silentcriez
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2003 18 November :: 9.43pm
Disorder Info
Eccentric Personality Disorders: Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal
Individuals with these disorders often appear odd or peculiar.
Paranoid Personality Disorder - individual generally tends to interpret the actions of others as threatening.
Schizoid Personality Disorder - individual generally detached from social relationships, and shows a narrow range of emotional expression in various social settings.
Schizotypal Personality Disorder - individual is uncomfortable in close relationships, has thought or perceptual distortions, and peculiarities of behavior.
Dramatic Personality Disorders: Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic, and Narcissistic
Individuals with these disorders have intense, unstable emotions, distorted self-perception, and/or behavioral impulsiveness.
Antisocial Personality Disorder - individual shows a pervasive disregard for, and violation of, the rights of others.
Borderline Personality Disorder - individual shows a generalized pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image, and observable emotions, and significant impulsiveness.
Histrionic Personality Disorder - individual often displays excessive emotionality and attention seeking in various contexts. They tend to overreact to other people, and are often perceived as shallow and self-centered.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder - individual has a grandiose view of themselves, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy that begins by early adulthood and is present in various situations. These individuals are very demanding in their relationships.
Anxious Personality Disorders: Avoidant, Dependent, Obsessive-Compulsive
Individuals with these disorders often appear anxious or fearful.
Avoidant Personality Disorder - individual is socially inhibited, feels inadequate, and is oversensitive to criticism
Dependent Personality Disorder - individual shows an extreme need to be taken care of that leads to fears of separation, and passive and clinging behavior.
Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder - individual is preoccupied with orderliness, perfectionism, and control at the expense of flexibility, openness, and efficiency.
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avoident borderline and histrionic sound just like me....
I LOVE KELSEY AND LIZZY YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST IN THE WHOLE GOD DAMN WORLD
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 16 November :: 9.08pm
more poems and more poems and more
thjis is getting kind of scarey i cant stop writing!!!
silent motion
insolent notion
tainted emotion
jaded exploition
all that falls behind
is everythign we need
from this dulled knife
is not from what we bleed
reach out your hand and slice me
cut me
releasing these emotions untrue to reality
tatter me
undressing me
unveiling me
this is me
what you see
silent motion
insolent notion
tainted emotion
jaded exploition
-------------------------------------------------------
the drone of your voice
it drives me wild
i sit here in your presence
hoping you will feel me
hoping you will need me
as we dance you hold my hips
and our pink lips they kiss
uninhabbited dreams
virgin souls
inpenitrable
intolerable
so new
as i am withered
and warried
inhabbited and tolerable
this pain resolutes beneath this veil
beneath the shadows of the unknown
or the unwanted...
the kiss of darkness
the touch of pain
the lick of death
and the spin of the insane...
-------------------------------------------------------------
the shot is heard
louder when all is silent
softer when all is loud
ringing though the endless crowd
chipper peopel all around
not knowing what it is that they are fearing
yet still fearing it all in itself
uncontrollable
it rages through.. plagueing at me
until i fall...
the shot is heard....
i fall
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 16 November :: 6.05pm
:: Music: odd music
lots n lots of poetry!!
uncontrolable
i feel this way
when im around you
my heart is free
and it touches you in everyway
wont these dreams come true?
my body yerns to hold u
to clutch u
entangle u in my arms
keep u here
overnight
fall asleep, ill keep you from harm
these visions
i keep seeing in my head
they are images of you
wont you stay here with me
right along my side
your love i wish to consume
with just one step
just one touch
our bodies meet
must kiss u carress u
feel your heart beat
ur everything i wished
everything i wnated
and everything i knew
as our sweat cascades down peach skin
this salty paradise
collides me into u
intimately u whisper into my ears
cant make out ur words, too unclear
dont get up and leave
please dont go
i wish that u would stay with me here
ill reminisce of u and
the taste of ur kiss
each soft pink whisper ill hold in me
this is heaven
-----------------------------------------------------------------
cruel intentions
sealed with a kiss
untold stories
of a love just liek this
one lover bleeds
and another lies dead
the sweat is till salty
in the sheets of his bed
memories of you and i
flashing quickly by
the feeling of you
when you were inside
connected
this love once so sweet
now so bitter
and full of deciet
liek the petals of a rose
this bud has wilted and begun to die
burning this image
in my brain of you and i
your flawfully perfect
upon my knee
kiss my lips
and tell me you need me
disaster
striking with the back of its fist
cremating the image
of our first kiss
like the lick of the flame
this heart is put out
smother me
i wont dare shout
take this ecstacy
i tell you im feeling
and strip it dry
angony beyond healing
project this faux happiness
i pretend is bliss
examine this vision
of our final kiss
drive your car
down to the end of the road
what unfathomable secrets
these somber waters hold
cruel intentions
sealed with a kiss
untold stories
of a love just liek this
one lover bleeds
and another lies dead
the sweat is till salty
in the sheets of his bed
-------------------------------------------------------------------
sweet serinity
honey lips
soft and pink
when ours meet
i melt into you
each pink whisper
i catch in my heart
this moist oblivion
entangles me
i fall consumed
captivated
and you kiss my lips
this sweet serinity
honey lips
soft and pink
when ours meet
i melt into you
------------------------------------------------------------------
burning with ecstacy
welts upon my skin
droplets of sweat
rolling down rouged cheeks
this immortal glow
it lasts forever
like a ray of light
glimmering across the sea
emblazoned visions
passing through my thoughts
unsure emotions
but this burning ecsacy.. this i feel
you touch my skin
and my world falls to darkness
once ive pushed the rock uphill
you roll it back down
once i reach the grapes
and cup my hand to drink teh water
you take it away
pull it away
taunting me
but with you i cant dissmiss it
i can and will be submissive
tranquil, captivated by you
unsure emotions
but this...
this burning ecstacy i feel
-------------------------------------------------------------
enchanted kisses
illuminating my fears
dropping down these tears
rivers of emotion
blankets of pain
i need you to stay sane
enchanted kisses
pockets full of agony
slice this knife deep within
cut out my heart
so i will grieve no more
enchanted kisses
bites of flames
triggering this hidden valleys
slow firey future
inevitablility hovers over
watching over
i am a coward, i watch in fear
as you deteriorate
material...burning material
matter
atoms
breaking you down
into nothing
your enchanted kisses
are nothing
but enchanted kisses
-------------------------------------------------------------
burn
i burn
melt
i met
into ashes of what once was
you
hold yourslef above the rest
high, on some pedistool
a god like figure, you assume your position
seated higher than your equals
burning
as you burn
breaking down
into nothing
i watch in splendor as you deteriorate
each atom
each wasted element
we burn, and we are everything
all the atoms of the earth.. all around you
you burn and you are nothing
nothing but ash
slowly you burn
----------------------------------------------------------------
the pain drips down my arms
fusing energy
sparks flying from all angles
deep
powerful breaths
relieving the knowledge of the world
and with your heartbeat
we live on
we breath on
we walk on
beating
breathing
pounding
aching
this emotion i feel
unexpressable
magical
i can feel it running deep within my veins
i must express this beauty
this found knowledge
philosiphies inspired
happiness taught by pain
what irony in this world...
strength shown through weakness
perfections shown through flaws...
unintentionaly beautiful
that is what you are
with every drip of emotion
that runs down these pale cold wrists
that is what you are
----------------------------------------------------------------
deafening quiet
my eardrums burst
from lack of sound
and communication
straining darkness
these visions that cannot be seen
burn these eyes
so i cannot see
unfeasible terrain lies ahead
radioactive...you force this upon me
explosive sernity
lightly
rising
thinner than air
the breeze taking hold
of my ever aspect
my properties
changed
distorted
these leaves personify me
as i am alone here
i embody the fog
emulating what i cannot see
what i cannot hear
stimulated by the silence
----------------------------------------------------------
silent motion
insolent notion
tainted emotion
jaded exploition
all that falls behind
is everythign we need
from this dulled knife
is not from what we bleed
reach out your hand and slice me
cut me
releasing these emotions untrue to reality
tatter me
undressing me
unveiling me
this is me
what you see
silent motion
insolent notion
tainted emotion
jaded exploition
1 .from you. |
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 15 November :: 4.20pm
:: Mood: anxious
:: Music: What am i gonna do - tyrese
i love emily
im getting ready to go out to din din with my emily DAGZ haha :-)
i miss you baby cakes
ahahhaah i just made angel food cake an dteh cake pan overflowed in the oven and was gonna eat me, it was pretty scarey :-p
welll shits been pretty awkward lately....
everyone seems to be taking megs side, i mean i dont care i still hate her they can have their opinions but i just hate how ppl talk soooo much shit about her and then talk to her n stuff...
i love kelsey so much, and it hurt me so bad to see her crying the other night, why are guys such dicks? y cant they realize what they have? when its so perfect and what theyd been waiting for?
ahhh i miss my brian, hes so perfect and i care about him so much... i hope he feels the same way about me cuz if not then that sucks so bad its not even funny...
humph
well my hairs still wet and i am yet to be ready to go to ems so i gotta go!
ill write back later
-manda
poem
wet
your body pressed next to mine
hearts
beating slowing, in time
thoughts
so many running through my head
shaking
my bodies shaking against this bed
scared
i dont know what im doing here
unsure
cant see things very clear
expressions
your face reflecting love
lips
so soft so pink ours fit like a glove
time
quickly passing with you on top of me
uncontrollable
i dont want to lose you loving me
trust
my heart is in your hands
me
i will meet all of your demands
wet
your body pressed next to mine
hearts
beating slowing, in time
thoughts
so many running through my head
shaking
my bodies shaking against this bed
1 .from you. |
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 13 November :: 9.59pm
meeeee
 | Advanced Big Five Personality Test Results | | Sociability | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Gregariousness | |||||||||||||||||| | 74% | | Assertiveness | |||||||||||||||||| | 74% | | Activity Level | |||||||||||||| | 54% | | Excitement-Seeking | |||||||||||||||||| | 78% | | Cheerfulness | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Extroversion | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Trust | |||||||||||| | 46% | | Morality | |||||||||||| | 50% | | Altruism | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Cooperation | |||||||||||||| | 58% | | Modesty | |||||||||||| | 42% | | Sympathy | |||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Friendliness | |||||||||||||| | 55% | | Self-Efficacy | |||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Neatness | |||||| | 26% | | Dutifulness | |||||||||||| | 50% | | Achievement | |||||||||||| | 42% | | Self-Discipline | |||||||||||| | 46% | | Cautiousness | |||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Orderliness | |||||||||||| | 49% | | Anxiety | |||||||||||| | 42% | | Anger | |||||||||||||| | 58% | | Depression | |||||||||| | 34% | | Self-Consciousness | |||||||||||| | 42% | | Immoderation | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Vulnerability | |||||||||| | 38% | | Emotional Stability | |||||||||||||| | 53% | | Imagination | |||||||||||||||||||| | 86% | | Artistic Interests | |||||||||||||||||||| | 90% | | Emotionality | |||||||||||||||||| | 78% | | Adventurousness | |||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Intellect | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Liberalism | |||||||||||||||| | 62% | | Intellectualness | |||||||||||||||||| | 75% | Take Free Advanced Big 5 Personality Test
.to me.
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silentcriez
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::
2003 12 November :: 10.38pm
Sinking
these manifested tears
fall blankly down these pale white cheeks...
streams of salty droplets
stop the storm, that keeps raging on
endless gray skies
crackling lightning
exposure to the sunlight heals my wounds
but no sun in sight
clounds for days
rivers running rapidly
overflowing watery fireworks
explosions
whirlpools
pulling me under
i try and keep my head above the water
but i am taken
sinking
deeper and deeper until i cant see the sky anymore
only echos of people are heard
and all is tranquil and call is calm
no one is in a hurry and everyone is always happy
down deeper...
the clear cool water fills my lungs
and i close my eyes
these manifested tears
fall blankly down these pale white cheeks...
goodnight
enjoy??
yeah so tyhats how im feeling.
lots n lots of shit....
tears..holly..brian...liz...everything! ah! so much drama!
write back later
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 8 November :: 10.46am
:: Mood: angry
:: Music: fuck you aroura - alkaline trio
FUCK YOU
well last night was pretty gay
meg, if you have a problem with me then u fight me dont get your friends to try n beat me up
thats just stupid
well im pretty deppressed today since im alone
keep thinking about joe alot.. and liek the past n shit
i think im gonna go decorate my walls
byebye
5 .from you. |
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 5 November :: 11.35pm
:: Mood: nostalgic and appathetic
:: Music: when can i see you again - babyface
hummm
Yesterday
say goodbye to yesterday
tomorrows gone too soon
kiss the stars goodnight
hug the man in the moon
roll a couple snowballs
for the very last time
stick teh carrot in the snowmans nose
and pour a glass of wine
getting home from sledding
and talking to a friend
these years have all passed
down hill nows where we descend
no more second chances
or its okay theres tomorrow
the sand has run out
and teh future looks so hollow
empty spaces
void of love
clouded visions
of the heaven above
say goodbye to yesterday
tomorrows gone too soon
kiss the stars goodnight
hug the man in the moon
the moon has risen
supplying some light
and the day is gone
and out of sight
the memories and photographs
are stored away
i asked you once i asked you twice
please dont come back another day
the years i was hurt
are finally past
this shit is over
dont make it last
the bliss of childhood
was never over rated
forget every dinky fight
and every guy youve ever dated
dont ever missplace the friends you had
they shouldnt be lost or left behind
becuz inside them are peices of you
peices that you will never find...
say goodbye to yesterday
tomorrows gone too soon
kiss the stars goodnight
hug the man in the moon
roll a couple snowballs
for the very last time
stick teh carrot in the snowmans nose
and pour a glass of wine
uh yea... pretty self explanitory....
brian, i want you to know im always here for you no matter what...
heres to you...
Brian
a look in your eyes
and you got me hooked
cant pull myself away from you
indescribale feelings when im in your arms
i feel so safe
i feel so warm
even in the rain
and on the bed of leaves
so romantic
and so intimate
i dont knwo how you feel
or hwo you will in the future
but im here for you no matetr what
i
love
you
and everything about you
.to me.
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silentcriez
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::
2003 5 November :: 11.13pm
trying to catch up with this conversation in my journal...
quite interesting i must say...
i guess everything i have to say is in the comments haha
--manda
1 .from you. |
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 4 November :: 10.03pm
im feeling majorly deppressed tonite
ive written so much poetry it isnt even funny
iw anna publish mystuff but compared to my sisters my shit is like crap. hers is soo good and deep and meaningful and when i try n write about how i feel it always comes out dark and negative liek im gonna kill myself or somebody else...
shits been pretty sucky schools not going too well.. im scared for my grades....
and meg ugh meg... reading her journal makes me sick... she talks abotu how she doesnt want ppl to judge her and shit and there she is saying that im a bad person becuz im fat, yes im chubby but that doesnt mean there arent otehr aspects about me that are favorable... i mean god dammit hwo much more shallow can you be
and youc ant do something liek she did to me and expect every1 to feel bad for you
shes a friggen psycho and i dont want to friggin have teh damn "peer mediation" shti with her i dont wanna talk to her shes a bitch and i hate her.. with all of my remaining heart
half of what i wroite about is becuz of teh hate i feel towards her and my mom and teachers and everything in life thats been stressing me
fuck it this sucks
11 .from you. |
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 4 November :: 10.00pm
more poetry
Why Try
why keep on trying
when everything is clearly dying
underneath it
underneath it im crying
get up
fuckign shut up
can you start my brain?
keep this shit from taking over
like an addict with no herroine
silverlining
breath it all in
get up fucking shut up
and wipe me off your shoulder
dont
dont see me anymore
dont
dont bleed me anymore
just plesse die lonely
just fucking shut up
im giving up
why keep on trying
when everything is clearly dying
underneath it
underneath it im crying...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fuck You
fuck you
fuck that
fuck what you think
fuck what you wont do
fuck what you force me to do
fuck that look in your eyes
fuck you when your stoned
fuck when you make me cry
fuck when you toy with me
fuck when you dump me
fuck when you wont call me
fuck when you stall me
fuck you
fuck that
fuck what you think
fucking fuck you
-------------------------------
Warning Signs
warning signs
i sent them
big black letters
DONT STOMP ON ME
warning signs
i meant them
paper flyers dont mean a thing
warning signs
dont get them?
twisted visions tellin me to end this
warnign signs
i told you
i couldnt make it here
warning signs
you saw them
thought nohting of it, i was just acting up
warnig signs
pushed them aside
im a good kid never would i ruin my life
warning signs
dulled with humor
laughing at my insecurity
warning signs
useless now
already done what i needed to do
warning signs
you didnt understand them
when i told you i wasnt happy..
wraning signs
shouldve listend...to the warning signs
the innocent cries
the warnign signs
.to me.
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silentcriez
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::
2003 4 November :: 4.03pm
:: Mood: bitchy
:: Music: wonderwall - oasis
maybe your gonan be the one that saves me
just a bit of poetry.... to painstaking to write them all by hand
UNWANTED
people around me mocking me
baracades keep blocking me
staring straight in my eyes
burning passion rising high
jealousy crowding spaces
seeing all these worn out faces
lost children in the crowd
nothing sappy, nothing proud
indecisive thoughts squirming in my brain
the looks your burning eyes send driving me insane
un related, un relentless,insecure and delirious
mysterious...
the fog and haze are making me fall appart
broken words, from a broken heart
INFINITY
silver lining
worn out hearts
missplaced books
and dusty shelves
time ticking
quickly passing
missing everything about you
censored, blocked out
cant see you anymore
dont feel you, breath you,
need you anymore
untamed, forgotten
and left out there
alone, although i can see you
dont hit me, toss me
pass me around
i wont bleed you anymore
i wont defeat you anymore
unwanted, unbelieveable...
unforgettable..
silverlining
and worn out tears
missplaced books
and dusty shelves
time quickly passing...
Red
disfiguring
taking teh sahpe of anything
rouge, red, rojo, roet
anyway you say it
not glorified at all
this color it pains me
staining my skin
my heart
my brain
my fingertips
like red tears they fall to the table
writing my lifes story in red ink
releasing the phrases my words refuse to speak
releasing the pain, time refuses to heal
this rush
this feeling it pushes me
kicks me
bruises me
red, rouge, rojo, roet
no matter how you say it
not glorrified at all...
Unbreakable
the whispers of the wind
bend and break your will to stay above
penitrable
allowing anything to pass you by
watching all of your feats
so high, so distant, so pourous
a soft breeze passes through golden rays
warming the earth beneath you
untamed
unloved
unkempt
white and angelic you sit
pure and distant from any evi
unmistakeable
your mist encompasses me
captivated
i fall to my knees
blank kisses fall upon my cheek
an angel, a figmant, an illusion
you are no more...
Still Standing
ive been kicked around
and left behind
but im still standing
i fall behing
and i sink below
but im still standing
untrusted with love
unloved by trust
but im still standing
ive been falling lately
its gettting hard to conquer
but ims till standing
the same thing is jerking me
nagging in my brain
but im still standing
even as i sleep...
i dream of you deserting me...
but im still standing
broken glass,
my favorite disposition
shattered fallen to the floor
incapable
words squirming
pushing
bursting through the surface
red wine
lingering,
my favorite disposition
unquenchable nostalgia
shards of glass
streaming red down my arms
red wine,
my favorite disposition
sweet
cool texture..
tart, unbearable after taste
revolting
you,
my favorite disposition
----------------------------------------------
Lying Mirror
your the stranger
i dont know you
youve comitted pseudocide
and your back again
lack of trust
lack of fidelity
your the stranger
i dont know you
stranger looking in the mirror
vacant eyes staring back at me
once so deep
now so shallow
your the stranger
i dont know you
broken glass
streaming red down my wrists
self defense
against myself
your the stranger
i dont know you
---------------------------------------------
change
floating leaves
dropping from lifeless branches
numb
to any frigid cold
to any burning heat
numb to any emotion
wilted and withered
the seasons change and
life must change
all things must change
colors change
turn teh next page
warm
turn teh page again
cold
open a new book
chapters change...people change...
-------------------------------------------
Reflections
reflections
eyes pouring out tears
refect veins pourign out blood
overwhelming
distanced i watch you from afar
making sure not to get hurt
not to risk my heart
reflections
newborn babies
reflect full grown adults
vulnerable in so many ways
soft spots
penitrable
try to watch from afar
always longing for the game
reflections
falling leaves
reflect sorrow
wilted and withered
dropping from lifelsss branches...
reflections
Lying Mirror 2
i look in the mirror
disgusted by what i see
mirror, please lie to me
i look in the mirror
i want to bleed
mirror please lie to me...
i look in the mirror,
unplant this seed
mirror please lie to me
i look in teh mirror
disgusted by me
mirror please lie to me
i look in the mirror
tortured by reflectes of me
mirror please lie to me
i look in the mirror
crying, and begging please
mirror please lie to me
i look in teh mirror,
and begin to pleed
mirror please lie to me
i look in the mirror,
i hate me
i hate me
i hate me
i dont like what i see
mirror please lie to me
mirror please lie to me
-------------------------------------------------
Healing
slits may turn into scars
holes may heal from wounds
pills may dissolve in your stomache
but your mind stays under, consumed
after the blood has been cleaned up
after the caps are screwed on
after the acid is put all away
after the vodkas all gone
since youve left me theres no one here
no one to hug me no one to care
but the wounds will heal, i guess with time
with a blink of an eye or a look, or a stare
the floor is all shiny
the blades been sharpened sitting in teh kitchen sink
the tylenhols waiting dont hesitate
dont look at pictures dont bother to think
leave it all behind now
dont bother living a life
gather your paper and take out a pen
and extole the glimmering knife...
--------------------------------------------------------------------
From you I hide
i hide behind teh smiles
the grins and moon shaped eyes
the brown long hair
and soft pink lips
i hide behind the eyeliner
and shadow glistening eyelids
the black nail polish
the black ink on my wrists
and the rhinestone bracelets
i hide behind the stories
and repuations
that the past has layed before me
i hide behind the friends
the freckles
the poetry
and the coolwater perfume
i hide behind the oppulence
the silver coins
and paper money
i hide behind the humor
to keep me from being hurt
and the jokes should ease teh pain
i hide behind baracades
the stop signs
and red lights
i hide behind precautions
and lame excuses protecting me
from what i know ill become
i hide behind the protraits
the paint the artistic visions
confusing reality with alter egos
i hide behind the roses
which each a bloody prick
and tumble down
i hide behind you
i hide...
------------------------------------------------------------------
Herroine
venomous touch
the sting from a bee
a bite from a dog
the after sting the pain in my arm
the shot in my vein
stop this polonged pain
cant stop the habbit
so hard to break
but this pains so hard to take
stop the imports
the constant shots of the insane
massacar
self defense.. against myself
the pain i feel when i kiss your mouth
mind games torture me
pushig pulling rough as the sea
salting wounds
stick the needle in me
ill be a man, i wont dare cry
stick it in and dont ask why
cuts will heal
and drugs will wear off right?
i wont wake up in a panic in teh middle of teh night
open teh cabinet and grab the next to the sink
And then swallow them bit by bit remembering every scar
As a valid reason for every drink
after its all thrown up
these scars wont be all sewn up
But there is blood underneath that skin
That scar is not so easy to erase
shoot it in, im not insane and wild
maybe im wrong, but everyone gets bored once ina while
i havent written alot.. dont really get the chance to...
just felt like writign so there haha
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 30 October :: 1.50pm
shitt sucks.. hah atahts basically the story of my life
oh yeah thats cool
im at school rigth now sittin with hollis... hmmmm
wlel i got called down to teh office cuz "some1" wrote "manda im going to kill you" on the bathroom stall.. wonder who taht was
immature? yeah i think so
well im gonna go get some music to put in hollys journal cuz shes cool
- manda
.to me.
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silentcriez
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2003 19 October :: 9.52pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: hocus pocus - icp
nothing special
well i havent written in this for a while.. sorry all who care
things have been very busy with school and after school shit...
well last night was the kick ass WICKED WONKA TOUR! it was sooo awesome!!!!! ah im in love with john morris :-) he sso damn sexy!
haha lizzy lost hee glasses!!!!!! aww poor baby, we had to each wear one contact ahahahah
kels n meg got their noses done, they look cute :-) love em'
well its late and i gtg take a shower...
love you bunches
<3 Manda
.to me.
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silentcriez
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::
2003 9 October :: 8.17pm
:: Mood: nostalgic
:: Music: uninvited - alanis
some of my fave songs....
I had no choice but to hear you
You stated your case time and again
I thought about it
You treat me like I'm a princess
I'm not used to liking that
You ask how my day was
CHORUS:
You've already won me over in spite of me
Don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet
Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are
I couldn't help it
It's all your fault
Your love is thick and it swallowed me whole
You're so much braver than I gave you credit for
That's not lip service
REPEAT CHORUS
You are the bearer of unconditional things
You held your breath and the door for me
Thanks for your patience
You're the best listener that I've ever met
You're my best friend
Best friend with benefits
What took me so long
x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x
why do I say I'm fine
when it's obvious I'm not, why's it so hard to tell you what I want
why can't you just read my mind?
Why do I fear that the quieter I am
the less you will listen
why do I care whether you like me or not
why's it so hard for me to be angry
why is it such work to stay conscious and so easy to get stuck
and not the other way around
x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x
Don't gimme no reasons cause you
don't comprehend what am I feelin'
You never think twice before you break all the rules
You gotta be crazy if you think I'm a fool
You're givin' me somethin' I don't need anymore
Just gimme the word and I'll be slammin' the door
x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x
Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able
To make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, till you died
But you're still alive
And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know
You seem very well, things look peaceful
I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know
Did you forget about me Mr. Duplicity
I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner
It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced
Are you thinking of me when you fuck her
x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x
I see right through you
I know right through you
I feel right through you
I walk right through you
You took me for a joke
You took me for a child
You took a long hard look at my ass
And then played golf for a while
Your shake is like a fish
You pat me on the head
You took me out to wine dine 69 me
But didn't hear a damn word I said
x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x . . o . . x
I'm having dreams in the night of you baby
And Sigmund Freud would have thought I was crazy
I wonder why you've become an obsession
All I know is that I need to have your big bad love
Big bad love [3k]
You keep on lovin' and lyin'
You've turning me into a fool babe
But I'm not screamin' or cryin'
There's better things we have to do baby
It takes a lot for me to truly believe
That you could love me unconditionally
And I'm terrified of taking a chance
If you're not ready to believe in romance
Who...I wonder why I am so unrelentless
There's nothing that I can do to prevent this
And the dream I am not apprehensive
All I know is that I need to have your...
[CHORUS:]
Big bad love
I need a love with an attitude
Big bad love
The only kind that I want from you
Big bad love
I need it from you so urgently
Big bad love...need it baby yeah yeah yeah
I'm not avoidin' your lovin'
'Cause I can afford to be blue babe
I keep on pushin' and shovin'
I can't get enough out of you baby
I don't believe your blood is bad to the bone
'Cause then you're different when we're here all alone
And if you knew the game I wanted to play
Now would you say the words I want you to say ...who
I'm am so relentless...I can't prevent this... I am not apprehensive
All I know is that I need to have your big bad love
1 .from you. |
.to me.
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