Zuleika

Zuleika

:: 2005 21 December :: 6.00pm

can't remember what i was going to say.

i'm super buff, but all this food is making me cushy.

last day of work tomorrow. gonna see hunter.

brain ceasing to function.

missing all my girls (kevin and addison included, of course.)

and my boys too...

later :)

3 comments | p.s.

spud	:: 2005 18 December :: 6.18pm birthday tomorrow... stuff and the thing. i work at 7:30 tomorrow. but it's good to get off my ass and make some dough. it was cool to see dav and dorkus and allyson again. i'll be chillin' at my crib until bedtime... smiles and sexiness 11 comments \| p.s.

spud

:: 2005 15 December :: 11.22am
:: Mood: partially exhausted

i like books

i hung out with the gals last night. we went shopping at the mall and stuff. it was really quite fun. but we stayed up a little too late.

i think we went to bed at like 4... and got up at like 9, for breakfast. and i didn't sleep very heavily (probably because i was on the floor). ellen left for home at like 10:30. katie leaves tomorrow at noon. i'll probably leave in a few minutes.

or whenever i get off my lazy ass and get around to it.

it's probably bad that i'm such an open book. certain things shouldn't be said, yet i still say them. sometimes it's funny, but when you need to be serious... well, i'm just not your man, i guess.

p.s.

spud

:: 2005 13 December :: 1.15am
:: Mood: bedtime... good times.
:: Music: SOAD - toxicity

penguins:

"Penguins shoot their poop appx 3 feet.

But once a year they hold an annual poop shoot fair and all the penguins gather to shoot their poop.

The penguin record for poop shooting is 11 feet, 3 inches, held by an emperor penguin which was rumored to have been fed White Castle for the week prior to the event."

- Rich (a.k.a. Buddha)

.
.
.

that pretty much sums it up right there. i spent a lot of time studying with ellen. i got to talk to katie 1 on 1 for awhile too. and i did laundry. all in all, it was productive and i enjoyed myself. let's hope tomorrow proves to be similar. i'm debating on whether or not i should set my alarm. i'm leaning towards no.

and i'm really thinking about a nice long walk through the scenic parts of campus. yepper. that's sounding super-fantabulous.

g'night.

5 comments | p.s.

spud

:: 2005 12 December :: 12.06pm

i realized that i totally ragged on everyone who commented on my last entry. sorry, i know you were just trying to help, and i shot you all down. apologies. i'm just more than a little frustrated... whether it's with myself or with the situation. i really do appreciate the thoughts and help. it has not fallen on deaf ears, however deaf they may appear to be.

in other news, i just got my ass reamed at book buyback. seriously. i took 4 or 5 books from my HNR 215 class and got approximately $12. i paid like $50 for them USED! expensive lesson... but valuable.

and it helped to talk to hunter. i'm not going to cram. i'm not even going to study. i'm simply going to refresh my memory, and that will be enough. i've never studied for a test before in my life. why start now? i'm telling you. that kid is pure, undiluted genius. i need that from time to time. or all the time.

oke doke. almost done with school. time for lunch now...

3 comments | p.s.

spud

:: 2005 10 December :: 4.39pm

due to popular complaint about my previous ambiguity...

WARNING: SAPPY ROMANCE BULLSHIT (please stop reading if you don't wish to hear my current situation. i won't be offended, honest.)

there's this girl that lives in my dorm. her name is katie. i like katie... she's funny and smart and cute and all that good stuff. upon logical discussion of the situation... i was "friended" by katie... friended being the opposite of "girlfriended". which from a logical standpoint, makes sense. it would be silly to get in a serious relationship.

so, my brain is hunky dory. but the situation gives rise to some very intense, internal, emotional ruckus. pushing me a little closer to insanity than i already was to begin with (scary eh?).

and so, i just like hanging out with katie, which we did last night (but not alone). i just have a hard time coping with the feelings generally associated with hanging out with katie... or rather, once we're done hanging out, and i realize i have to go back to my bed and sleep and be lonely like.

to add to the awkwardness, last night hunter was trying to convince me i need to hook up with his ex-girlfriends twin sister. now, i'm not saying that's necessarily a bad idea. but emotionaly complex... especially when katie is sitting right there, asking me what i think.

so, obviously something needs to happen to me to make me stop liking katie like this, or to push katie and i together... which just doesn't make sense to do. and so, honestly, i really want to stop liking katie. but try as i might, it's not working.

so that's where we sit. hopefully this clears things up some, for those interested parties. and anyone who's not interested... then just ignore me already.

9 comments | p.s.

spud

:: 2005 10 December :: 1.55am
:: Mood: sleepy = sappy
:: Music: dave brubeck - someday my prince will come

someday...

someday my prince will come for me. but until then... i'm left to dream.

i had a lot of fun tonight. too much fun perhaps. it's amazing how difficult it is to just be friends. feelings suck. but yet they're the best ever.

and i inadvertently got buzzed off a double-shot of whiskey. whoopsy dupsy. i forgot i hadn't eaten... and i drank it kinda fast. oh well, it happens. and it was a fun half-hour or so, anyway. and the look on ellen's face when she had a sip was absolutely priceless. and katie refrained... at which point i felt like a bad friend. but she really didn't seem to mind. i don't know what to make of her. i really don't. mostly because i just don't want to believe it, i guess. i don't know what needs to happen for this to make sense, but i want it to happen sooner than later already. grr. whatcha gonna do, right?

just be friends... that's what you're going to do. and quit your bitching... you're going to do that as well.

one exam to go! then i'm done with my first ever semester of college. hopefully i don't fail college and they kick me out and never want to see me again. then again, it might be somewhat of a relief.

i'll do fine. but for now, i have to be social.

goodnight, lovebirds.

3 comments | p.s.

spud

:: 2005 7 December :: 8.58pm
:: Music: RHCP - californication

seriously... this feeling can go away any time now... i won't mind, honest.

and just gar.

cut it out.

feelings suck donkey balls. and a chode. feelings suck a donkey chode punch balls ass cock penis rape anal dwelling butt monkey.

.

.

.

i still don't feel better, even after all that. dammit!

EARMUFFS!

5 comments | p.s.

spud	:: 2005 6 December :: 6.57pm :: Mood: shaky :: Music: extreme - warheads jared just came and sang "god rest ye, merry, gentle fags" to me. it was full of good tidings and cashmere. and armani, and something else. i should probably get to work now. as always. p.s.

spud	:: 2005 5 December :: 9.11pm well, that was a blindside. enter deloric/tracey stage left. right. gonna focus. gonna do homework now. may never speak german in here again, and save myself the embarrassment. then again, it might help me improve. 5 comments \| p.s.

spud

:: 2005 5 December :: 7.27pm
:: Mood: tired.

hm.
well this weekend was lots of fun. friday i went to hunter's but didn't spend the night. watched planes, trains, and automobiles, which really kinda sucked. but i had fun anyway. i'm afraid i may have scared katie a little. been a little too forward. but she took it well. and it was fun to play ellen in pool. we'll have to do that again sometime.

saturday i took the car down to saugatuck after grandma's birthday party. got the pickup in cedar. went to dad's, dinner and a movie (christmas vacation) and crashed. sunday was church and grandpa & grandma's, then MIVE KK g2g, then S.O.A.P. downtown, because katie and jim and natey-poo were acting. after the show katie and shannon and i had dinner at the shawmut inn... which i hadn't been to in several years. the highlight was probably the drunk guy telling the bad joke about how the army was better than the marines.

today was class. and my appt. with Chris hendree. my brain is mush for some reason. i hate waking up late. it totally screws with me. i forgot to get the snowball tickets, but i'll get them later.

bunches of other crap. homework to do right now.

i think it would be fun to write an exotic story. then again, maybe not.

it would just be fun to write a story period.

well, i've rambled for long enough. oh, i also did my radio show last night. which is why i overslept.

g'night.

4 comments | p.s.

spud

:: 2005 1 December :: 12.07am
:: Mood: pleasant
:: Music: incubus - out from under

Du gebei�t mich!

shut up, okay! so what if i suck at past-tense conjugation? always naysaying. you fucking dick! you create something, you piece of shit!

anyway.

revising my paper. gonna fail my german quiz tomorrow. personally i suspect that "go-get-em" attitude to be at fault for my lack of progress.

but at least i'm laughing and smiling and regular again. fiber is a beautiful thing.

i think i'll go to bed soon. a couple more quotes. then more cleaning tomorrow during lunch. good thing my lunch is from 10am-1pm. \m/ !!!!

yum yum.

7 comments | p.s.

spud

:: 2005 29 November :: 10.03pm
:: Mood: sexy

bowel movements

i seem to be doing much better. i think i'm finally becoming healthy again.

wrote my paper for my history class today. it sucked. i'll rewrite it and hand it in again thursday, and see if she'll give me a better grade.

speech tomorrow for COM, and the unit 5 test auf Deutsch.

fun times, fun times. i'm only slightly insane, honest.

and kind of... empty, somehow. not sure what it is, or how to make it quit. but it's seriously starting to irk me. maybe if i ignore it, it'll just go away.

2 comments | p.s.

spud

:: 2005 28 November :: 1.10am
:: Music: somnambulant ramblings, on wcks.org

i have a microphone and you don't.
so you'll just have to listen to EVERY DAMN WORD I SAY!

yeah. thanksgiving was cool. i have the runs again. oversharing? yeah, i know.

i really should've just gone to bed.

i've been feeling kinda crappy for awhile now. physically and otherwise. just crappy. but apparently i'm losing weight.

oop. time to talk again.

later, b.

2 comments | p.s.

spud

:: 2005 24 November :: 1.47am

i'm feeling much better now. thanks everyone!

and a happy thanksgiving to you as well...

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hope that worked. i thought it was a cool shot. ten points to anyone who recognizes where it's at.

3 times in one week is just too much damn harry potter. i'm sorry. but it's starting to grate, just a little.

6 comments | p.s.