::
2002 13 August :: 3.42 am
:: Mood: Assertive
Where the hell are my shoes!?
Ok, Now I'm pissed. I'm losing my special way of feeling for everyone! Oh no! Someone help me! (Catch my sarcasm? Please?)
How pathetic...
Why does a bad thing happen twice?
It seems like everyone is far away. Hello? I'm alone but your sitting right there next to me. If only you could hold my hand....Why aren't you?
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 13 August :: 2.16 am
:: Mood: Sleepless
Shimyshine69: are u always this bubbly? Tbaby92588: I'm pretty much stuck in this bubbly suit...
It first, it bothered me. A lot. A lot. Only because I didn't understand he motives...
But now I do. I think I do? It doesn't matter because he doesn't either.
Now, what about the other two....
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 11 August :: 9.40 pm
:: Mood: productive
:: Music: Quaraishi
Back! You Cheesy Lot of Secondhand Electric Donkey Bottom Biters!!!!!
5 things to do before school:
1. Get a semi-tan (Or, buy some sunless tanner)
2. Get a manucure.
3. Buy that exercise machine from Janette.
4. Get a hair cut.
5. Buy some school clothes.
5 things to do over the school year.
1. Learn to eat healthy.
2. Date Steve.
3. Lose enough weight to stop getting my period. Muahaha
4. Get a math tutor. (Maybe a cute one...)
5. Grow out my hair so it is at my waist by the time I need my senior pics. taken.
5 things before I die:
1. Stay outa of my dads way when he is not himself.
2. Learn about my mom.
3. Hug my brother. (I've never done that before)
4. Write something worth while.
5. Fly.
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 10 August :: 12.29 am
:: Mood: worried
:: Music: Alice In Chains
I know for sure: Life is beautiful.
I've just read in the newspapers... Lindsay's little brother has a terminal illness. I didn't know he was going to die. I just thought he was different. I don't want him to die. Pray for him, eh? Please.
3 sung. |
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 8 August :: 11.49 pm
:: Mood: hungry
Which of the Disney Princesses are you?
1 sung. |
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 8 August :: 11.24 pm
:: Mood: relaxed
:: Music: It used to be Lifehouse, but my mom turned it off....
Sunny Side Up?
Gothic eyes tell me the truth
I never knew
My unknowing reality can’t
Handle this anymore
The realness of all this has come
Much too quickly
These shouts and screams
Are no help, either
This empty water glass
Has more than filled me up
Waking up from an endless dream
Is hard when giving the choice
Awake and alive
That’s what I’m afraid of
I’ve always hated Living in Grey light
But now, more than ever before
This light is the weapon of choice
Once distant tunes
Are playing in my head
Like I can’t forget the words
Running around in my head
Are my careful thoughts
There will be a day
When my trained thoughts
Will lose obedience
It is on this day
I will know everything
~Me August 8th, 2002
1 sung. |
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 6 August :: 7.11 pm
:: Mood: accomplished
:: Music: SmashMouth
I can't handle grapejuice.
I think it is really cool that Gary can say...”Well, you know what I mean.” And I can honestly reply...”You’re right. I do.”
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 6 August :: 1.56 pm
:: Mood: curious
The believer is happy. The doubter is wise.
My mum got mad at me yesterday cuz I was talking to Sheels till thee wee hours of the morning. And, apparently, that is too late. It made my mum mad, but that made me laugh. I’m glad I don’t have her temper...
I was telling Sheels, I let something go yesterday, it feels nice. I think talking to him made me peaceful again. I think before I truly moved on, I needed to know that he was Ok. Really Ok. Subconsciously, I wouldn’t have been able to be with anyone without his approval. Like I said, I’m glad that I’m passed that part of my life.
Truth be told. I’m scared to death. I’m afraid of getting hurt by a guy again. Being hurt by someone special to you is different from other hurts. It drags on and on... I hate it.
Why though?
I shouldn’t be afraid of something I know is good. Is this paranoia? I should be loving every part of this. Something good is happening to me. Something good, indeed, and I’m afraid. He is perfect. Perfect.
Sometimes Sheely is the best person in the world. She told me everything that was great and nothing that wasn’t. It was special because everything she told me was truthful. She wasn’t telling me to make me happy. I like that.
Life is good.
1 sung. |
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 6 August :: 1.03 pm
:: Mood: artistic
Epilogue
Looking back now
Consider it done
It was a nice feeling
But then it faded
In a way
Before my very eyes
And I didn’t even know it
I’m not looking and seeing what isn’t there
Because I know very well what’s there
I’m feeling for another
What I used to feel for you
At first
I almost thought it was wrong
But now it’s all said and done
There is nothing to take
Nothing to give
All that’s left to think of
All that’s not perfectly private
Are the mere memories
Of what was real for a time
I hate to say it
But what used to be lovely chapters
Have now become an
Epilogue
~Me August 6th, 2002
1 sung. |
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 5 August :: 7.48 pm
:: Mood: amused
Daisee 1989: We're having a party tonight!
Tbaby92588: Really? Damn, I'm already in PJs.....
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 5 August :: 6.32 pm
:: Mood: discontent
How does this guy fold towels?
I talked to him today. For the first time in ages....He spoke to me as a human. Yes, this is an improvement. I'll tell you one thing, I don't hate talking to him. I kinda miss him. In a way....Only because everything was set in stone. He never had worries. He believed in set plans. He was so different from me. I did everything like it was something fun, and if it wasn't, I didn't do it. It's strange, cuz the same thing that drove me mad...
That same thing in him, I don't mind. Almost admire?
I'm glad I'm passed that part of life...
Onto another....
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 1 August :: 1.20 am
:: Mood: peaceful
:: Music: Damn WRD commercials...
"I don't like my job. I don't think I'm gonna go anymore..."
I don't feel horrible right now.
This is how I feel when I think I'm most like myself.
Everything doesn't seem screwed up like it normally does. Life can be good. Someone loves me somewhere. I know it.
I don't feel like I know anything, though. I don't every remember that feeling. But somethings are better than they were. I really have no idea why. This is a good feeling.
Enough about feelings.
I take that back.
Feel is all I do.
"I do so much. I see. I hope. I wish. I pray. I think. I feel. But I never do. Why is that?"
A lot of stuff happens. I end up just watching it go by. At times, I drive myself crazy with this thought. Sometimes I wish someone would take out my brain so I wouldn't have to think so much.
Man, I think I'm naive.
How the hell do you spell naive?
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 28 July :: 7.57 am
:: Mood: mellow
Cheater?? WHo took the lucky red ball when I wasn't looking?
Lindsey and her sisters are in Chicago...or maybe she said Illionis... I'm not sure. Rob is getting home from camping today, he was gone to Wilderness for 8 days. I'm glad he'll be back.
Kurt is home now. He needs to use the phone.
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 28 July :: 5.35 pm
:: Mood: calm
It's all good. I can have a ball in a paper bag.
What Flavor Icecream Are You?
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
::
2002 25 July :: 7.36 am
:: Mood: determined
Smokes a pack a day, wait, that's me, but anyway...
EHHEY
I want my belly button peirced. That's all.
For my birthday? Please?
Mum says no, but I really want it!
My brother is going to force her to let me...
Gotta love em...
..you can tell everybody this is your song. |
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