it seems like.. four the past four years....
something from a relient k song. Ive got make the best of my next four years.. okay enough with my introspective future talk. oh, and im super tired. i just got home from babysitting.. i will do my best to make cohereant sentances. Yesterday i finally met britts sister Melissa's fiancee. he's a cutie. his names ken. great ring. ha i do love men that are waaaaaaaaaaay too old for me (i got for the mid-twenties lol) okay... so enough of that talk. i finally got to hang out with nikki j... that was cool. she's stil the same magic counter. and i love her for it. Her me and britt didn't really do anything productive.. we went to jimmy johns... and that was about it. ooh yeah we went to k-mart too... that was crazy we walked home in the pouring rain. Has anyone noticed how jimmy john's is practically becoming my second home?? seriously i go there waaaaaay too much (yet i still am constantly forgetting to ask for "no sprouts") i love jimmy john's thogh. i mean love. like absoulutely adore it. aaah, life's little miracles. haahhahah. Today i went to the mall with kelly ... that was what some could say fun. didn't buy anything except food... which was well... typical lol. i want a new american eagle purse. as well as new makeup. argh. i am such a "things person" its sickening. "things people" as my dad calls them are people that are caught up in "stuff" my mother is an example of this but you can't blame her really... it was how she was brought up. i am constantly thinking of thinks i need to buy.. its soo sad. and petty. and not part of my well balanced diet of Christ. that's for sure rizzle. lol. ill be at andrew soon. maybe then ill be able to think straight. oh, yeah. friday was our retreat... i went home sick (code. period. white pajama pants. cramps. 'nuff said) i missed the homecoming foot ball game subsqentely.. thank God. because i dispise marching... i know im selfish. but ... i dunno. somedays thats okay. we dont' always have to super giving. b i t c h. that's what theyll say about me. lol. : ) toodles gang.


liz<-- i always have things to put here... then i forget them. isn't life always like that.
me: you know like that time i almost stole that cofee from white hen...
ken:whoa! you drink cofee? have you had any today.
me:yeah, and i almost stole it! me! no, im always this obnioxious.
ken:oh.
me:i want a anklet tatoo.
ken:oh, don't get a tatoo.. thats so over.
me:do you have a tatoo?
ken:yeah.
me:i figured.
ken: *stumbling for words* well.. aaah yyeah.

homecoming weekend.
Alright so. homecoming weekend was relatively awesome. The dance itself was pretty lame... Jimmy was such a sucky date.. i seriously don't know why i even waste my time.. he acts like if i touch him he'll get a desease.. ugh so yeah. he's so annoyingly arogant i want to kick him. but yeah enough about him..I saw molly which was rad.. because i haven't seen her like 1937836540264 years. i miss her so. the theme was Hollywood Nights and .. yeah the usuall cheesiness. Yeah my house for pictures.. and getting ready and such... britt came to do my makeup and i msut say she did a pretty nice job. i recieved a wealth of complements about it so she must have done something right... right? lol. nice dresses all around.. generaly good time there. Shannon brough her friend Rene from gym class. she's the coolese kid ever. I'm telling you.. thsi girl is AWESOME. she's totally going to fit in with us. fer rizzle. <3Towards the end of the dance..like at about 10:15 the fire alarm went off.. great, right? lame senior prank. We all smelled smoke as we were walking out.. speical it was. There was small blurb about it in the paper today... that was funny. i ton i out.. partly for my own amusement.. partly because i want to say i as there. Oh, yes another rad part of the dance.. ms.miles was working the coat check. how sweet ace! After the litle fire scare we all gathered out side and took pictures by the fire trucks (all chris's idea i assure you) hahaha. that was great. We went back to my house to eat pizza. Jimmy and I got into a fight. Amy came over. case closed. the boys left and we stayed up and partied till 6am. the guys left at like 12:3o.. pretty []D [] []\/[] []D indeed. At about 3am we (shannon, me, amy, rene,katie, stephanie, and brianna) went to go "vandalize" aka we wrote "Hi Mom" in ketchup and other assorted condements on peoples driveways it was mad fun. ill tell ya that. lol. So then we went home to "sleep" we ended trying some nasty old kalua that my paretns had at the bar. i feel like a huge hypocrite for doing it because i always preach the evils of alchol.. i was just a random, spur of the moment thing. So.. yeah im really not proud of that at all. We ended up just doing that then eating ... like crazy. My mom and I made these great cupcakes. its like cake in ice creamconves then with frosting on top. totaly awesome.. they were delicious. We ended up going to bed at about 6 and woke up at 10:30 (i must say im doing fairly well with only four or so hours of sleep.) everyone went home besides jill.. then jill and i walkd to the NEW library... to meet laura up there ( her family made her go home.. i don't know) they had to do some report on something. i did my spanish homework and i read magazines. We were famished from all our hard work so we dicided to trek to pickermans... and lo and behold it was closed. yes dammit... CLOSED. so that was really.. special. We ended up going to the gas station and buying hot dogs... yeah we lead sad sad suburban lives. we high tailed it back to the library and my mom picked us up. Days like these make me miss summer.. badly. i miss hanging out and having nowhere to go.. im iss my friends. i really just miss the freedom of it all. Did i mention how queer jill and i looked? we both were hauling our back packs..like weirdos. ha. fun times. she told me that i looked like a nerd because my backpack was too high up.. i told she was insane.. then she fixed it for me .. you know so i could be a fraction of her cool. Lol.and that my friend is the end of this crazy adventure. Very very happy that i went to this swore-ray.

liz<-- omygosh. did you see that girls dress? ugh.. her butt. gross.
shannon: yeah, thats my second cousin. she's a hoe.

raawr
okay.. news bad but still, news none the less. i will have to remain at McAuley until the semester.. which is THREE more months. thats as long as summer vacation. that sucks. yes it does. it does it does itdoes. I miss my andrew friends.

today was a day of worthless tears.. i cried because im fat, because i can't transfer.. for no reason at all really. it's insane it really is. So yea, thats that.i feel really ugggggh like right now. i need sleep. Weds- Powderpuff game at andrew saw some ppl in ages.. that was cool. i saw aaron. man does that kid give the best hugs and by the best hugs i mean th BEST hugs. lol. i saw Sean Conklin who is now a cripple. he broke his arm and i couldn't help but make fun. I saw way more action then i needed to going on between matt scott and kristie. then ther was michelle and jason LOL. yes his last name is said like that.. LOL. i love it. they wre gettin' a little frisky and i wanted to remind them to "save room for the holy spirit" but i wasn't doing any quick thinking on my feet that night. The freshman/senior team won. that was cool. Brittanies orlando kid is ridiculously quiet... So yes, all was well. Tomorrow is the homecoming game and mercy day at McAuley.. it is also a dress up day... who the hell thoght of that? My mom being the
[]D [] []\/[] []D of the year because she has bought the willy wonka DVD for me. ooh how i love her. lol. : )) well gang. i think that im wrapping up this entry. pray for me and my current high school stitiuation??!

liz<-- "everything in the world, on it somewhere is a tiny stamp that says 'made by God' and well there really isn't .. but there should be." ah mrs. rave that woman is my hero. I really like that thought too the max, times ten.

i keep fogetting the meanful things i mean to put into meanful cohesive sentances
psh. sorry i needed to somehow title this with the word meaningful or meanign in there a few times.. also i am in love the word cohesive. Lord, help me.. i have decided to go to Andrew... its crazy crazy crazy beans. but i thikn i will like it. no, i know i will like it. Yes. i know i know i know. i hope i hope i hope. Yesterday in theology we had the most insane sub. she was EVIL. and a half... she was calling us all "wannabe clowns... really yucking it up ... for herself. we were laughing at her ..most definately not with her. She looked like a hawk. she made me giggle. Homecoming is saturday. i jsut realized that im nervous because i have never gone to a highschool dance.. and welll yeah.. im just scared. i don't dance. i don't care. and i want to cry... why does high school have to be soooo complicated!!?? I don't know either. Progress reports today. that was a hoot and a hollar. also a bit of a relief. i am doing much better then expected. : )))) getting a c in english thogh. CORRECTION... C+ yeah.. im one perecnt away from a B... the cusp.. give me my damned B! I WANT IT IWANT IT WANT. and all A's and B's for the rest. im barely hanging on to a B in T.K.s class.. and somhow that doesnt' suprise me... but im happy for the B... at least its not a C and i think i'd be happy for a c too... now a D .. that i wouldn't be too pleased with. So i guess all is fair in love and war... toodles. wish me luck and give me prayers!!

liz<-- i love You, Lord Jesus.

these days.
last night was a rice game.. which means i didnt get home until 11. argh. of course they won... again. that means we have to plan the fight song more times in one sitting then anyone would ever want to. I am telling you... the sound track to hell.. is the brotherrice fight song.At least i didn't have to walk on friday .. kelly voiths mom gave me a ride home which was cool. of course maryellen had made some awesome food.. that woman can cook. im telling you.. its a damn good thing theres three of those babies.. she was born to be a mom. Her and i had a long disscussion about catholic school and she thinks its better.. i kinda just went along with her.. i feel guilty like i was lying to her or something. i can't wait to transfer.. no i can't. i watn to be out of that shcool for rizzile. so yeah that was friday. then today im going to fisherfest with jill and her crew which will be my first outing as a catholic school kid. shall be fun i hope. my dad made me breakfast this morning and my mom was gone because for the weekend she is watching the triplets.. i couldn't help but wondering if this is what it would be like if my paretns were divorced me going to my dads for the weekend him making me breakfast.. i dunno ... it just seems.. cool. goodness i wish they were divorced to thmax times ten. but oh well. okay so i had a lot more planned for this entry but oh well. ill catch ya later dudes.


liz<-- maryellens shirt "im off duty cop and im workin' on a case"

high school...
i have two amazing fathers. the first one is awe to the some but i havent met Him yet. Yes, he is my wonderful heavenly father. He truly is super cool. The next is my earth father (haha sounds like im an alien) thomas j. is one cool cat. he called the dean at andrew today "just to look into transfering" he's a great kid. Detention was today with jillian. that was cool.. NOT. that was the most boring experience of my life. goodness gracious we sat for 45 minutes to truly do nothing, you don't know the meaning iof the word nothing until you have had a mcauley detention. Im trying out for model U.N. i think... how cool would htat be. i'd be like the olsen twins in winning london. for sure. hahaha. so yeah today was well yeah, pretty trippy swell.


liz<-- Karen: so how've ya been jackie?
Jack: Well you know, lookin' good smellin' fine. if i wasn't so busy, i'd date myself!

high school...
i have two amazing fathers. the first one is awe to the some but i havent met Him yet. Yes, he is my wonderful heavenly father. He truly is super cool. The next is my earth father (haha sounds like im an alien) thomas j. is one cool cat. he called the dean at andrew today "just to look into transfering" he's a great kid. Detention was today with jillian. that was cool.. NOT. that was the most boring experience of my life. goodness gracious we sat for 45 minutes to truly do nothing, you don't know the meaning iof the word nothing until you have had a mcauley detention. Im trying out for model U.N. i think... how cool would htat be. i'd be like the olsen twins in winning london. for sure. hahaha. so yeah today was well yeah, pretty trippy swell.


liz<-- Karen: so how've ya been jackie?
Jack: Well you know, lookin' good smellin' fine. if i wasn't so busy, i'd date myself!

what you see, what you see is human.
Indeed. i am hunman. Funny, all my entries seem to get their inspiration from the music im listening to. i really need to get out more. I finally got "27 Snapshots of summer" devolped although not all of them turned out.. im mad disappointed about that. indeed. my budbha didn't turn out which is a bit disapoing.Tomorrow we will be taking our pictures.. that will be swell.. haha. What ever top you want with your unifrom skirt.. hot ... oh yess. I was assigned a marching band uniform today... i swear those things were made in the seventies. they are literally yellow from sweat. its sick. it should be a crime. we need new uniforms so bad. and i mean SOOOO BAD. lol. We also finally recieved our uniform shoes.. they closely resemble those prescription orthopedic walking shoes, you know the kind the old ppl have... yeah, very attractive indeed. I want to transfer sooooo badly. badly like just.. i dunno but i realy want to. Ugh. enought of me. how abuot you? drop me line. (ooh i might change my commentlines)


liz<-- just remember.. don't get a reputation as a quitter.. you can't quit life.

yesterday and mrs.sheila rave
Okay well yesterday was thursday. Ellen and I walked ourselves to Jimmy Johns (omygoodness their vegi sub is to DIE for) then we tried to find a new "short cut" this shannagan... was my idea. We were al fine with our short cut until we cut through a yard that ended in very tall, thorny "things" ellen had shoes on, but i had on flip flops.. we got terrible stuck and poked but made it through. It was the like field in the wizard of oz, the poppies... it was insane! i thought i was gonna suddenly fall asleep. but all the thorns and prickly things would definately have woken me up. lol. So that was yesterday. Today is today .. i have decided to give up swearing... basically because mrs.rave told me too.. but she's so cute with her little old gramma ideas. She said that her parents never really swore her husband never really swore and she didn't either. the first time she ever heard the f word spoken was when she was like in her 20s... i found that cute. I love mrs.rave she reminds me of Mrs.Eggert, for whom i have a soft spot in my heart. So yes, no more swears for me. im really gonna try my darndest... goodness i shall be tough. How am i doing so far? hopefully well. Ill get the verse where this no swearing kick came from... sortly i will. TODAY- Thank the Lord its finaly friday. i didn't thikn i could be at that school anymore today... i couldn't. no i couldn't. i hate high school i really do. actually i hate change and i want to go back to the way things used to be. . . fer sure. I was awarded my first high school detention today... and why?!?1 BECAUSE MY SOCKS WERE OUT OF UNIFORM. i should have listened to my mother. i know. grr.So yeah, i have to serve that after school on tuesday.. yipee. Today i also found myself a new lunch table.. grand indeed.

liz<-- it's funny how we waltz in and out of eachothers lives without even realizing it, Some times i will i had a crystal ball and a stick for that reason... a crystal ball to tell who would cause trouble in my life and a stick to trip those unwanted waltzers.

i hate school i hate school
i hate school. yes i said it three times.. get the message? yeah, thought so. The new library opened yesterday, im going with my mother to check that out this evening.. shall be sweet ace. Yesterday was little joes as usual...britts was upset because of my new scabby like thing. and i thikn my mother has finally caught on that i really didn't stop. But whatever... itll all be okay i smoothed things over with both i think. Only two days until the weekend. Yes!!!! see this? i count down until the weekends... its two days away from school. how sad is that? ugh i almost got a dentention today too.. i found that really funny it was for uniform. im the most unifrom of the bunch.. puh leez. see my xanga for details on uniform. hahaha.

liz<--i was a fool to think to think that i should stop you from undressing.

i want so badly to believe that there is truth that love is real.
micheal is offically home, so thats good. i haven't seen him yet.. but i will tomorrrow.. not sure waht im all excited about just yet. lol. Alright well today, my mother and i went to old navy... goodness that store is like... wonderful... wonderful, yes thats the word.. i bought a skirt that was ... get ready... 1.97 woooohoooo. lol. then a cute cardigan and one of those fun lingerie like tops.. its pink its cute as all hell. and who did i see in old navy but Gary Weissman, after all that is his place of employment. lol. then to top off the major coolness of old navy they played THE POSTAL SERVICE.. clark gable no less... i was absolutely giddy in the store.. i love that song.. so yes after old navy my good buddy kelly voith came around to meet jimmy and that was good... all was well there. I babysat at 6:30 i got bit by a six year old. life is all in order. for homecoming i believe i am going to wear the pink dress i bought but did not wear to the 8th grade dance.. i am going with james ... shall be quite fun this will make or break my choice of schools next year. :) haaaa. alls well.

liz<--don't feed me lines about some idealistic future, your heart won't heal right if you keep tearing out the sutures.

you can\'t change who you are
mrs.rave was right.. you have seven gives and two gifts .... given .. is yourself you can't always be who you want to be or who they want you to be... i will never be one of htem. oh i wishi could be. well whatever. im tired.. football game tonight... yeah. that was great. talked to rocco and got to know him a little btter. i really like him.. he seems rad... like aaron but radder. lol. sleep sleep sleep.

liz<- micheals home!!! yay for me. yay for molly... shes a doll... she asked if he was okay. love her .. ooh yes i do.

i dont know what i want.
ARGH. i don't know what i want anymore. i really can't handle high school either way public at andrew or private and mcauley... i just don't know what to do with myself. no no no..... i wish life was like elementry school all the time... i don't wnat to have to make my owned damned decisions... i regret ever growing up. tonight, tuesday is a night that britt and amy and i go out. amy brings dave... britt bailed tonight.. argh. i was bit upset ... she said too much homework. that's crap she gets home two hours before me and didn't have to go clarinet or take a shower... you know waht i get home at five take a shower, practice clarinet and go to lessons and you say that you dont have time? puh leeez. i love the girl to peices but that really pissed me off... to the max to the extreme ... fer sure. well im glad i went anyway with just amy and dave. I like dave .. aww his eyes... hellz yes. lol. i was mad mostly because i had a great outfit on... i made myself look way pretty lol. i was a vision in my little pink cardigan and lime head band... im tellin' emo chic lol. ha. i love that i have all my good clothes to wear now after school. taht doesn't mean i like McAuley. ha. i don't even think i don't like it.. there's just someting wrong with me.. i need help or prozac or something crazy liket hat. ooh woohu how ive missed you so.

liz<-- oh yeah im back... xanga has to much going on for my liking.. today i was like.. okay i need to write and i just clicked into woohu... i didn't even think about it.. that tells ya something right there . lol.

tearful goodbyes could never be sweeter.
Goodbye woohu. i am leaving you. i have an xanga now (which you all sholud check out http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=sonshine90) but yeah... i will miss you. i love you woohu. i really do. and i guess i wll keep this site around just because i love it so very very much. i feel like a sellout leaving my baby... live journal is for yuppies xanga is just pimp. but woohu just owns. its gotten too cool for me.. yeah thats it. jsut like everything else. lol. I LOVE YOU. I WILL MISS YOU. LOYAL FANS-- come visit me. i will wait to see who posts on my new site i will not go around being a crazy self promoter... i will let it get its own public. yeah, in yo face. ilove you woohu. i don't want to leave but i fear i must. ugh. no. no no no no no no no no. why do i do these things that i hate myself for? oh well later.


liz<-- im a sellout. sellout with me?http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=sonshine90

nothing really.
well orientation went well, band has gone well, everything is okay. my ducks are inline. micheals finally coming home for a while... for his dads birthday and for his. september 13th... hell be 22... not a waste of life. even now when i talk about it my eyes tear up.. its been a couple months. and i never said goodbye... or told him anything... oh i wish i would have not taken the time for granted with him.. i know hell be beter and back soon but i miss him while he's gone and it's ridiculous to miss someone so much. I cannot wait to see him. and i want to fill in the whole in his heart.. its nto her fault. i know its not... he'll find himself and come home okay.

liz<-- i know this is random. i dont care. taht needed to be said. for real. lol