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sometimes truth is stranger than fiction

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losttt

:: 2003 6 March :: 8.48am
:: Music: fuel- jesus or a gun

{blank}
so tell me know. who's my saving one? jesus or a gunnnnn?

i'm sure on paper, life appeared to be a sound creation. as does everything else. is this temporal existance leading anyone anywhere? or is it just an orgy of chemical reactions here to carry us out to death? who knows.

3 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 5 March :: 9.13pm
:: Mood: euphoric <3

beach + Brian + kisses = Euphoria <3

...then again, anything + Brian would make me the happiest camper en el mundo!!!

<3<3<3<3<3

7 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 3 March :: 8.44pm
:: Mood: how quickly you fall from the top of the world...
:: Music: From Autumn to Ashes - Short Stories with Tragic Endings

i hate people. really.
Here you stand seething with guilt.
Silence only justifies this act of cowardice.
The look stapled on your face cries out for forgiveness,
the one thing that I cannot give you.

Did you ever see that one person
and the way they do these things
and it hurts so much it's like choking.. choking?

I can give you freedom from your guilt,
with a flick of my wrist onto yours.
I can give you peace of mind with a forced smile.

I can give you death with the look upon my face.

This is your freedom in a life of fallacy,
with no last kiss & no regrets;
you don't deserve good bye.
This is your freedom in a life of fallacy,
with no last kiss & no good bye.

Here you stand seething with guilt.
Silence only justifies this act of cowardice.
With a short story, the one you add to daily, you are the tragic loss.
No story book ending for this fairy tale of you.
Just the one composed with blood taken from your pen that you hold in your lifeless hand.
Cry for you. Shed tears. Mourn. Wish the end.

Did you ever look, did you ever see that one person,
and the subtle way that they do these things and it hurts so much?
So much it's like choking down the embers of a great blaze.
It's that moment when your eyes seem to spread aspersions
and to scream confessions at the insipid sky parting clouds.
You let this one person come down on the most perfect moment.
And it breaks my heart to know the only reason you are here now is a reminder of what I'll never have..
I'll never have.. I'll never...
Standing so close knowing that it kills me to breathe you in..
standing so close knowing that it kills me to breathe you in.
But this table for one has become bearable.
I now take comfort in this, and for this, I cherish you.
Did you ever look, did you ever see that one person
and the subtle way that they do these things and it hurts so much?
So much it's like choking down the embers of a great place.
It's that moment when your eyes seem to spread aspersions
and to scream confessions at the insipidsky parting clouds.
And you let this one person come down.. come down. I cherish you.. I cherish you.
Just say that you would do the same for me..
just say you would do the same..
just say you would do the same for me.
For as much as I love Autumn,

I'm giving myself to Ashes...

why are people so merciless?


5 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 3 March :: 4.45pm

i am the luckiest girl in the world <3

heh thats how I have been feeling lately, just wonderful! (thanks to certain beary special persons :0P)

Well.. to clarify, I honestly have no idea whats going on... seems like everyone else knows more about me & my love life then i do lol but thats okay, things are really good now...

heh okay Drew, enough of my rant :0P

Atlantic band = worthless.

oOo. guess who sooo go their Used & Coheed tickets as well as TBS & FATA!!!!! envy me :0)

5 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 2 March :: 6.22pm

who wants to run away with me... anywhere, i don't care.

25 going | downtown.


losttt

:: 2003 2 March :: 12.30pm

life is wearing me down. draining me of energy. depression wears a strange face. last night this dead end sign stuck in my fucking mind. repeating over and over again. everything is a dead end. reality is such a bitch.

2 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 2 March :: 11.27am

resentment. confusion.hurt.

i wish i knew something... anything.

the.end.

5 going | downtown.


losttt

:: 2003 1 March :: 1.29am

the pitter patter of life
why. the fuck. does this life have to be so goddamn inconsequential. so alone. so raging homosexual. a fucking monkey could put on a sean suit and the probability of the switch being noticed is....0/1? idk im not in AP stats.

we need another world war. people are too fucking jaded and oblivious. society needs a reality check.

4 going | downtown.


losttt

:: 2003 27 February :: 10.47pm

i am sorry.

2 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 27 February :: 7.46pm

today was soo wonderful...

the break down:
9:10 met at Megan's house (me, Ash, Megan, Brian, Paul, Sharif, Chris)
~went to the beach & met up w/Matt
~ Brian and I laid out while everyone else went in
~haha we're smart.. there was a blue/yellow flag due to man o war
~ everyone went to the Marriott to go in the pool but I didn't feel like going so Brian stayed with me.. it was nice, really.
~ everyone got kicked out so they came back
~ off to Docs but it was closed so went 2 Dunkin Donuts
~ Sharif went back to school & Matt disappeared
~ rest of us went back to Megans where Chris and Paul went back to school
~ Brian, Ash, Megan & I went to Veterans park where we swung on the midget swings & just chilled
~ they went back to school.. Ash and I decided to not go :0P ( i know we're bad...)
~ Ash & I drove to Deerfield beach where we ate at the Kahuna then went to IWS - no beach parking
~ went back to boca where we chilled at her clubhouse (its sooo nice!)
~ went in the pool and laid out & napped for an hour (vivis all tan!)
~ bumped into Mike and Betty
~ went back to Ashleys

and now i'm home & talking to Brian :0)

so yes, today was a very beautiful day <3

4 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 27 February :: 12.58am

today is going to be a beautiful day <3

(i really hope so anyways...)

6 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 26 February :: 8.06pm

URGENT MESSAGE!!!!
Date Sara B.!

The.End.

16 going | downtown.


losttt

:: 2003 24 February :: 9.48pm

life is but a dream. created for your comfort. conformed for your viewing pleasure. life = death. things die. things are created. get used to it.

2 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 24 February :: 6.28pm

vivi = too tired :0( spent half the night writing my stupid world lit but its okay, I had Brian pseudo keeping me company telling me about his cartoons and such :0P

in response to the poem he wrote about me:

Brian E.,
why can't you see,
falling on your balls
won't make your children tall.

You are very cute
but you choose to refute
We all know its true
so don't be so blue.

Brian + Vivi + Drew + Sara B. = a bunch of sexy bitches. The End.

everyone still loves my hair!!! its really nice getting complemented all the time :0) and lots of people came up to me and were like "we're sooo cutting our hair now too!" I really don't know if I honestly do look hotter but I think I feel hotter haha

<3<3

6 going | downtown.


plainmornings

:: 2003 22 February :: 10.52pm

So yeah. my hair is 14" shorter and pure sexiness haha... actually my mom says I have to wait and see what everyone says but I really don't care, I love it!

The show was great! ADASTRA won the battle of the bands!!!! take that Fallen from the sky haha nooo Adastra played soooo good tonight though, great great show followed by Dennys @ Linton & Federal.. good times cept 4 the damn bitches there. Got to see the twins <3 and everyone else. good times. oh yeah, Ben looked really hot in his atire tonight :0P ahh everyone looked really hot tonight :0P im me for pics if you want them

goodnight<3

14 going | downtown.

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