Best years of your life???

:: 2004 11 January :: 8.07pm

THANK YOU PJ

you're the best<3

:: 2004 10 January :: 11.08pm
:: Mood: good
:: Music: get low

The Berenstein Bears<3.
My mom and step dad are such dorks, but so cute. I got home from the theatre, and their in the back yard, with blankets and hot tea, infront of a fire (one of those chimney things). their such d0rks.

<3mandyy

2 hallas | halla back

:: 2004 10 January :: 12.01am

First and formost, my new lay out is awesome.
Survey time!

FIRSTS

First screen name: Gilly8268
First piercing/tattoo: ears
First credit card: a month ago
First true love: not yet
First enemy: lol in 4th or 5th grade, Natalie Croy.
First concert: All That Music Festival and More =)!
First musician you remember hearing in your house: hmm, probally Greatful Dead

LASTS

Last big car ride: I guess to Jupiter last weekend.
Last kiss: over thanksgiving break?
Last library book: Cut, over summer break
Last movie seen: Cheaper By the Dozen
In the theatre: Cheaper by the Dozen
Last food consumed: my moms left over sushi
Last phone call: Lauren
Last CD played: lol, my NOW 2 cd<3
Last annoyance: the old people at work
Last soda drank: coke
Last time scolded: this moring, cause i had to go home for a couple minutes during 3rd hour =\
Last website visited: www.woohu.com =)

SHORT ANSWER

I AM: cold and tired
I WANT: my room to be cleaned
I HAVE: too many bug bites ;x
I WISH: i had love
I HATE: being alone
I FEAR: not knowing what i want to do with my life
I HEAR: my computer
I WONDER: if i can clean my room in time for the game tomorrow
I LOVE: you
I ACHE: not now
I ALWAYS: try and smile
I AM NOT: genuinely happy
I DANCE: in my car, alone.
I SING: in the shower
I CRY: too much
I WRITE: a lot lately
I WIN: nothing
I LOSE: hopes
I CONFUSE: myself
I NEED: to clean my room and sleep
I SHOULD: do all that, but I won't.

YES or NO

YOU KEEP A DIARY: yes
YOU LIKE TO COOK: depends
YOU HAVE A SECRET YOU HAVEN'T SHARED WITH ANYONE: i guess you can say that

DO YOU...?

HAVE A CRUSH: yeah
WANT TO GET MARRIED: yeah
GET MOTION SICKNESS: yeah
THINK YOURE A HEALTH FREAK: not really
GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS: most of the time
LIKE THUNDERSTORMS: yeah
CURRENT HAIR COLOR: reddish?
BIRTHPLACE: boynton beach, florida

FAVORITES

NUMBER: 19
COLOR:black, yellow and hott pink
DAY: friday/saturday
MONTH: anything btwn december-april
SONG(S): dunno
SEASON: winter and spring
DRINK: now, water.

PREFERENCES

CUDDLE OR MAKE OUT: cuddle
CHOCOLATE MILK, OR HOT CHOCOLATE: choclate milk
MILK, DARK OR WHITE CHOCOLATE: ALL!
VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE: chocolate

IN THE LAST DAY, HAVE YOU...

CRIED? yeh
HELPED SOMEONE? yeah, at work
BOUGHT SOMETHING? gas
GOTTEN SICK? nope
GONE TO THE MOVIES? to see solange
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? nope
SAID 'i love you'?: to my mommy<3
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER: nope
TALKED TO AN EX?: nope
MISSED AN EX?: nope
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL?: yeah
HAD A SERIOUS TALK?: no
MISSED SOMEONE?: yess
HUGGED SOMEONE?: yess
FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND?: yes

WOULD YOU EVER:

Eat a bug?: no.
Bungee jump?: yes, i kinda have/sorta.
Kill someone?: maaybe ;x
Parachute from a plane?: yess
Walk on hot coals?: no
Go out with someone for their looks?: no
Be a vegetarian?: no
Wear plaid with stripes?: not seriously
IM a stranger?: yeah
Sing Karaoke?: depends where
Get drunk off your Ass?:yeah
Shoplift?: no
Run a red light?: i have..;x
Star in a porn video?: nope
Dye your hair blue?: nope
Be on Survivor?: nope
Wear makeup in public?: yes
Not wear makeup in public?: yess
Cheat on a test?: mhmm
Make someone cry?: yeah..i dont know, depends.
Date someone more than 10 years older than you?: probally not, thats a big difference.
Stay up all night?: yeah

<3mandyy
x to the o.

comment on my lay out, is it a nay or a yay?

7 hallas | halla back

:: 2004 9 January :: 11.52pm
:: Mood: uneasy
:: Music: Funeral For A Friend

.Breath out, so I can breathe you in.
Work.. is exhausting. I just ate some buffalo strips and now I think I'm gonna puke. I wish I had someone to cuddle up with after a long night of shit work. But I don't wanna be all.. ooh i have no boyfriend. Blah. Today i hung out with Gian Carlo.. got some new flippy flops.. annnd we talked music. Mmm music. I need to go.. collapse. Peace.

:: 2004 8 January :: 3.20pm

This is my plee for help from anyone from 4992
AHHHHHHHH! I'm so confused. Ok to clarify any question for the dramatarians that still read this, yes, I did drop drama. I wasn't enjoying the class anymore, it used to be fun, but now i didn't like it. I was scared and bored, not a good combo. So i dropped it, and I didn't talk to Mrs. Hasko yet, cause my guidance counselor took care of it, and she GAVE MY SPOT AWAY FOR DISTRICTS. I'm seriously going to cry about that, I paid my money to go as an observer, thats all I wanted and now I can't go. SOMEONE who reads this, PLEASE HELP ME WITH MY HASKO PROBLEM, please!!!!!!!!!

<3mandyy

6 hallas | halla back

:: 2004 7 January :: 5.59pm
:: Mood: poop

Mr. play it safe, was afriad to fly, packed his suitcase, kissed his kids goodbye.
Everything can be summed up with one word, interesting. I'm opening my eyes up to everything around me, and taking it all in, piece by piece, bit by bit. I went grocery shopping today, I kinda liked it, except the paying for everything part, that kinda sucked. Oh, so everyone knows, I've been writing in my livejournal more often, and it's friends only, so if you wanna be my buddddy on LJ, holla. www.livejournal.com/users/fandapop . I'm talking to Co right now, he's my chinese friend, but he's sooo nice. God, I miss everyone at work. o0o0o Co told me that the deerfield boys, are all playing football on Saturday, now I have to find a way to weasel my way into going, I wanna see Pat, Mike and Mauricio. hmm..ok I'm off to dinner with my dad, maybe things won't be that bad. xox

<3mandyy

p.s. Patrick Moran, if you see this...call me.

2 hallas | halla back

:: 2004 7 January :: 3.38am
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: The Cure - The Lovecats

hiiii
<3
this song makes me smile.

2 hallas | halla back

:: 2004 6 January :: 9.50pm

Wow, just when I was beginning to think not too many people cared, and I was in this for myself..I got a voice mail from the unexpected. Thank you Pat Moran for that message, you made my day. xo

<3

:: 2004 6 January :: 9.43pm

I'm starting fresh, clean slate, heh...it's all over from here

;x

:: 2004 6 January :: 3.17pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Story Of The Year

I stand alone, im on my own, my hands will bleed, im holding on to what is gone... what's left of me
i feel, drained of emotion. like i have nothing to feel. there's a void, constantly, always there, never goes away no matter how many nights i close my eyes and try to drown it out with sleep. It has nothing to do with the ex, nothing to do with anything. It just is. And will continue to be until i find something to fill it.
Pass the time until something worth stopping the clocks comes along.

3 hallas | halla back

:: 2004 4 January :: 2.23pm
:: Music: linkin park // numb

I want what I had, and what I had wasn't what I wanted.
This weekend was an eye opener for me. I had too much thinking time on my hands is what I'll call it. I left Friday with Lauren, Dan, Heather, Brian, Matt, and other Brian for camping. It was fun, I loved it. I'm not so sure, how i felt about being there with the ones I was with, not cause I don't like them, or anything of that matter, I just felt so alone. All weekend, I had this pit in my stomach, of loneliness. We were on the beach on Saturday, it hit me hard. I had to walk away, and I cried and cried. A good cry can truly help sometimes. The other day, when someone asked me what was wrong, I said I don't know, I'm just kind of sad and alone, they told me it's called depression..I am not a depressed person, and that really bothered me to think I'm depressed? I don't know how I'm feeling right now, but I know for sure, I'm feeling regret, too much of it. Another thing that I thought about this weekend was Sunrise Cinema's and how much I want it back. How much I loved my work friends, and how good I had it there. But I fucked things up there with my boss, and I ruined my chances. Now, I'm screwed, and there isn't one thing I can do, to get it back. So I'm left here now, sad alone and regretful, and all want to do is talk, but the words won't come out.

:: 2004 2 January :: 7.17pm
:: Mood: hippity hoppity
:: Music: Seal

Hi. Im better now. Im gonna go show my brother the luxurious and exciting town of Boca Raton.. wooooo. No. But really, im gonna go pierce my ear once more and then drive around until he sees something that looks remotely fun. I guess if i was a big party animal, id bring him to the hip cool parties.. but .. i am not.

:: 2004 2 January :: 1.08pm
:: Mood: aggravated
:: Music: tori amos - icicle

bah.
fuck you. that's all i want to say, and i want to say it to somebody because they're an asshole and i hate them for being who they are now. but i cant. they're too far gone that it probably would'nt matter anymore anyways.

:: 2004 2 January :: 2.04am
:: Music: nirvana // smells like teen spirit

My friends got a girlfriend and he hates that bitch, he tells me everyday.
Tomorrow, or rather today is camping. I dont know why but Im scared, and nervous...like I dont wanna go anymore? But i think once i get there, i'll have fun. Yeah, so it's 2am and I still havent packed, i ahte packing, and i dont know what to bring, so now im scurred. lol. Atleast i found my sleeping bag, thats a plus. I'm suppose to go to Deerfield for a bit to chill w/ Mauricio but he's making all these comments and now I'm scared, so I'm trying to get out of it and he's guilting me into it cause he says that I always have an excuse. And I've been doing too much thinking tonight, I think I'm in love with a former friend of mine, like i'm really sad about him now. Im missing Maria like crazy, last night at 12 I called her, and started crying, i miss her in my life, a lot. I need to go shopping, I own no clothing that's wearable anymore. It's cold out, I think I need a new sweater. And I'm tired, but i have to pack and go to deerfield, sorry mauricio but i think my trip to deerfield is going to be postponed. I'll write again when I get bck from my trip to let you know how it was. holla youngin, woop woop.

<3mandyy
x to the o.

:: 2004 1 January :: 1.37pm
:: Mood: lazy
:: Music: Poe

.Thursday Afternoon Ramblings.
I didn't make any new year's resolutions cuz I think they're stupid. I probably wouldn't keep them anyways. I burned the roof of my mouth and it hurts so bad when i eat now. I hate when I buy like 3 new cds in the course of one week. One whole week should be devoted to one brand new cd cuz if you get three new cd's in the same week, you can't really appreciate each cd seperatly. Ah well. Poe or Story Of The Year.. Strange woman singing or angry boy screaming? Let's go with Poe and save SOTY for the next time I get angry and storm off in my car. My Christmas was amazing. I got everything I wanted and more, and everyone loved the presents I got them, so that makes me happy. I got a digital camera, and seriously, it's the best gift I've ever gotten. I love it, I take pictures of everything. Anytime I see anything even remotely beautiful, I take a picture of it. I got a few good sunrises and smiles on it already. My big brother's coming tomorrow to stay for a few days, im so excited. I gotta work in two hours, season has definitely kicked in, were on 45 minutes waits on tuesday nights.. craziness. Peace world, Happy New Year.. 2004, damn, should'nt we all be using flying cars or something by now?