure in the garage still drying from the grey primer I sprayed on it earlier. I'll paint it tomorrow with model paints and spray a coat of sealer on it. Maybe, just maybe, I can borrow a digital camera and take pictures of it. That definitely won't go into my Elfwood gallery though.. if only I made the figure.. which the shopkeeper makes by the way. He carves out the molds! The figurines in his store have amazing details. The ones I bought are about three inches in height, and the eyes about one or two millimeters, but you can see the iris and pupils. Just amazing handiwork. And using pewter would bring in such an incredible profit, I considered learning how to carve the molds and cast magnificent little figures. I have some patience..

Some of the staff workers commented on my sister's Egyptian whore dress, which I thought was pretty cool. My other sister's friend sews costumes, and she sewed the two my sisters we wearing. They were of professional quality, better than most of the fest crew's getups.

It would lightly rain every so often at the fest, which I actually appreciated. I have allergies and the rain kept it at bay. I also took four allergy/sinus pills within a seven hour span, only two were supposed to be taken every twelve hours, so I was a little drowsy..

So much fun though. I'm never used to hothothot looking guys noticing me, but I saw a few at the fair that did. I don't know if my hair was messed up from the rain or if they looked at me to see how I would react. I don't know.. I can have very low self-esteem though, so I don't credit the glances and stares to my looks. I know if I dressed up next week that I would receive possibly twice as many glances, and I swear I have some bad anxiety problems in my head, but it'll be fun. I might even receive less stares because I would 'fit in'. Either way, I think I would have much more fun dressed in theme.

So.. you read all this? Sheesh. Hopefully I will go next week, if my sister has enough money. She still has to pay off things and all. There's tons of things I wanted to add to this post but it's long right now I know. I even went through and cut out large sections, as I always do with these entries, so you wouldn't be too bored. Well, over and out!

Renaissance Festival and Books
I read Andy's comment on the front page about the chat feature and thought, "Oh yea. I saw that but I never got around to looking at it." So I'm in there now, in another window of course, and there are four others on. But it seems that they're mainly just asking for journal help, not really chatting. Poor Andy. I really like the slanted scrollbar though, kudos.

Ok. No one is chatting with me. Assholes.

Recently I've added two more books onto the growing list of "Books I started but have yet to finish". These two books are, 10,000 Dreams Interpreted by Pamela Ball and The Art of Blacksmithing by Alex W. Bealer. I am borrowing the latter from a 'connection' of mine. That is, to say, I don't know the person well. I started another book last night but was so distracted that I managed to read only twenty pages in an hour. I'll try to finish that one sometime, if my brother doesn't return it to the school library. It's another book on dreams, dealing with the Readings of Edgar Cayce.

I need to work on smoother transitions.. Stepping back into the aforementioned books, I don't know if 10,000 Dreams Interpreted is a good buy. For roughly $11.00 you get text like, "To dream of stealing suggests we are taking something without permission." to "To be on stage in a dream is to be making oneself visible." to even more obvious bunkum such as, "Using a telescope in a dream suggests taking a closer look at something." No shit. Oh well, it wasn't my money.

Haha, I just wrote a review on that book at buy.com. My review will be posted within five business days. Sucks to be Pamela Ball.

Let's see now.. come Sunday I'm going to the Renaissance Festival with siblings. I'm excited about that, especially because I'm not paying. The downside of this trip is that I don't have a costume. My oldest sister handed an Egyptian whore costume to my other sister, to which she asked, "What do Egyptian whores have to do with the Renaissance Festival?" My oldest sister replied, "Nothing! But it looks good." A typical response coming from her. So once again, I'm going to the Renaissance without a costume. I swear one day I will find something themely to wear. I was actually looking for a nice dress online and saw one titled Midnight Priestess Robe, which looks decent. The robe is $46.00 but it ships within 48 hours and that's just not fast enough. Some day I swear I'm also going to work at least one year at the Renaissance Festival. I don't care how much it pays, it looks awesome. Of course it would help if I lived near Kansas City, in which I don't, and in which I don't particularly plan to. Maybe there's a cheap motel nearby where I can stay at for the seven weeks. Or I could drive up there, work two days, drive back down, and continue this for the seven weeks. Heh. Hopefully the pay would cover the gas/lodging costs. I doubt it.

I'm going to call it a night.

Alas, Depression Leaves Me Not
Today I watched Picture Perfect, Who's Line is it Anyway?, X-men, The Family Guy, five minutes of Futurama, talked with my brother for the next twenty-five minutes about dreams then watched InuYasha, Trigun, and Cowboy Bebop. Consecutively. Maybe you don't know me very well; I don't normally watch a lot of television. I am so depressed.

Downward Spiral to my Soul
Lately I have read numerous sources, on a variety of topics, but in the end they all point towards a common theme: Death. I watched a program on TLC several hours earlier, where surgeries were being practiced and the majority of the first-shown patients were surprisingly not surviving. This struck me as uncommon for, as much surgeries I have seen on the television, usually the patient lives and it's just another happy and utterly triumphant story to tell the younger generations. I am not often slightly surprised at new visual content these days but, for the days that I am, it's a wonderful and greatly pleasurable experience. Oftentimes I find these hospital stories mildly saddening. But, for the most part, I find them as one of the very few genuinely entertaining stories. You may think of me as cruel, sadistic, unpleasant, and rude, just because I feel this way. I will agree on the sadistic part but, in almost a subliminal way, I resent the rest. I truly find death to be one of the most fascinating topics.

This otherworldly fascination led me to believe that it has played a part in the way that I live. For example, the way that I dress. I do not consider myself trendy, in that I don't 'keep up' on current styles or trends, but the way I portray myself is above average on the mental list of what's important to me. I dress in dark colors and I am sure my interest in death has inspired this. Another great interest, depression, has also inspired the 'goth' look I'm sure.

Death and depression have always had a place in my life. The first time I saw a corpse I could not have been more than five. I can never forget that moment, it was so surreal and calming in a sense. I appreciate being given the opportunity to experience that moment at such a young age because it taught me something that many people will never learn, or ever truly accept. Without a doubt, it has altered the way I am today.

I am fortunate that I did not experience depression at that age because I am glad to have had some sort of childhood. Most of the memories tend to be bad but, if I sat down and actually thought about it, I know the good days carved and shaped my personality.

Earlier, in Middle School, I have had a different outlook on life. Things I once enjoyed and fully participated in I no longer found interest in. I started to wear more darker colors and less 'revealing' clothes. (No more shorts, I already stopped wearing skirts way before then, and larger tee shirts. Not the typical 'revealing' clothes you may think of, but I didn't say 'skanky'.) For a few years I wore my hair up, meticulously tied back, but I started to wear it down more and sometimes left uncombed. My grades dropped from A's to B's to eventually F's, in a span of roughly five years. All of this seemed to have gone unnoticed by family and ex-friends, even by school counselors. It took my senior year, and the accumulated troubles with the school system, to finally attract the smallest form of attention that I know I should have received from the start. It's not that I wanted to be depressed, it's just that I couldn't let my heart heal. I finally had one counselor talk with me, but only for five minutes, while I was in the process of serving an hour and thirty minutes worth of punishment. She asked me a few questions which seemed to her to be of great importance at the time. Questions such as, "Are you depressed?", "Do you hurt yourself?", and other such questions that I don't feel like sharing right now. The answers I gave her seemed to have hit a wall and she stared quite blankly at me. I was disappointed that she didn't have answers to my problems, but even moreso when she never spoke to me again. From what I told her I thought maybe she could help somehow, indirectly if anything, but she didn't.

Black Olives
When it comes to food, I'm not a very complicated person. I take the simple things to eat, like canned foods or snacks. Tonight it's going to be a can of black olives, thus the clever title, and I intend to eat them all. The last time I did that I felt rather sick in the end. Black olives taste great but too much of such greatness never is a good thing. So tonight I thought I'd eat them with a little splash of Italian dressing. I remember last time I counted 39 black olives (it could have been an even 40, I don't know) so I'm counting again in curiosity that they are canned by numbers. I'm on 21 so far..

Now why did I count 55.. I may have been a few numbers off, but that's much more than 39 or 40. Damn it all. Another theory gone bad.

A Good Day
I was having one of those slow days, pretty much all day, today. I'm feeling under the weather, unproductive, sick, worthless, unhealthy, useless, more sick, shallow, and really sick. So sick right now I'm actually going to visit the bathroom.

Errr, five minutes later I'm back here trying to summarize the time elapsed since my last entry. I can feel right now that that is not the last time this hour that I will visit the bathroom. Damn sickness, I'll be back.. again..

I'll try to keep my complaints to a minimum tonight. It feels like every time I'm reminded of my health status I feel worse. If you could hear me now, as I type this, you'd probably feel bad for me. Unless you're an insensitive bastard who has an 'FTW' bumper sticker and finds pain all too common but would rather not be bothered to avoid it. In that case, I wonder why I haven't met a person like you, come visit me.

It's been a few days since I've been online, but one thing I've learned since is that life's expectations are too high for me. There are so many great opportunities placed before me that any idiot could land a solid lecture, asking why in the hell have I not already raised a finger for one of these opportunities. I thought it was just smashing to hear a company was hiring for over $9.50 starting out. Then I thought it was even more incredible that another place, an hour closer, is hiring for either $11 or $12 starting out, doing much less work. So I'm in a situation now where I can easily find a job, but I haven't shown much interest in either. Of course there is one major factor I haven't mentioned in the jobs, and not to mention my health again, but that can play a key factor in getting the second job. I am getting no income right now and the people I am surrounded by are already in college. So it's a very shitty feeling that I'm getting right now. I want to start college, but unlike my peers, I want to pay for it with my own money. I'm also heavily considering taking one of those "at home" courses, not online. It would yet be even better to attend college and take one, or more, of these at home courses. I strongly feel that I am up to it. I am waiting right now until next autumn to start college. I have no plans inbetween now and then but, as I've always done, I will see what happens when it happens.

Every year, up until this year, I have had a strong desire to further my experience in art through a college course. Right now I don't feel like that's what I want to do. I just can't understand how taking an art course will help me draw better. I have heard everything when it comes to tips and advice and, quite frankly, it does not make the slightest impact on my drawing. On a typical scale from one to ten, ten being the best, I honestly consider myself a six when it comes to drawing, maybe even a seven but that's pushing it. I'm not just relating this scale to anime either. I've grown up on realism so my anime style is heavily influenced on aiming for an extent in realism. And I honestly feel that I am better at still life than I am at anime. I'm actually confident that I am better at drawing still life than anime, and if you can think of that the way that I do, you will agree that that is pretty damn lame. Many people have told me that I am one of the most creative people they've ever known, but they're not even hitting the actual truth there. Lately I've felt completely uninspired to do anything, even drawing. I will sit down for hours, originally fueled by a strong desire to draw something, but never actually do. I have an artist's block, writer's block, and any other block in the world right now when it comes to expressing myself. I feel so worthless right now.

On a brighter side, I checked my emails today and saw one from Spaceforhope about an InuYasha Quiz. I have taken one before, but this one gave me a much better result. I am Sesshomaru! One of the lines in the result read, "You are calm and collected and you don't show any emotion at all." Thank you, quiz. If people can't recognize this as a positive quality, then I'm glad you can. Thank you, quiz. That's exactly how I feel inside. I can even agree with the line after that.. but you'll have to take the quiz and find it out yourself. I am extremely pleased to get emails like this.

Speaking of emails, I need to start that art trade.. Right now I'm on Smiley Central, mainly because all of the other sites I've been on today are bombarding me with ads for this site (dictionary.com, msn.com, and even quizillia.com.. I think). I'm just not the type to download at all, so if you've downloaded these 1,000+ smileys, for who knows what reason, let me know if you thought it was worth it.

Before I finish up this jumbled entry, I wanted to post my result from a quiz I just took online. I'm the Seer, out of Aesthete, Sadist, Masochist, Idol, Exhibitionist, and Protector. I was somewhat surprised to see sadist on the list, because I was sure if sadist was involved with any quiz results that I would get it. Not to sound like a badass, but I really can relate in saying I'm a sadist. But oh well, I can agree with being a seer, too.

Take Advantage of Me
I have the "most comfortable" bed in this house. Not too long ago I let my mother sleep in it, several times, and same goes for my brother. Tonight he will be sleeping in my bed yet again. That wouldn't bother me so much if I didn't feel taken advantage of, but I just woke up an hour ago to watch Inuyasha (my brother wakes me up just to watch it) and I had about five hours of sleep. That's all the sleep I've had in two days and everyone thinks I don't need anymore, so they steal my bed. I'm a perfectionist, sort of a hypochondriac, somewhat of an obsessive-compulsive, but now I have insomniac under my belt. Not to bitch too hard, but my whole family, save for me, is overweight. That's why I have the best bed, because I haven't yet fucked up the frame. My brother is getting a new bed because the mattress made a 'u'. I really don't want my bed to be that fucked up, but after so many nights of everyone else sleeping on it, it's slowly getting there. It pisses me off. I can't say I'm the cleanest person in the world either, but it sickens me to think what odors everyone else is leaving behind. My mother slept in her panties on my bed and when I found that out I was repulsed and tried so hard to hide it. She didn't even know it bothered me until my brother mentioned it. Then she sat me down and tried to have a "mother to daughter" talk about how sorry she was, but not before putting in a lot of, "What's wrong with you?" comments. Everything! Ok?

I'm a freak when it comes to skin as well. I wash my face whenever it feels dirty. This is probably slightly related to OCD. But I hate when people use my pillow as well because no one else has a 'nice' face in my family. I know that's harsh. My mother washes her face a bit, puts expensive lotions and shit on it, but she sleeps with her mouth open and I swear she's drooling on my pillow. My brother on the other hand does NOT make the slightest attempt to clean his face. It's disgusting. And now it's on my pillow.

Ok, that's enough of that. I wrote a poem last night that I spent two hours thinking about. It's about my life, and I kind of liked it. I enjoy writing poetry.. maybe someday I'll put something up.

I used to keep a diary at Diaryland but something happened and I deleted all of the entries. I kept a few of the ones I liked, it's still on my computer, so maybe on the days where I'm too lazy to write I'll copy/paste something from the collection. Laziness. I actually liked those entries more than any I've ever written elsewhere. I don't goof off, hardly waste time, and get straight to the point. I joke less too, which I know can be more interesting to read at times.

Going to check my spam-filled emails now.

Editing and Schtuff
I keep writing numerous paragraphs, only to find myself later deleting them. It's such a waste of my wasteful time.

So, today when I woke up, I showed my brother the one-inch cut on my left arm. I told him that last night I was trying to be quiet while getting a drink, so he wouldn't wake up, and in the darkness I ran into the newly-placed sharp-edged shelf. He grinned and pointed to three cuts on his left forearm. Apparently the shelf has already claimed two victims in a 24-hour time frame.

I'm going to watch Family Guy now. I don't particularly like the show but the television set has now been temporarily placed in the same room as this computer. I can't really concentrate either way, oh well.

I just heard my mother tell me she's going to shampoo my carpet tomorrow night. I can just feel a heavy sigh creeping up. It took months for me to have enough motivation to move all the crap from my floor, and on my bed, to my closet and one corner of my room. It's such a mess. Most of it consists of piles upon piles of multi-colored paper. I draw a lot, write a lot, and record a lot. I really don't want to disturb whatever's growing in there. Man, oh man.

A Bumbling Bee Bustling with Beaucoup Benevolence
My, my, this has to be the first time ever I've been so excited to write more in this journal. In any journal for that matter.

Welll.. I edited the previous post a wee bit, phew.. what was I thinking to write the stuff I wrote. I am currently sifting through the Woohu Forums and reading anything I can. I checked the calendar last night and noticed how many birthdays there are in this month and I wanted to draw them each a little birthday gift. Just so happens to be a birthday today though! That crept up fast, I must've missed it last night. So I wished her a happy birthday and we sent a few messages back and forth. I was able to help her with some HTML too! That was pretty self-rewarding. I'm a huge fan of HTML and that I was able to help someone out, however small, was pretty exciting. Tonight I feel like a cloak of sadness has been lifted, I'm not usually smiling so much. Am I just too easily amused?

Hodgepodge
Inuyasha just started (the 'Your Time' isn't right but I'm too lazy to change it) and it's a brand spanking new episode. I want to see more Koga. Koga kicked ass. Not just because he had two shikon jewel shards and one synthetic Naraku-made jewel. He's badass. I'm envious of Shippo's artistic abilities also, that's some wicked drawings. Shippo's cute. I was working on a pixel icon that I spent about two hours into, never finished, but it looked nice. Ok, break time, watching Inuyasha. They're all babbling about Naraku..

Awww Miroko finally met a lady, who wasn't a praying mantis and wasn't hideously ugly, to bear his child! It's so sweet. Sango seems jealous. Right, anyway, you probably don't care or already know this.

I stopped by Something Awful's Forums today after receiving an email notification of a private message. It read, "I miss you." No doubt that's the default message that roughly translates to, "You've had an account here for two months and have not posted one message!" So I posted something. Weird stuff there. Inuyasha..

Hmm.. I want to see Sesshomaru. Uh.. my brother just said, "Stupid slut. You probably have an itchy crotch and.. poor teeth! There's no health plan for prostitutes." How lovely. All because I accidentally hit his Beyblades.

Life of a Freelance Artist
I'm pretty damn tired. I swear this will be the last entry until I get some sleep.

I just emailed someone with my character information. I'm doing my second art trade, oh joy. Maybe when I'm less tired I'll think it's a grand occasion, but the main problem with art trades seems to be my lack of characters. Everyone has fully developed characters with an elaborate story, with a balanced amount of males and females. Here I have short stories, semi-developed characters (most without names) and 80% of them are male. Somehow I just find male characters more interesting than female characters, though that could be due to the fact that males are very mysterious beings. ;) And it's incredibly strange, but starting out I could not draw males with the smallest fraction of success, now males are mainly what I draw. I kind of draw feminine guys, that or androgynous characters. Oh well. I have plenty of fantasy stories though with characters already sketched out, and some with just text descriptions at the moment. As I mentioned on the Woohu Forums earlier, I'd like to place a story or two here with illustrations. I just have some art requests and offers to catch up to right now before I can get that project started.

Oh yea, I made an account at WoohuLyrics too now and put some PM5K songs up. I'll put the rest up if I remember next time. It's hard to transfer their lyrics from their jumbled form to a coherent one. Spider, leader singer of PM5K, changed some words around, omitted words, added plenty of words, and even omitted/added new lines. So I just put up a compromised true lyrics/singing lyrics on the website. Hopefully no diehard PM5K fans will complain too much. I'll try to add more artists and their songs up there, mainly artists I have CDs for, so they don't get left out in the ever-increasing world of lyrics.

Woohuligans
I've been reading countless Woohuligan journals since my last post. I thought I would find at least one good entry, but was I ever fooled. To save you the trouble of random looking, the journals were either pink-plastered or full of complaints. I hope my journal never falls into the hands of mediocrity.

So I started to look up random Woohuligan profiles (I like that word..) and noticed the 'Interests' section, for most of the users, were filled with celebrity names. Are celebrities, who are in fact human, so interesting? I have a mental list of some of the greatest celebrities -- with natural born talent, stunning appearances, or both -- but I don't post them anywhere. I know there's a lot of things I type up, which are far from entertaining or amusing in the least, but it's not that I purposely try bore you. I've at least never started an entry with, "I'm bored." and I don't ever intend to. There's something you have to look forward to already.

Unless I ever had an overwhelming amount of readers, then I could go about telling the world who I admire and secretly worship from the distance between the television set and I, but I'm only too confident that that will never happen. I spe.. type from experience. But I will give you one tasty fact to ogle over, males and females alike: I have the same birthday as Johnny Depp. Not bad I say, not bad at all.