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denation
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2005 21 November :: 12.06am
im probably not gonna be doing woohu much anymore, cuz i just started a myspace and ill most likely be doing everything on there... same with my xanga too.
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l<3ve
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denation
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2005 20 November :: 10.26pm
BK is really starting to get to me, and not in a good way. i mean, its not my coworkers cuz i love all of them. its really not the business aspect, cuz im getting more and more used to the whole managing thing and how to take care of the store. no, its more of the monotonous things i have to do every single day that's just making work so boring. every night i go in and its the same damn thing. take orders... deal with pissy customers... make sandwiches... clean steamer... clean dining room... close store... its just getting so dull that there's no fun in it anymore, no challenge. i think the only solution is to start looking for a new job. something to break up the repitition. i have a lot of thinking to do, and nothing is set in stone yet.
i went to see the wizard of oz at the highschool on saturday. i cheered on cherie, ben, shannon, and even saw a few people i remembered from when i was in school. it was cool.
Dec. 1st is gonna be awesome
lyrics:
I don't wanna' spend my life jaded
Waiting to wake up one day and find
That I've let all these years go by
Wasted
l<3ve
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liz
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2005 20 November :: 9.52pm
so yeha. im am wiped the fuck out
i mean literally ray and i just skatedboarded for two hours.
it was damn cool.
only i wiped out and my hand is all filled with gravel and my elbow is bleeding.
but i feel happy.
we had a good night.'
now he is going to the medcenter because he has been pretty sick and his mom said that he needs to go and so he is.
whatever.
l<3ve
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liz
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2005 20 November :: 6.00pm
F"UCK
that is me screaming fuck in frustration at you.
\okay.
he is angry at me. damn damn.
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l<3ve
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Paradox
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2005 19 November :: 4.45pm
It's been a real bumpy weekend. Highs and lows, and there of the highest and lowest points.
Example: Yesterday I decided to go to the play (again). And everything was good. Then we went to Ihop, and that sucked badly.
e.g. #2: I went to breakdance today, learned some new flips I was happy. Only to find out that someone stole 60 dollars from me at the gymnastics place. I'm pissed. But tonight. I'll be with erika, and most likely things will be better...
Damn roller coaster we call life.
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l<3ve
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liz
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2005 18 November :: 12.24am
JOSLYN I love you.
come see me.
i want to cry and i dont know why.
what is going on.
everything is falling so fast
stupid stupid fall out boy.
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l<3ve
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liz
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2005 18 November :: 12.13am
do you ever feel like every choice that you make is wrong. like your happy for the moment but fucking yourself over in the long run.
i dont feel it.
im afraid of what i do feel.
its odd.
different.
i dont want to get bored.
i went to meet him at work and he was like so what are your plans for midnight and i was like, sleeping and he was like well there is this movie that i guess you were kinda interested in seeing and i was hoping you would let me take you and i was like.
awww.
i am going to take my little sister on saturday though, and then we were going to go see it anyway.
but then i said no save your money we will go see walk the line or jarhead or a movie that you want to see and he was like, i want to do something nice for you though. i love you and i know youve been waiting for the release for awhile and i was like, sweetie you would not enjoy yourself lets just sleep, you have school in the morning and all.
so here we are and im okay with that.
he is a really great guy.
not sure why he loves me so much.
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l<3ve
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liz
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2005 18 November :: 12.11am
He drowns in his dreams
An exquisite extreme I know
He's as damned as he seems
And more heaven than a heart could hold
And if I try to save him
My whole world would cave in
Lord, it just ain't right
Lord, it just ain't right
Oh and i don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
He's such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster
He's magic and myth
As strong as what I believe
A tragedy with
More damage than a soul should see
And do I try to change him
So hard not to blame him
Hold me tight
Baby, hold me tight
Oh and I don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
He's such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster
I'm longing for love and the logical
But he's only happy hysterical
I'm searching for some kind of miracle
Waited so long
So long
He's soft to the touch
But frayed at the end he breaks
He's never enough
And still he's more than I can take
Oh and I don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
He's such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster
l<3ve
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kellilynn21
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2005 17 November :: 9.53pm
:: Mood: Surprisingly Happy*
What A Day!
Today was.... totally unpredictable.
This morning was like the worst morning ever. But then it got a little bit better, then it was horrible again… but then the afternoon was wonderful.
I drove to Kerrilynn’s today after school and staid there from like 3:30-9:00, and her dad cooked us all dinner and stuff. Little Katherine hung out with Kerri and I, and watched Charlie & the Chocolate Factory with us. I’ve fallen in love with that family.<3
Haha- Today during 1st hour me and Jess sat in there for like 20 minutes just catching up on like... EVERYTHING. We should so do that more often;) lol jk.
Im Not The Only One Who Thinks Im Making The Right Decision.
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l<3ve
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liz
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2005 17 November :: 2.21pm
GOWD
I hate college.
No I hate myself for being such a slacker and not trying at all.
I am totally going to have to retake this stupid ass prereq stupid ass algebra class again.
why?
because I dont try at all and I have put forth no effort and I got a test back today that I got a 36% on.
DAMN YOU LIZZY.
im so upset with myself I am so so SO much better than that. I am smart. not like yeah liz is smart but like SMART.
I should be doing really well in an entry level sort of class like math 110. .
I am just really really upset with myself. I don't know If I can dig myself out of this algebraic hole that I am in but by god I am going to try.
the teacher gave us this big whole lecture too.
he is all talking about how it is his last semester and that if he likes a student he is going to take that into account when he gives them a grade and that policy doesnt matter to him because what is the school going to do? Fire him. nope he doesnt care. so its time for liz to buckle down and start kissing some major teacher ass.
or just study and do good on the next test and ace the final because what the fuck liz you are smart and better than an F.
so angry with myself.
you dont even know the resentment i feel for myself and for being a big old failure at life.
god at least ive got ray.
where is he anyway.
not at school cuz hes just as big of a slacker as I am. he hasnt been to school in like three days.
stupid high school boys ill tell ya.
to bed. i need to sleep. im going to have some pizza with my ma later. so yeah.
i should study instead.
hugs and shit
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l<3ve
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